Shot In The Dark
by mickeiblue
Summary: Some lies are like a blink; natural, insignificant, gone and over almost as soon as they begin. Other lies are earthquakes. Shaking foundations. Love, friendship, family - their foundations were going to be tested, some will crumble in the aftermath. AU s6
1. 23

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting. I do however own a pair of purple socks.**

 _Author note: I have returned to writing, here's to finding inspiration and direction. Enter this alternate season six with love, drama and twists and turns. Enjoy and review, it's been a while so tell me what you think, give me your rants, your love of this old show, give me things you would like and hell tell me what you wouldn't like (doesn't mean I won't or will do them). Like always I have an outline already set in my head._

SHOT IN THE DARK

Chapter One

The line ended leaving only a continuous beep signally the abrupt ending of the phone call, Brooke flinched unsure about the way the conversation had went. Something felt wrong which took Brooke by surprise because so far all she had received was empathy and encouragement. _If you can come by later we can discuss some recent developments_ , what does that mean? Brooke thought, beneath the surface of the simple sentence Brooke felt like there was more depth, more meaning, that was being withheld from her.

Inside Brooke felt a nervous shaking but when she heard the front door Brooke quickly went to finish dressing yet could hear Julian's voice teasing Sam. Moments later Brooke walked into her living area apologising "Hi, I'm sorry. I know that we were supposed to look at costumes today. I've just been totally turned around dealing with fashion femme fatale thwarts killer!" she waved her hands around as she spoke reaching for another magazine with her face on in "the press! Can't they just go back to stalking Britney or something?"

"Oh, come on. Hot clothing designer tracks down attacker and exacts revenge" Julian shot back, loving the sound of it, his eyes staring at Brooke as he framed her face with his spread hands. Brooke gave him an indulgent roll of the eyes as Sam watched them both. He lowered his hands and grinned "forget the press imagine big screen"

A part of Brooke wanted to laugh yet a shadow hung over her, her head lowered, husky voice breaking as she replied solemnly "so I can have a lasting reminder of the fact that my attacker was also Quentin's killer and that maybe if I had reported it-"

Julian cut in sharply, his hand on her shoulder "Brooke, you were attacked by a guy in a mask" he stopped breifly as she eyed the spot where his warm hand touched her skin, without blinking he removed it and continued " even if you had reported it, the chances of the police finding him were slim to none. It's not your fault"

"I know. It's just sad"

"Yeah" Julian nodded and then before it got darker he eyed the room, clapped his hands together and continued, he was he for a reason after all. "Listen, take the day, focus on your work. I'll come back tonight and see where you're at, okay?" he was quick, backing up already, he pointed towards the table while looking at Brooke" I got you a latte, extra foam. See you" and then he ruffled Sam's hair as he walked by "bye, Samson"

The teenager signed, her long dark hair she's just smoothed back once again a mess "bye, Julian" and then as the door shut she turned to her foster mother with a sly smile "you've got a date"

Brow kinked Brooke glared at her "I have a business meeting" she emphasised.

"Yeah, like his junk's got a meeting with your lady business"

"Samantha!"

"What?" Sam laughed.

Brooke shook her head and grabbed the coffee Julian had left her, she took a sip before angling her hand holding the cup to the grinning teenager "we need to talk about your language"

"Relax Brooke" she rolled her eyes and then whispered under her breath "somebody needs to get laid"

A gasp escaped Brooke; her heart ached for this girl with her cheesy smile, turned her inside out in a way only a parent could understand - or at least Brooke imagined that.

The earlier phone call entered Brooke's mind, the reprimand that was about to slip from her stopped, suddenly feelings serious Brooke instead changed the subject "Carine called me"

Sam's teasing smile fell, her knees dropped, "why?" instantly defensive and the way her back straightened reminded Brooke how far she would go to protect this girl.

"I'm sure it's nothing, she just wants to speak to me" Brooke reassured Sam wishing that her words settled the doubt hovering inside her own mind.

Sam pursed her lips then gave an exaggerated "soooooo" her lips popped "how you gonna tell Peyton?"

"I don't think she's going to want her room back" Brooke quipped.

"No, I'm talk'n about you dating her boyfriend"

"Oh my god, not that again" Brooke abandoned her coffee and grabbed her jacket instead, "one, they broke up like a year ago and two she's getting married to _Lucas_ " she buttoned up her jacket.

"Yeah but weren't Peyton and Julian practically like married, ho's before bro's" Sam teased but when she saw the look on Brooke's face she stopped, "what?"

"Nothing" Brooke shook her head, she almost said something but she just shook her head again quickly turning her back to Sam and averting eye contact. _She has no idea_.

"Besides-" Sam grinned choosing to let Brooke's strange behavior go "-you didn't say it wasn't a date"

"I did earlier. I told you it's _business_ "

"He said you were hot" Sam stood walking towards Brooke " _hot designer tracks down attacker_ "

"As in successful" Brooke shot back and then watched as a nonchalant Sam started to rifle through the small bookcase under the staircase, "what are you doing?"

Sam shrugged, "oh just looking for a dictionary. Look here it is" she grabbed a random book and flicked it open, pretending to be reading it "strange, the definition of hot-" she stopped as Brooke loudly grabbed the book out of Sam's hands and dropped it with a thud on the top of the bookcase.

The two of them stood nearly eye to eye, Brooke lifted her right hand and wiggled her fingers in the direction of the door as she said "go to school"

With a huff Sam picked up her nearby bag and swung it over her shoulder before heading towards the door, "while you're looking up the difference between hot and successful look up denial… I think you'll find your name" the door shut behind her.

Brooke sighed before following the girl and opening the door, "love you Sam" she yelled out with a slightly forced smile but her heart swelled with it.

"You too, Davis" Sam shouted back without looking, her had thrown up in a wave as she turned the corner leaving Brooke alone a state she was long use to.

Unable to deal with the silence Brooke grabbed her portfolio and supplied and drove off, she ended up on a picnic table overlooking the river, in the distance the river court was a gray blur. Memories flooded Brooke and flowed through her fingers onto the paper. To keep it safe Brooke focused on her friends Nathan and Haley, it was a joy to sketch out designs inspired by Haley's sometimes quirky and awkward teenage self. Brooke smiled at the end products, her dark hazel green eyes shining. The good memories were broken by the ringing of her phone and like a click of the fingers Brooke was entangled in a heated discussion with her lawyer, her frustration grew "you can tell that harpy she can go shove her offer-" an hour of poison had Brooke growing angrier and angrier and these days she liked focusing on the people who mattered, which didn't include the mother who always let her down "I know, I know. My mother just, arghh, she can have everything else I just want the rights to my last line, I want Baby Brooke, no compromise" and she hung up.

The call had ruined Brooke's burst of inspiration, abandoning her designs Brooke packed away and decided to get over her nerves and stop holding off the meeting she didn't know why she dreaded so much.

 _Breathe. It can't get worse surely_. Instincts ignored Brooke refused to think negatively. Sam was her purpose now, more than that the teenager was her joy. Her redemption.

-x-

The halls of Tree Hill High were slightly too chirpy for Sam, school spirit high, Sam ignored the gossip and rolled her eyes at the teenagers making out against the lockers. From the corner of her eye she spotted a familiar head as she averted her eyes from her least favourite jock "just no" Sam said before any sound could exit his opening mouth, she fastened her steps as she went down the other hallway following the figure "Mrs Scott" she called a few times and then a loud "Haley, wait up"

The older woman turned around with a warm smile, Sam smiled back if not a little shyly "you got a sec?"

"Sure, I was just about to go over some work of you don't mind sitting in my classroom"

"Sure" Sam replied and the two of them continued to walk this time side by side, "so I think Brooke needs a friendly push" Sam git straight to business.

Haley arched her brows and smiled, slightly confused she responded to Sam "you've lost me"

"With Julian" the brunette teen's facial expression said duh, her fast pace continued "Brooke likes him and he likes her but she is in _denial_ , BIG TIME. They've got a date and she thinks it's a business meeting but trust me he wants to-"

"Don't say it" Haley stopped Sam with a hand over the girl's mouth, "okay. Sam, it's great you care about Brooke but Brooke Davis can take care of herself. Don't push her, ok?"

Unimpressed Sam threw her head back, "they are so hot for each other and I get it but I just think you should… tell her it's ok and her bangi… I mean dating Julian will not interfere with the lesbian love thing she and Peyton have going on. I think she needs to know Peyton would be cool with her dating her ex, maybe you could get Peyton to say something…" Sam stopped when Haley started laughing.

The hallway was starting to clear up and when the two of them stopped Sam narrowed her eyes as Haley's laughter became more hysterical.

"What's so funny"

"Sorry" Haley swallowed her laugh and composed herself, "I forget sometimes high school wasn't a live tv show. Sam I don't think Brooke needs Peyton's permission to date her ex considering Peyton is engaged to Brooke's"

"Wait" Sam froze, "get out, Brooke dated Lucas!"

"It was years ago"

"This is so messed up" Sam shook her head, there was a look of disgust on her face "yet explains so much. Actually this works, now Brooke and Julian can get _down to business_ " she suddenly laughed, "oh I am so using this"

"Sam" Haley began in a warning tine but the teenager was already walking away, "SAM!"

"Thanks Haley, good talk!"

-x-

The knock on the door had the disheveled woman at the desk look up, Brooke gave a slight smile "Hi, Carine" and stepped into the office.

"Miss Davis, please take a seat" she looked uncomfortably nervous and once Brooke was seated Carine got up and shut the door and started to clean up her desk a little too fast, her black curly hair falling over her down cast eyes. The moment Brooke had met Carine the slightly older lady had been a little taken aback by Brooke's celebrity but she had always been so eager to please Brooke, so nice and happy to accommodate Brooke's application to foster Sam. The home inspection had been approved, Carine had beamed at Brooke. Now though Brooke got the distinct impression Carine was avoiding something.

"Is everything ok?"

Carine jumped, her mouth opened, then closed, then opened again then it came in a rush " _I'm sorry but your application has been denied, you can't foster Samantha_ "

The words didn't make sense. It was all but finalised. Nothing made sense. Brooke's mind started spinning, no distinct emotion was in charge it was all a mumble as Brooke tried to gather her thoughts "I thought everything was okay? What was it, I can fix it, is it the house? The school? She _is_ safe with me"

"I'm sorry Miss Davis. I understand if I had mislead you, your application and everything was great, it was perfect but it's the system you see. When I went further with the paperwork I realised you'll be automatically declined, we can't sign off on permitting you to foster Samantha while you have your own biological child in the system as a ward of the state-"

Time froze, Brooke's heart plunged, her mind fizzled into a confused mess as everything else Carine said became a blur.

"What, no, sorry, what, I, this can't be right… what?" Brooke mumbled and saw Carine carefully watching her, Brooke stood, not knowing how her feet were able to bare her weight as she shook, "explain because I have no idea what is going on here"

Carine sucked in a breath before slowly retrieving a file, "I want you to know we take confidentiality very seriously here if you are concerned about this leaking" her soft words were sincere yet Brooke fell down back onto the chair still wondering what was going on as Carine continued "on the 23rd of August 2004 you gave birth to a baby boy who was-"

The blood drained from Brooke's face. The date was forever etched into her memory, she could still feel the coldness of the hospital room and the smell, and she could still hear that first cry. Brooke stopped Carine from going any further, "there is some mistake, yes" she gulped agreeing "I gave birth on that date but my child was adopted. I met the family, I chose the family and there must be some confusion. I don't think it's fair to penalise Sam and her chance for a family for a decision I made when I was seventeen which was in the best interest of another child and gave him a stable family"

Carine frowned and opened the file tempting Brooke to snatch it from the woman's small delicate hands. A pair of big brown eyes looked back to Brooke, slightly sympathetic "there's no record of an adoption here. Your son, Miss Davis, has been in the foster care system since birth"

"That can't be right!" Brooke screamed, agitation filled her, she stood.

Carefully standing as well Carine retorted "there's no mistake. Our records show that there is indeed a six year old boy listed as a ward of the state with you listed as his biological mother, and as such we cannot approve Samantha Walker into your care"

" _My son?"_

"Yes"

Brooke tried to wrap herself around it, tried to think that maybe there wasn't a mistake and it was _her_ son, the boy she thought she would never get to be part of his life. One thing was sure, there must be a mistake somewhere. But if it was him…

"Where is he?"

"I can't tell you that" Carine quickly said, "There are channels, official procedures you will need to follow for any information on him or contact"

One question was screaming inside Brooke, "Carine, please, I… if I had _known_ , I'm still trying to understand what happened. But if my son is out there without a home, without parents, then I want him, I want to be his Mom, I want them both, Sam and… what's my son's name?" she quickly changed what she was saying as it hit her she had no idea what to call this boy who had turned her world upside down for a second time.

Carine appeared just as confused as Brooke, she had no idea how _the_ Brooke Davis could have a son she seemingly knew nothing about, she checked the file quickly again before looking back at the young mother "Noah"

She sighed the name in a whisper, Brooke's shiny eyes closing as colour seeped back into her face. Those dark eyes opened again, filled with determination, "how do I get Noah back?"

It was with patience that Carine explained to Brooke that she would need to get in contact with Noah's own social worker and apply to reinstate her parental rights; rights Brooke learnt that she never fully signed away. The situation would have to be evaluated but considering that Brooke had already been approved in most ways to foster Sam the main hurdle would most likely be the fact Brooke gave her son to the state and hasn't attempted to contact him since his birth. Brooke tried to explain and Carine listened but explained that she would need to prove that and go through Noah's social worker and a judge.

Almost an hour later Brooke sat forward "but it's possible"

Carine nodded, her dark eyes wide, "If you can prove what you're saying, that it wasn't your intention, that you had your son's best interests in mind and on learning the truth have straight away done everything to give him a good, safe home, then yes Brooke, I think it's more than possible I think it's probable"

The smile that split Brooke's face, showing off her two famous deep dimples, lit up the room.

"And Sam? What happens to Sam?"

It was then that Carine shook her head again, "I can't let Sam stay with you, not until you file Noah's paperwork and it enters the system. Then I can officially grant you approval but until then Sam will need to stay somewhere else"

Brooke couldn't imagine losing Sam too, couldn't imagine having to tell the troubled teenage girl that she had to leave. Fury once again filled her "you know she was sleeping in a car when I took her in, she was with me for well over a month without anyone knowing she wasn't in the foster home you had placed her in, and you expect me to just let her go back to that?"

"I understand, what happened then was unfortunate" Carine was disgusted at how Sam's previous social worker had let the teenager fall through the cracks, and it was painful knowing that a technicality meant that Sam would have to be taken from a good home where she was happy. After checking a few things Carine gave Brooke a grim smile "There's an opening at a girl's home an hour away, I can give you time to talk to Sam. But tomorrow I'll meet you at this address-" she wrote the address down and slipped it to Brooke, "5 o'clock, you can drop her off but if you don't I'll have to come collect her. She will be safe there for now, and then you do what you have to do Brooke and get your kids back".

-x-

There was something ominous about the blank screen that Peyton was staring at, no matter how many times she looked there still was no call alert or messages waiting. It was unusual but Peyton told herself it was okay. Brooke Davis was a grown woman with a busy life, and a few missed calls didn't mean anything.

A knock on the office door had Peyton look up with anticipation however her smile dimmed when she saw Haley, "Hi Haley"

"You look disappointed?"

"Sorry" Peyton slipped het phone away and gave her attention to the friend who was in front of her, "I was just expecting to hear from Brooke, I've been trying to talk to her all day but it's great to see you as well"

Haley sent the other blonde a sly smile, "what's so urgent?"

Peyton flung her head back and laughed, "you're not going to let it go! Go bother Luke"

"I plan to" Haley smiled as she settled against Peyton's desk, they stood not far apart, both resting against the desk, "do you want to talk to her about Julian?" she changed the subject. Peyton gave Haley a curious look and Haley shrugged "a little bird told me that our favourite dimpled brunette likes a certain film producer new to town and the feelings are mutual"

"Oh, Brooke and Julian. You know, that's cool" she smiled "actually I can see it"

"So none of us have to worry about any crazy love triangles anymore" Haley was half joking but half serious, and Peyton could tell.

The curly blond nodded, "I think we're good on that front"

"Great. So I guess I better go interrogate my favourite brother in law seeing you aren't caving" she winked and went to leave, "bye Peyton"

"Seeya Haley" Peyton waved goodbye and then went back to her phone, still nothing from Brooke. She ached to tell her friend everything that was going on, a part of Peyton was scared but the excitement was pounding against her heard even louder than the fear and nerves.

-x-

After leaving Carine in the office Brooke went home and locked herself in her bedroom, it took twenty minutes to get through to the person who might have answers for Brooke, less time than she expected and when the voice picked up Brooke wasn't sure if it was the same man.

"Is this Anthony Mueller?"

"Yes, speaking"

"Hi, I don't know if you will remember me. You facilitated my son's adoption six years ago-"

"I'm sorry Miss but the terms of an adoption cannot be changed if you-"

Brooke cut in like he interrupted her, reminding herself she had to remain as calm as possible if she was to get the answers she wanted "see that's the thing Mr Mueller, my son wasn't adopted. You were there when I met the parents, you were there when the papers were handed to me but for some reason I was told today that my son has been in the foster care system since he was born"

The silence that greeted Brooke seemed endless, only the heavy breathing on the older man could be heard. Then there was the obvious click of a door, "Brooke Davis?"

Something inside Brooke was released, he did have answers, he did remember her to the point she didn't even to say any more information. _What happened?_

"I knew this day would come" his emotion filled voice reached Brooke, "I had hoped… I'm so sorry"

Brooke sighed "I don't understand what happened"

The whole process had been nerve wrecking but it had meant something to a seventeen year old Brooke, it had meant _everything_. It had taken two months two find the right family but when she had Brooke had been happy that her baby, her innocent baby, would have the type of love and life she had only dreamt of.

Brooke thought back to the couple, "my son was meant to be adopted; Terry and Alex were so excited"

"They were but you went into labour sooner than expected and when they pulled out I was hoping to find another family before the birth"

"Why didn't they want him anymore?" Brooke could not fathom what had made the couple change their mind.

The answer soon came, "they found out they were pregnant"

It made sense in a strange way, it disappointed Brooke but it explained to Brooke why the adoption hadn't gone through it didn't however explain why she never knew. Becoming angry Brooke made her voice harder "and why wasn't I told?"

The sudden silence had a million thoughts race through Brooke's head, finally after what seemed like hours his voce returned "your mother thought it best-"

With that one word Brooke's ears rang, the phone slipped from her fingers falling to the floor, falling to her knees Brooke retrieved the phone and hung up. It was a rage inside her, Brooke had suspected her mother was involved somehow but had tried to deny it, tried to put that thought to the very back of her mind. Tears running down her cheek Brooke rang the familiar number.

"Victoria Davis" the calm voice replied.

It incensed Brooke because caller ID would have let Victoria know it was Brooke calling. All the years of rejection and pain punched Brooke at once, "HOW COULD YOU?"

"What exactly are you referring to this time, Brooke, you seem to blame me for every woe in your life?" something in Victoria's voice seemed different, almost pained.

Brooke flinched at the glimmer of worry that came quickly, she threw it aside and stayed focused, "I am talking about my son, Victoria" and when there was no reply Brooke's tears fell unashamedly, "how could you let them take my baby boy, your grandson, away like that, knowing he had no one to love him and take care of him. How could you lie to me and let me think he was safe and happy and better off without me for six years when you knew he was alone, when you knew he needed a Mom" Brooke got louder "I hate you and I want you to know that any thought I had left that you weren't a heartless bitch monster is completely gone and you _will_ pay for this" and with that Brooke ended the call with a press of a button.

-x-

The coffee bar was still busy as Julian was pulled away from his work when the feisty teenager slipped in opposite him with the same gusto she always does "so, when's this thing with you and Brooke gonna happen?"

Intentionally Julian kept his eyes down on the script he was going over for the hundredth making notes, "Brooke and I are working together" he dryly replied, another note was written down.

"Mmm" she got more comfortable, "I think you like her"

Julian lifted his face, "do not"

"Do too"

"Do not"

"Do too"

He was about the say something else when Peyton suddenly appeared, sliding in beside Sam with an overly happy "so I hear you like Brooke?"

Julian sighed "I have to get an office" he abandoned the pages "Brooke and I are _working_ together"

Peyton wrinkled her nose and looked at Sam "he so likes her"

"That's what I said" Sam grinned and lifted her brows to Julian.

"If I didn't know better I would say you were jealous" Julian eyed Peyton.

Peyton didn't flinch from Julian's stared, it was Sam who broke the awkward moment "up yourself much, not everyone likes you"

"Just Brooke" Julian shot back and Sam grinned, Julian swore, "okay as much as I have enjoyed this I've got actual work to do, goodbye" he gathered up his belonging but before he could leave Peyton's fingers curled around on of his wrists, he turned back and their eyes met "you break her heart, I break your face" and then she let go so he could leave.

Sam nudged her "that was cool. Hey can I have money for a coffee?"

"Shouldn't you be going home?"

"Nuh, Brooke knows I'm meeting Jack" Sam slid to the corner of the booth and Peyton ordered them both a drink. It amazed Peyton what a good job Brooke had done with Sam, the thought made Peyton smile.

When it was time to say goodbye Peyton gave Sam some money and then left, she checked her phone again and frowned yet when Peyton returned home she was shocked to see Brooke's car parked outside Lucas' house, the stranger thing was Brooke was sitting unmoving in the driver's seat still. With a jump in her step Peyton went to her friends blue car and knocked.

Lost in a trance Brooke jumped at the intrusion but after Peyton motioned her to get out she did so and the two hugged. Brooke wanted to cry but she refrained and tried not to pay too much attention to the huge smile that Peyton wore.

The blonde grabbed Brooke's hand and pulled her forward "come inside, I've been trying to contact you all day"

"Sorry, I've been really busy"

"You okay, B Davis?"

Brooke tried to smile but had a feeling she wasn't fooling anyone, " just really need to talk to someone"

"Me too" Peyton practically squealed as they reached the door. After unlocking in and entering the two women found themselves bombarded by noise.

"Whoa, what's this?" Peyton laughed, Lucas appeared with two small boys one on each shoulder, the sight made Peyton's heart melt though no one noticed the colour drain from Brooke as she gulped at the sight.

Lucas leant forward and kissed Peyton's cheek as the boys giggled, "I told Haley I would watch Jamie and Andre"

"Aunt Brooke!" it was the blonde boy who screamed on seeing his godmother, "down Uncle Luke, it's Aunt Brooke" he abandoned his uncle for Brooke, jumping into her arms "HI!"

"Hi, Jamie" she pulled him into her and smelt his hair. Seeing Jamie made Brooke ache for her own son even more, it always had but at the same time it was a comfort.

Peyton wrapped an arm around Lucas now he was free from the boys and then she got the other attention with a whistle "how bout you boys go play outside for a bit while I get us some ice cream"

"Best idea EVER!" Jamie's best friend Andre enthused and pulled Jamie away from Brooke, the boys ran for the backyard, screaming tag the whole time.

Lucas rubbed his back, "they are insane"

The girls laughed one more genuine than the other. Peyton was oblivious to Brooke's desire to get away, meanwhile Brooke wondered what possessed her to come here.

 _Tell them_. The voice inside her urged. They were smiling so much and so happy Brooke couldn't help but do anything except follow them into the kitchen. Peyton placed a glass of water next to Brooke before grabbing Lucas' hand and leaning into him again.

"I'm so glad you came Brooke, this is even better than I hoped" Peyton took a deep breath, "There' something we want you to know. We're having a baby" Peyton's happiness burst from her.

Trapped Brooke didn't know what to do or how to react, and her mouth became frozen in a fake smile. Lucas had an arm wrapped around Peyton yet he noticed how Brooke suddenly stiffened, his eyes narrowed and Peyton's smile began to drop.

"Brooke?"

"That's… great!" Brooke got out though the couple felt like Brooke thought it was anything but great. Lucas gripped Peyton tighter, the blonde looked to her husband then back to Brooke, she tried to smile again. "Really great" Brooke added and a little fake laugh escaped her but she moved forward and grabbed Peyton in a hug, her eyes closed.

Lucas could see that Brooke was still stiff and carefully avoided his eyes, he knew Peyton had been worried about Brooke's reaction. Peyton stepped back from Brooke, hands on her friends arms "You okay? I know you wanted a baby and this is-"

"No, No" Brooke quickly stopped Peyton, "I am so _happy_ for you, for you both it's just the _timing_ " she was genuine, "it really couldn't be worse" and she started a painful laugh. Peyton eyed Lucas, he shrugged, and Brooke backed away, for a moment she turned away, hiding the fact she had to wipe away a stray tear from her eyes.

It was with a slightly higher pitched voice Brooke pulled her phone from her purse, grabbing the first excuse she could think of, "it's just I finished your wedding dress" and she flashed the picture from her gallery up at the couple.

Peyton laughed "is that a corset?"

"Yeah" Brooke drawled, she took the phone back and tried to get under control, "new plan, no corset" and then she hugged Peyton again "I am so happy for you Peyton, really, this is great. You're going to be a Mom" Brooke smiled, her eyes shiny.

 _Shit_. Brooke was really thinking. The timing was horrible and not because of a stupid dress, Brooke didn't know how she could drop her own bomb. As fast as she could she got out of there, throwing some more congratulations at the both of them while carefully trying to not meet Lucas' blue eyes, forgetting to even say bye to Jamie.

"Shit" she whispered to herself once the door was shut.

Alone again Peyton gave Lucas a look, she appeared confused "Well that went… well" she stopped, pursed her lips "she was weird, right?"

"Yeah" Lucas agreed, he rubbed Peyton's arms, "I expected maybe she would be a bit upset but she looked…" he couldn't put his finger on it and then it hit him in a flash "scared".

-x-

Bottle of wine in hand Julian strutted towards Brooke's front door; he straightened his shirt before knocking and waited for the beautiful fashionista to open up.

It took a repeated three sets of knocks before the door slowly opened and Brooke's face appeared, "Julian?" eyes red and puffy it was obvious to Julian Brooke had spent quite some time crying already, she looked confused to see him.

Nervous Julian stuttered a little "sorry, I thought we were going over the costume designs tonight?"

Brooke's mouth gaped open before she squeezed her eyes shut after realising she had completely forgotten, "that's right"

"You okay, Brooke?" he asked, his question was a floodgate and before he knew it their arms were wrapped around each other and her tears were running down his front.

This wasn't business, neither was it the wine and romance he had secretly been hoping for, Julian held her tighter and rested his chin on the top of her head "it's going to be okay" he told her however she only gave a guttered cry in reply, her tears growing stronger.

Brooke cried, she let it go, she cried for the son that was a stranger, for the hopes and dreams she'd had for him, she cried for the daughter she'd let into her heart and might now lose, and she cried for the lives she was going to blow apart as she fought for the two children she loved with all her heart. Brooke knew she would do anything for them, a boy called Noah that she hadn't touched since she carried him in her womb, and a girl she didn't give birth to but had a given her a home, and that anything included telling Peyton and Lucas that Noah existed, that Brooke had given birth to Lucas' child first, a child she never told him about.

Across town a crackling slowly woke Lucas, he lifted his head realising he'd fallen asleep with Peyton in his arms on the couch, the crackling came again "hey Luke. You there? Wake up. Over"

The confusion quickly changed so excitement as Lucas picked up the walkie talkie, "Nate?"

"Yeah, man. These walkie talkies are awesome. Jamie loves his so much that he went to bed with it. Over"

With a startled jump Lucas bolted up, "oh my god, Jamie!"

"Don't sweat it. We picked them up, they're fine. Speaking of which I heard a rumour you're going to be a dad. That's pretty cool, man"

It hit Lucas that he was talking to his little brother on a walkie talkie, something he'd dreamed about when he was younger , he settled back down relaxing. A smile on his lips he replied "yeah, kind of overwhelming. I don't know how you two do it. I'm exhausted"

Nathan chuckled over the line, "it's teamwork. You see that girl lying next to you? Well you don't know it yet but she's a superhero. Trust me. And anyway, we're both here for you, man, with whatever. I just want you to know that"

"Thanks man" he paused and then grinned "over"

"Night bro. Over and out"

"You too. Over and out" Lucas placed the toy down and saw that Peyton was now awake, she rubbed her eyes.

"What's going on?" Peyton mumbled half asleep still.

Lucas shrugged "just playing walkie talkies with me brother"

"That's nice" she snuggled back up against him, "The boys had fun, right?"

"Yeah I think so"

"Good. And I'm not going to fail at this Mom thing, right?"

"No chance" he pulled her even closer, kissing her soft curls.

She grinned, her green eyes lit up as she asked him her next question "and our kid's going to be great?"

"The greatest" he assured her, "best kid in the world"

They exchanged an I love you and gave into the exhaustion that still weakened their bodies, falling back asleep wrapped in each other's arms on the small couch. Their small world at the moment quiet and loving, just the two of them, they could almost forget the rest of the world existed.

-x-

 _The end of chapter one. Review, follow and have a good week._

 _Next chapter: the morning after and Brooke has some explaining to do._


	2. Chapter 2

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting. I do however own three purple monkey stuffed toys.**

 _Author note: So how many people saw my unfortunate typo with the title when I uploaded the fic before I edited - my bad. Thank you for making it to chapter two. Side note this fic is named after Augustana's 'Shot in the dark' so give it a listen. Do you feel it? It took me a while to get the song that I thought had the vibe of the fic._

 _I would like to thank all those who favourited and followed SITD, and big hugs to the reviewers:_

 _Guest: Thank you for your review, I can't say much due to spoilers however I appreciate your words and have many things to consider._

 _Callison: I'm not sure if I am able to repost my older stories, after so many years the completed copies are a question mark. Personally MBK was my favourite to work on and is still close to my heart (I still secretly ship Sam and Julian mwahaha). Thank you for the warm welcome back._

 _Dianehermans: I'm pretty sure you were there many many years ago for the first fic I posted and it's lovely to see your name again. Thanks again._

 _Tania: Lucas and Brooke are my central characters, and in my heart and mind they are always more than just friends and suck at attempting not to be so resort to staying away from each other. IMHO Thank you for your thoughts though._

 _Nena: Why thank you, I hope you continue to enjoy. I feel like I'm riding a bike I haven't touched in years… oh really not, riding a bike is too easy, more like hopping on a treadmill after years._

SHOT IN THE DARK

Chapter Two

Most Saturday's Sam liked to sleep in, today her alarm went off with the radio switching on and music slowing waking Sam hours earlier than she usually would, about to roll over and go back to sleep Sam stopped. Her ears perked at the sound of voices.

Feet dragging Sam rubbed her eyes as she aimlessly walked out of her room "Brooke?" she mumbled then dropped her hands and jumped "what the?"

The scene in front of Sam had the teenager holding in a squeal. Finally she screamed "I KNEW IT" and started dancing.

Julian was frozen, his shoes off and shirt untucked, "ah" he quickly stopped Sam "shhh, Samson. Brooke's asleep"

"You dog! Are you sneaking out?" Sam was calmer as Julian let her go.

Curly hair sticking out Julian shook his head, wide eyed, "NO, well yes, but nothing happened and I think it's best if you don't tell Brooke you saw me"

"And miss my chance to repeal the no boys in your bedroom rule, I don't think so"

Giving up Julian put down his shoes, he couldn't leave Brooke alone to deal with Sam, so instead he went to the kitchen and started to prepare coffee. The night before had Julian feeling very much like he'd walked out in a storm without any protection.

Sam followed, dark eyes big and wild, she took a seat at the kitchen bench "I told you so" the teasing continued until Julian placed a steaming mug in front of her "enough sugar to kill" he told her.

Sooner than Julian expected Brooke appeared, still wet from what must have been a quick shower Brooke's face was unusually pink, her eyes still puffy. Sam straightened up and put her most serious voice on, "explain yourself young lady"

Wrapped in a nightgown Brooke ignored Sam and took the new coffee Julian gave her, meeting his eyes she whispered thank you.

"It isn't what you think" Brooke told Sam, though by the teenager's expression she clearly didn't believe Brooke. Julian started to collect his things again and something in Brooke compelled her to stall him "please, Julian can you stay" she implored. With one of his charming grins Julian nodded and returned to her side, behind the view of the counter Brooke clutched her hand as she met Sam's eyes "I need to talk to you"

Sam gave a nervous laugh, "shouldn't I be saying that" yet she sat more seriously and kept her eyes on Brooke waiting.

First Brooke took a deep breath and then with Julian squeezing her hand she went for it, "Sam, I spoke to Carine yesterday. They aren't approving me as a foster parent"

"What does that mean?" the usually feisty teen sounded vulnerable, her brows low.

Brooke let go of Julian and reached for Sam's hands, clutching them between hers "it's temporary ok, bureaucratic red tape but I'm going to sort it out and then you can come home. Carine supports us, she's found you a spot in a girl's home, it's an hour away, and you can still go to Tree Hill High and we can still catch up and then once all the paperwork is done you will be straight back here"

"But I have to _leave_? This is bullshit"

"I don't like this as much as you but if you want to come back here we will have to play their game, for now Sam, okay, this _is_ temporary" Brooke tried to convey her conviction to the girl and for the first time Brooke saw Sam speechless. Unable to say anything Brooke walked around the kitchen counter and pulled Sam into a hug.

The truth nagged at Brooke, the existence of a biological child was not something Brooke wanted to tell Sam yet because she wanted this last day to be focused on the both of them and there was still so much to sort out before telling people what was going on.

-x-

It was late in the morning when the aroma of food slowly woke Peyton from her sleep, her stomach growled, all of a sudden astonishingly hungry Peyton rolled out of bed and made her way to the kitchen. Lucas was at work finishing breakfast, he smiled at her with frypan in hand when he saw her standing in the doorway, "morning, baby. I've got bacon, eggs, toast, waffles, sausages and even some muffins"

"Breakfast galore"

"Only the best for my baby mama" he answered kissing the top of her head as they met by the table, "sit down"

"Don't mind if I do" though she stared at all the food in front of her, "how are we going to eat this all?"

Lucas laughed, "I'm starved" and continued to stack the table.

The two of them sat together and began to eat, Lucas's plate twice the size of Peyton's. Reaching for the maple syrup Peyton's stomach grumbled as more smells hit her, "Energy food. By the way I think I'm going to need five years to recover before even thinking about a second baby. Last night was an eye opener, Peyton had never been so exhausted, the skinny blonde's history with children was limited with the only child she'd had much to do with was Jenny and Peyton tipped her hat off to the energy she had as a teenager because she didn't remember being this tired back then. There was Angie though Peyton hadn't had much to do with the baby Brooke had taken care of while Angie waited for her heart surgery, other than the original crying that had kept her awake. The thought hit Peyton, her face paled as she lifted her pale green eyes to Lucas, "how long do babies cry for?"

Mouth full of food Lucas gulped, he tried to act confident "not that much" he replied _as long as you constantly give them attention, food, warmth and cuddles, and don't expect to sleep more than five hours at a time for two years._

Peyton eyed him not believing Lucas' statement at all, she could read his face so easily, shrugging it off she kept eating. When her mouth was empty again Peyton spoke, "we grew up as only kids and we turned out fine. I think we were lucky"

The first instinct for Lucas was to laugh but he realised Peyton was serious as she listed off the advantages one by one, her tone casual, and on paper in made sense yet Lucas' heart ached. The truth was Lucas had always imagined a big family, with at least three children, he wanted it loud and chaotic missed with love and peace. Having a sibling when he was a child was all Lucas ached for, a real family, someone to turn to, yet he was sixteen before he and Nathan truly became brothers and they didn't live together until college. Lily, his little sister, was eighteen years younger than him and they barely lived together before he moved out, and though Lucas adored Lily it wasn't like they got to act like siblings their relationship more akin to a close uncle and niece relationship. All in all Lucas really wanted to have more kids and give his children siblings.

"Never say never" Lucas simply replied. 

-x-

It was a painful experience for Brooke as she helped Sam pack her things up, "we don't have to pack it all" she said carefully, her hands folding a jacket up "just enough to make do until you come back"

"You sound so sure" Sam mumbled, clearly not as confident. Brooke grabbed the teenager by her shoulders so they can be face to face. Cupping Sam's cheeks in her hands Brooke forced their eyes to meet.

"Sam. I promise you, from the bottom of my heart, I will sort this out and you will come home"

"I don't get it Brooke"

The confusion was etched on Sam's long face, Brooke could feel it vibrating from her. A small explanation was all she could give, "I just need to sort some things out first before I tell you more. There's some things in my past I need to take care of and I just need to cross some t's and dot some I's and we will be a family again. Things will be different Sam but you will be here with me again" it wasn't much and it left Sam even more confused, "trust me" Brooke added.

Sam shoved some more clothes in the bag, "are you married or something?" she narrowed her eyes "a felon?"

"Sam!" Brooke shook her head. Changing the subject Brooke collected the bathroom bag they packed earlier and placed it next to the other bag, "anyway today is your day. We can do anything you want, the movies, shopping, a fancy lunch, the beach-"

"Gee's you are so PC" Sam rolled her eyes, "I have something better in mind"

Two hours later the two of them were decked out in jumpsuits and protective gear, Brooke lowered her safety glasses "game on, Walker" extremely confident after spending so much time at the gun range. Brooke had never actually gone paintballing before and wasn't entirely disappointed with Sam's decision.

"Whatever old lady" Sam shot back, her long hair tied up on top of her head Sam was grinning from ear to ear, "I got this."

Brooke lowered her lip, "why couldn't we be on the same team?"

"Then I wouldn't get to shoot you!"

"Good point, pay back for sneaking out all those times" Brooke grinned.

Sam lifted her brow in a very Brooke reminiscent way, "who was the one who broke the boys in the bedroom rule?"

"What boy, what rule?" Haley piped up.

"Nothing" Brooke said at the same time Julian stood up from tying his shoe laces appearing right next to Brooke, Haley sent her friend a questioning look which Brooke ignored "I call Nathan"

"Hey" everyone else simultaneously shot back.

Brooke shrugged a shoulder, "he's the athletic one".

Sam quickly pointed to Julian "you're with me" and Julian lit up excited to be picked second, he stood behind Sam, bursting with energy and coyly whispered "full disclosure, I was more a mathlete" and Sam groaned.

"No take backs" Brooke shot out as she pointed and winked at her next choice, "come on Mouth, put those gamer skills to the test"

A second later Sam replied "Mia, mine"

There were only two options left, Sam and Brooke eyed them both, Brooke smiled and was about to speak when Jamie started jumping up and down "I want to be om Sam's team" causing Brooke's face to fall before she lowered her shoulders, "fine, Haley, I pick you"

The other woman scowled, "thanks, Tigger"

"Come on, wifey" Nathan called her over, "I will keep you safe"

"I will keep myself safe, thank you very much!"

The group laughed, feeling easy. Then the games began.

-x-

Walking hand in hand Peyton and Lucas went from item to item, Lucas appearing slightly bored as Peyton cooed over how small everything is.

"I just think it's too soon to be buying things" Lucas pointed out, cringing when Peyton picked up a black onesie.

Putting it down Peyton went for a soft cream blanket nearby, "just looking. Luke, feel this?" she handed it to him "besides you're the one who was talking about painting the nursery"

"Not tomorrow though"

"Oh _right_ " Peyton ignored him, snatching the blanket from his hands "well I'm getting this"

"Fine"

"And this" she picked up a red onesie with _I love Mommy_ written on it.

-x-

When it was all over Sam walked in front of Julian "I should have picked Haley, by the way from now on you're Julia because you hit like a girl"

"In my defense I did kill Brooke"

The saucy brunette strutted pass them, her head flipping back, "I'll remember that"

"It was an accident!" Julian exclaimed.

Brooke quickly caught up to Haley and Nathan, looping her arms between the couple, "I really appreciate you guys coming today, I know it was last minute and all"

"No problem, Davis. Our pleasure, we really had fun and it was nice kicking some ass too"

Haley nodded, "I agree, it was really fun" then she gave Brooke a girl to girl look, "anyway Nathan can you keep an eye on Jamie I'm going to the ladies" and she kept hold of Brooke as she turned away forcing her friend to come with her.

Once alone Haley turned on Brooke, "spill"

"Spill what?"

"Everything! You and Julian?" her eyes were bright with questions and excitement.

Brooke rolled her eyes, "we're friends. He's really been there for Sam and I lately, and they really get along. He crashed at my place last night but nothing happen unless you count me crying on his shoulder until three in the morning" her voice trailed off, "that's why today is happening. I found out yesterday that I haven't been approved to foster Sam, I have to drop her off at a home tonight"

"Oh Brooke" Haley was in shock, 'I am so sorry"

"It's okay, there's a lot to it but it's temporary I just need to sort some things out then reapply" she wiped away a tear, "everything is just _so much_ "

Haley went in for a hug, embracing Brooke in a warm embrace "we're here for you"

"I know" Brooke continued to sink into the hug, "Not going to lie, I'm going to need you"

"You got me" Haley smiled and pulled away, "anything you need?"

"Seeing you asked" Brooke leant back, her mind overcome with everything she needs to do, "I'm going to have to go away for a week or so, I'm hoping to come back occasionally to see Sam but can you just keep an eye on her. Sam acts all tough but she's not"

"Of course I will" Haley nodded, "when are you leaving?"

"Tonight after I drop Sam off, Julian is going to take me to the airport" Brooke stopped and eyed Haley, "don't give me that look. He's a friend"

"Friendship comes with certain _benefits_ " Haley ended for her with a sly tone.

Brooke simply rolled her eyes again, the last thing she needed in her life was a romance. One thing at a time. The two left the bathroom in silence to join back with the others.

-x-

In the doorway to his old room Lucas leaned against the doorframe eyeing all his belongings still spread around the room, he moved forward and made up two boxes he'd collected. One by one he started picking up smaller objects, filling one box for storage and the other to move to other places in the house.

It was strange for Lucas and also a huge eye opener, really setting in how his life was about to change forever. Eventually Lucas came across a small purple monkey caught between his desk and the drawers next to them, he picked it up feeling the soft vibrant fur between his fingers and a small smile came to his lips as he remembered the baby girl who it had belonged to. Lucas went to put the stuffed toy in the second box though his hand stilled as Peyton appeared, "what you got there?" she asked.

A little hesitant Lucas held the purple monkey up "Angie's monkey. Brooke gave it to me after Angie went home"

"It's cute"

"Just like the one Brooke use to have" he carefully placed it down, "I'll give it back to her"

Peyton stepped forward, looking at the boxes, "we should keep it for the baby"

He shook his head feeling instinctively wrong for even thinking about it though instead of arguing about the issue he simply made a mental note to return the stuffed toy to Brooke next time he saw her, "any ideas for dinner?" Lucas changed the subject.

Soft curls bouncing Peyton plopped herself on the bed on the opposite side of the boxes, happy to reply "I was thinking we could go down town and try that new place"

"Alright just let me finish up here"

There was a moment of silence then Peyton stood, kissed Lucas and left the room. Lucas sighed, time was moving so fast, he was almost afraid he would blink and miss it. Instead of doing anymore packing Lucas left to join Peyton and the two of them went in her car down to McLaren St. They were about to sit down when a voice caught their attention, "Uncle Lucas!" the two of them turned to see Nathan and Haley sitting and Jamie running towards them, "hi Uncle Lucas! You need to sit with us"

Picking up his nephew Lucas carried Jamie over to his brother and best friend "that alright by you guys?"

"Of course" Haley smiled and pulled out a chair, Nathan grabbed another for Peyton, and the two of them joined the family.

Jamie climbed onto his uncle's lap, "I got to shoot Daddy and Momma" the boy exclaimed before shoving a breadstick in his mouth. Peyton awkwardly laughed as she eyes her friends and Lucas narrowed his brows.

Haley shook her head with a smile "we went paintballing today"

"It was soooo cool. Mouth shot me but he said he was sorry, and Julian shit Brooke and Sam said he will have to sleep on the couch now"

"James Lucas Scott" Haley quickly slowed her son down, "he had a lot of fun. It was a good day"

"Yeah, but it sucked for Brooke. I don't know how she stayed so happy" Nathan lowered his face and Haley nodded.

Jamie with his mouth full mumbled "Aunt Brooke was sad but she's just really strong because she's Brooke Penelope Davis"

Ruffling his son's hair Nathan agreed "that's right, buddy"

Behind on the conversation it was Peyton who sought an explanation, "what's wrong with Brooke?"

"Oh" Haley's eyes widened, "sorry, you wouldn't know. It all happened so fast. Brooke found out yesterday that Sam can't stay with her, today was their last day together until Brooke can reapply to foster Sam"

Peyton's face fell, she looked at Lucas and then back to Haley, "oh my god, Brooke must be so upset. You know, I knew something wasn't right last night. There she was probably heartbroken about Sam and we tell her I'm pregnant"

"She's just going through a lot at the moment" Haley tried to be sympathetic.

In his mind Lucas was thinking about Brooke last night, he wanted to call her and see how she was though he knew things had changed between them and it wasn't like when Angie left. Peyton was visibly upset and it made it easy for Lucas, Peyton becoming the middle man in the friendship.

"I'll have to go see her tomorrow" Peyton added.

Haley went to speak but Jamie beat her to it "she's going on a plane"

"Just for a week or two" Nathan explained further. The waiter came then changing the subject and before it moved to Nathan's training. It was there though between them, Peyton's mind was elsewhere, the crease between her brows remained the entire time they were there. Lucas grabbed his fiancée's and squeezed, " _it's okay"_ he mouthed just loud enough for her to hear.

-x-

There was a sense of finality to the moment as Brooke stood by the car, face to face with Sam, she held out the bag for the teenager and Sam took it. Brown eyes met dark hazel green, Sam gave a nod and Brooke broke down, hugging Sam and bringing the smaller girl to her chest, "this isn't the end" Brooke promised, "this is the start of a new beginning".

The nod against her chest wasn't accompanied by any words, Sam pulled away and straightened her face though her eyes were red. Seeing right through her Brooke touched Sam's cheek and then rubbed a thumb to Sam's eyes just in time to wipe a tear away, "love ya, kid"

"Love you too, old lady"

Brooke smiled and watched as Sam hitched the bag over her shoulder and turned away. Not breaking her gaze Brooke watched Sam disappear into the building before she allowed her body to sag.

Next to her Julian turned his head to see how she was going, "you ready?"

"Not really" she gave a nervous smile, "I've never been more scared in my life"

"You're going to do great, Brooke, they won't know what hit them" and he smiled, "he's a lucky boy"

"Thanks, thanks for everything. You didn't have to do this-"

"I wanted to" he cut in, "I don't mind at all. You're secrets are safe with me, Brooke Davis"

The smile she gave was nervous because the truth was she didn't really know Julian but he now knew more about her than her closest friends, "I'm sorry for putting you in the middle of this"

"Like I said, I don't mind"

It was too good to be true, Brooke thought. This whole thing was like a dream, it didn't feel real as she got back in the car and headed for the airport. Nothing felt real anymore.

Brooke was floating through the minutes, she wasn't ready and she never would be, she lifted her chin _this is just a beginning_.

-x-

 _Next chapter: Brooke sees her son for the first time._

 _I really wanted to get up the second chapter but I kept writing future scenes, so I pushed them aside and focused on this. It's a bit filler for the next chapter to show development and time moving. Hope it was okay. Hit me back. Please read, review and tell me after all these years what OTH thing do you still hold onto? Something brings you back right. Later_

 _Mickei_


	3. Chapter 3

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting. I do however own a pair of size 5 blue joggers.**

 _Author note: I' m rather nervous about this one. Thought I would get it out of the way. Read, review and hope you enjoy._

Chapter Three

After a second sleepless night in her Californian hotel room Brooke showered and cleaned herself up, taking extra care in her appearance Brooke spent nearly an hour on her outfit before deciding on a simple pale sundress, flats and large sunglasses. It was Brooke's intention to look like a _mom_ , relatable and warm. The fashion icon tried to seek inspiration from Haley as that was the first thing that came to her mind when she thought of a young mom.

The lawyer had been optimistic yet Brooke still felt like everything was some giant tease and the rug was about to be pulled out from under her feet. As she checked herself out in the mirror Brooke heard her phone ring and rushed to get it beaming when she saw the name flashing on the screen "Hi Sam!"

"I can't wait for this bus ride to be over" the teen complained automatically while making vomiting sounds, "an hour to and from school. Kill me"

"Don't joke about that" Brooke still smiled, fixing her hair as she talked to Sam "is it really that bad?"

"Nuh" she sounded relaxed "it's okay. There's a couple of girls here I haven't seen for a few years so that's cool but you've turned me into a spoilt little rich girl, I'm use to style now, my own room and all that fancy stuff" Sam ended in a small laugh.

"Speaking of rooms while you are away I'm going to redo your room, move you to the one upstairs-"

"Right, you that paranoid that I'm going to climb out the window?"

"You said it not me" Brooke shot back, "we can go shopping after school once I'm back. What colour do you want your walls?"

"Grey and miserable like my future"

"Ha ha. Purple it is" Brooke paused and then looking at herself in the mirror still she turned serious, "I love you, you know that right"

"You've told me only like a million times" and Brooke could hear the eye roll in Sam's tone.

Smiling Brooke flicked her sunglasses down, "just making sure"

"Right well before you start crying on me I'm gonna end it here. See ya, Brooke"

"Ok, Take care Sam" and before Brooke could say anything else Sam had ended the call. Brooke placed her phone back into her purse and decided to tie her hair up in a pony.

The to do list seemed never ending and all of it Brooke had to do without telling anyone what was going on. The last thing Brooke wanted to do is get everyone involved if it all was going to fall apart. As optimistic as the situation seemed Brooke had been let down too many times to count on things going as planned or her way, Brooke knew that to get something she wanted she needed to do things herself and go for it. Waiting was not her forte.

Slipping the purse strap over her slightly exposed shoulder Brooke straightened herself up and started to leave, _go get them_.

-x-

Paper scattered across the table Julian was once again at his unofficial office at the café, an ice tea in front of him and a pen between his teeth. Julian wanted his mind on his work and not distracted by sexy brunette's, feisty blondes and crazy love triangle drama that was pulling him in. _No wonder Lucas couldn't make a choice_ Julian thought as he scribbled out the line he'd just written.

Getting back to basics Julian grabbed the large booklet that was the script, full of dread Julian knew it was too long. So much had to be cut and compressed already, it had been hard squishing the two years of drama in the books down to a feature length movie yet it still had too much. It was unavoidable that things would get lost, already much of Brooke and Lucas' relationship had been written out before the Peyton reunion and even that was more a series of proclamations shadowed by the Nathan and Dan with Lucas storyline. It was hard to narrow the focus of the movie down to love, friendship or family. Three car accidents had been written out, Julian didn't even know how such a group could even have that many altercations with cars and it frustrated him to no ends that it might not turn out right due to the restraints.

Abandoning the script Julian's mind strayed to Brooke, he grabbed the novel he had with him which was full of sticky notes in various colours. Blue for scenes that were kept but were altered in a key way, he fingers the blue tabs and opened up to the part he wanted.

The words leapt off the pages, the scene where Brooke and Lucas discuss the pregnancy scare. Both characters vulnerabilities were there for the world to see. Julian was lost in another time and place when he heard his name being called.

"Julian, hey earth to Julian"

Blinking the producer quickly closed the book almost spilling his drink in the move, "sorry Luke"

"That's alright. Am I interrupting?" even as he asked it Lucas still pulled the chair back at sat down opposite Julian, his short blonde hair was slowly growing back and he looked tired as he eyed Julian.

Trying to act normal Julian shook his head, mouth closed tightly in a look that made him appear unusually boyish and innocent, "no just working, going over things"

"You looked worried"

Julian sighed, "honestly I am worried about the length of the script. Once we have a director they're bound to want to change things to so we should try to get it as good as we can so we can have more say"

"I really don't know how we can cut it down even more" Lucas was genuinely baffled about what to do and Julian understood why. The more you lose the more you have to change to fit it together.

Before answering Julian finished his ice tea and then licked his lips, "the pregnancy scare, we can scrap that"

"I thought we were using that to propel Lucas and Brooke back together before Nathan and Haley's reception where they break up again" Lucas talked as if it wasn't his and his friends' lives, and the way it had changed it almost wasn't.

It wasn't a subject Julian wanted to discuss much so he steamrolled over it "it's not needed. Write it out. Move the scene where Peyton gets drugged and Brooke calls Lucas to after the break up and the rest of the script as is we can keep it to just jealousy stirring his interest again before she leaves for the summer. It doesn't matter in the end as long as Lucas finds his way back to Peyton"

"Sure you just don't want to kill someone off?" Lucas joked.

Julian didn't smile, "don't tempt me"

"You okay? I know we aren't friends but…" Lucas squinted his already narrow eyes "you seem more anxious than normal"

"Look Lucas I have a lot on my plate" Julian started to pull all his stuff together, piling it on top of itself Julian opened his bag and pushed it all straight in, "let's just stick to our jobs" and he got out if there as fast as he could without meeting the other man's eyes.

Julian was never the best at hiding things, he wore his heart on his sleeve, he tried to act tough but the façade never lasted and he cringed at the secrets he was currently keeping feeling a sense of wrongness knowing he as life shattering information about other people's lives that they didn't know about.

In the end though Julian was always a sucker for a crying pretty face in need of help, it had gotten him in trouble time and time again, the last time it left him with a broken heart.

-x-

The Californian office was different to the one Brooke was use to near Tree Hill, this one was louder, more crowded and packed in. There were a lot of compartments with busy workers at desk separated by a small divider. Brooke had been told to wait, she furrowed her brow at the noise and everyone in the room. Brooke didn't fit it, she tried to fade away, luckily the place was so busy she was going by unnoticed anyway except for the odd male gaze and the few people who walked directly towards her.

Soon an older woman with dark grey hair up in a bun came straight to Brooke, "Miss Davis?" and after a nod of confirmation "this way, I'll take us to somewhere more private" and she lead Brooke through the chaos to a back room with a large table surrounded by chairs, "sit down, sit down. I'm Maxine Daly and you must be Brooke Davis"

"Yes. It's nice to meet you"

Brooke didn't know how to take Maxine, she appeared grandmotherly at the same time as intimidating ready for battle, however the no nonsense woman went straight to the point, "now Carine the case worker from North Carolina has already spoken to me regarding the situation but I would like to hear it from you, Miss Davis"

"Please call me Brooke"

Ignoring the request with a large smile Maxine continued "why do you want your son back, _Miss Davis_?"

Gulping Brooke straightened up in the chair, feeling like the scared seventeen year old she'd been when she gave birth. The lady kinked a brow and Brooke cleared her throat and spoke "I always _wanted_ him, I always _loved_ him, but I wanted what was best for him more than I wanted him for myself. I was seventeen, alone, afraid, with my parents threatening to cut me off if I kept the baby, but none of that even really mattered" Brooke lifted her chin subconsciously "I wanted my son to have a real family, the best I could give him, and I thought I had found that. Now I find out that the family chosen cancelled the adoption and my son has been living in limbo for six years. I can't give him the last six years back. I can't give him a white picket fence that comes with a married Mom and Dad and two point five kids. But I can give him love, a safe roof over his head and an extended family that will dote on him as much as I will"

"That's admirable" she opened the file she's brought with her, "On paper you seem almost too good to be true"

"I'm real" Brooke assured her.

Maxine huffed, "Carine tells me that you've privately fostered a baby on a medical visa and have also taken in a fifteen year old girl you are hoping to foster indefinitely"

"Yes"

"And I am told-" she checked her notes "Samantha has done exceptionally well in your care"

"Yes. Sam's a good kid, a great kid, at first it was hard but she's come so far and she's great with kids, my godson adores her"

It wasn't the words that got to Maxine, as she stared into the younger woman's dark hazel green eyes; it was the look of love and motherly pride that shone from Brooke as she spoke about the teenager in her care.

Maxine couldn't help but nod and smile but then got back to practicalities, "you own your own home, does it have separate rooms for the children?"

"Yes. I am preparing the room across from mine on the main floor for Noah, and Sam will be upstairs"

"And it didn't take long to find out you are financially secure but as a single mother will your career allow you the time for a young child with Noah's needs. It may take months or even years to build a relationship with the boy and get him to trust and emotionally bond with you, the transition for foster children is often far from easy"

"I'm ready on all counts. My position allows me to work mostly from home with flexible hours and I am taking more and more of a backseat. My focus will be on my family. I recognise that it will take time for Noah to settle in however I am completely dedicated to making this work in any way I can, I am his mother and I've loved him for six years without anything in return. I can love him forever"

Maxine nodded, "you will receive support during the transition and reunification. Carine will be your caseworker in North Carolina, and she can let you know of any support your family may need" she slid a pen and paper over to Brooke, "this is some paper work I will need you to sign"

In shock Brooke did as she was told, ears ringing as she filled out the paper work, Maxine continued to talk.

"I know it may all seem scary but our main objective is to reunite children with their natural families whenever possible. I see no reason to deny Noah this opportunity, and Carine has already done a lot of the work for me, although before Noah may return to your care another house assessment will need to take place to take Noah into account" Maxine added some more papers. "Now because this is going across state borders it is a little bit more complicated with the transition stage, you will need to meet Noah and have regular visitation with him before anything more permanent then we will transfer him to the North Carolina state and you can take him into your care full time, after a few months if all things are satisfied Carine will support you in reinstating all your parental rights and he will cease being a ward of the state and you can wipe your hands free of us"

"Wow" Brooke mouthed, head and heart still reeling

"Any questions?" Maxine asked.

Brooke nodded, moving the paperwork away, "when can I meet Noah?"

"How does tomorrow sound?"

"Surreal" Brooke instinctively said and then grinned "but great" inside she was bursting, itching to scream out her excitement and nerves.

"I'm very happy for you and Noah. I've worked with Noah since he was two, he is a very special little boy who I feel will benefit greatly by having the family you want to give him" the older woman had a deep grin, with her own dimples, the lines on her face softened and she no longer seemed intimidating to Brooke.

A thought hit Brooke, "what about Noah's foster family?"

Maxine gave a thoughtful look, "Noah's situation has been a little unique. After he was born Noah was with an older couple for the first few years and then after I became his caseworker he was moved to another family who had a few foster children with them. Noah needed that extra attention though-"

Something dropped inside Brooke, a dark concern, she felt like she was balancing on the end of a cliff "what do you mean? Is he okay, he's not sick or anything?"

"No, no, nothing like that. Brooke, to be frank, Noah is hard to explain. He's a perfectly healthy little boy, socially however he is hard to connect with, he's very… internal. And very bright. His situation is unique in the fact he does not have a tradition carer, during the school term Noah is a fulltime boarding student at Avery Kent Academy where his care is under the school on a full scholarship, during the holidays he has been placed with another older couple as well spending time at a summer camp we organise"

"So he hasn't had any real type of family life?" Brooke said slowly trying hard to picture it and understand.

Opening the file again Maxine passed along another few pages, "here is the information about the scholarship"

Brooke took it and scanned through the information, as she kept reading Brooke felt her chest tightening "you have got to be kidding me" her face turned red.

Either it was the biggest coincidence ever or Brooke was looking at more manipulation on the part of her mother, her fist clenched, " _Victoria Montgomery?_ "

"Yes she is the lady in charge of the grant and has taken an interest in Noah. A bit aloof if I must say so myself however she has gifted Noah a very special opportunity. I understand though you will wish to enroll him into a day school close to you, his teachers will be able to provide you with the information to help transition him to a new school"

The words were lost on Brooke, her body burning Brooke got out her phone and did a quick google search, "is this her?"

Maxine frowned, "why uh yes" she grabbed Brooke's phone to take a closer look and then returned it suddenly uncomfortable.

Fuming Brooke put away her phone and replied between gritted teeth "her maiden name is Montgomery, that woman is Victoria Davis, my mother" she ended it on a harsh note.

-x-

The sky was unusually cloudy, dark and gloomy compared to the weather of the last week. Lucas threw his jacket over Peyton's shoulders as the two of them walked across the parking lot, their feet moving faster as a light shower began, "I'm freezing and I really, really need to pee" Peyton whined.

Laughing Lucas placed a hand on her lower back, guiding her forward, "soon, Peyt" he told her as he pushed the door open.

"I feel like my insides are exploding, do you think they'll notice if a pee a _little_ " she held her fingers close together but then quickly kissed his lips before racing towards the restrooms.

A few minutes later Peyton returned looking a lot more happy though still slightly uncomfortable, "I checked us in" he told her.

Ten minutes later Peyton's name was called and the two of them stood, "thank god" Peyton drawled, her rocking had started to bother Lucas and he hoped the scan would be quick for her sake.

They were taken to a room and Peyton stretched out on the table, after a quick introduction Peyton lifted her shift uo to her breasts, the sonographer placed a paper covering into her pants hem and pulled them down a bit.

"Now the gel might be cold" he warned.

Peyton couldn't help but grin, "it's okay" she seemed slightly antsy and then uncomfortable as the doppler was placed on her lower stomach.

Soon the other man looked at her, "your bladder is extremely full, if you like you can go empty it a little"

Jumping up Peyton was even happier "yes" and she disappeared.

Lucas smiled at the doctor; the other man smiled back "your first?"

"Yes and only if she has any say in it" Lucas laughed.

Soon Peyton was back acting much more relaxed, she returned to her previous position and this time was nothing but happy as the process began.

"Okay, if you pay attention right here there is your baby"

They both became mesmerized, Lucas sat on the edge of his seat, the image was far from a baby and he wasn't quite sure _exactly_ what the baby was in the particular spot the doctor was pointing to.

"Wow" Peyton lit up looking at Lucas, he quickly kissed her, and she looked back to the screen "why can't we hear the heartbeat" her face appeared concerned.

Moving the picture slightly the doctor went on unconcerned "it's too early to hear at this time but if you look here, that is your baby's heartbeat, very strong… let me just take a photo of it and then I will measure the little one for your dates" a few minutes later he continued "okay, you are six weeks and one day. At the next scan you can hear the heart beat or some women buy a doppler for home just to hear the heart but you're not likely to hear anything until around eight weeks gestation"

The picture suddenly change as the doctor moved around on Peyton's stomach again, a few seconds later he nodded "single pregnancy, no twins" he winked at Peyton and she gave a little laugh.

"It's real now" Lucas whispered amazed, he kissed Peyton again, "thank you"

They were allowed a few more moments and then the doctor cleaned Peyton's stomach, "that's it for today. Your regular doctor should give you your referral for your twelve week scan and I will see you again then. All the best"

It was over all too quickly and the two of them left the room with grins plastered on their faces, Peyton even giggled. After a brief trip to the ladies room again the couple returned outside to the bad weather, this time Lucas lifted his jacket over their heads as they made a run for it.

"This is crazy" Peyton laughed once they were safe in the car.

Lucas agreed, "looks like a storms coming"

"Who cares" Peyton was still smiling and laughing, "who cares about anything; we're having a baby Lucas Scott. You're going to be a daddy" and as they laughed in their safe bubble from the storm their lips met, their laughter swallowed by a gentle kiss that slowly heated up.

-x-

The sun shone over Brooke as she exited her rental car and saw Maxine waiting by the door, the driveway had been long from the huge gate of the academy. Maxine grinned as Brooke came closer, high heels tapping on the ground Brooke smiled right back careful not to go fast for fear of falling on her face.

"Hi" they both greeted and shook hands.

A man in his mid-forties in a navy suit stood with his hands by his side behind Maxine, his smile reached his black eyes as they met Brooke "Hi you must be the lucky woman who is taking Noah from us. A pleasure to meet you" he held out his hand.

"Brooke" she offered as she accepted the handshake.

He nodded and opened the door, "I'm Howard Trinidad the Headmaster here at Avery Kent. I must say it will be sad to see Noah leave us. Ms Daly was saying you live in North Carolina?"

"Tree Hill" Brooke supplied as they followed Howard.

He nodded, "yes, Ms Daly said as much. I have prepared a list of schools I recommend for your considerations and have put together a personal reference for Noah. This way" he stopped at a large heavy door and ushered them into a long hallway.

Brooke felt like she was lost in a large English manor, she couldn't imagine a small six year old or a child even younger living here almost all year round. Though Brooke conceded as he went further in, perhaps it would be a little like living at Hogwarts.

"Where is Noah?" Maxine was the one to ask.

Looking backwards Howard replied, "he's in the music room with Bram and Nicholas. As you can expect it's come as a shock that Noah will be leaving us" he tried to smile at Brooke again "Bram has already started organising things"

Maxine got closer to Brooke, "they don't waste time here. Bram is the professor who has worked closest with Noah, they are quite close, be prepared that he may be a little abrupt" and Brooke nodded at the explanation.

It felt like an hour later before they got to a room and stopped, Howard opened the doors and Brooke and Maxine stepped in and found themselves in a closed off alcove overlooking a large music room divided by a soundproof glass partition.

"Please sit" Howard motioned to the benches against the wall and the two women carefully sat, hands in lap. Brooke stared into the room, there were three adults and around nine students dressed primly. Four boys Brooke counted eyeing each one of them.

 _My son_. Brooke thought as she explored the room, her eyes kept going to one particular boy and something called to her, she couldn't explain it but she _knew_. All those years of looking at little faces in the crowd wondering, scanning every picture and face, now she knew what it was to truly recognise her flesh and blood.

It was just the back of the boy, his warm brown hair was cut boyishly short yet stuck out at the top and at his ears. Brooke could tell he was skinny with pointy wide shoulders that stuck out from his body. There was something in the way he held himself, the shape of those shoulder that were familiar to Brooke.

Standing Brooke found herself up against the glass, her fingers over the spot where the boy's reflection was, "that's him" she said, not a question it was a certainty.

Noah sat in front of a large piano, his focus completely on the instrument, fingers moving fast and Brooke could see him tilt his head to each stroke. _Haley will love this_.

Maxine gave the headmaster a look and then he went and pressed a button, suddenly the room was filled with music and voices. To Brooke it was magical, she was in awe not believing her child could be responsible for what she was hearing.

"G, DAVIS, G. AGAIN" a man yelled as he circled the piano, his hands moving in the air. "Good, again"

Brooke closed her eyes briefly, she could hear the gruff voice instructing more, "next one now. Good, pace it, Davis" she opened her eyes again as the melody changed becoming louder, faster, more passionate. The man no longer said anything, he paused and simply closed his eyes. Suddenly across the room another student on a different instrument started playing along, and then another yet.

The only woman in the room started grinning and then clapping as joy filled the room. The other students stopped however Noah continued the same piece. A second man who sat on a chair, hands under his chin watching Noah, suddenly looked up and stared straight at the three intruders through the glass. Brooke didn't notice him at first but as his stare burnt into her she couldn't help but shift her gaze just slightly to take him in more and their eyes locked.

Head master Trinidad turned the sound off and Brooke felt like she'd been thrown into a pool of water with how suddenly it went silent and cold. They didn't heat what was said though soon the lady in the music room was ushering all the other students out of another exit until it was just the two men and Noah still at the piano. Howard motioned for the women to follow him and then guided them through the door to the music room and Brooke was surrounded by the music again.

The adults didn't speak, the man who had been siting stood and went over to the piano, standing just to the side of Noah between Brooke and the boy. The other man gave a quick firm clap and Noah's fingers stopped so quickly Brooke almost missed seeing his hands move to his lap, "good work today however I see we have some visitors"

It was then that Noah turned and Brooke sucked in a breath. The boy's eyes didn't land on her, his gaze trailed over the three newcomers into the room and then settled somewhere to the side of them.

Green eyes, pale, Brooke hadn't expected that. Noah's skin was flawless, it wasn't porcelain like her but had a peach glow to it like Lucas yet on his right cheek, between his cheekbone and his tiny nose was a single small mole in the same position as her own. Dark eyebrows, with a sharp arch in the middle, the eye shape was hers though the bridge of the nose was Lucas, eyes placed a little closer together like his father, a narrow bridge. The mouth was Lucas too. It hurt in a good way for Brooke to look at him, to actually soak in the features and note each little curve and angle knowing this was her son, not what might be, not a picture in her mind, this _was_ him. The face was long and narrow ending in a pointed chin, the mouth was Lucas too she saw, she waited and though Noah didn't smile he licked his lips and in that movement Brooke saw the dimples that marked both cheeks. Deeper than his father but not quite as distinct as her own.

"Hello" her voice cracked.

One step forward, Maxine grabbed her arm stopping Brooke.

Sounding chipper Maxine brought Brooke's attention to the men "this is the music teacher Nicholas and this is Bram" she smiled even more and focused on Noah "and this young man is Noah August Davis. Noah, I have a friend I would like you to meet" she grabbed Brooke's elbow and moved her forward slightly "this is Brooke Davis. She is here to meet you, say hello" Maxine motioned for Brooke to get down so Brooke carefully kneeled so she could meet Noah eye to eye, he was surprisingly tall so she ended in a bent at the knee standing position that wasn't comfortable in her dress, yet Brooke found the best position she could and smiled.

"Hi, Noah"

The boy didn't speak, he looked to the adults he knew and then briefly at Brooke before he stood making him even taller.

Maxine softened her voice, "Noah, it's polite to greet your guest"

Finally Noah switched his eyes back to Brooke, his pupils dilated, "Hello" he clipped.

Unable to help herself Brooke went to move closer and Noah flinched, immediately Bram who had protectively placed himself between them held out his hand onto Noah's shoulder in a signal for her not to move any closer. _Mine_ , it said.

Brooke stood, she looked around awkwardly and then grabbed a nearby chair and placed it close to the piano, Maxine did the same.

"I heard you play" Brooke told the boy, "I have a friend Haley who loves the piano, she's a singer too"

Noah was disinterested; he replied blankly "I don't sing"

"Well that's alright, neither do I" she laughed at herself, "I can't play the piano either"

"It's very easy" Noah told her, he turned back around, "I can show you" he stood waiting and then turned back to Brooke not quite meeting her eyes, "you must sit for me to show you"

"Oh" Brooke quickly closed the distance almost wanting to stick her tongue out at Bram as she sat at the piano bench, Noah's warmth almost touching her as he took a seat next to her, "I'm a little nervous"

With a quick flick of the wrist Noah started playing, his voice soft "it's like counting see" he stopped the tune and started to do key by key "ABCDEFG, 1234567" and then he repeated it, then his fingers moved more around, numbers coming in a whisper from him that Brooke couldn't understand.

Maxine smiled wider and pressed Noah gently, "Noah, would you like to come for a walk with us?"

Without looking or even skipping a beat Noah shot back quickly, "No, thank you"

"It's a lovely day outside" Howard tried.

Noah stopped playing, "I already noticed it was lovely when I went out at lunch. We had our science class outside as well" his eyes went to the clock, "at four o'clock I go to the library. Ms Daly you may come too"

This wasn't what Brooke expected, she felt out of her depth, trying she gave up on the piano and went straight to the point. Something told Brooke that Noah wouldn't mind that, "can I come too?"

"You _may_ " Noah said before shooting his eyes back to her, brows furrowed "was that not obvious? You are here to see me" he answered his own question.

Bram chuckled, "okay, let's go. Why don't you show Ms Daly and Miss Davis the way".

On the way Noah walked in front with Bram not far behind his and Brooke and Maxine a bit slower, side by side. Grey eyes alight Maxine kept pace with Brooke, "there was no real way to warn you, as you can see you have to experience Noah. He is exceptionally bright that it's hard to remember he just turned six; sometimes it's very hard to talk or reason with him as he has an answer to everything. Very, very independent"

"It'll be like having two teenagers" Brooke smiled back but Maxine stopped her, she took Brooke's wrist and looked at her seriously.

"No, it won't be. Noah may sometimes act like a little adult and he might not talk or beat to the same drum as other kids do however he still is a six year old in every way that counts, his emotions, his heart, and that makes him that much more vulnerable"

Brooke took in the words and nodded, getting too far behind Maxine pulled her back forward to follow Noah and Bram again, this time when Maxine spoke it was more optimistic "Noah might benefit from a type of life he hasn't had yet, one I believe you can give him".

Soon they reached the library, when they got there Maxine turned her attention to Bram "It was lovely of you to show us they way but you may go now, thank you" her words and expression were polite and sweet however it was clear to everyone what she was really saying was _shove off_. Bram cleared his throat and kneeled down to Noah, "would you prefer I stay or go?" he asked the child.

"I am fine" Noah replied, "this way" he told the women and left Bram kneeling by the door as he lead them to a section of the library towards the back. They sat at a table by the window and Noah went off for a brief moment to collect a few books, he came back with four and plopped them down before taking his own seat.

"How are you, Ms Daly?" he asked in a very proper tone.

The older lady smile gently, "I'm good, thank you for asking. Boris has planted a new lemon tree and Harriet is having another baby"

"Is the orange tree still alive?"

"Yes, it is"

"Is Echo still alive?"

"Yes. Would you like to see a picture?"

Noah's nose scrunched up, "would it make you happy to show me?"

"I'll be happy either way"

"Yes, I suppose" he settled on an answer and then took Maxine's phone to look at a picture of a large silver cat, "she has gotten fatter" he turned to Brooke "do you like cats?"

"I guess. I've never really had one around?" Brooke wasn't sure if that was the right answer and Noah quickly turned his head away from her and picked up a book.

"I'll go get a drink of water" Maxine muttered and stood up to leave. Once gone Noah whispered so Brooke could hear him, "she went to leave us alone"

The next half an hour was strange for Brooke, Noah seemed to go from completely ignoring her to engaging in conversation and expecting her to keep up, when she went to read a passage to him the boy called her strange and gave her a book of her own.

After a whole Brooke realised Noah had stopped reading and was looking at her once again, this time he didn't look away when she met his gaze, "will you come here to see me again?"

"Yes, very soon I hope"

"I thought so" he nodded and then scrunched up his face a bit before leaning closer to her with a serious face, "are you my mother?"

It took Brooke by surprise, nothing had been mentioned about it and she wasn't sure what she was meant to say, Maxine who was in earshot had a fine brow arched up, when she saw Brooke had looked at her she gave a nod of approval.

Brooke sighed, she was about to say something she had never said before, "yes, I'm your mom"

Sitting back he looked at her as if contemplating something, Brooke unable to wait spoke again "how does that make you feel?"

A light in Noah's eyes appeared and his shoulders relaxed "I never had a mother before"

"I know but I'm here now and I would like to get to know you if that's alright"

Not answering Noah closed his book and stood, Maxine and Brooke both stood as well, "I have to go" he told them, he titlted his head towards Brooke "you may come again" he told her before walking away with the books.

Maxine clutched Brooke's hand, "you did very well. Come on, let's go"

Outside Maxine handed Brooke a sheet of paper, "I have organised a visiting schedule, here are the times and days. Alright Brooke, I will see you the same time Thursday. Bye"

Alone Brooke walked back to her car and climbed into the driver's seat. _You survived it_ , she smiled to herself. It wasn't going to be like Brooke expected, her mental plan had changed once she met Noah as he was nothing like she had expected. It didn't matter though, the love and protectiveness had ran through her almost to the point Brooke didn't know how she hadn't exploded and grabbed Noah and never let go.

Brooke couldn't see anything but she could feel Noah, even now she could feel his eyes watching her from somewhere in the dark lit school. Waiting for her.

-x-

 _Next Chapter: Brooke returns to Tree Hill._

 _So, I can't take back the path I'm going with Noah now, it's set that this is the stories version of him. What do you think? He's not going to be an easy child to bond with for many Tree Hill characters. And can anyone guess how Noah so easily new who Brooke was?_

 _Thank you all for reading, and for those who reviewed._


	4. Chapter 4

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting. I do however own two couches, one of which I am currently using.**

 _Author note: Thanks to those who reviewed, followed and favourited the story. Don't forget to follow so you don't miss updates. This one took a bit longer, and over the next month I might be slower due to some internet and computer issues I'm experiencing. Imagine a three year old getting his hands on a laptop and getting frustrated he can't get his ABC fix on youtube. This is why I only have 5 minute showers…_

 _I'm not sure who I replied to so I'll to a broad thank you, if you sign in to review I try to personally reply to everyone and their questions._

 _-x-_

Chapter Four

At eight am Julian let himself into Brooke's house with the spare key she had sent him, it was a strange sensation entering the empty room knowing the owner was hours away and he was going to be surrounded by her possessions and life like an interloper. Reminding himself he had permission in a mutually beneficial arrangement Julian relaxed and locked the door behind him, the producer took his bags over to the dining table and made himself comfortable with all the essentials sprawled out in front of him. Julian had two hours before he was meant to let the painters in and he decided to make the most of it.

Right on time there was a knock on the door, Julian was quick to let them in and show them the way. A series of parcels arrived as well and as instructed Julian placed them all in Brooke's room careful not to pay too much attention the room itself. The hour grew late and Julian ended his latest phone call and went to the fridge for a cold drink, it shut softly and Julian found himself staring at an arrangement of photos Brooke kept.

There were a lot of children, Sam included, as well as a small brunette girl with smiling brown eyes, a chubby dark skinned baby and Brooke's godson Jamie too. Julian's eyes were drawn to a particular photo of Brooke and Lucas with the baby between them, almost like a family. The complicated ties that tangled Tree Hill in a knot, Julian stepped away, he realised he was on the outside at the moment and was grateful that the full out would be a superficial burn for him and only if he wanted it. Julian couldn't help but think about his ex Peyton, the curly haired mysterious blonde has appeared so happy with him making him believe they had something special, a strong love, yet at the same time their relationship had been shadowed for her inability to fully let go of Lucas Scott. Slightly hurt, a little bitter, yet at the same time Julian wished Peyton no ill will, it strengthened his conviction that breaking up was the right thing to do because if it hadn't been Peyton wouldn't have run straight home to Lucas, the two of them wouldn't be engaged expecting a baby, and Peyton wouldn't be wearing the grin on her face. Julian recognised that Peyton appeared happy and content, and a part of Julian pitied the delicate blonde and how everything she wanted for her future, everything she expected, was going to have to make room for the unexpected turn that was about to crash into her world.

A part of Julian was curious how his ex will react and cope with the changes, there was a niggle at the back of his mind reminding him Peyton had done a great job of acting happy and content through their relationship, he hoped that her life at the moment was more real or the consequences could be dire.

Julian wasn't sure when he fell asleep on the couch; he woke the next day with a sore neck and a piece of paper stuck to his back. Rushing out Julian went back to his motel room, showered and changed, then returned back to Brooke's place just in time to let the painters in again.

At lunch time Julian packed up and went to meet Lucas at the café, the author was already there with a coffee and sandwich.

"Hi"

Julian slipped into the booth, "Hi. Did you get the email about Jon Chrissie? Are you available to fly to LA this weekend?"

"About that…" the look on his face made in clear Lucas was about to decline, "it's not good timing"

"If you want to be involved the way you said you do then you're going to have to travel eventually, we are not the big guns here, not everyone is going to come to us, we have to go to them and convince them we are worth their time" the frustration in Julian's voice was very real, "it's happening, Luke, you can come with me or stay here"

"I'm sorry but I can't just fly off abandoning my responsibilities" there was judgement in Lucas' reply.

Julian shook his head, "Tree Hill will survive without you, I'm sure Peyton will cope for forty eight hours, she's pregnant not dying" Julian spat.

Lucas froze, "how do you know-"

"Brooke told me" Julian cut in, "we can't stop the movie because you forgot to wear a condom. Focus, Luke"

"Watch it" Lucas warned, "Don't talk about my life like that" then he calmed down, "I'm not going to tell you where to go because I get what you're saying. Make the bookings, I'll talk to Peyton"

"Do what you got to do, just make it happen" Julian frowned, "how's the rewrite going?"

They discussed some more details, the air between them crackling, until Lucas eventually left inwardly fuming. Instead of going home Lucas went straight to Tric and found Haley and Peyton in Peyton's office upstairs.

Haley took one look at Lucas "whoa, what's got you so worked up"

"Julian Baker" Lucas gritted.

Peyton winced and then stood, stretching her fingers along her desk, "what's wrong"

"He's insisting I go with him to LA this weekend"

Haley gave a mock look of anger, "what a jerk, how dare he" she smiled "the nerve of a Hollywood producer you're working with asking you to come to LA with him"

"I get it" Lucas glared at Haley.

After Haley's reaction Peyton frowned and tried to be supportive, "it sucks but I'm guessing there's a reason?"

"A meeting with a possible director"

"That sounds important, Luke. For a second I thought he was planning on stealing your fiancée from you" Haley laughed but Lucas just glared more.

He shook his head, "it's the way he asked, he doesn't need to be such a dick"

"Julian's a nice guy" Haley defended the other man, she looked to Peyton "I mean, you dated him Peyton, he couldn't be that bad"

Before Peyton could reply Lucas ranted again, "and what the hell is going on with him and Brooke, I can't believe she likes that jerk" he shook his head, "you know, she told him about the baby. Our baby, as if that's any of his business"

Peyton walked around the desk and grabbed Lucas, "hey, hey" she got him to look at her, "Luke. He doesn't matter okay, Julian can't touch us. So what if he knows about the baby. I'm not ashamed"

"I know"

"Don't let it get to you. Don't let the past touch our happiness. Work is work but we… me, you and our baby… we're family"

Lucas nodded, his blue eyes slowly becoming less cold "you're right. I'm overreacting"

Not far away Haley watched the two and for the first time she felt a twinge of concern, an undercurrent ran between them and Haley got the uncomfortable feeling they weren't alone.

-x-

This time as Brooke arrived at the school Maxine wasn't waiting instead Brooke was let in by Bram who glowered at her with his bushy eyebrows as he guided her through the school to the gardens.

Brooke walked by the courts before getting to the opening of the path, it was a small maze with the hedge coming up to Brooke's knees. In the centre Brooke could see Maxine and Noah already waiting at the fountain.

When they met up Maxine shook Brooke's hand and the two exchanged greetings before Brooke went straight to Noah who was standing by the edge staring into the water.

"Hi Noah! It's good to see you again" she sat down on the fountains edge, back to the water. This time Brooke was wearing skinny navy pants and a white and blue blouse that slid down on one shoulder, she felt comfortable and tried to act relaxed with Noah as he kept staring into the water. Trying again Brooke softened her voice, "I thought we could do something together this afternoon, is there anything you would like to do? The library maybe?"

Noah stayed silent.

After a few minutes the boy started to walk around, Brooke followed slowly, not too close yet not too far. Eventually Noah sat down on a bench on the other side of the maze, looking out over a section of daisies. Maxine stayed in the centre keeping an eye on them but not encroaching on their time.

Sitting down on the bench next to her son Brooke let out a soft sigh, she gave him a few minutes before turning to face him and found his pale green eyes looking at her, "Ms Daly told me that now you've found me you are going to take me home with you" he tilted his head "that you will be my forever family"

"I would really like that" Brooke nodded, she looked out at the garden again before looking back at Noah, "I remember how I felt when I was at school and my Mom and Dad wanted to take me away from everything I knew, all my friends and home. I was really scared"

"I'm not scared" Noah replied, he said it simply not blinking. His face was entirely serious, Noah's eyes flickered in thought, "what happened when you left everything?"

Brooke smiled sadly, "I didn't, I spent one summer with my parents and then I went back"

"Alone?"

"I had my friends" she smiled again, "they're my family, they'll be your family too"

He nodded and looked down at his small feet that were dangling down. Brooke started to talk about Tree Hill, about the smell of the river after it rained and mood of walking down Grace St or the Riverwalk, she told him about the beach and the river court, and she told him about how the people made the place great.

Noah asked a lot of questions, he asked about school and seemingly irrelevant things about Brooke and her house. Brooke tried to sometimes turn the questions on him to find out what he liked. Brooke discovered Noah's favourite subjects were Mathematics and Science, he really enjoyed biology and astrology, he spatted facts off at a fast pace and Brooke could genuinely enjoy listening to the information he gave her, a lot of it was information she didn't know or had long forgotten.

Eventually he stood up "I would like to go swimming"

"Swimming?"

"Yes" Noah nodded, "you asked if there was something I would like to do. I would like to go swimming" reading her expression he added on "there is a swimming pool inside, it's very warm"

Brooke stood, clapping her knees, "why not, let's go see"

That's how Brooke found herself slipping off her clothes in the change rooms, standing in only her panties, comforted in the knowledge of it just being Noah, her and Maxine in the area Brooke covered her body with a large shirt they had leant her. Maxine sat on a bench watching and Noah stood by the pool waiting, he wore only a red bathing suit that clung to him and goggles. As Brooke had expected from looking at him he was tall but skinny, his bones seemingly sticking out in sharp angles. Noah didn't appear unhealthy just awkwardly lanky.

"All ready" Brooke grinned.

Brooke stepped into the water first, climbing down the ladder she pushed herself away from the edge before finding her footing. The water flowed around her neck, "are you sure it's not too deep for you?" Brooke wasn't sure about Noah's swimming ability but the boy shook his head and then stepped down into the water and swam out pass her.

Together the two of them swam around in circles, eventually floating on their backs. Brooke found herself counting the tiles on the roof as they fell into a long silence, suddenly there was a splash and Noah was kicking in the water next to her, his arms working to keep him afloat "there's 458"

"Sorry?"

"The tiles"

"Oh" she straightened up, with her tip toes she stood in the pool, "you're very good at math's"

"Bram says I am gifted" he swam to the side some more and then swam closer to the edge, Brooke followed until she could stand comfortably. Noah pulled himself up until he was sitting on the edge, his legs in the water, "Bram doesn't like you"

"He doesn't know me"

Noah's face scrunched up in a look Brooke was becoming familiar with, after a moment his face softened "if you are my mother that means I grew in your uterus after you mated-"

"Whoa, hold up there. You sure do know a lot for a little boy" Brooke laughed awkwardly.

Noah ignored the comment, he kept going, "Ms Daly said you found me and that means you must have lost me. How did you lose me if I came from you?"

Swimming to Noah Brooke stopped straight in front of the boy, she placed a hand on the edge by his side, she became all too aware of her surroundings before it all disappeared and there was just Noah as their eyes locked.

"Sometimes Moms do things for their children thinking it's what's best for them even if the child or someone else won't agree, sometimes we make mistakes and sometimes it turns out it is better" Brooke wanted to touch Noah but she held off doing so, "When I found out I was going to have you I was very young, still a child myself. And I thought it was a good idea to find you a different Mom and Dad, ones who are older and really wanted a baby so much but couldn't have one. And I thought I found them. So when you were born I thought you were with a different Mom"

Noah was listening intently. Brooke moved closer and Noah wiggled away an inch, the rejection hit Brooke yet she didn't let it show, "so I thought I was doing the best for my son but I have a mother too and _she_ thought I was too young to have a baby too, she wanted me to do a lot of things that I wasn't sure I wanted to do so when my mother found out that the Mom and Dad I found for you had found their own baby and I might want to keep you she decided to not tell me. And I didn't know where you were but now I've found you" it was a lot, and uncharacteristically Noah hadn't asked any questions while she was talking. Nervous Brooke tried again, "does that make sense?"

"Yes" he replied simply and stood up, "I'm done now"

Brooke pulled herself up with the room Noah gave her and stood up, Maxine walked over and gave them each a towel, and together they walked to the change rooms each going in opposite directions. Brooke rushed getting dry and dressing, placing her damp panties in her bag she slipped on her pants and then the rest of her dry clothes, hair still damp and out Brooke went outside to meet Noah by the change rooms.

Noah came out a few minutes later, his damp hair looking a lot darker, dressed once again in his uniform and this time his blazer was on top of his cardigan.

Brooke smiled when she saw Noah, she wanted to appear as open as she could to him, he didn't smile back but her heart leapt when he spoke, "would you like to see my room?"

As she was about to answer Bram came up to them, "Noah, it is nearly time for dinner, Miss Davis will have to go now, why don't you say goodbye and go join the others in the dining room"

Noah frowned at Bram and the older man cleared his throat, Noah blinked "she is my mother"

"So I hear" Bram drawled clearly unimpressed.

Noah looked back to Brooke, "when will you come to see me again?"

"On Monday"

With a nod Noah seemed pleased, "I can show you my room then if you like"

Brooke knelt down, "I would like that very much" and then she waited, she was very careful "Noah, would it be alright if I hugged you?" as soon as the words left her Brooke held her breath. It was the young mother's greatest wish, to wrap her arms around Noah and hold on tight, to put her cheek against his, to feel his soft hair and smell the scent that is unique to him.

It hurt Brooke to see the shock on her sons face at being asked to be hugged, "it's okay" Brooke told him hoping that her disappointment wasn't too obvious, a part of her wanted to cry though.

As Brooke went to stand back up Noah stopped her with his voice, "okay, you may hug me"

The excitement bubbled up inside Brooke though she contained it to not scare her son, then gently Brooke went to hug Noah. Leaning sideways into the hug Noah kept his arms straight at his sides and faced away from Brooke as she let her arms settle around his thin frame. It was awkward yet perfect for Brooke simply because she was holding him, she ached to feel him hug her back but she embraced this first nonetheless.

It wasn't long before Noah fidgeted and started to move away, Brooke let go and moved backwards, standing up, "thank you. I'm going to miss you Noah and I can't wait for Monday"

"You're welcome" his dimples went on display as he sucked in his lips.

Bram placed his hand on Noah's shoulder and motioned for Noah to leave, the little boy did so and Brooke fumed at the professor for interfering.

With Noah gone he turned his attention to Brooke, "I'll show you the way out" and then he nodded his head to Maxine as she joined them.

A part of Brooke wanted to say she was fine yet knew she would probably get lost so she followed Bram and stayed close to Maxine. Outside Maxine quickly said goodbye and left, moving surprisingly fast for a lady of her age and size. On the other hand Bram stopped Brooke, "Miss Davis, may I talk to you for a minute?"

Inwardly sighing Brooke placed a false smile on her face and turned back, "yes?"

"I have been told you are planning on moving to North Carolina with Noah"

"It's where I live and all his family"

"I understand that" his gruff voice held impatience, "however I propose it would be best for Noah to remain at his school, which he is familiar with and has flourished in for two years. I put it to you to continue his schooling and reenroll him here where he will always be welcome. During the school term you can always visit him on the weekends whenever you desire"

 _Over my dead body_ , Brooke wanted to hiss. After so long away from Noah she wanted to take him home, show him what family is not continue his existence in a _school_. A part of Brooke hoped that Bram was doing this because he genuinely had affection for her son so she tried to answer kindly.

"I appreciate your concern for Noah but I think it's best for Noah to be surrounded by his family in a loving environment, there are many good schools near me and I ensure you that Noah will receive a wonderful education. If you care for my son I'm sure you can understand that I want to have as much time with him as possible"

The man's expression darkened, appearing taller as he straightened up "frankly you have no idea what is best for Noah. You are nobody to him, just some silly girl who got herself knocked up and your selfishness knows no bounds" the words seemed to shock him as much as her.

Furious Brooke span around and walked straight off in fear she was about to slap him which she would have if not for fear of it backlashing on her and her chance for Noah.

The tears started falling as soon as Brooke closed the door in her rental car; alone she let her insecurities and pain overtake her. Shoulders shaking Brooke started the car and drove off, the radio drowning out her sobs.

-x-

In the early hours of the morning Brooke returned to Tree Hill, exhausted the brunette struggled to keep her eyes open. On automatic pilot Brooke stumbled to her room, kicking her shoes off as she walked towards her room. As soon as the door was open Brooke froze, her eyes clearing she took in the boxes and bags over her bed and floor. Ignoring the mess Brooke went to her couch and plopped down, her eyes closing before her cheek landed on the cushion.

It didn't feel like long before Brooke woke to strong knocks at her door, groggy Brooke rubbed her dark hazel green eyes and looked around. The room was warm and filled with light streaming through the windows, as the knocking continued Brooke checked her watch to realise it was now nearly lunch time.

Wishing she could go back to sleep Brooke reluctantly made her way to the front door "I' coming" she called as the knocking got louder.

When the door opened a few seconds later Peyton lifted her glasses up "that's what she said. Hey B. Davis, you look like shit" and the smiling blonde pulled Brooke into a hug. Brooke returned it and then gently pulled Peyton inside.

"Thanks. You look great though"

"I feel it! Jesus Brooke what are you doing in here?" Peyton's attention quickly turned to the mess, "what's all this?"

"Oh" Brooke looked away, pretending to survey the room, "I'm renovating. Redoing Sam's room for her for when she comes back"

"How's that going?"

Brooke smiled as she answered, "good. A couple more weeks at most I think, have to get the house approved. I'm picking her up from school today"

Peyton sat on the edge of the couch, allowing herself to relax even more "that's great. How's New York going?"

"New York?" Brooke was confused, though she quickly clicked and hoped Peyton hadn't noticed her eyes widening, "yeah great" giving the room another once over Brooke did her best happy look for Peyton "you want to go out for lunch? I have to have a quick shower first but I am dying for some fresh air and something to eat"

"Yeah, sounds cool"

Brooke nodded and grabbed a few of the boxes that had been left by the staircase, "right, give me ten minutes" and she rushed to her bedroom.

Within half an hour the two women were sitting across from each other at a table on the river walk, both with a glass of cold water.

"I just want you to know I'm here for you" Peyton was serious.

"I know that"

"You can talk to me"

Brooke tried to smile, the attempt she made was weak barely deepening her dimples let alone reaching her dark eyes. Shaking the truth away Brooke leaned forward slightly, taking another sip to give her more time before she replied "I just don't want every conversation to be tiptoeing around it, Peyton, I'm dealing with it. I'm okay and I'll talk about it when I need to. Can we just not talk about kids and drama and all things Tree Hill!"

Peyton chuckled and the two of them shared a look, "that doesn't leave much" Peyton told the brunette.

"What about Mia's new song?" Brooke asked and just like that the two of them fell into easy conversation.

Eventually Peyton mentioned Lucas, "so Julian is taking Lucas to LA this weekend for some meetings. He's not happy about it but he's got to do what he's got to do, anyway I'll be home alone and I was thinking maybe I could come stay your place like old times"

"The house is crazy at the moment, there's boxes everywhere and there's no spare bed at the moment"

"Right, of course" Peyton shrugged one shoulder "what about my place?"

The words made something ping inside Brooke, long ago emotions bubbled to the service at how easily Peyton referred to Lucas' place as her own. Rationally Brooke knew she had no reason to feel this way, that the words didn't change the truth behind them which Brooke knew without Peyton voicing it. Everything was meant to be in the past, from another life and time, Brooke had no right to feel uncomfortable like someone else was playing with her favourite toy.

Her voice caught in her throat as she was about to answer, Brooke stared wide eyed at the smiling Peyton, it took a moment to regain her composure "I've got a lot to do this weekend and it's the only time I have with Sam before I fly out Monday morning"

The disappointment was clear by Peyton's face, Brooke quickly tried to make it better "what about…" she went through her plans "I get back Wednesday night we could get together Thursday"

"What if you and Sam come over for lunch next Saturday?"

"I won't be home that weekend, I fly out early Saturday" Brooke quickly replied knowing that would be her first weekend with Noah.

Their plans sizzled but Peyton remained optimistic as Brooke secretly was grateful. Soon the time came for Brooke to leave, the goodbye was not as awkward as Brooke felt inside, everything she wasn't telling her friend still hung between them though Peyton was none the wiser with her bright eyes and cheeky smile that barely left her face. It was like she was lying to her yet Brooke told herself she had to wait, she couldn't tell Peyton first. And not telling Peyton was easier than thinking about actually telling Lucas.

Every time Noah looked at Brooke or talked it was a stark reminder that she wasn't alone in this change, the boy was a shadow of the young Lucas that filled the photo albums Karen had once shown Brooke. Which reminded Brooke about the ripples her secret would send out, Noah was not just Lucas' son, or the brother of Peyton's unborn baby; he was the grandchild Karen had never met, the nephew of Nathan and Haley, and the cousin of Jamie. Would they all feel betrayed?

Parking across the road from the back of the school Brooke pulled out the notebook in her bag and began to write.

 _Lucas,_ _I can't explain fully why I lied to you but I do know…_

-x-

 **Next chapter: Getting closer to reveals, who will be the first…How would you tell people in the circumstances?**


	5. All Too Well

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting. I also don't own an iron which became problematic when I decided to make a baby blanket and taggy for my pregnant friend and was told I need to iron material first. I guess not owning a sewing machine is an issue to. Ah, well, I have enough coke zero to last me a month so you know… priorities.**

 _Author note: Thanks to those who reviewed, followed and favourited the story. Don't forget to follow so you don't miss updates._

 _Good news, I fixed my lap top. Bad news, I can't get internet until October! So I want to tell Telstra to go F themselves because this is bad timing. I mean GOT season ffs. They fn know I can't spend a whole day on the phone to get them to admit they are BSing me about it too, don't fn tell me there's no phone line when I am looking at a house full of evidence to the contrary. Okay I need tol not rant about this because grrrrr._

 _In reply to my reviews that I couldn't PM._

 _Guest: I will keep going. Reactions will all be revealed soon and keep an eye out for Victoria returning. Thanks for the review I am glad you are enjoying it._

 _Brucas: I hope to finish it too and not add it to the unfinished list. If need be it might have a sequel so I can give at least a small conclusion and do my later plans as another fic. Thanks for reading, glad you are enjoying._

 _Callison: Here it is, sorry for the long wait. Hope Brooke and Noah comes off well this chapter as well, why did I almost say ep?_

 _Guest: I just want to warn you that this is not a leyton fic, I do not ship leyton nor do I promise stability with them. I mean no offense but for those who will not be able to handle leyton not being_ the thing _in the story then it's just a warning. I do love Peyton and try to respect her when dealing with writing necessary LP. Thank you for your thoughts, and I hope you enjoy this chapter. Especially the end ;)_

 _-x-_

Chapter Five

Outside the sound of rain pelted down, surrounding the room and enveloping the world into a strange silence, Lucas could almost forget the rest of the world outside the house. There was no traffic, no background noise, just the sound of the rain as he finished the second coat of white on the walls.

The room, once filled with his own personality, was now a blank canvas; Lucas placed the roller down and wiped his forehead. Despite the rain it was a warm morning which after the rain was broadcasted to be a hot and clear weekend.

"Hey, need help?" Peyton's voice broke the spell of quiet solitude, Lucas turned his neck around to look at his fiancée, he gave her a close lipped smile.

"Just finished the undercoat, I'll be done once a take the boxes for storage up into the roof"

"I can do that" Peyton was quick to say, she stepped into the room, her tight shirt exposing her still flat stomach, "these ones?"

"No" Lucas quickly stopped her, spinning around he grabbed the box just as she lifted it, "you shouldn't be carrying boxes!"

"Don't be silly, this weighs nothing, it's so light… is this for the baby?" Peyton frowned as she caught a glimpse of material and the purple monkey they'd talked about the other week.

Shaking his head Lucas took the box from Peyton, "just some old things. You go have a shower, I'll take care of this" he gave her a wink and then a kiss before leaving not giving Peyton a chance to stop him.

Once he was up the ladder Lucas slipped the box into the attic storage, yet his fingers paused before he could push it out of reach. Sliding the box back Lucas opened it more, Angie's purple monkey was on top, he carefully lifted it up and put it aside before moving the shirt inside to the corner of the box and pulled out a smaller box tied with string.

"You okay?" Peyton's voice echoed from below.

Startled Lucas dropped the box in his hands, quickly he covered it back up and closed the flaps on the main box shoving it as far back as he could Lucas grabbed the purple monkey and stepped down the ladder.

"All good" and he went to grab another box, soon the sound of the shower joined in the melody of the rain dripping outside. Once Peyton was out Lucas had his own shower before dressing and saying goodbye to Peyton, she kissed him back and then pulled away "tell Nathan I said hi" she told him.

"Sure" Lucas nodded and reached for his keys, "I'll be back by three. Love you"

"You too" she smiled and looked back down at her laptop.

Lucas looked at her one last time before leaving. The rain stopped while he was in his car and before he knew it Lucas was pulling into the driveway, he grabbed the stuffed toy from his bag and jumped out of the car.

When Brooke answered the door her eyes widened, as her pupils shrunk the green of her iris stood out "hi, Luke, this is a surprise"

"Yeah. Just stopping by, I know you fly out soon but I wanted to give you this" Lucas held out the purple monkey and it waited there between them as their eyes met.

Inside her chest Brooke felt something squeeze, she knew he was waiting, "Luke…"

"I just thought you should have it, Peyton wanted to give it to the baby but it didn't feel right. I want you to have it to remember Angie by, to remember how special that time was"

"I-" Brooke gulped, "thanks" her finger curled around the soft fur.

Their eyes stayed connected, Lucas took a step back, burying his hands into his pockets "I better go. Bye Brooke, I hope you have a good trip"

"Bye"

He was about to turn away when instead Lucas smiled softly, "by the way, I like the hair"

Slowly Lucas turned away and jogged back to his car, Brooke sighed and closed the door. It shut with a small thump and she felt her heart turn over, Brooke placed the stuffed toy over on the side table and tried to ignore the pins and needles tickling her body.

Julian raised his brow, "what's that?" he asked from the dining table.

"Just something from a friend"

Sam grimaced, "weird. Anyway when are you guys going to stop pretending that you're actually working and can we please go get some real coffee?"

"You had a jumbo on the drive here" Julian huffed.

With a horrified expression Sam stared at him, "that was three hours ago"

"Samson, you've got a problem"

"It's not a problem if it makes everyone happy, trust me you don't want to see me before my third coffee" she shivered at the thought and Brooke gave a chuckle.

Agreeing Brooke walked around the couch to join them, "that's true"

"And as the mum her opinion counts unlike you're creepy stalker act"

Julian opened his mouth to speak but Brooke reached hi, first, hand on his shoulder she leant over him to look down at the samples "what do you think?" she spoke instead.

"They're good" he nodded and moved the Raven uniforms aside, "I like the letterman jacket design as well"

"Thanks" Brooke smiled and then grinning she looked to Sam, "come on then, we will go get your next fix before my flight"

Pulling a face Sam huffed "right and I go back to the hell house… joking"

"I hate the idea of you there" Brooke choked.

Sam shrugged, "it's kinda like high school except you never go home"

"Carine called me yesterday and she says she's going to come on Monday and assess the house" Brooke began to smile as Sam jumped up and down.

Mouth agape Sam hit Brooke in the shoulder "WHAT! And you are only just telling me, you bitch" but she laughed and grabbed Brooke in a hug.

Choosing to ignore the language Brooke wrapped her arms around Sam and closed her eyes, "I didn't want to jinx it"

"So it should be fine right?" Sam asked as they stepped apart, "I mean this means I'm coming home?"

"Next week, yes"

Sam jumped up again and this time she ran to Julian and jumped into his arms, "good for you, Samson" he grinned placing her down as the teenager beamed between them.

As happy as he was for the two brunettes Julian cut into the celebration, "hate to break up the party but if we don't leave soon you won't be getting that coffee before the plane takes off"

"Oh shit, let's go then" Sam bounced her way to the door.

Brooke narrowed her eyes but gently smiled as she followed, her tone light " _language._ Let's try to pretend I'm a good example before they change their minds"

"Like hell" Sam reached the car and slid in, "if I'm not back here by Friday I will just climb out the window"

Julian shook his head as he listened to their chatter yet inside he was grateful to see such smiles on their faces, he even let Sam choose the music as they drove and paid for their coffees.

By the time they reached the airport the mood had changed, Brooke became visibly nervous, "hey, it's alright" Julian told her.

In the backseat Sam kinked her brow, "you two want a moment alone?"

"No" the adults both replied at the same time and then Brooke looked at Julian, placing a hand over his she smiled timidly "thanks again. I must sound like a broken record but you've been a great friend and I don't know how I could ever repay you"

Julian inwardly flinched but grinned instead trying to act confident, "I'll think of something. Bye Brooke"

"Bye" and then she hopped out of the car to go to the back door, Sam opened it and the two hugged "I'll be seeing you soon, stay out of trouble"

"I won't do anything you wouldn't do"

"That does not comfort me" Brooke grimaced.

With a flirty smile and wiggle of the eyebrow Sam closed the door as she buckled back in, "bye, Brooke"

Brooke huffed as she stepped back onto the platform, "bye Sam" and she waved as the car drove off.

It was a short plane trip though Brooke spent it thinking over the coming weekend; as soon as she landed it would be time to go pick Noah up for the visit. They would spend the night in a resort Brooke had chosen for them yet she hadn't been this nervous about seeing Noah since she had first met him. The last visit on Wednesday hadn't gone as Brooke had expected, Noah had ignored Brooke the entire time, only saying three sentences during the visit, not once had his eyes met hers either.

Instinct had almost made Brooke buy Noah a present for this trip though she had stopped herself and reminded the child inside her that time together was a better way to show her love and commitment.

Still it was with trepidation that Brooke arrived at the academy, once again Maxine was waiting for her and this time Head Master Trinidad showed them to an empty office where Maxine instructed Brooke to sit, "how are you feeling?"

"Excited yet scared" Brooke replied honestly.

Maxine gave one of her large warm smiles and Brooke felt herself relaxing as the older woman nodded with understanding, "you'll be fine just remember not to have expectations or overwhelm Noah, you don't need to squash every memory into the weekend, you have a long future ahead of you and speaking of… we should discuss the move-"

Unable to help it Brooke straightened up eager for the reminder.

"- Now if Carine signs off on your home this week and you can provide a copy of the application to the school you have chosen for Noah then the plan is he will return home with you after next weekend. You will have your regular afternoon visit with Noah on Wednesday, then again on Thursday. On Friday you may pick Noah up in the morning and return him for his last night here, then next weekend like this weekend you can arrange to have him with you in California and you can remain here with him until you fly with him to North Carolina" Maxine smiled again before taking a breath and turning serious, "now due to the circumstances if you haven't applied to a school or he cannot start straight away I will allow it to go ahead providing that Noah is enrolled and attending school before the end of next month. Bram has offered to temporarily move to… Tree Hill-" she checked a piece of paper in front of her "-and privately tutor Noah until he returns to school"

"That won't be necessary" Brooke was quick to say, the idea of the cold and abrasive professor in Tree Hill made Brooke shiver, "I've arranged to tour three schools close by that thanks to Mister Trinidad have already said there is a spot for Noah if I choose to enrol him with them"

"All good yet if you can't supply the prove of it by the weekend then Carine will help arrange Bram to continue Noah's schooling until it is arranged"

Knowing she had to agree Brooke simply didn't say anything, soon she was leaving the office and making her own way to Noah's boarding room at the school.

When she knocked Brooke waited for the quiet "come in" and then she pushed the door open to find Noah sitting cross legged on his floor, books opened around him, "hello Brooke"

"Hi Noah" she sat down next to him, "this looks interesting"

The boy nodded and then quickly one by one closed all the books, "is it time to go now?"

"Yes. Is there anything you want to bring with you, anything at all?" Brooke gave an easy smile, her knees aching from the awkward position she sat in, nerves making her stiffen more so than she intended, yet Brooke joined her son on the floor and her eyes sparkled as she looked at Noah's skinny frame.

With quick speed Noah stacked the books and then reached for the last one and held it to his chest, "may I bring a book?"

"That sounds like a good idea. Did you pack a toothbrush and clothes? Don't forget your swimsuit"

The boy nodded and stood, he had a small backpack waiting "I have everything" green eyes staring at Brooke's neck instead of her eyes he gave a decisive nod "I am ready"

Brooke arched her brows briefly before trying to gracefully stand, for a second she fumbled and Noah reached out to steady her, "thank you" she whispered.

For a moment their eyes met, Brooke once again was fascinated about how pale and clear his green eyes were, and then to her shock he gave her a look, one brow raised that was scarily familiar, a look Brooke saw in the mirror often. For a second Noah looked older and then he was a young boy again.

Brooke lifted the bag, "I'll take this"

"Thank you" he nodded again and with his book at his side Noah exited the room leaving Brooke to follow. Maxine met them at the bottom of the staircase and greeted Noah happily, the boy spoke to the older woman in his usual dry tone yet Brooke could hear the true affection in his words.

Grateful for everything Brooke shocked Maxine by hugging her as they said goodbye and then gently guided Noah to her rental car, it was with a deep sense of satisfaction that Brooke watched Noah buckle his seat and then she started the engine. Truly alone with her son for the very first time Brooke wanted to dance, she wanted to sing to the world, yet she resisted trying to act calm and collected for Noah.

Noah was his usual silent self as they made their way to the resort Brooke went between giving Noah quiet time and chatting easy to him even if he seemingly ignored her, though she knew he listened carefully to everything she said.

As soon as they were out of the car Brooke slipped on her large sunglasses and carrying their bags she walked with her high heels clicking with Noah by her side. The fashion designer in Brooke was already looking forward to seeing Noah in something other than a school uniform or something that looked like a uniform. Clothes should express the personality of the person wearing them and Brooke was mentally dressing her son.

After checking in they settled into their two bedroom suite and Brooke placed their bags in each of their rooms, she slipped off her heels by her bed and called for Noah to join her.

"Hey, sweetie, I have something to show you, come over here" Brooke motioned for him to join her and Noah slowly met her by the bed, his neck craning to see what Brooke was holding on the bed.

Once Noah was close enough Brooke handed him the gift box, "this is yours" and she held it out.

Tentatively Noah took the box, "sit on the bed" Brooke instructed casually and Noah placed the box down to climb onto the bed as Brooke sat down on the edge, inching closer to the top she made herself comfortable and lifted one leg up as she leant against the pillows.

Crawling with the box Noah joined Brooke at the pillows and sat cross legged as he opened the gift.

Brooke held a breath as Noah lifted the book up, it had been Carine who had told Brooke what to put in it and Brooke had added some personal extras.

Without prompting Noah spread across the bed next to Brooke, his back against the pillows and the book in his lap. The book was opened to the first page, Brooke leaned over and tapped the large photo "this is a picture of me at my store in Tree Hill" she turned the page "and this is our house, and your room…" Brooke smiled, "I got you bunk beds so you can choose if you want to sleep up top or down bottom"

"I like the bookshelf" Noah mumbled, his eyes narrowing as he looked at the pictures.

"We still need to fill it" she held in a grin and watched Noah turn the page, "that's Sam"

"The girl who lives with you?"

"Yes" Brooke ran a finger over Sam's glossy face, in the photo the teenager was sitting on the kitchen counter with a tub of ice cream, under that photo was a picture of Brooke and Sam together at outside Tric.

The next two pages were of locations Brooke dreamt of taking Noah to, her favourite part of the river and her spot on the beach, the river court and the park she had taken Jamie to every chance she got.

Brooke turned the page and sucked in a breath, "this is me in high school and that's Lucas, your dad" Brooke licked her lips, grateful she hadn't burned all the photos of the two of them together. The next page was Nathan and Haley's wedding which allowed Brooke to show Noah his aunt and uncle, and his grandmother, "she's going to love you so much" Brooke grinned and turned the page again this time with an updated photo of Karen with Lily next to her, "and that's your Aunt, her name is Lily and she's even younger than you, Lily is the same as your Uncle Nathan's son Jamie, and here he is, he's your cousin" Brooke had written names under all the pictures.

After the last page was turned and Brooke had shared a little bit about the whole Tree Hill gang she gave Noah's hair a soft touch, "you can keep this"

"What about your family?" Noah asked, his head tilted towards her but his eyes still on the book.

Brooke sighed "this is my family. You and them"

"But you aren't married to my father?"

"No. He's with Peyton, the-"

"Curly haired lady"

"Yeah. But they're my friends, sometimes your friends are your family too" even as she said the words a sharp pain pierced through Brooke because she was keenly aware of the lack of family she had and as much as she loved those in her life she knew how fragile her connections with them were, that all it would take is one mistake, one misunderstanding, one moment to break the bond and become nothing to each other. There was a difference. At the moment they all seemed to be more than just family, but all bonds can break.

Brooke stared at Noah. This though, this was forever. There was nothing Noah could ever to stop Brooke loving him, nothing to stop her trying, and it was her mission to let him know that and feel that so they could always be there for each other.

For the first time ever Brooke had a family of her own, a real family. It may be small yet it was hers.

-x-

The next morning Brooke woke, she instantly knew it must be before five yet she was suddenly wide awake unable to sleep. Without opening her eyes Brooke smiled, in his sleep Noah had rolled over so his cheek rested on Brooke's shoulder, his soft hair tickling her nose, and his arm flung across her. Brooke was uncomfortable, wet from Noah's drool, and she was burning warm on one side and freezing cold on the other, and it was the best moment in her life so far.

The warmth and affection, Noah's vulnerability, it was the most she had received from him so far even if it was unintentional as they fell asleep together on the bed as Noah read Brooke a story in his bed. Still smiling Brooke settled into the pillow deeper and with her free arm covered the both of them again and tucked the corner on her side under her bottom. Like her Noah was a blanket hog.

With a deep breath Brooke sniffed in the clean smell of Noah's hair and then let it out slowly. For two hours Brooke stayed still enjoying the feel of her child sleeping next to her, imaging their bright future ahead of them. Finally as the sun started to peek through the window Brooke left the bed and had a quick shower, she blow dried her hair and slipped on the dress from her fall line last year. It wasn't Brooke's usual style for her own self yet it was something different, something new, bluer than her normal outfits though Brooke thought it matched the lighter hair tone she now sported, the colour and highlights turned her usual medium to dark brown hair to a soft light sandy brown that shone. The restyle was a little shorter than usual, especially at the back, yet Brooke had hoped it would allow her to get around with Noah unrecognised for a while so she could focus all her attention on him.

Barefoot Brooke went into the living area of their suite, stepping over the scrabble tiles scattered on the floor and checked on a still sleeping Noah before cleaning up the mess they'd left out the day before.

Just as Brooke was about to sit down on the couch Noah came out of the other room, rubbing his eyes, still looking sleepy, "good morning" she quietly alerted him and Noah turned his attention to her before looking around the room.

"Good morning" he replied back in a monotone, his skinny body straight and stiff.

Breaking the mood Brooke suggested ordering room service for breakfast and started to ask him if there was anything he wanted to do, Noah shook his head, clearly in one of his more introverted moods, "what about the beach?"

"I've never been to the beach"

"What? Well I think that settles it then, would you like that?"

Noah's nose twitched, "I think so"

Wanting to give him space Brooke went and packed for the day while they waited for breakfast, inside she was brimming with excitement and the idea of taking Noah to the beach for the first time, thrilled she gets to experience a first experience with him.

Breakfast was a silent affair and then Noah went to shower, when he came off there was an aura to him, though he appeared calm and collected Brooke could see a light in his green eyes, a shimmer of pleasure and anticipation.

Grinning, dimples on thick display, Brooke looped the bag over her shoulder, "ready?"

-x-

"Are you ready?" Peyton asked, she huffed when there was no response "Luke?"

"Sorry, did you say something?" Lucas narrowed his eyes in confusion, immediately going back to the mess around him, "hey babe, have you seen my black... don't worry found it-"

"Luke, can you stop for a second" Peyton cut in, crossing her arms the angry blond glared at her partner "we are meant to be looking at venues today"

"That's today?" he froze, hands still above the folder he was about to grab, shoulders dropping Lucas sighed, "the appointments not until the afternoon I thought, I have to meet Julian" he sighed again at the cold look Peyton gave him, "Peyt, can I just meet you there later-"

"What about the churches?"

Picking up the folder Lucas shrugged, "I trust your judgement, it's not like I haven't seen them all before"

"Fine but don't blame me if you're left at the same alter twice" it came out in a sarcastic drawl.

"Ha ha" Lucas was not amused, "how about I give you a lift to Brearley Rd and pick you up from Saint Maria's when I'm done with Julian? Two hours tops I promise" satisfied with the compromise he tried to charm her with a Scott smirk.

Unable to stay angry at him Peyton relented, a part of her wished Lucas wasn't so focused on the movie and she was still solemn as the two of them drove down the street.

"I'm sorry" his words came out hollow, "we have plenty of time to plan for the wedding, that's why we didn't elope remember so we could have all the time to make the day special"

"That's easy for you to say" she snapped her face to look at him "you're not the one who has to worry about walking down the aisle bigger than a whale"

"And you will still be beautiful" he grinned, "you're not fat Peyton, you're pregnant-"

"Did you just call me fat?"

His blue eyes widened, "no, no, I said you are _not_ fat, the complete opposite of saying you are fat"

"Are you saying I look fat?"

"Okay, now you're being unreason-" his words stopped midsentence as Peyton reached over and hit his shoulder with his folder "PEYTON, I'm driving" Lucas inwardly swore and would have said something about hormones but was afraid of the reaction.

Half joking Peyton rolled her eyes, "lucky otherwise I might do worse. I think you owe me ice cream"

"I feel like I've been trapped in a corner here"

"A big tub for tonight _and_ I won't share" she smirked.

Lucas gave her an indulgent smile, "it's a deal" _I'll get my own anyway_ "tonight we can block out the rest of the world, just you and me, candle lit dinner, three course meal"

"I like the sound of that. I have to meet Haley and Mia later but I should be home by seven and we can shut out the world then" she wriggled her eyebrows and Lucas laughed.

It was easy, this life of happiness with clear direction in front of him, no complications, no drama. Lucas had made his choices, and put all the what if, could be, doubt behind him, locking it up deep inside and walking away.

-x-

The day was perfect, clear and bright, the sand warm beneath their feet and the shore quiet. Other families played along the beach, children splashing unworried in the shallows, Brooke had relished the normality of it, and here she was spread out on her stomach along the beach towel, working up a tan as she helped Noah build a sandcastle.

Overly precise Noah was meticulous as he slowly moulded the wet sand, his brow furrowed in concentration, he had a way of showing Brooke what he wanted her to do without even saying a word. The fashion icon patted and smoothed the wall closest to her and then rolled over and sat up, "I'll go get some more water" bucket in hand Brooke leisurely jogged to the edge of the water then walked in far enough to scoop up a bucket of water.

Eyes still on Noah she smiled from afar, today had been everything Brooke could have dreamt of even if he had insisted on putting on his own sunscreen, with the bucket heavy and full Brooke walked back towards Noah, and this time she was slower and she tried to stop the bucket from spilling.

They went back to work, Brooke more observing than contributing, "it looks amazing Noah" Brooke told him with enthusiasm as Noah's pace slowed. Leaning back on his folded legs the boy rubbed his hands together to wipe sand off his hands, "best sand castle I have ever seen" she finished.

Noah glanced up, "it's a fort"

"Best sandfort I've ever seen then" she tried not to sound sarcastic and quickly changed the subject "what if we have another swim before lunch?" there was no doubt Noah would agree, Brooke had quickly learnt that her son enjoyed swimming and it appeared to be the only true recreational activity he indulged in.

Yet twenty minutes later when Brooke told Noah it was time for lunch he made no complaint, following close behind the older woman as they packed up their things and headed back to the hotel to change before leaving once again to explore the strips along the beach. It was a small cosy restaurant that Brooke eventually led Noah to, finding a seat at one of the window tables.

Suddenly talkative Noah started discussing the Great Barrier Reef off the coast of Australia, Brooke didn't know enough to comment on the facts he listed off yet listened intently while they read the menus at the same time. When the waitress came Brooke gave her order, with a tap of her pencil the young girl smiled at Brooke "and your son?"

For a split second Brooke was almost confused and then her surroundings came back to her and Brooke looked at Noah who was watching her with his pale eyes. Her son. Grin growing wide Brooke felt the tingles run up her arms, "do you know yet?"

"Yes" he looked to the waitress, "may I please have eggs benedict and an orange juice"

"Coming your way" the young waitress winked at him and Brooke smiled on with pride at how cute and polite Noah was, she itched to smooth back his wet hair and instead took a sip of her drink.

"Eggs benedict?" Brooke kinked her brow in question.

Noah gave a soft nod, "yes, I like eggs" and then he gave a smile and Brooke wanted to get out a camera and take a photo yet resisted.

Eyes so similar to her own stared at Brooke, almost unblinking, "what do I call you?" like always his tone was the same ad it was hard for Brooke to read his emotions.

"Well, I think that is completely up to you" giving a soft smile, dimples still deep, Brooke tried to wear her heart on her sleeve yet not come off too strong "I would love you to one day call me Mom but when that day is will be your decision, so you can call me anything you like, you can even just call me _hey you_ " she lowered her voice is a whisper as if it was a secret and added "most people call me Brooke"

Two blinks later Noah folded his hands over each other on the table, "I'll think about it"

"We have a long time to figure that out, I'm not going anywhere" Brooke reassured. It was a promise she knew she could keep, no matter what it took.

When it came time to say goodbye Brooke got down in front of Noah, "I'm so glad I found you again. I'm going to miss you like crazy"

"Thank you" he stared at the ground, "I had a lovely time"

"Me to and I will see you again soon" she wanted to hug him but Brooke held back and was grateful when Noah looked up to look at her, "bye, Noah"

After a heartbeat Noah took a step back "bye"

Heart thumping Brooke left Noah by the opened school door, ignoring Bram who stood with him, she was two metres away when she heard her son's voice "wait… wait" and Brooke flung around her arms almost opened to welcome him but Noah wasn't asking for a hug, he had stop a few steps away from her, hand out, "you can have this. I would like you to have this, I found it at the beach" in his open palm was a sandy rock and as Brooke took it and ran her fingers over it she rolled the rock in her hand seeing the fossil on the other side.

It wasn't a hug yet Brooke wondered if it was just as good, it filled her with warmth, "thank you Noah, I love it and I will take very good care of it" because Brooke knew she had just been given a bit of his small heart.

-x-

It was now or never, Brooke knew she had to do it and the timing was never going to be perfect but Lucas had to find out at some point especially as Brooke wanted to get things ready for Noah as soon as possible and she couldn't keep it a secret for long. It had been hard enough already and Brooke had to make sure Lucas was the next one to find out. After much thought Brooke decided it would be best to tell Lucas by himself away from Peyton and then let him tell her. At least she hoped he would tell her.

There were few times Brooke was as nervous as the moment she knocked on the front door. Seconds ticked by her stomach churning. Grateful she didn't eat on the plane as her stumbled danced inside her as the silence stretched. Brooke knew Lucas was home yet there was no answer, refusing to give up Brooke went around to the entrance into the kitchen and knocked again - still no answer.

Third times the charm, the anxious brunette went to the last door. The one that entered into Lucas' old room, she could hear noise and she knocked. This time when there was no response Brooke simply opened the door and froze.

Lucas stood shirtless and shoeless in only a pair of slacks, headphones in his ears, Brooke almost wanted to smile at the sight of him lip-syncing the lyrics to the song he was listening to as he painted the walls a soft yellow. The room was bare and Brooke had a sudden pang of loss, so many memories of walking through this very door hit her.

It was a moment before Lucas realised he wasn't alone, he quickly tore off his headphones "Brooke!"

"Hi Luke, I knocked but…"

"Sorry about that. Ah, Peyton isn't home"

This was it. Brooke stepped forward "Actually I'm here to talk to you" it felt more and more awkward. Lucas was clearly surprised and trying to hide it, he quickly dropped the roller.

A hand went to the back of his neck "sure, ah come in, let's go to the kitchen, you want something to drink?" he was already out of the room leaving Brooke to follow him.

It was a landmine as Brooke stepped over supplies and then the boxes stacked along the hallway, she called out after him "no I'm fine" and she entered the kitchen. Lucas was already standing with a beer, he'd been sweating and looked relieved to take a break. Brooke noticed his bare stomach and made a point not to let her eyes stray down, "you wanna get a shirt?"

He laughed but disappeared and then returned wearing a blue hoodie "how you doing?"

 _Where to begin?_ Brooke didn't know what to say or do so she took a seat, the speed of her action causing the chair to scratch the floor with a loud screech and looked for from the graceful movements she usually made. Sensing something was wrong Lucas sat down too "hey, Brooke, talk to me?"

"I need to tell you something. Something big and I know-" she gulped "- you are going to have a hard time understanding and I know this is bad timing and it's going to change everything-"

"Brooke, you're rambling" he stopped her.

Their eyes locked, he was smiling with a look that screamed everything is okay and it made it that much harder. Brooke couldn't look away, this wasn't unusual, no matter the state of their relationship or friendship their eyes had this way of just freezing together like everything else disappeared. It made talking to each other really easy and other times that much harder.

"You're not going to like me" she whispered.

With that Lucas stiffened, he straightened up, backing up as far from Brooke as he could without moving from the kitchen chair. Lucas didn't know what Brooke wanted to tell him but he knew it wasn't going to be an enjoyable conversation. He was at a loss, truthfully Lucas had to admit that since his engagement to Peyton he'd lost touch with Brooke which made it even stranger that she was knocking at his door wanting to talk. Thoughts crossed his mind. Did she know something? Perhaps something about Peyton he wouldn't like.

Neither spoke for a few minutes and then he moved in the chair and Brooke spoke.

"You have a son"

The words confused him, he didn't quite understand, he didn't know what they were having, Peyton wasn't far enough along yet, his thoughts were jumbled in the few seconds before she added slowly, " _we have a son_ "

Without even processing that he was speaking aloud the words slipped from between Lucas' lips "I don't understand"

Their eyes didn't break from each other, she let it slip out "I lied to you in junior year when I said I wasn't pregnant and when I went to my parents that summer I gave birth to a baby boy that I gave up for adoption or I-"

Lucas' expression changed, he no longer looked like the man Brooke knew, an unknown look pierced her to the spot as Luke banged the table with his fist stopping her mid-sentence "stop it" he gritted "you weren't pregnant"

Tears beginning to build at the corner of her eyes Brooke simply nodded to say she had been.

In disbelief Lucas shook his head "I would have known if you were pregnant, you must have been-"

"Five months" she whispered, Brooke didn't know why a stupid laugh escaped as a tear rolled down her cheek "I was barely showing, I lost like fifteen pounds the first trimester"

A part of Lucas wanted to believe Brooke was lying yet he knew she wouldn't do that, not now not after so many years. At the same time he wondered why she was choosing now to tell him something that would only cause pain.

A son. A little boy he'd never known and never will know. Lucas did the maths and realised the baby would have to be six by now. Lucas was in pain, he could feel the need to cry, the need to rage, his whole body felt like it was on fire, "why are you telling me this now?" he stood as he yelled the words, the chair falling with a bang.

Brooke jumped. If there was one thing she never thought Lucas would make her feel it was scared of him though now Brooke wasn't so certain any more. She stumbled over the words "I'm sorry, Luke. I never meant for you to find out like this"

"Sorry doesn't cut it and how'd you expect me to find out?" he shook his head still unable to really put everything together and what it all meant. Lucas had woken up knowing his life and now he felt like everything was a lie, the ground had gone out from under him. Her big eyes appeared black with how large the pupils were, Brooke looked so vulnerable and it kicked him in the guts. A vulnerable Brooke held a beauty, so open and he'd thought honest but looking at her now Lucas couldn't fathom how she'd kept this from him. There was something else Luke noticed, "you didn't" he answered his own question.

"I thought it would be easier that way, it wouldn't hurt you if you didn't know" more whispers. A simple plan Brooke had always thought, she could carry the knowledge and the pain, the ache that something was forever missing.

It kept circling in Lucas' head, _a son, a son, a son_. Unable to look at Brooke Lucas turned his back on her.

While his back was turned Brooke slipped the envelope from her purse and slid it across the table, she had anticipated that a conversation wouldn't allow a chance for everything to be said and had prepared for it, ready to go and give Lucas some time Brooke took a step back "I wrote you a letter, it explains everything. When you're ready you can find me" her words hung between them. Lucas didn't move and didn't speak so Brooke quickly left.

In the distance Lucas heard the door close; he turned his head to the side yet caught no glimpse of her. Slowly turning Lucas eyed the letter and then gave in and picked the chair up to take a seat again. Opening the envelope he pulled the letter out not sure if he was ready.

 _Lucas,_

 _I can't explain fully why I lied to you but I do know that once I came back after the summer I knew it was too late to tell you the truth then. Do you remember telling me that you had wanted to be older and in love when you became a dad? You told me you would be there for me no matter what I chose. This was my choice. I guess you wanted to comfort me and not scare me but you did. I'm not saying it was your fault. I thought long and hard. We didn't have the best childhood. I know you had Karen and Keith, and I can't imagine two better parents but even you know what a hole it left not having a real family You know what I mean, a Mom and Dad to love and protect you. That picture perfect family. I guess when I thought of what I wanted for our baby I wanted better than what we had. Lucas, I loved him so much before he was even born and I knew you would too. Loving him wouldn't be a problem._

 _You threw me for a loop when you told me you wanted to be with me again before I left. I knew I was leaving to give our baby away. I didn't even know if I would even be able to come back. I wanted to tell you then but it had been so long, what would we have done, what would it change. Well we couldn't make it so I guess it was best the baby wasn't in the middle of that. I did think about what if, all the time, but I kept strong knowing he was loved and safe. It's not an excuse but after the parents I had I didn't know what a family was. I had a dream and I tried to make it a reality for the life we created together._

 _I thought I did everything right, I thought I was doing the selfless thing. There were so many couples wanting to adopt and I made sure to look for the best. That's all I wanted, the best for him. I found them, they lived on this huge property, they had money but they were real, you know, real people who just wanted to love. The mom was going to stay at home with the baby. The dad was a little dorky but sweet. Thinking about the family our son would have got me through the doubts. It got me through a lot of dark days._

 _It wasn't an easy pregnancy. I had trouble gaining weight and six weeks before my due date I was induced and gave birth to a small but loud little boy. It was August the 23_ _rd_ _and I will never forget it. I never saw him, I never touched his skin. It was the hardest day of my life. On the outside I tried to forget it had happened because I wasn't sure how I would survive otherwise. Inside I carried my baby around with me._

 _The truth is I never planned to tell you. I had this aching pain inside me and I thought I was protecting you and your future by keeping the pain inside me only. That probably sounds stupid but it's true. It doesn't change anything and I expect you will be mad, confused, broken. Just know I didn't do it to hurt you._

 _My secret was never meant to come out, not because I was ashamed but because I thought I was protecting everyone. And that brings me to now and why it's changed._

 _When I tried to foster Sam I found out that they couldn't approve me because to my shock I had a child in the system. My world turned upside down. My son was meant to be safe and loved. I told myself there had to be a mistake._

 _I have since found out that the couple that was meant to adopt Noah, that's our son, Noah. The couple cancelled the adoption when they found out they were having their own baby. Instead of telling me Victoria orchestrated for the truth to be kept from me so I wouldn't keep the baby and instead of being adopted Noah was placed in the foster care system._

 _If I had known I would have never let it happen and I can't keep him there Lucas. I know that this changes things, hell it changes everything. And it's the worse time to bring the past up for you and Peyton. But I'm getting our son back. I will move mountains to make sure he gets the love he deserves. I can give him that love and a home._

 _It's not the white picket fence I dreamt for Noah all those years ago and I can't go back and change what happened but I know when I bring Noah home to his family he will be loved by all of us._

 _I'm not asking for forgiveness. I'm asking for the support you promised me back then. And you to open your heart to a little boy who needs us._

The letter wasn't signed.

Unable to move Lucas sat there at the table, the letter in his hand staring at the handwriting until the words were just a blur. It didn't matter, he didn't need to read it again, Lucas was lost on his thoughts, lost in a past full of memories. Everything came back to him, he analysed it, went over it all, trying to figure out when things changed, if there was anything he missed that should have revealed the truth.

Time disappeared, Lucas had no idea what the hour was, yet he stood and moved, racing to his car he drove with purpose until he was in front of the same door he'd knocked on just yesterday morning.

Yesterday was a whole lifetime ago.

And then the door opened and two words fell out of his mouth.

"I'm here"

-x-

 **Next chapter: I had to do it, I needed the reveal Brooke has already waited too long and I needed it to be Lucas. It's bad enough Julian found out first but for his sake I couldn't have anyone else find out before he did. It's was hard to do the time this one, I wanted to show the weekend and time moving but without following every single thing.. I hope it wasn't too choppy.**

 **Hugs,**

 **Mickei.**


	6. Chapter 6

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting. I do own a startling amount of One Tree Hill DVDS which my sister keeps nagging me for at least one set but I've refused to give One Tree Hill to someone who doesn't appreciate BL. She was a horrible child but has grown into a great woman I don't know what went wrong, I like to think it's not her fault she is a leytoner, Mum did smoke when she was pregnant with her.**

 _Author note: Thanks to those who reviewed, followed and favourited the story. Don't forget to follow so you don't miss updates._

 _This feels like forever. A lot of it is on me, I struggled with this chapter. It's just so dialogue heavy that getting the flow was a bit tricky and I'm still not happy. It's not ended where I wanted but I thought I would cut the scenes in my head into two chapters instead._

 _In reply to my reviews, thanks to diane, the guests reviews, callison, brucas, tania k, new to brooke, mary c, for taking the time to review. I'm glad the newbies found the story and are enjoying it, thabks for the feedback and love._

 _Now onto…_

Chapter Six

Tears running down her face Brooke slammed the door behind her in frustration at herself, shoulders shaking she went straight to her room to have a hot shower until her skin was red and there were no tears left in her body. Face pale and eyes puffy Brooke dressed in comfort clothes and had just dropped down on the couch when there was a knock on the door.

The last thing Brooke wanted was visitors yet she reluctantly got up and opened the door, stunned to see a dishevelled Lucas standing tall on the other side.

"I'm here"

For a second Brooke couldn't speak as they just stared at each other, blue eyes on hazel, she released her breath and stepped back holding the door open, "come in"

Unlike all the times they'd sat together side by side on the couch, or talking over the kitchen counter, this time the two of them went to sit opposite of each other at the dining table, hands on the table. Though there was so much to say neither Brooke nor Lucas spoke, the words lost between them.

Unable to meet his eyes Brooke found herself observing the lines of her own hands while she could feel Lucas' gaze burning into her.

The ticking of a clock seemed to get louder and louder taking over the whole room and every other sound, it was like a loud crack when Lucas finally managed to speak, his voice a croak, "I… I still feel like this is some sort of dream, it doesn't feel _real_ " suddenly unable to stay still Lucas started to fidget, leaning forward, "I don't understand how you could not tell me. Everything we meant to each other, all these years and you never said a word" he shook his head and lowered his face into his hands looking smaller and weaker than Brooke had ever seen him.

Brooke couldn't answer, she was frozen knowing no apology or explanation could fully explain everything. After six years of silence Brooke decided a few more minutes to let Lucas process it all wouldn't hurt.

He sighed, "What happens now?" Lucas asked, looking to Brooke

Trying to appear as collected as she could while inside she was falling apart Brooke tried to meet Lucas' eyes, "I'm bringing Noah home next week"

"I'm guessing you haven't been going to New York for business?" Lucas' words came out in a humourous huff, he rolled his eyes and straight away became serious again "so… what do I have to do?"

Brooke had to stop herself from shrugging and as her silence lingered Lucas' eyes widened, finally Brooke stumbled "I don't know… be a… dad"

"But what does that even mean. Look Brooke, how is this going to work… logistically? Am I going to be a every second weekend dad or-"

"Hang on. If or when Noah goes to yours for weekends-"

" _If?_ So you tell me I have a kid, you want me to be there, to be _a dad_ but it's a no to actually acting like a dad and looking after my son. I'm going to need your permission-"

Brooke quickly cut in again, her hands up in defence "It's not like that. I _know_ I am the one who has put us in this situation and I'm not trying to push you out but I am thinking of Noah. His whole world is changing and getting use to one new home is hard enough, I just think it's best if Noah gets comfortable here before introducing a second home. I don't mean you don't get to be a dad, you _are_ his dad, it's just he can't go back and forth right now, he needs one stable home and bed"

"And who says that home has to be with you?" eyes hard Lucas stared right at Brooke as his words sunk in.

It was a kick in the guts, Brooke physically repelled from the words, beneath the shock a slow fear and anger boiled to the surface.

"Maybe we need to take a break, talk about Noah tomorrow" her words were slow and careful. Neither one blinked until Lucas sat back in the chair, Brooke sighed and tried to relax "I'm looking at three schools this week if you want to come with me? I can text you the details"

"Okay"

"I'm leaving on Wednesday, we will be coming back to Tree Hill on Monday-"

Lucas was quick to cut in "I'm coming too" he was firm and Brooke nodded.

With a tight smile Brooke looked at Lucas with reserved emotion, "I'll organise a seat on the plane for you" and then she closed her mouth, her eyes speaking volumes as they stared at each other. Lucas stood understanding they weren't going to get any further that night, he was too raw.

Not following him Brooke waited until Lucas was at the door before she stood with her back still to him. She heard the click of the door handle as Lucas opened it though there was no sound of it closing; Brooke sucked in a breath and waited.

Lucas turned back and stared at Brooke, the words were on the tip of his tongue, his glare was like daggers digging into her back and as Lucas watched the fall of her shoulders he lost his voice. _I don't know how to look at you. I don't know how to think of you. Everything I thought I knew has been turned upside down. You were meant to be my friend, you were meant to be something more than that, someone I could trust. I don't know how to forgive you. I don't know if I ever can._

There was a resigned sigh, Lucas stepped forward and closed the door behind him. There was just an emptiness between them, a gaping void that had grown with each second since Brooke had dropped her bomb.

Still unable to process everything Lucas drove around the town until time lost all meaning, it had long gone dark when Lucas walked through his front door head bowed.

After hearing the sound of the door Peyton walked into the room with a huge grin, "hey, stranger, where have you been? You missed dinner" she went to kiss Lucas on his lips though he pushed her away, solemn and distracted.

Peyton's eyes flickered and her shoulders slumped, confused Peyton followed Lucas as he walked through the house into the kitchen.

"Sorry, I had some things to do" Lucas mumbled.

"You okay, Luke?"

"Not really" he took a breath and turned to look at Peyton "I need you to sit down"

Peyton gave a little laugh before she sat sideways on the chair, her chin lifted to keep eyes on Lucas "what's going on?"

Lucas remained standing, his back leant against the kitchen counter, hands holding the edge behind him "Brooke came to see me today. I found out why she's been acting so weird lately"

"It's because of the baby isn't it" there was a knowing tone in Peyton's voice, she shook her head "I-"

Before Peyton could go further Lucas stopped her, his hands spread out between them, he gave a quick shake of his head eyes closed for a brief moment "No, it's not what you think" he tried to relax "I don't know how to do this. She gave me this letter" he pulled it from his pocket and handed it to Peyton, taking a seat next to her.

It was only a few seconds before Peyton frowned, "what is this?"

"Keep reading, read it all"

Seconds passed, Peyton's frown turned to more confusion, she shifted in the seat. _Our baby_ she mouthed, and soon Peyton was holding a hand over her mouth as she kept reading. It was like a car wreck and Peyton couldn't look away and stop reading as much as she wanted to stop. When it was over Peyton read it again, more carefully and slower.

Finally after nearly twenty minutes of looking at the letter Peyton faced Lucas, her green eyes gleamed with unshed tears, "Brooke had your baby?" she asked, "how come I never knew any of this?"

"I didn't know"

"But… it's…" Peyton dropped in a sudden move as if the letter had burnt her fingers, "I just can't believe I wouldn't _know_ " then she looked at Lucas with accusation, "that _you_ didn't know any of this, how could you not know?"

"Because she never told me" voice raised slightly.

"But you dated her after that" a look of disgust crossed Peyton's face, "you had sex with her!"

"Look, _I didn't know!_ " Lucas yelled scooted closer to Peyton who stood to move away. The couple stared at each other, breathing heavily until Peyton looked away.

With a calmer yet shaky voice Peyton replied "I just don't know how to react to this"

Lucas sighed, "me either, Peyton. When I woke up this morning I really didn't expect for one of our best friends to tell me I have a six year old"

A light appeared in Peyton's eyes, "are we sure it's really true?"

The look Lucas gave her clearly expressed his opinion on that, he shook his head "what would be the point"

"I don't know" Peyton lifted and then dropped her hands; her voiced screeched "maybe she is wrong then. This is Brooke, _Brooke_ , can we know that this kid is actually even yours?" her eyes widened in defence at the suggestion "I'm just saying, I love Brooke but we all know what she use to be like" Peyton had begun pacing the room, talking to herself now, "this is unbelievable"

A sound came from Lucas, Peyton looked up to meet his eyes again and quickly rushed to him, wrapping her arms around her fiancé and resting her head on his shoulder, "oh, Luke".

-x-

It was with nervous anticipation that Brooke led Carine through her house, it was now spotless and child proof. Carine made notes and Brooke twisted her fingers together as she answered the other woman's questions.

Opening the door to the room near hers Brooke stepped in before Carine and motioned to the room, "this is Noah's room".

The walls were painted dark blue, colourful photo frames filled one wall with various artworks of wildlife, landscapes and outer space, below them a dark bookshelf stood a metre high that ran all along the wall and continued around the corner along the far wall with the window. The bottom shelf had colourful boxes, some filled with toys and pieces for Noah that Brooke had gotten for his room, the other shelves were mainly bare for now and had the books she had bought him as well as some ornaments. The other corner by the window had a comfy large recliner Brooke imagined Noah could read in, she had placed a fluffy red blanket over the back of it, and a basketball shaped cushion as well. In the middle of the room Brooke had placed a round mat on the floor with a map of the world on it, it was one of her favourite finds for Noah.

The bunk beds rested against the left wall, each with grey sheets and matching colourful striped comforters. Next to the door stood the built in wardrobe and a desk with a yellow computer set up for Noah. The final touch Brooke had done to make the room comfortable for Noah was the glow in the dark stars she placed on the white roof.

Carine walked around the room, pulling open a few boxes and drawers. Brooke had tried not to buy too many clothes for Noah yet it had been hard to resist, though Brooke wanted Noah to pick out his own clothes she had chosen carefully enough items that she could go at least a week without washing any, hoping Noah could wear something that didn't resemble a school uniform so much.

Next Brooke took Carine upstairs to Sam's room; it resembled a teenager's room more so now, again Carine carefully went through the space. Once they were back down stairs Carine smiled at Brooke, "I hope you're free this afternoon to pick Sam up from school and bring her home"

With a squeal Brooke hugged Carine, "thank you, thank you, thank you"

Carine laughed as they separated, "you're welcome"

The moment was broken by a sudden knock on the door, the consecutive bangs angry and loud next to the cheer of the room. Though it was with a grin Brooke walked away from Carine to answer her door, she was still wearing a smile when she opened the door and felt the immediate sting on her cheek.

The hand had risen automatically, slapping Brooke across the face. Peyton red faced and looking furious stood on the other side of the door, eyes glaring.

Brooke had not understood what was happening at first, it wasn't until her palm covered her now burning cheek that her vision cleared and Brooke realised what had happened. Resisting the urge to drop her mouth the shock had left Brooke, she immediately tightened her jaw, straightened her shoulders and faced Peyton.

The blonde looked as if she was about to burst into the house yet she remained fixed to the front porch, with the same hand that had slapped Brooke, Peyton raised her finger and pointed it at Brooke's face, "you've done it this time. You selfish bitch! You can stay the fuck away from me" and dropped her finger, with a last huff Peyton turned and stormed away leaving a stunned Brooke to close the door and with a pale face, stained cheek, turned back to face Carine.

A perplexed look graced Carine's face and Brooke gave her an apologetic look, "I'm sorry"

"No, I'm sorry, are you okay? Is that… normal?"

Brooke wasn't sure where the concern came from, as a woman or as a professional. With her back to the door Brooke was contrite, "my best friend" Brooke shrugged, "she's pregnant, hormonal, and I'm guessing just found out that her fiancé has a six year old son he didn't know about until yesterday"

A look of comprehension crossed Carine's face, "oh" then it widened, "oh, wow" she tried to pretend that she wasn't curious about the situation and put on her best down to business face, "well we are all good here, so I will leave you to do things and get all the paperwork into the system. Good to see you again Brooke"

After ushering Carine out Brooke closed the door again and slid down the hard surface to slump on the floor, eyes closed.

-x-

At the end of the school day Sam leant against a large tree, book in hand, dark hair tied in a long side pony. Bored expression on show Sam was surprised when Haley stopped next to her, "Hi Sam, what are you still doing here?"

"Brooke told me to wait here for her, maybe she forgot" her tongue clicked, her dark eyes rolled though Sam straightened up and closed her book to face Haley, "you want to give a snarky teenager a lift back to her jail cell?"

"You make a very tempting offer" Haley replied sarcastically, she then smiled, "would you like me to wait with- Oh here's Brooke now"

Haley noticed that Brooke was avoiding meeting her eyes as she hopped out of the car and hugged Sam, "you're coming home!" Brooke buried her head in Sam's shoulder immediately.

Sam clung onto Brooke, trying to remain cool yet a tear escaped. Brooke leaned back and cupped the teenagers face "it's all going to be okay now"

On the sidelines Haley watched the scene, she was happy for both her friend Brooke and for Sam, "that's great" she told them and hugged Sam once the girl stepped back from Brooke.

Still smiling Haley hugged Brooke next and noticed after she pulled away that Brooke's eyes wouldn't look at her directly, "everything okay?"

Usually Brooke was direct, hard to ignore, Haley instantly knew something wasn't right.

"Sure, sure" Brooke pulled Sam to her side, "just can't wait to take Sam home to celebrate. I'll talk to you some other time" Brooke started to pull Sam towards the car "come on, Sam, let's go. Bye Haley!" the farewell was done casually, a wave with her back to the teacher.

In the car Sam watched Brooke, a careful look on her face and they didn't speak until they got back to Brooke's house. Sam dropped her bag and ran up the stairs "checking out my new room"

"WALK!"

"Whatever" Sam screamed back and laughing Brooked followed, stopping in the doorway, arms folded to watch Sam jump on her bed.

"You like?"

Sam grinned "I love" then rolled off the bed to quickly look out the window before spinning to Brooke "what no bars?" brow kinked.

"That can be arranged missy"

"I like a challenge" she wiggled her brows, "I'm betting it'll take me about two minutes to get you to cave and tell me what's going on – uh uh- I know something is up, you have been all secretive and weird and you _totally_ blew Haley off"

Brooke held her tongue and then stepped forward, after a big sigh Brooke nodded "you're completely right. There is something that I've been trying to figure out how to tell you, to tell everyone really. It's a part of the reason why you couldn't be in my care"

"You're a felon! I knew it" Sam laughed her face lighting up.

With a roll of the eyes Brooke went and sat on the bed, looking over her shoulder she patted the bed for Sam. The teenager was slow in joining Brooke and plopped onto the bed.

"All joking aside, I need you to listen to me and know that nothing changes how I feel about you and how much I love you"

"Are you dying?" Sam cut in though Brooke heard the nerves in her young voice as Sam started to realise how serious the situation was.

It was with hope that Brooke placed her hand over Sam's, hope for the future, and she began to tell her story again "when I was a junior I wasn't in a good place in my life, especially emotionally, I put on this show but I was really insecure and my relationship with my parents didn't go further than a credit card. I acted out, tried to find validation by sleeping around, and then… well" Brooke sighed, she looked up at the ceiling before gazing down at where her hand still covered Sam's, "I got a reality check. I started to fall in love which inevitably was followed by getting my heart broken, I found out I was pregnant not long after" as soon as the words were out Sam's eyes widened, Brooke paused and then continued "I didn't tell anyone and managed to hide it. My dad ended up losing his job and then my parents moved to California, I stayed here to finish the school year. I thought my secret would come out but it wasn't until the summer when I went to stay with my parents that I finally told my Mom-"

"Hang on" Sam snatched her hand away and stood quickly, the teenager stared at Brooke with large eyes on the brink of crying, arms wrapped around her body, "you have a kid? That's where this is going right?" she swore.

Brooke flinched, "he is six" she held in the tears, her throat began to itch, "I didn't think I was good enough to be a someone's mom back then so I-"

"Threw him away!" Sam screamed and Brooke quickly stood to reach for Sam. The girl stepped back and flung her arms away from Brooke's touch.

"NO!" Brooke begged, "I loved him more than anything, I just wanted him to have more than I could give him"

"Right, because little miss money bags was going to struggle" Sam's voice was poison and she left the room and went down the stairs.

Behind the teenager Brooke followed, "it wasn't like that. The money was my parents and they didn't even want me to have the baby, besides it wasn't just about money it was about giving him a proper family" starting to get out of breath Brooke paused at the landing of the staircase, slightly amazed at how fast Sam could move.

"It's okay, I get it, you're just like everyone else" Sam shook her head and before Brooke could say anything the girl had left the house. By the time Brooke got to the bottom of her porch steps she heard the engine of her car starting, starting to run Brooke chased the reversing vehicle, "SAM! SAM!" she banged against the bonnet, the gears shifted and Sam straightened up on the main road, foot pressed on the accelerator.

"That went well" Brooke muttered sarcastically to herself as her own car vanished in the distance.

-x-

There was the sound of a child's laughter filling the house when Peyton opened the door, her face blank, the glow out of her eyes.

In the living room Peyton found Lucas and Jamie playing guitar hero, "hi, what's this?" she tried to smile but it didn't reach her eyes.

Lucas patted Jamie's dark blonde hair "just watching Jamie for Nathan and Haley, they've invited us over for dinner tonight too" he saw her jaw drop, and whispered to Jamie that he would be back.

The couple walked into the kitchen together, "is that really a good idea?" Peyton asked straight away.

He shrugged, "am I meant to just pause everything?"

"I expect you to act like" Peyton huffed, "I don't know, like this isn't any other day! Why aren't you angry-"

"Because maybe I'm not that angry!" Lucas cut in frustrated, he gave a laugh "I just found out I have a son" he looked at her harder, "a _son_ not the plague, I don't want to spend all my time focusing on the anger"

"So you're not angry, you are just totally fine with Brooke dropping this bombshell because I'm not, I am not okay with this, I am not okay-" Lucas stopped Peyton, grabbing his fiancée by her wrist and lowering them, her voice calmed "she was my best friend"

"She still is"

Peyton lifted her eyes to look at him, disbelief on her face, the green depths bluer than normal "right, that's something that is on pause" her tone dry Peyton turned back around and moved the canisters on the kitchen counter around, "besides I went to see her today"

"Peyton" he groaned. After running a hand over his face Lucas watched Peyton turn back, a guilty expression on her face, "what did you do?"

She casually shrugged, "I just told her to leave me alone"

"And…"

"Okay maybe I slapped her"

A sigh escaped Lucas though he couldn't lie to himself that he hadn't expected a larger reaction from his girlfriend, "Peyton! You cannot slap Brooke. Other than the fact its _Brooke_ I need you to not do anything to make this situation worse, antagonising Brooke is not what I want right now as she is the one in control at the moment"

"Fine, I'm sorry" her words were rushed and insincere.

"Just stay away from Brooke for a while" he held her hands, swinging them between them.

Peyton smiled, "good idea, let's stay away from Brooke"

Lucas coughed and turned around, "I'm going to take Jamie out, you want to come?"

"No"

After Peyton's short reply Lucas left the kitchen almost knocking into Jamie around the corner, "hey Jimmy-Jam, what are you doing?"

The boy frowned, "looking for you"

"Sorry, how about we go to the park and get out of this joint?"

Jamie jumped up and down, "yes" he pumped his fist.

Though Lucas grinned his stomach dropped, Jamie quickly went to his normal cheery self though Lucas wondered if the famously big eared boy had heard anything he shouldn't have. _Great, another thing on my worry list._

-x-

With every second Brooke grew more and more worried, a million and one thoughts running through her head. Phone to her ear she tried not to scream and knew she was failing, "No, I've already called Jack and he hasn't seen her" her voice sounding more frantic, "of course I checked there!... yes" Brooke could have sworn every bad word she knew though she kept it in, her mind changing thoughts she ignored the suggestion given "I'm going to check the diner… no a different one, she use to always go to a different one it's worth a try"

Julian tried to calm Brooke down but the young mother had reached the end of patience, her mind was all over her place, her skin felt like it was burning up. For a moment she listened to Julian's instruction's to relax and Brooke took a deep breath, "thanks Julian. Yes, 'll stay here, see you soon"

Ten minutes later Julian pulled up and Brooke hopped into the car, "I owe you for this"

"Careful Brooke, you're fast getting into debt. I'll own you top to toe soon"

Brooke sucked in a breath, hand on her seat belt Brooke took a moment to actually relax and kinked her brow, "trust me, I'm worth more than you can afford" and after the words left her lips Brooke's seatbelt clicked into place.

The rest of the drive was silence except for Brooke's directions and before either one knew it they were parking and Brooke bounded out of the car freezing as she turned to look inside the diner. Through the glass windows Brooke saw Sam sitting alone at a table, a coffee in front of her yet the teenager's face was down staring blankly at where she was stirring the spoon over and over again.

She didn't remember moving or how exactly she found herself standing across from Sam, Brooke silently sat, her heart pounding inside her chest. Sam didn't look up yet the way she froze let them both know they were aware of the moment.

"Come home, Sam"

Finally Sam looked up, her fingers still on the now motionless spoon and her eyes bright red, her voice shaking the teenager looked younger than her years "what makes you any different from her?" and she jerked her shoulder subtly.

Brooke didn't take her eyes from Sam, she knew who Sam was talking about, she knew what she had in common with the waitress in the corner - Sam's biological mother.

" _I'm here for you_ " Brooke placed all her love and care into her voice, "I'm here asking you to come home, I want you, I love you and I will fight for you. And I'm doing the same thing for my son"

A light returned in Sam's brown eyes and Brooke let a little of her worry leave her and smiled "I need you Sam. I can't say I won't suck at this Mom thing-"

"You do alright" Sam licked her lips.

The two brunettes smiled at each other and then Sam pushed her drink away, "the coffee sucks here"

"Let's go somewhere else then, anywhere you want to go"

Sam stood, "I want to go home"

Inside Brooke was filled with joy though on the outside she remained calm, "let's go then" and the two of them walked out arm in arm.

Julian welcomed them, "you almost gave us heart attacks" he frowned at Sam, "but I'm glad you're alright"

"Yeah old age does that" Sam rolled her eyes, "but I'm glad to know you were so concerned, Julian to the rescue again huh or is this just another _work_ thing?"

Brooke pinched Sam's arm and pulled her towards their car, "I see you're back to normal already, let's just remember you stole my car and drove it without a license so let's keep the snark to a minimum until I figure out if I should ground you"

"Hey I was like emotionally scarred by your teen drama, cut me some slack" Sam put her hands on her heart.

Ignoring Sam for a moment Brooke gave her thanks to Julian and said goodbye, he messed Sam's hair up as he replied "I'll follow you home"

"Because that doesn't sound stalkery _at all"_ Sam shook her head, "how bout you take Brooke home before we need a restraining order and I'll take the other-"

"No" Brooke pulled Sam further away "I don't think so. Bye, Julian. Say bye, Sam"

Sam laughed as her foster mother dragged her away and only played around for a few minutes before giving Brooke her keys back. Once they were driving Sam wiped her eyes and quickly tied her hair back, she felt better though her face still felt slightly stiff from her earlier crying.

"So… when is the other kid coming?"

"Next week" Brooke smiles, "did I tell you his name is Noah, he's so smart and cute, Noah is like a serious and lanky version of Jamie"

Sam relaxed in the passenger seat facing Brooke, she gave a little cough "well that'll be awkward, don't tell me you hooked up with Nathan too? I'm not sure how Jamie will feel about being a little brother" and she laughed at her own joke.

Hands tight on the steering wheel Brooke kept her eyes forward and Sa, suddenly stopped laughing, "Brooke?" she stretched the name out, "did you hook up with Nathan?"

"No!" Brooke's voice was high, "well, yes but that's not the point, Nathan was a slut in high school and we've all been there and done him at least once but no just no, _ew,_ I love Nathan like a brother he's not-"

"Your baby daddy?"

Brooke sighed, she was tired, so tired, and wondered if teenagers were more exhausting than little kids or if Sam was special in this area.

"I wish you wouldn't say it like that. This whole situation is already very… uh… delicate and around me I don't mind so much but this affects other people too and they might not find you so-"

"Charming?"

"I was going to say adorably funny but Sam this is serious" Brooke stopped at a red light and looked to Sam, "a lot of people are most likely going to be very angry at me, it hasn't been the best timing and you might hear things, the others might take a step back from us for a while"

"Like who?"

"Like Haley and Nathan, Peyton and Mia"

"But why? They're my friends, they're your friends" her face was crinkled in doubt, Sam couldn't see how they would be angry at Brooke for something that had nothing to do with them…. Sam straightened suddenly, "OH MY GOD!" she stared at Brooke and then swore, "FUCK IT'S LUCAS!"

Clearing her throat Brooke turned the corner, her neck a little stiff, "this is what I mean about being a little bit more sensitive in your delivery"

"Holy cow!" Sam sat back down, "I kinda feel sorry for you. Peyton's great but I've seen her get her bitch on, I would not want to be you when she finds out. Do you think you two will catfight?" Sam shrugged thinking about it, "my money's on you"

"I'm not fighting Peyton"

Sam kept talking, "this is going to make you being the maid of honour so awkward, award for most weird wedding party ever"

Brooke gulped and quickly stopped Sam saying anything else "okay" her voice was too high and tight, "changing subject"

"We could talk about Julian if you prefer?"

Not biting Brooke tightened her hands on the steering will, "how was school today?"

-x-

 **I must admit I kinda like writing Sam and Brooke and having Sam torture Brooke. I just can't keep them down.**

 **So… what do you think about the Peyton reveal and how Peyton and Lucas are reacting? OOC or pretty reasonable?**

 **How do you envision other's would react? More reactions next chapter.**

 **Anyway it's nearly midnight here and I better sleep while I can before my kid wakes up.**


	7. Wake Me Up

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting. I do own a Keith Scott hoodie.**

 _Author note: I would like to thank those who reviewed and subscribed, reviews really do help with the inspiration to write and post. I'm not sure if I replied privately this time so I will include all review replies, all come with huge thanks._

 _Diane: there's def going to be diff pieces of everyone with everyone in this story but you know where my heart lies, never say never ;)_

 _Knyaa.c: I'm curious to know what you think of this chapter. Hopefully the wait won't be as long aymore though I will be taking turns updating this fic and my other one._

 _Callison: That's a relief because it wasn't how I originally planned it so I appreciate that you enjoyed the final reaction. I love writing Sam/Brooke. I can't wiat for Noah to be here as well, I keep thinking it'll be soon and then another chapter pops up between it._

 _Murray889: I'm glad you are loving it and their relationship I def enjoy writing that. Sam and Brooke were one of my favourite things about season 6 if not my favourite thing about it all together._

 _Guest: I love Peyton but she has an undeniable selfish streak, though I think in her situation any woman would be a bit unnerved. You guys are my muse half the time. I can totes be guilted into writing lol._

 _Bjq: I feel like it wasn't that long ago but it was over a month damn time goes fast._

 _Guest: I love a good bl fight so they will def have there darker moments. And their close ones._

 _k-pixy: enjoy the update, I love hearing that others love reading the fic._

 _PS there is swearing in this chapter, and probably will continue through the fic. I just think it's unrealistic there wouldn't be and if it wasn't for the rating of the show there would def be more than just a few slurs like bitch. Some moments just need that oomph of emotion, and even for an Australian I swear a lot so expect a few f bombs._

 _Here's to…_

Chapter Seven

Hand in hand Lucas walked with Jamie, the small boy's grip a comfortable warmth that had Lucas' thoughts going down a different path. Walking towards the door, Lucas watched Jamie's light head by his side and wondered about the other little boy out there, the son he had never met. Instead of throwing his anger at Brooke he now wished that he had asked to see a photo of Noah, Lucas regretted not asking more about his son. The gears inside Lucas' head were clicking into place finding acceptance with the idea he was now a father.

As they got closer to the door Jamie let go of his hand and left Lucas behind to run the rest of the way, knocking on the door with enthusiastic bangs. Haley had already started to open it by the time Lucas reached his nephew, "hi, Hales"

"Luke, you're a bit later than we expected, I was worried Jamie might have been kidnapped again" Haley joked and pinched Jamie's cheeks "he's so damn cute everyone wants to keep him"

"M _om_!"

Lucas buried his hands in his pockets, "we were just having a good time and lost track of things"

"Well, come in, I'll tell Nathan to start cooking the meat" Haley was all smiles and swung Jamie up into her arms for a spontaneous hug as they walked through the entry.

Jamie quickly escaped Haley's embrace and ran off leaving Haley and Lucas to walk side by side, they were both exhausted. Haley's shoulders sagged as she picked up a few of Jamie's toys as they walked through the house, "so how you been Luke?" she looked over her shoulder.

Walking now slightly behind her Lucas dawdled, "I… have been better. Things are a bit crazy at the moment"

Out of the blue Nathan came from around the corner, "hormones?" he questioned and stepped around Haley to give his older brother a hug, their right hands connected as they pulled themselves together, patting each other on the back with the other hand before stepping back and letting go of each other. It took two seconds and the brothers fell back into step, the three of them turning into the kitchen.

"Where's Jamie?" Nathan asked. Haley answered unsure and the young father raised his voice, "JAMIE SCOTT GET OUT HERE"

Soon the five year old came running in and the family fell into familiar roles, Lucas helping Haley start the salads while Nathan and Jamie cooked the meat.

"Please go set the table" Haley instructed Jamie and the boy quickly went off, Haley eyed Lucas from the side as soon as the adults were alone again, "so what's really going on?"

Lucas shrugged and Nathan looked between his brother and wife.

With a knowing smile Haley shook her head, "come on, Luke, I know that look. Something is going on in that big head of yours, I see wheels turning" and she pointed her knife in his direction. Lucas handed her his bowl and gave a little nervous laugh.

"Hales is right, you look like shit man" Nathan put in his two cents.

Jamie came running back in, "I'm done, Mama"

Giving a meaningful nudge towards his nephew Lucas replied to the others, "I'll explain later"

The furtive looks were still being exchanged as they all sat down at the dining table, the food spread out in front of them, "where's Peyton?" Nathan asked once they were all seated.

"She had some things to do" Lucas cleared his throat awkwardly, trying to act normal as he filled his plate.

Jamie gave a little glare to Lucas which his parents saw, "you alright buddy?" Nathan asked.

The little boy's expression was thoughtful, "I heard Peyton tell Uncle Lucas she slapped Aunt Brooke"

Mouth immediately dropping Haley looked to Lucas who stopped mid wince, "I'm sure you must have misheard her" at the same time Nathan gave a low whistle. When Lucas didn't say anything Haley put on a wide stiff smile and piled more food on Jamie's plate, "you know, sometimes friends have little disagreements"

"But Mama you told me we should use our words not our hands-"

"Jamie eat your dinner"

They fell into an awkward silence and when Nathan finally changed the subject there was an unspoken undercurrent to the conversation.

As soon as they were done Haley started collecting dishes and Lucas jumped to help her, as soon as they were alone at the sink Haley whispered, "what's going on?"

"A lot"

"I knew something was wrong, Brooke has been acting so secretive lately, please tell me you're not in the middle of this?" there was a warning tone in her voice and the look on Lucas' face gave her no confidence. The blonde author was silent, his face had become stiff and pale. Haley suddenly grabbed the tea towel and whacked Lucas across the chest before placing her hands on her hips and sighing. Disappointed the woman stared at Lucas, hands still on her hips, her voice a quiet hiss "has something happened between you and Brooke?"

"It's not like that, I'm not sixteen anymore Haley" and he relaxed as Haley's body became less defensive, "I'm going to be as honest as I can-" and Lucas placed his hands on his friends shoulders before continuing, "if you want I can tell you but I'm going to suggest that you go talk to Brooke instead"

Though her eyes narrowed Haley didn't say anything else, she left the kitchen and Lucas let out a breath. Haley took Lucas' advice, ushering Jamie upstairs to get ready for bed and then grabbing her jacket and saying goodbye to her husband and brother in law. It hit Lucas as her heard Haley's car leave that the next time he saw his best friend she would know about the baby, even as he thought it Lucas corrected himself, she would know about Noah.

With perfect timing Lucas felt his phone vibrate and checked the message, it was from Brooke giving him the details about the school tours the next day. Lucas replied he would pick her up from her place and then quickly slipped his phone back into his pocket.

Alone the two brothers went outside with a couple of cold beers, leaning against the rail in a similar stance Nathan and Lucas each fell into a comfortable silence as they began to drink.

After nearly five minutes their eyes met, Nathan gave Lucas a look and Lucas tilted his head which Nathan gave a nod to and then after a few more sips Lucas straightened up. Nathan followed suit and sent Lucas a raised eyebrow. The brothers were silently communicating, when Lucas was ready he gave a nod and his cheek dimpled as he squeezed his beer bottle in his hand and let the words out "I have a son"

Nathan's eyes lit up "it's a boy?" Nathan asked but before he could say anything else Lucas lifted his bottle up as if to say wait.

Lucas continued "with Brooke" before taking a long gulp.

A pin could have dropped and then a perplexed Nathan roared "our Brooke? Brooke Davis?"

"Yes"

Nathan shook his head "Luke, that's not funny. You almost gave me a heart attack" and he took his own long gulp.

Lucas grinned "Nathan. His name is Noah and he's six years-" and before he could finish Nathan uncontrollably spat out his drink spraying Lucas' shirt.

"You're not joking?" Nathan asked quickly once he was able to speak, he gave his brother a serious look "how is this even possible"

Lucas shrugged nonchalantly "long story short. Brooke got pregnant the first time we got together and didn't tell anyone, she had Noah during summer break and gave him up for adoption, or thought she had. Turns out there was a mix up and Brooke found out about Noah when she tried to foster Sam"

Nathan still looked utterly confused "what does this even mean?"

"It means that I now have a six year old son with Brooke"

"So she's getting him back, fuck Luke, this is crazy"

"Yeah" Lucas drank some more.

Nathan was watching his brother carefully, "you okay?" he asked.

Lucas turned his back on the night sky and abandoned his beer bottle on the rail, "I haven't figured that out yet" he replied running his fingers through his short blonde hair

Nathan's shocked expression started to abate and he began to grin, with a string grip Nathan gave Lucas' shoulder a squeeze, "I guess congratulations are in order"

"Thanks Nate" Lucas closed his eyes as he felt the supportive warmth of his brother, he gave a grateful sigh and opened his eyes again to smile at Nathan "you have no idea how much I appreciate that"

Something filled Lucas - hope, joy and excitement. The brother's grinned at each other.

"You didn't want to tell Haley?" Nathan rolled his eyes "this will blow her mind"

Lucas' smile fell "I figured Brooke's going to need a friend".

-x-

The house was dark when Haley knocked on Brooke's front door and it took longer than she expected for Brooke to answer, the look on her friends face when she finally opened the door was of apprehension, "Haley?"

With a smile Haley lifted her hand "I brought wine"

"I'm sorry-" Brooke's eyes widened, her body relaxing as she placed her hand over her heart "-I love you Haley but you're not my type"

"But I need you" Haley's tone was serious and then overdramatic "I can't live without" her hands clasped together as if begging, the bottle of wine between them.

Her arm stretched out and Brooke snatched the wine, "okay you can come in"

Haley followed her friend inside; "to be honest I thought you would turn me away" Haley shrugged off her jacket and hanged it on the coat rack before joining Brooke in the kitchen. The brunette had already placed two wine glasses down.

Head down as she got ready to open the bottle Brooke lifted her gaze to look at the other woman, "when Haley James Scott comes to my door at this time I let her in, besides I could use a drink" and she poured them each one.

"I gathered that. I know something is going on. Jamie overheard Peyton saying she slapped you and I know you have been extra secretive lately but it was Lucas who told me to come over" Haley took a deep breath, "he implied there was something I should hear from you"

"I guess I deserve that" Brooke took a sip, "Sam and I were just about to sit down for some popcorn and a movie you could join us?"

At the mention of her name Sam stood from the couch, "I'm going to have a shower first and get my jammies on" the teen winked at Brooke, "a _long_ shower" and she practically ran upstairs.

Alone Brooke lead Haley over to the green sofa, her glass in one hand and the open bottle in the other, "did Luke tell you anything?"

Haley sat, turning her body to face Brooke, both their arms went to the back of the sofa their fingers almost touching. She raised both eyebrows "no, he wouldn't tell me anything except that nothing has happened between the two of you… I had to ask him, my love triangle alarm had started to ding but I just don't understand" Haley's head shook, "why would Peyton hit you? What's this got to do with Luke? There's been nothing between you for years, I mean did Peyton get angry about New York because that was a million years ago and-"

"It's not that. But it is about the past between Luke and I" Brooke briefly looked away and then smiled at Haley, she took another sip of wine for courage, "something I lied to Lucas about" her chest lifted as she took and let out a deep breath and Haley's fingers reached out to touch hers.

The mother's deep brown eyes stared warmly at Brooke and she licked her lips as her voice shook a little "is it about the baby?" the words were soft and Brooke sharply looked at Haley.

Haley placed her wine glass onto the table close by and relaxed into the sofa cushions to meet Brooke's questioning gaze, "I remember when you were there for me when I was pregnant with Jamie, how much you seemed to know, you told me that when you were younger you had been pregnant and chose not to keep the baby. It was Luke's, wasn't it?"

"Yes"

"That was a tough position you were in, you both were so young and different people back then and the way things ended between you two… I understand why you made the decision you did about not going through with the pregnancy and I really hope they aren't holding that against you now" Haley did not look happy, "they're finally together and engaged and having their own baby!" she looked Brooke straight in the eye, "don't let them make you feel any worse about it, okay"

Brooke had struggled to sit quietly as Haley gave her impassioned speech, she squirmed in her spot, when Haley had stopped Brooke took one last sip and then refilled her glass before abandoning it next to Haley's. Their hands separated and Brooke sat further along the couch, "I didn't have an abortion"

"What do you mean?"

"I gave the baby up for adoption"

Straightening up Haley cleared her throat, "oh" and she quickly retrieved her wine glass and finished her drink.

Brooke continued, "I found out when I went to foster Sam that Noah's adoption didn't go through, he's been in foster care for the last six years-"

A loud high pitched scream escaped from Haley causing Brooke to jump and then Haley's arms were wrapped around Brooke, the other woman was practically jumping as she sat on the couch hugging Brooke.

"-this is not what I expected" Brooke managed to get out and Haley's squealing stopped.

Haley was grinning, "I get it, it's complicated, _really complicated_ " she rolled her eyes, her words coming out with barely a breath between them "but who cares, Brooke, you have a son, a _son_ , and I know how much being a mom means to you and I'm guessing you've gone the last six years feeling like a part of your soul is missing and now you're getting it back and it all makes sense and I am _so happy_ for you" and Haley hugged Brooke again, "and that's all that matters".

-x-

"So your best friend suddenly reveals she has a secret kid with your fiancé" Mia whistled, "dang, that's fucked up" the young singer had her feet up on Peyton's desk.

Confused and frustrated with a million other emotions and thoughts running through her head Peyton couldn't stop thinking. After many years trying to regain the happiness and sense of family she'd felt before her mother's death Peyton had finally felt like she had achieved it. A little bubble of the world that was just hers with a devoted man who loved her and she loved back, a little of that was just theirs to block everything else out.

That world Peyton imagined was being invaded, her body felt itchy, she didn't want to think of Lucas' child like that but the boy himself did not feel real to Peyton and she had an uncontrollable need to defend herself and her little dream world. Her bottom perched against her shelving Peyton had her head in her hands but dropped them as she sighed to look at Mia, "it's driving me crazy not being able to _stop_ thinking and worrying about it and wondering what it means" her eyes narrowed "and Lucas just doesn't want to talk about it with me, every time I try to figure out what this means and what he wants he just shuts it down"

Mia was about to speak again when Peyton stood and raised her voice, "like am I crazy to suggest that just because Brooke says… thinks, whatever… that this kid is Lucas' doesn't necessarily make it true?"

Feeling like she was treading on thin ice Mia sucked in a breath between her tight lips, the sound made Peyton turn to her, Mia shrugged "well… not crazy but wishful thinking clouding your judgement maybe"

Peyton sent the other woman a perplexed look, her brow raised as she thought back to high school "you didn't know Brooke back then, she slept with anything with two legs and if he _is_ Luke's then she also dated this douche Felix while she was pregnant. She was definitely no saint. I'm not being a bitch I am being realistic" without even noticing the blonde had started pacing her office, she stopped and rested her hands on the desk across from Mia who quickly dropped her feet out of the way.

"The bitch is shining through though. It's all over your face" Mia said it with a smile and Peyton grabbed a stress ball from her desk and threw it at the young musician, it bounced off Mia's forehead and the two women began to laugh.

"Fine" Peyton stopped laughing, "but how do I get my concerns across without sounding like a total bitch"

"Wait" Mia stretched the word out, "find out more and then if you still think there's a chance-" she smiled and nodded impressed with her solution "- get Haley to be the messenger. What? It's brilliant"

It wasn't the idea that made Peyton grimace, it was the feeling that her little bubble had already burst beyond any fixing.

-x-

By the time Lucas returned home it was nearly midnight, he quietly entered the dark house and breathed a sigh of relief that Peyton was not still awake though when he went to the bedroom he realised his girlfriend was in bed. Ignoring the sense of foreboding in his gut Lucas went and had a shower, the warm water washing away the day and relaxing his body.

Lucas didn't blame Peyton for her emotions, this wasn't easy for him either, and he understood that they had to work through this and Peyton need just as much time as him. The thing Lucas was hoping Peyton would understand is that though he loved her he didn't need Peyton making it harder for him, and labelling Brooke as their enemy was not helping the situation at all.

Alone Lucas took the opportunity to prepack his suitcase for the trip to meet Noah and allowed himself to feel excited about the upcoming week. Though apprehensive about the meeting Lucas was confident, being a father was not something Lucas had doubt over, there was love ready to give, time ready to sacrifice and a dream ready to be realised. It wasn't happening the way Lucas expected but he took it as a gift especially with the new baby coming, Peyton had made it clear she had no desire for a big family in fact she had repeatedly made comments about having only one child. Noah was a chance for Lucas to have more, a chance for his baby to have a sibling to bond with. There was a vision playing inside his mind, his future ideas were shifting and rearranging, a new picture was forming clearly. In the quiet Lucas could almost hear the laughter of children running outside, the thump of a basketball bouncing on the gravel.

It was music to his ears.

The bang of the door brought Lucas back to the here and now, by the time he zipped the suitcase up Peyton was entering the room looking exhausted.

"Did you get what you needed done?"

For a second Peyton looked confused then she blinked and nodded, "yeah" her eyes lowered to the case on the bed, "what's going on?"

"Remember I told you I'm going to California with Brooke, thought it would be easier to pack now and get it out of the way, we are looking at a few schools tomorrow so I'll be too busy" Lucas moved the suitcase to the corner of the room.

Peyton had a million thoughts going through her mind but she stayed silent and simply nodded, "I'm going to have a quick shower" and she escaped the room.

When she returned in a singlet, her hair still stamp, Lucas was already under the covers, "how you feeling?"

She shrugged as she climbed into bed, "okay, I guess. My stomach's better"

"Good"

Both of them sounded flat but they lay on their sides, arms around each other, all of a sudden Peyton kissed Lucas' smooth jaw, "I'm sorry about earlier, I just want to help you"

Lucas sighed, "I know and I know this isn't easy for you either"

Closing her eyes Peyton rested her head below his chin, inhaling his clean scent, her voice low "I want to be okay with this, I want to be the supportive wife but I can't help feeling like everything has changed, I love you Lucas and I have fought so hard to be here and I was finally happy and now…" _I don't want to share you with anyone, not Brooke and not her child_. Peyton stopped the thought, "I just don't want this to change us"

"It won't" Lucas promised as he pulled Peyton in closer, though he thought to himself that it wouldn't change them unless they let it. The words stayed inside him and soon he heard the soft snoring signalling Peyton had drifted asleep. Lost in his own thoughts Lucas lay awake in the darkness long into the night.

-x-

The sun was still rising marking the start of the new day as Brooke ended her morning run, sweaty and hot Brooke ripped her singlet off as soon as the door closed behind her, "morning" she greeted Haley who was already dressed and ready for the day, "my clothes look good on you"

"I hope you don't mind, I took a jacket too, this dress reveals way too much"

"You look hot. You're just a little bit curvier than me"

Haley shook her head, "I'm a teacher"

"You must drive all those teenage boys crazy" Brooke winked and Haley threw a bagel at Brooke with a little extra force, catching it Brooke took a large bite, "thanks" and joined Haley at the kitchen counter.

It felt like a normal morning yet nothing was normal, Brooke had spent the night between Haley and Sam in her own bed which gave Brooke a sense of comfort. The night had reminded Brooke of when they were teenagers and she was grateful that Haley had taken the time away from her own home and family to help support Brooke.

"Sam's still asleep" Haley informed Brooke, her hands now cradling a large coffee mug.

Brooke rolled her eyes, "she won't get up until fifteen minutes before we have to leave"

With a cheeky smile Haley replied, "soon you will have two kids to drag out of bed"

"I just don't see Noah as a kid who sleeps in" Brooke laughed trying to picture Noah lying in bed on a lazy morning, she shook her head, her face lighting up which sent a warm tingle through Haley to see her friend so happy.

"You didn't tell me what he is like"

"I know but with the whole Luke thing… I feel like it's not fair to him if I brag all about Noah before he gets to meet him" she sent Haley a look, her face closing off, "we went straight to typical Brooke and Lucas mode, biting each other' s heads off"

"Give it time. You two can be volatile but also a pretty amazing team, no matter what you will do great with Noah, I am sure of it" Haley sounded confident but Brooke didn't look too sure.

Eyes lowered Brooked played with her fingers as she lowered her voice, "I really think we can make this work" she looked up, her light brown hair flicking backwards "but there's this part of me that feels really guilty" her eyes watered, her hands in the air by her heart as she tried to express how torn she was "like I don't deserve this. I feel selfish to be so happy and grateful to have this chance when that little boy has spent the last six years alone"

Haley abandoned her coffee and rushed to Brooke, she cradled her friend "you can't take that time back but you sure as hell can make sure he is never alone again and that should make you happy" she kissed the top of Brooke's head in an instinctive move and held her until Brooke gained control of her emotions and made an excuse to get away by claiming she needed a shower.

When Brooke reappeared she looked as if she had just stepped off the cover of a magazine, composed and beautiful, "thanks again Tutor Girl" she paused, "are you sure you're okay with coming along today?"

"Of course, I've got the first two periods free anyway and Nathan is more than capable of taking Jamie to school besides I am actually really looking forward to seeing the Oppenheimer School so I'm kind of using you" she pinched her thumb and middle finger together "just a little bit"

Brooke laughed "I sometimes forget how much of a nerd you are"

"Compared to you anyone's a nerd" Sam drawled as she appeared ready for school yet still half asleep.

With a smile Brooke greeted Sam, "morning my ever charming daughter"

"What's so good about it, it's a school day" the teenager groaned, "can I come with you guys?"

"No" they both replied.

"Fine, be like that, but just so you know Richards is my favourite teacher"

Haley was quick to shoot back, "yeah but he doesn't have an in with the person who can ground you"

Glancing at Brooke, who was currently hopping in one spot as she simultaneously tried to put her heels on while packing her purse, Sam coughed "ooh I'm so scared"

Oblivious Brooke was finally done, she looked up and smiled, "how do I look?"

"Like a total MILF" Sam pursed her lips and Brooke sighed.

Standing tall Brooke played with her hair, smoothing it some more, "funnily enough that was not the look I was going for"

"Tell that to your wardrobe"

Haley began to chuckled and tried to hide it, "you look fine Brooke, just like a mother whose child any school will be lucky to have"

"I know they've all accepted Noah already but I still want to look… serious, make a good first impression"

Sam arched her brow, eyeing Brooke carefully, before anyone could respond there was a knock at the door and Brooke quickly looked in the mirror again, her shoulders straightening up further, Brooke gave a shake of her head having her hair fall forward before brushing one side back behind her ear. Watching Brooke carefully Sam's brow arched further as her foster mother went to answer the door, she paused for a second to smooth down her dress skirt before opening the door.

"Lucas, hi"

Sam frowned, whispering beneath her breath " _yeah sure, that's why_ ".

-x-

 **Cue eyesex. So… what you think? The Haley scene flowed out I just couldn't imagine her not being team Brooke on this. I also feel for Peyton here, because if I was in her situation I would want more clarity before making it all so complicated. If there is a chance that the child isn't Lucas' and Peyton has a question mark even if they all think he is Luke's… I don't think asking for paternity makes someone a dick especially in situations of one night stands or casual relationships or where one person has a known promiscuous side. I'm a realist. And all Peyton has is Brooke's word and she knows Brooke was sleeping with other guys just before she got with Luke and just after, it's her way of looking out for Lucas (and of course herself).**

 **I'm really looking forward to Noah coming back into the story, shouldn't be long. With Lucas' first meeting with his son coming up how do you the readers see it happening? What should Luke say to Noah?**

 **Anyways, I'm going to try to update more now that I've got internet up and running. However I am back on track with my other BL fic (Good Behaviour) and will be regularly uodateing that as well so it'll prob be one chapter each at a time. If you like bad boy Lucas check Good Behaviour out, another BL son story (how the tides turn, I use to have so many girl stories)**

 **Random fact. Read on if you want to hear about other poss fics that helped me make up this one, if not catch ya next time.**

 **So, I always have heaps of fanfics on my computer. I outline the characters, plot, usually write one or two chapters plus excerpts of main scenes. Sometimes they sit for years before I write more or I just add random scenes. Often these ideas sometimes a variants of each other until I settle on the one I want to upload. A few similar story ideas that were absorbed by this one:**

 **Among the Lillies. One of the first fics I started writing so like 12 years old or so, also helped inspire my previous fanfic Girl behind the Red Door. An AU future where Brooke had been pregnant in s1 and she told Lucas but pushed him away choosing to give the baby up for adoption. This pushed Keitha nd Karen closer and they got together quicker and a pregnant Brooke asks them to adopt the baby. This baby is a girl who Karen and Keith name Lily. Brooke leaves town after giving birth and throws herself into work, Lucas struggles with his role as brother and ends up distancing himself from his parents and Lily. The story starts on Lily's 14** **th** **birthday, a year after the death of Karen and Keith, Lily is now being raised by Lucas who has returned to Tree Hill. The night of her birthday she overhears Lucas telling Lucas that he doesn't feel like her brother and learns she is adopted, she does not hear enough to know Lucas is her biological father and he is struggling with his fatherly feelings. Lily confronts Lucas which leads to an angry rain scene where he tells her that no matter what they are to each other they will always be family. Lily with the help of her girlfriends figures out who her biological mother is and convinces Lucas to help her meet her. This leads to Brooke coming to Tree Hill to get to know the daughter she gave up.**

 **Another Brooke is pregnant in s1 story and gave baby up for adoption without anyone knowing that I stared was placed in a cannon series future where the child is in his 30's. Axl (nickname from his full name) was adopted by a rich family but his adoptive mother died and he was rejected by his adoptive father though close to his grandfather and brother though they both die. Axl was a young father himself, marrying his high school sweetheart and they have two kids who they now share custody of. Axl has made a mess with his life and his marriage after losing his little brother. He is a musician (and looks like eric dane in my mind) who sings karaoke at a local pub when Haley stumbles across him and wants to sign him with Red Bedroom Records but he rejects her (recognizing her name and knowing who she is to him). Haley talks to Brooke about him and Brooke realises it's her son and goes to talk to him. And the rest is history as he and his family enters the lives of the Tree Hill residents. I think it was a rare non BL story where I didn't get rid of J/B or LP at all. Which is probably why I didn't get far with it. Mwahaha.**


	8. Chapter 8

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting. I do own a set of teal suitcases that my sister ran over when we had to evacuate our house due to a local bushfire. I love Australia, where year round the fire risk is at least moderate**

 _Author note: sorry, sorry, sorry. Life man, priorities, ah, sigh, excuses. How about this, compared to the numbers reading this fic the reviews are pretty pitiful, if I can get 20 reviews by next Monday night I'll give you the next chapter within a week of then. If I fail you don't have review the next two chapters as pay back lol._

Chapter Eight

The drive had been awkward and quiet, even with Haley sitting in the backseat there was an unspoken conversation hovering between Brooke and Lucas. Acting more reserved than usual the two of them were stiff and watching them Haley wanted to bang their heads together but kept her mouth shut as they toured the school. In awe the teacher oohed over the facilities and smiled as they watched early morning mathketball, though Brooke and Lucas did share a look at the sight with their frosty demeanour warming for a second to share a derisive smile. The more they were shown the more nervous Brooke became, excusing herself Brooke escaped to the restroom.

Alone in the hallway Haley nudged Lucas, "what are you thinking?"

"Like I don't belong here and-" he lowered his voice "-that I am underdressed, maybe I should have worn a tie" he subconsciously tugged at his collar causing Haley to chuckle.

Patting her friends back Haley rolled her eyes, "you look great plus Brooke acts like it's a done deal so you don't need to impress. This place is amazing"

"I don't know, it seems… stiff"

"No you seem stiff" Haley shot back, "you need to relax"

"I am trying" Lucas sighed.

Hand still on his back Haley lead Lucas a little further down the hallway, "you need to relax around Brooke, you both act like you're waiting for the other to attack"

"I messed up Hales, I told myself to be calm but I was just so angry and I lashed out at her and I was an idiot"

"Do you think after everything Brooke will hold that against you? That girl in there is doing her best to make this right for everyone, she is so full of guilt and shame, afraid that she is about to gain something but lose everything else. You just need to be there and try not to be an idiot again"

"How is she really?"

Haley smiled, "she's mostly happy and that makes her feel guilty because she is bursting with it and thinks it's at everyone else's expense" licking her lips Haley stared into Lucas' eyes, "what about you?"

Before answering Lucas checked behind him, he gave a shy look to his friend "the same. Mostly happy and that brings along other feelings because maybe I am too happy. At first I didn't expect that but I can't help it, Hales, I'm just counting down the minutes before I get to finally meet Noah"

"I'm excited for you. I told Brooke this already and now I'm telling you" she squeezed his shoulder, "you're going to do great, you two will be amazing parents"

"Oh I'm going to be the best dad ever" Lucas grinned putting on an act of over confidence, the two of them were still laughing when Brooke reappeared, the brunette's face was pale "hey, sorry, what's next?"

"I think we are meeting her in the library" Haley answered.

-x-

After dropping Haley off at the high school Lucas drove Brooke back home and followed her inside, ignoring him for as long as she could Brooke kept her back to Lucas, slowly placing her things down and heading to the far side of the open living area into the kitchen, "coffee?"

"Sure"

Feeling awkward Lucas wasn't sure where to go, he tried to relax and settled on sitting on the couch, his hands rubbing his thighs. Lucas had sat in the same spot many times before usually with Brooke to his left, but always with his friend next to him, today though when Brooke finished placing his coffee mug down in front of him she returned with her own and sat on the one-seater by herself. The distance between them felt like miles, Lucas shifted and put effort into not commenting on the change.

Not wanting to stay silent Lucas spoke first, moving his thoughts away from heir seating arrangements because _it shouldn't bother me_ he told himself, "what did you think about the school?"

"It was… lovely" her tongue clicked involuntarily afterwards, "and Haley loved it, it was so…"

"Stiff, cold, boring-"

"Anal" Brooke cut in and the air between them relaxed as they both chuckled, "No sports? What the hell"

"No kid of ours is going to sit around playing mathsketball"

Brooke laughed again, "I think Noah would actually love mathketball"

"Really?"

Her eyes light up, Lucas smiles as he sees it, it was love and pride and joy swimming around in her eyes, the idea of just the thought of their son putting that look on Brooke's face filled Lucas with warmth, it was contagious and he grinned too.

Without realising it Brooke was leaning forward, "yes, he's brilliant Luke, brilliant! but serious. He looks like he has never held a basketball in his life, I want to show him he can have fun, laugh out loud and be silly"

"If my memory serves me right you're pretty good at that"

"I think we all agree you were pretty boring before I fixed you"

"You left your mark" Lucas agreed, their playful banter turning more serious. Brooke had been wearing a quirky smile and it fell as the atmosphere changed between them, looking down at her feet Brooke took a breath.

As her eyes raised again, not quite meeting Lucas', she shrugged a shoulder, "It went both ways, you rubbed off on me too, I guess I needed _less_ fun"

He frowned, not liking the way Brooke worded it, about to say something Lucas was surprised when there was a knock on the door. Brooke immediately stood, Lucas followed her with his eyes as she opened the door and stepped back as Julian walked in, "Morning, I brought you coffee and donuts" he stepped around Brooke as he spoke, placing a casual kiss on her cheek and with a grin walked in even further, "how'd it go t-" Julian stopped, his large grin slipping when he saw Lucas sitting on the couch, "oh, hi Luke"

"Julian"

"Did you like the school?" Julian asked, his light eyes going between Brooke and Lucas.

Unimpressed with the intrusion Lucas didn't answer, his expression appearing bored. Brooke tried to smile, "I think we both agree it's not the right fit for us"

"Shame, maybe the next one will be better" Julian finished and the room fell silent, the three adults unmoving except for their eyes flicking from one to the other, the longer it lasted the more awkward it became. Julian rocked on his feet, "I'll just leave you to it, here you go Brooke" he handed over the takeaway coffee and gave Brooke a soft hug, "call me later"

Lucas glared at Julian's back and when the other man said his name in farewell Lucas ignored him, standing up as Brooke closed the door behind Julian, "is something going on between you two?"

"He's a friend" Brooke narrowed her eyes, defensive, unable to describe what exactly was going on between Julian and her, "Julian's been a great friend and he is really good with Sam, I don't know what I would do without him"

"We barely know the guy"

"Don't speak for me. I know Julian"

His face twisted, Lucas looked to the ground, "clearly" he replied sarcastically.

With a determined chin Brooke took a step closer to Lucas, lifting her face to look Lucas in the eye, "y _es_. Julian was there for me after Xavier, he has supported me since I found out about Noah, he is reliable and trustworthy and _nice_ "

 _STOP!_ Lucas told himself, _you have no right to question her. No right to judge her relationship with Julian when he has been there for her when you can't, shouldn't, won't…_ Lucas stopped mentally berating himself. They'd been friends for years and Lucas was protective, it was natural as friends and he would admit their past relationship made it that much harder for him to like the men who crossed Brooke's path and now that his son was in the middle of it Lucas felt it even more, and he was aware of the hypocrisy so Lucas forced logic and reason to push those feelings away.

Reluctantly Lucas did his best to sound sincere, "I'm glad you've had someone to be there for you" _even if it is that over smiling oaf_ "I've overstepped the line, I'm sorry. Look, let's forget this ever happened. Do you want me to pick you up this afternoon for the tour at Whiteside?"

"Actually, I have a few things to do today, it'll be easier if we just meet there"

"Fine" Lucas nodded, he hadn't had much of his own coffee but expected it had gone cold, he quickly emptied it down the sink and placed the mug in the dishwasher, "I'll see you there then, bye Brooke"

"Thanks Luke, I'll see you later" Brooke follower him to the door and didn't let go of the breath she was holding until Lucas was in his car and reversing out of her driveway.

-x-

It wasn't until hours later that Brooke realised she was angry, "… and then he gave me this look as if to say _Brooke, he is not good enough for you_ " she deepened her voice as she imitated Lucas. With her phone on hands free Brooke drove eyes on the road, her fists banged the steering wheel "as if he is any good at judging that"

"You don't have the best track record" a male voice replied and Brooke froze.

"Mouth?"

Over the speaker Millie's voice came through, "sorry Brooke, you're on speaker phone"

"Oh, hi Mouth"

"Hi, Brooke-"

"What do you mean I don't have the best track record?"

Mouth chuckled, "high school, do I need to mention Felix or that teacher not to mention-" there was a squeal, Millie cut in "you dated a teacher?"

" _Maybe_ -" Brooke conceded, "-Mouth has a point" but then she jumped in excitement, almost missing a stop sign as she bounced in her seat "what about Chase? He's sweet"

"Boring" Mouth deadpanned, "the word you're looking for is boring, I guess he was safe but really Brooke there's Owen-"

With a huff Brooke almost turned her phone off, "I get the picture"

"- and then Lucas…"

"MARVIN! Isn't he one of your oldest friends?" Millie reprimanded which made Brooke laugh.

"Luke is great; he is a great brother, he is a great friend but as a boyfriend…" as he said it Brooke imagined Mouth rolling his eyes, "he could work on it"

Under her breath Brooke mumbled, "tell me about it"

"It's bound to be a little weird" Millie's voice was soft, "finding out about your son was totally unexpected – mind blowing – I can't imagine how he is feeling"

"Apparently like I'm now his property. You know, I'm the mother of his child, not _a_ child, he doesn't need to treat me like one. I feel like I can't breathe"

The other two were silent for a while, finally Mouth answered, "give it time Brooke, it'll work out"

"Haley said the same thing"

"Well his parents may be a mess but your kid is going to have awesome aunts and uncles"

Rolling her eyes as Mouth chuckled Brooke kept driving, spotting the school entrance she searched for a parking spot, "okay, I just got here, I will talk to you guys later"

"Bye Brooke" they both replied and Brooke returned the farewell before ending the call and parking. After a quick check in the rear-view mirror and reapplying her lip stick Brooke exited the car. As soon as she lifted her gaze Brooke found herself staring at Lucas who stood leaning against his own car, "hi" he gave a nervous smile.

For a moment Brooke felt like she had gone back six years, "hi"

"You ready?"

-x-

Tension hummed between them as they walked side by side, close enough that they could accidentally touch at points before they quickly parted. The longer they stood next to each other the more uncomfortable they both felt, Brooke was use to ignoring the energy between them after all she had a lot of practice. Usually they both shifted it into their friendship playing a dangerous game and subconsciously avoiding each other as much as they could once Lucas got with Peyton. A combination of joint memories, knowledge and sexual attraction that added a layer to their interactions. Group settings were the best, safest option.

It would be unavoidable now Brooke inwardly groaned at the thought of the constant interaction sharing a child will create between them, envisioning it becoming worse each time. It was in his eyes, that look Lucas wore that had Brooke wanted to alternate between slapping and kissing him.

Right now they were doing everything not to look at each other focusing all their attention on the head master who was showing them around, their bodies slightly stiff and Lucas usually walking in front of Brooke. They both asked questions, seemingly pleased with the answers, and after an hour their nerves and awareness started to relax, the wall between them slowly lowering.

When they were shown out and alone together once more Brooke instantly crossed her arms, without even realising it she began to rub her upper arms, her chin shifting so she was facing slightly away from Lucas even as she spoke, "that was an improvement. What did you think?"

"It's a lot more relaxed, I loved the physical education aspect of it and the kids here all looked engaged. You say Noah is very bright and this place could give him a lot of opportunities"

"I really want you to meet him and learn about him yourself, I agree about Whiteside though and if you're okay with it I will go ahead with the enrolment here?" Brooke sent Lucas a sideways glance as she asked and the glance turned into a lock and the two of them found themselves stopping.

Lucas' tone was soft, "I'm okay with that"

The seconds ticked by, Brooke gulped, "good… I… uh… will contact them back tomorrow morning"

They both shifted where they stood yet neither made the move to start walking again, Lucas didn't know what to say though he had a feeling inside him that was screaming to say something, _anything_. His emotions were unstable and ever changing, looking at Brooke was a roller coaster. One moment he is content, the next angry, the next on the verge of joy, impatient, sad… one emotion after another.

It was confusing for the author who was usually good at expressing himself. Should he apologise, too many apologies seemed strange to Lucas especially considering he still felt like there were no amount of apologies that could take back what Brooke had done.

One emotion that Lucas felt was _hurt_. It wasn't just the years Lucas had missed with his son, he might not agree with what Brooke had done yet he strangely understood it, a part of Lucas recognised that the Brooke Davis he knew truly believed she was doing the best thing for their baby. Because she loved him that much she could put their son ahead of her own love. And that was what hurt Lucas.

Brooke didn't trust him. Even now that guarded look she wore, the way she held her body slightly away from him, protecting herself from Lucas' mere presence was a reminder that so many years later Brooke Davis still didn't trust him and it was an effort for her to put their son into his hands. Or that is how is seemed to the young father.

For a split second Lucas went to step forward freezing still when Brooke automatically stepped backwards and away from him, they both pretended it hadn't happened and caused the moment to become even more awkward. Brooke hugged herself, aimlessly looking at their surroundings, anywhere but at Lucas "well…" she began and then was saved by the ringing of her phone.

Lucas watched as Brooke answered sounding relieved though he quickly noticed her tone suddenly changing to concern. Fingers curling tighter around her cell phone and brow creasing Brooke stepped away from Lucas, "what does this mean?... yes, yes, of course… I will be there… I got to go and arrange it, thanks, bye" Brooke finished the call with a sigh, her hand swiping at her forehead, "that was Carine, my social worker" Brooke shook her head at Lucas and he instinctively reached out to Brooke, his hand touching the back of her shoulder, then bringing her to his chest.

For a spilt second Brooke relaxed into Lucas before pushing herself away from him, "they won't let us bring Noah home next week, the judge that was meant to approve the transfer instead is not allowing Noah to cross state borders" she gave a frustrated scream.

"What do we do?" Lucas felt the panic himself, the world started to close in on him. Losing Noah so soon after finding out about his son twisted his heart.

"I have to go there tonight, we're going in front of the judge tomorrow morning" she started to ramble, her eyes back to her phone "I have to call my lawyer, there's new plane tickets, the hotel, Sam… I have to ask Haley to have Sam tonight as well-" her fingers started typing.

"Let me help, I'm in this too"

Brooke didn't answer for a minute, focused on her phone she had her brows creased, finally she looked up at Lucas "pick me up at six to go to the airport, I just booked our tickets" and without another word Brooke was heading towards the driver's side of her car leaving Lucas stunned for a moment before he too quickly left.

On the drive home Brooke called her lawyer in California and then directed her phone to send a message to Millie to change her check in date at the hotel to tonight before calling Haley. Once she was home Brooke raced inside, "Sam! SAM!" running upstairs Brooke didn't bother knocking, "there's been a change of plans, I need to leave tonight. Pack what you can for Nathan and Haley's house" just as quickly as she appeared Brooke was back downstairs in her own room pulling out her suitcases. Due to all the travel most things were already packed, Brooke added a few outfits and then went to shower and dress for the plane.

After a quick clean of the living area Brooke went to spend the last of her free time with Sam. The teenager's mood was sombre as they packed up her bag, "this will be all over soon and things will be normal again, neither of us sleeping anywhere but here"

"I thought we would have one more night just the two of us" Sam sent Brooke a guilty look and quickly added, "not that I don't want… you know… I just-"

Brooke stopped folding Sam's clothes and reached over to hug the younger girl, resting her chin on Sam's dark head "I know. I'm going to make time for just the two of us, I owe you for all I've put you through the last couple of months. I wish I could take you with me"

"Yeah but stupid school" Sam groaned, wiping her eyes as she pushed away from Brooke. No tears were visible yet Sam's eyes were bright red, she threw one last thing into her suitcase and zipped it up angry that she was doing this so soon after unpacking. Lifting the suitcase Sam left the room avoiding Brooke, grabbing the two other bags Brooke followed.

They were barely downstairs when there was a knock on the door, Sam threw it open and pushed Lucas aside as she left the house leaving Brooke to apologise. When Lucas asked if she needed help Brooke pointed towards her own luggage.

As they were walking down Brooke's steps Lucas went to speak, Ï should warn you that-"

Brooke froze, her mouth falling open to the sight of Peyton in the driver's seat of Lucas' car "you have got to be kidding. Really?" she glared at Lucas but rolled her eyes and continued her way to the car before Lucas could reply. Together they placed the luggage in the trunk and Brooke squeezed in next to Sam as Lucas joined Peyton in the front.

No one spoke in the car and Brooke let out a deep breath when they arrived at Haley and Nathan's jumping out immediately to help Sam with her bags. Lucas went to open his door but Peyton quickly covered his hand stilling him, with a shake of her head she mouthed _leave them_. Lucas gave a nod giving Brooke and Sam space to say goodbye, watching them as they walked side by side, as Haley and Nathan greeted them with huge hugs and smiles, taking the bags away from them allowing Sam and Brooke to embrace in a crushing hug. Lucas could see the way Brooke swayed Sam within her arms, her fingers stroking the teenager's hair. Brooke whispered words against Sam, her eyes closing with three last words before cupping Sam's face briefly and stepping away.

Once Brooke was back in the car Peyton drove off again, the eerie silence making the drive uncomfortable, it was a prickling annoying discomfort and Lucas couldn't wait for them to be at the airport. Lucas had not wanted Peyton to drive them but Peyton had given logical reasons in a calm sweet tone that Lucas found hard to argue with without turning it into a losing fight. _I can't say goodbye to my fiancé? Shouldn't I be the one complaining about Brooke taking you to another state all I want is to help you out in the small way I can._ Her words came back to him. Peyton had a small smile on her face which contradicted the atmosphere in the car, and when they finally got to the airport and parked the car Brooke was quick to leave, grabbing her own luggage before Lucas and Peyton even stepped foot outside the car. Sunglasses blocking half her face from view Brooke turned her back on the other two waiting metres in front before walking ahead.

Peyton looped her arm with Lucas, leaning into his side, grunting Lucas was grateful he packed light, "call me when you get there" she told him for the fifth time since they left his place, "let me know how things go"

"I'll try. I'm not sure how much free time we will have, and I want you to sleep properly and not worry about me. I've got this covered, you worry about taking care of yourself-" as they got to the doors Lucas paused and touched her gentle swell with his free hand, "-and baby Scott"

"Hurry home, I'm not sure I can sleep without you anymore" her bottom lip began to drop and Lucas stopped her with a gentle kiss.

Pulling away Lucas smiled gently, "I will be home Sunday" and then he freed himself from her arms, over Peyton's shoulder he could see Brooke starting to disappear in the crowd as the distance grew between them, "I better go"

"I can-" she began.

"Peyton, I love you" Lucas kissed her again, "it's okay, go home, I'll be home before you know it" and Lucas didn't give her a chance to say anything else, he stepped around her with a soft goodbye.

By the time Lucas caught up with Brooke she had already collected their tickets and before he knew it they were sitting on the plane leaving Lucas surprised at how much smoother boarding first class was.

Instead of making conversation Brooke made it clear she was planning on working, slipping earplugs in to listen to music so any attempt of Lucas' to talk was redundant.

With a sigh Lucas made himself comfortable, he could read the nervous tension coming from Brooke, could tell she was stressed and worried. On the other hand, Lucas was excited, no matter what was about to happen, no matter how long it would be until he could fly Noah home, all Lucas could think about was that he was finally going to meet his son.

Tomorrow was already the best day of his life and it hadn't even happened yet.

 _-x-_

 _Hmmmm I wonder what is going to happen next chapter. Perhaps a father and son catch up. Wanna bet on how it'll go?_


	9. Little Wonders

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting. I do own a lot of turtle themed things, just got a new turtle keyring.**

 _Well you guys did it, I appreciate all those without accounts or who didn't sign in that reviewed who don't normally. I encourage you to review the fics you read, it may seem like nothing but it does help. I find it inspires me to write and update as I know people are waiting and want an update._

 _So as promised the next chapter!_

 _I would also like to give a big HAPPY BIRTHDAY to my little boy. He is asleep now after a big day, I took him to the zoo and then we came home and he opened all his presents which def cheered him up. I think he is getting sick which sucks, he came out with a rash tonight, hopefully he is over it before his bday party grrr, so much to do. Have a good easter everyone, I'm going to enjoy the long weekend and excuse to eat chocolate and hang with the people I care about. Thanks and bye guys!_

Chapter Nine

Words were not needed between Brooke and Lucas, the night before Lucas had given Brooke space and this morning they had come together in a united front. Nothing else mattered as they nervously held hands, it was reminisced of the time Lucas spent supporting Brooke while she cared for baby Angie but this time Brooke was supporting Lucas as well sending him a shy smile of hope and comfort as they entered the judges chambers.

One of Brooke's lawyers was with them, a sharp woman in her forties with a strong English accent who wore a silver-grey suit and crisp white blouse against her dark skin. Despite her no-nonsense attitude the lawyer had a smile that put both Brooke and Lucas at ease, she introduced herself as Alisha. Maxine, the social worker, had shaken Lucas' hand and now stood with them in front of the judge who sat behind his desk.

Lucas wasn't sure who had requested the privacy but suspected it was the lawyer, it felt less formal except for the judge's stern expression. The greying man eyed them, the next few minutes was a lot of doing as they were told. Finally sitting down Lucas and Brooke had their middle hands locked together resting on Lucas' knee.

When his presence was questioned Alisha was the one to explain Lucas' position as Noah's biological father and a close platonic friend of Brooke's. And too his amazement Lucas listened as his and Brooke's lives were summed up in no more than five minutes. Their living, relationship, financial, work and family support situations were all discussed. Questions were asked and answered.

Brooke's voice didn't shake when she was called upon yet Lucas could hear the raw emotion as she spoke of the decision to give Noah up for adoption and then how she learnt his adoption was cancelled and Noah was without a family. Despite six years apart there was no doubt to anyone in the room they were looking at a mother who loved her son and would do anything for him. Lucas wished he had a frame of reference to go by on Noah, there was still a sense of this all being a dream to him.

The room started to close in Lucas after he spoke about his desire to be a good father, to support Brooke in introducing him to his life in Tree Hill, he talked about his dreams of his children growing up as close siblings, when the words were finished though Lucas wasn't sure what was being said. His mind wandered and Lucas tried to catch up, he was half aware of Maxine supporting them, of the judge being more critical of Lucas' role than Brooke's.

Then Brooke was crying and her tears were wetting his shoulder where she buried her head, fingers clutching his collar. In the next moment Brooke was away from him, tears still in her eyes as she grinned, saying thank you to everyone.

"I'm not sure what just happened" Lucas smiled at Brooke when they were back in the hallway, all he realised is it was good because all the stress seemed to have just disappeared from Brooke.

"We can take Noah home on Sunday as planned" Brooke almost jumped in the air as she said the words, Lucas found himself hugging her, lifting her small frame and spinning around the slightest before placing Brooke's feet back on the ground.

Maxine interrupted them with a smile, her tone as serious as ever, "it means you can take him home tomorrow if you wish"

"Really?" Brooke held in her squeal.

"Yes. All your parental rights have been reinstated, a signature and a stamp and Noah is no longer a ward of the state, he is your son Brooke in each and every way possible, to be taken wherever and whenever at your will"

The lawyer added "I will try to expedite the paperwork. Ms Daly, and I correct to assume then you will not prevent my client from collecting her son today?"

"Prevent no, caution against? yes. Noah still needs to adjust to leaving his current environment. I will happily contact the head master and confirm that Miss Davis is in charge of Noah's care now. Congratulations Brooke"

Maxine and Brooke shook hands, then out of courtesy she took Lucas' in a shake too and bid farewell.

As they began to walk down the hallway Brooke asked Alisha a few questions, the other woman responded "It went better than I hoped though the judge saw no point wasting social services time across states in your case and with Samantha in your care welfare checks will still be carried out so you're not completely out of their reach. Did you understand about your requirements with Mr Scott?"

"A little" Brooke didn't seem sure, Lucas paid close attention, after confirming Brooke was okay with having this conversation in front of him Alisha found a quiet corner and continued.

"You both need to understand that because Mr Scott is not on the birth certificate legally he is still not recognised as Noah's father. As of today, Miss Davis, you have been given sole custody and responsibility of Noah. The judge has ordered that you bare the costs of proving Lucas' paternity and adding his details to the birth certificate, when I have a copy of the orders I will confirm with you the time limit however I advise if you are both willing to do so as soon as possible. This does not however mean that custody changes, you will still retain sole custody-"

"But I'm his father" Lucas growled.

After giving Brooke a look Alisha turned directly to Lucas "and what that role entails is at the moment under the control of my client" she turned back to Brooke, "from our discussions I see no reason why an agreement cannot be reached outside the courts"

"Of course," Brooke looked at Lucas and grabbed him above the elbow pulling him around to face her as he tried to turn away, "you know I won't stop you seeing Noah"

Unsure Lucas gave a nod though he felt slightly sick at how little control he had over the situation and unbidden came the thought of how Brooke had kept their son's existence a secret for six years. Her reassurances were not enough to completely dispel his concerns.

Lucas remained quiet as Brooke and Alisha finished their conversation and then followed Brooke to their rental car, Brooke drove as she was more familiar with the area and Lucas sat with his chin resting gently on against his fingertips lost in thought.

"How do you want to do this?" Brooke asked breaking his train of thought.

"Huh?"

Still driving Brooke rolled her eyes, "we didn't plan to go back until Sunday. If we can leave earlier I would like to spend as little time away from Sam as possible if it can be helped, she only came home Monday but I agree with Maxine we can't just pull Noah away tonight with no warning"

"We are still going today though?"

"Of course, he is expecting it… You're meeting your son today" her voice was sure and Lucas gave a nod but they fell into silence and didn't start discussing it again until they went down to the hotel restaurant for lunch.

After taking a sip of his drink Lucas clung the glass a little too loudly, "what if we tell Noah today, go early tomorrow to help him pack his things and he can have one last day at school and then after school we go to the airport… and home?"

"I think seeing its Noah's first night in Tree Hill we should keep it casual, just the three of us, you could stay for dinner and say good night to Noah"

"I would like that" Lucas lipped his lips and took another sip before speaking again, "I could stay with Noah once he is in bed while you collect Sam"

"That would be great" she suddenly wrinkled her nose "Peyton is not picking us up from the airport. I am drawing the line at that"

Unable to stop it Lucas started to laugh and then laughed harder at Brooke's expression, "I am so sorry" he gained control of himself again, "I really didn't want Peyton to drop us off"

"Let me guess. She asked to in a way that would make you look like a complete dick if you said no"

The look Lucas sent Brooke was all she needed to know she got it right, "neither of us are perfect and I would like to think that other than eventually being Noah's stepmother Peyton will also be one of my best friends again. I understand that she isn't happy with me or this situation, I know Peyton well enough to know that but I can't risk Noah being in the firing line while she figures it out"

"As you said, Peyton is going to be his stepmother…"

"Noah is smart enough to read her passive aggressive remarks and will be able to tell she's faking the smile" Brooke shook her head, "I want Noah to settle in before meeting Peyton, I think it's best he meets Haley and Nathan first" _his actual family_ Brooke didn't add aloud yet the thought was in her mind. Brooke was the last person to think family started and stopped at biology or a piece of paper yet she couldn't help but picture Nathan, Haley and Jamie as Noah's family before Peyton. There was no doubt in Brooke's mind that the Scott family would welcome Noah with huge open arms and a genuine joy.

There was another part of Brooke that wanted to put her hands protectively on Noah's shoulders, narrow her eyes at her oldest friend and growl _mine_. It went both ways, Brooke was not blind to the possessive show Peyton had tried to put on over Lucas. The blonde had been marking her territory and it was those actions Brooke didn't want Noah to be in the middle of, and when it came to her son Brooke wanted to make sure that Peyton understood that though she has Lucas and her own baby, though she would play an important role in Noah's life, _Brooke_ is the one and only _mother_.

"I'm asking for a week. A week for Noah to get to know us, to start to feel comfortable, time for Peyton to calm down" her soft words reached Lucas, he didn't blink, only into at Brooke's sparkling dark eyes.

He gave a nod, "one week"

With a sigh of relief Brooke leaned back, her tone turned slightly nervous "have you told Karen yet?"

Lucas froze, "not yet" uninterested in his food he pushed the plate away, "I've asked Mum to visit as soon as she can so I can tell her in person" he paused then, head down he watched Brooke from between his lashes "have you talked to your parents?"

As quick as lightning Brooke grimaced and replied, "I thought we could invite them to a welcome home party for Noah, along with Dan and maybe Nikki and Nanny Carrie-"

"And I get it" Lucas cut in before Brooke's sarcastic rant went further, "Nathan and Haley first"

"Yes, let's take this slow"

"How exactly do I fit into this?" Lucas asked looking directly at Brooke again.

It wasn't something Brooke had ignored and many hours had been spent by Brooke trying to think about how sharing Noah with Lucas was going to work. Nothing seemed perfect yet it had been a desire to give Noah perfect that had Brooke not believing they could do it all those years ago and now she was simply looking for a compromise.

After a moment to prepare her words Brooke replied, "I had an idea. I really do believe Noah needs consistency most of all, one home, one bed, for now. I can't predict when we will all be ready for a two house scenario and I know that may upset you but I am thinking of Noah. My suggestion is that you see Noah every second day, on school days you can pick him up from school and bring him back for dinner, and if you can't you can come by collect Noah after you finish work or visit with him at my house. On the weekend you can collect him in the morning and bring him back at the end of the day"

Lucas listened carefully and couldn't help but agree, "I like that but if you need someone to look after Noah I want you to come to me first"

"Deal. And I expect the same respect back if you can't spend your time with Noah we can arrange to make it up instead. This Friday I'm suggesting you could come over after lunch for a few hours and then on Saturday the same thing and you could take Noah out alone to a park or something. Sunday we could go to Nathan and Haley's. I'm guessing we both want to be there for Noah's first day of school, if he can start Monday we could both drop him off and pick him up. Then from Wednesday you can pick Noah up by yourself, that'll mean your day with Noah would be the Sunday" her thought process was half ramble and Lucas listened patiently.

"You've thought about this?"

"Once or twice" Brooke smiled.

Agreeing Lucas nodded "It's a plan, down the track we can adjust when needed"

They finished their lunch with the odd remark every now and then, Brooke confirmed she had emailed the school about Noah starting next week and had arranged with Millie for her to organise Noah's school uniform and supplies. Though Lucas was curious about Noah his questions remained vague and Brooke encouraged he learn about Noah through the boy, giving advice about Noah's aptitude and temperament.

As the day went by the more nervous with anticipation Lucas became, on the way to Noah's school Lucas began to squirm, "I would tell you to just relax but I know exactly how you are feeling" Brooke smiled.

The head master met them as soon as they arrived and as always made Brooke feel welcome, she thanked him for everything and introduced Lucas as Noah's father. Though Brooke was paying close attention to everything Headmaster Trinidad was saying Lucas was distracted, his mind and gaze straying every few seconds.

"He is in the library" Trinidad advised Brooke and she motioned for Lucas to follow her.

Though the walk there was quick with both parents going as fast as they could while still technically walking once they were outside the library Lucas froze, taking step back he ran his hands through his short blonde hair as the panic set in.

The air changed, Brooke knew Lucas needed help before she turned around to see him, his face had a blush to it, his eyes oddly bigger than normal and his breathing quickly becoming rapid, it too a second for Brooke to react and take a hold of his arm, his skin clammy.

"Breathe, Luke"

Her hand rubbed his arm as her other rested in the middle of his back, "just breathe" she whispered again, "it's going to be alright, let's wait a minute, it's okay, you'll be fine"

"What do I say?" his words were uneven, his breathing quickening.

Brooke looked around them before grabbing Lucas and holding his face between her hands, "look at me" and he did, "you're Lucas Scott, he is six he doesn't need one of your speeches, just a hello. You won't screw this up, just take your time, take it easy and don't overwhelm him" she was clear and Lucas was amazed at the gentle authority in her voice. It hit hi just how far high school was behind them, Brooke Davis was no longer a teenager she was a strong, independent woman.

With a nod Lucas straightened up and Brooke quickly backed away from him, smoothing down her dress she entered the library and after a minute Lucas followed.

Brooke was already sitting at a desk, Lucas could see her face and her mouth moving but the only thing he could see of Noah was the back of his head. When Brooke saw him she smiled, whispered something else to the boy and began to stand again, her hand out.

Noah took Brooke's hand, his fingers wrapping around hers, body swivelling the boy stood and slowly face Lucas who was now not far from them.

His breath hitched, heart skipping a beat, looking at his son or the first time Lucas felt something strip from him, the world suddenly seemed more solid. Noah was flesh and blood, there in front of him, and _real_. The realisation truly hit for Lucas, he was a father, it wasn't the same as the idea of becoming a dad, the expectation, the waiting. Lucas was now a dad, something had shifted.

There was no doubt this was his son, he _felt it, knew it_ , his body recognised the truth, he saw the shadow of himself in Noah and could see Brooke in him as well. Lucas wanted to see Noah smile but the boy stood motionless with a face that gave nothing away.

"Noah, this is Lucas Scott, your father"

Bending over Lucas smiled, "I'm so happy to finally meet you, Noah"

Back straight Noah raised his eyes to meet Lucas, "It's nice to meet you too" he looked to Brooke who was watching with a smile and then Noah held out his hand.

Lucas grabbed Noah's hand and they gave a quick shake before Lucas added his other hand cupping Noah's between his, getting down on one knee Lucas didn't want to let go of his son's warmth. His heart felt ready to burst, unable to contain it Lucas pulled Noah into a hug, holding the boy to him and burying his face into the boys neck a tear escaped from Lucas.

It almost escaped from Lucas to tell Noah how beautiful he was, how absolutely perfect he seemed to Lucas, instead the moment was quickly broken. A startled Noah instinctively pushed Lucas away, escaping from the hug Noah's eyes had narrowed, his pupils dilating, he jumped backwards and when he came to stop his body turned slightly away from his new father.

For a moment Lucas' mouth dropped open, Brooke almost went to touch Noah's shoulder but stopped herself unsure how the contact would be received, Lucas saw her hesitation, saw her hold her hand back, looking at Noah who didn't quite meet his eyes Lucas bowed his head slightly "I'm sorry, Noah. I guess I am just really excited to see you"

"Why are you crying?" Noah asked, his tone serious.

Lucas gave a chuckle and wiped his wet eyes, "sometimes when people are happy they cry"

As soon as Lucas finished talking Noah blinked and moved on, "Brooke told me you're a writer"

"I am. Do you like books?"

Noah's eyes circled the room and then he kinked his brow as if to say a sarcastic _we're in a library, what do you think?_ And then he spun on the spot and sat back down at the table pushing his books aside, "I prefer nonfiction"

Brooke took a seat again, eyeing Lucas to sit as well when he continued to kneel awkwardly. Lucas slipped in beside Brooke, his hands resting on the table, "my novel was more of an autobiography"

Eyes going between the two adults Noah pursed his lips before reaching for one book and pulling it back to himself, with a thud the book open as Noah replied, "Brooke told me I am not allowed to read your book until I am eighteen"

"We will cross that bridge when we get to it" Brooke gave a nervous smile, "what are you reading this week?"

"Greek mythology"

"Oooh Zeus and Hercules, right?" the excitement showed through as she remembered bits and pieces from when she was at school and from movies, she looked to Lucas and kinked her brow "almost as dramatic as your life. I'm going to see the teachers for a bit and do all the boring stuff, I'll leave you two to this and meet you back here in about thirty" she stood and patted Lucas' back before walking off.

Alone with his son Lucas found himself at a loss of words, Noah followed Brooke with his eyes and then turned his attention to Lucas, "she can be silly sometimes" Noah shook his head and started reading his book, mumbling _"more dramatic than this_ " and gave a little laugh that had his dimples crate two craters in his cheeks.

Lucas observed Noah as he quietly read, the more he watched the boy the more he was reminded of himself, Brooke was there in his eyes and in his smile, but Lucas felt his heart swell at how similar Noah was to him. Nobody could deny Noah was his, people joked that Jamie looked like Lucas because of his colouring yet Noah showed how much Jamie didn't look like his uncle.

"Do you mind if I talk to you?" Lucas asked because Noah didn't seem interested, he tried to look as relaxed as he could yet feared he was failing miserably.

Noah looked up, "that's why you're here, right? Brooke always talks to me. She is my mother but you know that because you're my father, Brooke doesn't like me talking about procreation, but so you know, I understand"

Clearing his throat Lucas once again didn't know what to say.

Noah's gaze was clear, the boy didn't seem to blink as much as Lucas was use to, his unwavering stare burned, when Lucas didn't speak Noah continued, "you and Brooke are friends but you're getting married to-" he paused to think, "-Peyton"

"Yes. Peyton and I are getting married in a few months" the next words fell out naturally "before the baby is born"

"Oh" Noah's mouth formed a perfect O shape, he blinked, looking back down at the open page Noah added "I didn't know that"

Lucas regretted telling Noah in that way, he winced and tried to turn it back around, "yeah, you're going to be a big brother, it's still a long time away though. I'm a big brother, my brother Nathan lived with our dad and his mum and I lived with my Mum"

"Zeus' father ate all his children"

-x-

When Brooke returned to the library she found Lucas and Noah at a familiar corner Brooke had spent much time with Noah at. It was his studying space, Lucas grinned as Noah answered each question correctly yet the boy was as serious as ever.

For ten minutes Brooke joined in and then she gently caught Noah's attention, though she appeared calm on the inside Brooke was nervous as she explained to Noah that he was now able to go home with her and that they wanted to take him with them the next day.

"You can say goodbye to everyone here tomorrow first" Lucas reassured Noah.

"And I will live at another school?" Noah frowned.

Brooke shook her head, placing her hand close to Noah, she smiled "No, kiddo. You're coming to live with me, during the day you'll be going to your new school then your dad or I will pick you up. Remember I've got your room all ready"

Lucas leaned forward, his hand going over Brooke's, "and if you ever need anything, your Mom and I are will be there for you" for a moment he looked at Brooke and sent a small smile her way with a squeeze of his hand. Her breath hitched, Brooke felt frozen, Lucas looked back at Noah and his smile grew.

Their fingers began to tingle, Lucas pulled his hand away, the warmth remained. Noah with his clear green eyes nodded solemnly, and though it was not obvious Brooke would swear that there was something different about Noah, something lighter.

-x-

 _So, I am not a lawyer or a social worker and I have no experience in the area of fostering and that. Nor am I an American so I know even less about the system over there so I am winging that side of this story completely. Totally for artistic purposes._

 _Noah is officially Brooke's now and Lucas has finally met his son. Soon the three of them will be back in Tree Hill. How do you see Noah moving to Tree Hill going?_


	10. Chapter 10

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting. I do own a baseball bat in case someone breaks in and I need to intimidate some losers, all 4ft9 of me.**

 **Once again I'm not sure who I personally replied to with reviews, I had to send my laptop away to get fixed so it's been ages and I'm not sure who I replied to or not. So I will reply here anyway.**

 **Thanks to Brucas, Diane, Callison, bjq and the guests. I am sorry your responses didn't get feedback sooner.**

 **There were also some reviews that addressed the speed of my updates, look though a part of me is sorry I cannot always guarantee quick updates, life happens, I am an independent single and devoted mother, time is not always easy to find and when I don't have a working computer and my internet isn't working I have even less time to write. Yes I updated the last chapter in a week, I fought to put a lot of any free time I had to writing that chapter because the readers took the time to review and I like to stick to my word. All in all the better the response from you guys the better the response from me, that being said sometimes shit just happens and I can't update. Hopefully, gods I hope I haven't jinxed myself, my laptop will stay in good working order, my last two f'd it within a year I was literally in tears when my new one had issues again but I was lucky enough to quickly back everything up.**

 **But here's my promise, if I get 20 reviews for a chapter within a week of it being posted I will then update by the end of the following week of that (meaning within a fortnight of the update) unless I physically cannot do so.**

Chapter Ten

The keys jingled in the lock, the only sound in the quiet as Brooke opened the door. She stepped inside holding it open to let Noah and Lucas in, Noah's steps were slow and cautious, his crisp white polo was buttoned all the way and he wore navy pants, Brooke thought he looked severe in his clothes and it hit Brooke for a moment how out of place the boy looked in her house.

Lucas dropped all the luggage by the door, huffing as the weight left him, "home, sweet home" he smiled for Noah's benefit, "where do you want me to put all this?"

"Just leave it" she waved her hand nonchalantly and the closed the door before looking at Noah, "is it alright if I take some photos?"

Noah quietly nodded and Brooke told both of them to sit on the couch, when asked to smile the boy didn't open his mouth yet his dimples still came on show. Lucas held the phone out to capture the three of them together, Noah sitting between them with Brooke's and Lucas leaning towards him. Brooke quickly took a few snaps of Lucas with Noah and he returned the favour before Brooke asked Lucas to take one of her with him.

A grin split Brooke's face, deep dimples on show, it beamed and seemed even bigger next to Noah's more subdued smile. For a moment Lucas froze, unable to move as he stared at the image waiting to be taken on the phone. Shaking his mind back to the present Lucas quickly took a few photos before handing the phone back to Brooke.

"Thanks" she said taking the phone in hand, her eyes didn't even look at Lucas as she did so and Lucas' smile dropped.

"Hey Noah, what do you feel like? Chinese, pizza, burgers, pasta?" Brooke quickly asked, her attention solely on the boy, "I'll get it delivered while we settle in, maybe put your things away"

Watching them together Lucas felt apart from them, as if he was standing outside looking through the window instead of sitting right next to them. It was a strange and empty feeling, Lucas could acknowledge he was slightly jealous of the progress Brooke had made with Noah when their son still treated Lucas like a stranger in the background.

As his mind wandered Lucas missed the conversation between mother and son, the next thing he knew Brooke was repeating his name over and over again.

"Sorry?"

"I asked what toppings do you want?"

"I'm happy with whatever you two want"

"I might even let you have mushrooms" Brooke sauntered off to order dinner and Lucas asked Noah to help him take his bags into Noah's new bedroom.

Lucas was amazed at how much the room had changed, Brooke had done a fantastic job in such a short time of creating a fun and safe space for Noah and though it wasn't the typical little boy room Lucas could see Noah's eyes light up at all the small details.

Noah only had two suitcases, only half of one had clothes in it, Lucas went and collected the box left in the car with Noah's books inside.

Soon the three of them had finished placing the books in place and neatly folding the clothes away and Brooke and Noah went to have a shower while Lucas waited for the pizza delivery. Hearing the running water as he sat on the couch Lucas tapped his fingers against his knees trying to think of things to say o Noah when the boy came out.

Lucas didn't know if it was just the nerves that made him bumble so much in front of his son, the young boy had such knowing eyes yet he was mostly silent leaving Lucas to feel like he _had_ to say something while the boy's eyes studied him so carefully.

-x-

Alone together in the kitchen Peyton sat on the counter top chewing on a carrot slice Haley had already cut while the other woman continued preparing dinner, brown eyes returning to the blonde every thirty seconds to check on Peyton.

Peyton gave a loud sigh, "it feels so weird being at home with Lucas so far away"

"You're welcome here anytime" Haley replied not giving anything away, only ten minutes earlier Brooke had texted Haley a single picture that had Haley jump on the spot, a picture of Brooke with Noah sitting on Brooke's couch and soon a small text followed. _Everything went great, I'll tell you everything later. We're going to have dinner with Noah and then I'll pick Sam up, I want it to be a surprise xxx_

"He hasn't even called me yet, I got a text yesterday saying everything was fine and that's it"

"He's distracted Peyton, once things settle down I'm sure he will get back to you"

Peyton didn't say anything, she gave another huff and Haley hid her smile knowing her friend was trying not to explode. Eventually Peyton spoke again, her eyes voiding Haley "has he been talking to you? It's just he doesn't like talking about it all with me"

"No" Haley carefully watched Peyton while she continued to peel and chop, "but I know he and Nathan have been talking a lot"

"That's good" though Peyton was nodding the downward expression on her face contradicted her words.

Haley placed the knife down, "do you think perhaps the reason Lucas doesn't want to talk to you about what is happening is because every time he looks at you no matter how cool and collected and supportive you are trying to be all he sees is the sad expression on your face"

"Is it that bad?"

Haley scoffed, "you look like someone killed your puppy and is dangling it in front of you and maybe that's not what Lucas needs" she quickly put the salad together before she continued "this is Lucas' son we are talking about-" Haley's words stopped when Peyton gave an audible scoff and Haley sent Peyton a look she had never seen her send anyone except Jamie when he was in trouble.

"Don't give me that look" Peyton defended herself.

"Somebody has to before you say or do something you will regret" Haley looked away shaking her head as she did so, moving around the kitchen while Peyton talked.

"I can't be the only one who questions it. Everyone is jumping on the bandwagon, this has devastated our lives and it will only devastate Lucas more to fall in love with this boy and then discover it's not his son" she kept her eyes on Haley, when she jumped off the counter Haley laid the plates on top instead.

The last plate rested on the counter with a clank, Haley looked Peyton right in the eye, her tone stern "the only one devastated is you" then her demeanour softened "I am not saying this to hurt you, Peyton. You're the only one thinking what if he isn't Luke's because as much as you wish that was true there's no reason Brooke would say he was if she wasn't sure, she has nothing to gain and everything to lose by claiming Noah is Luke's"

"I'm not saying she is lying but maybe Brooke is wrong"

After a few seconds Haley gave Peyton a pitying smile "she sent me a picture" and grabbed Peyton's hand "he looks just like Luke did when he was little. Noah is Lucas' son. An innocent little boy who is making Lucas _happy_ even before Lucas came face to face with him, and yes its messy and complicated and there's more than just joy in this for Luke, Brooke and everyone, and I get this is not easy, least of all for you but Peyton in the grand scheme of things its just not about you" Haley tried to make the last part sound light hearted and she quickly winced before adding while she squeezed Peyton's hand "and don't get me wrong I want to be your friend in this too but you're successful, strong, in love, pregnant and getting marries, and none of that is changing. You are in a _good_ place, Noah shouldn't take away from all the reasons you should be happy and I think it would be better if you focus on all those great things and remember every time you feel down about Noah coming here that he is a reason for happiness too, for a lot of people you love and he can be that for you as well"

Frustration filled Peyton, she snatched her hand away from Haley "I just don't feel happy. You think I want to feel like this?" raw emotion filled her voice, "I feel like everything I know has been turned upside down. I don't know my best friend anymore, Lucas feels like he is miles away even when he is standing across from me and everyone wants me to smile and act like this is normal. It's not normal. I am allowed to be angry, I am allowed to be upset and confused, I am allowed to ask questions. Nothing about this is normal"

"When has anything ever been normal around here?" Haley rolled her eyes, "Stalkers, kidnappers, teen pregnancies, it's all just another day here"

Peyton's mouth fell open in shock and then she gave a quick laugh, looking at Haley she laughed again.

"It's easier for you, it's not happening to you" Peyton defended herself once her laughter stopped, the smile left over was a little wry and sad.

"It could have been. Nathan was no saint before we got together, I'm surprised he hasn't gotten a knock on his door yet. I've thought about it, if things had been different hell it could have been Brooke or you making that knock"

"Thinking about it and going through it is very different, how would you really feel if Noah was Nathan's?"

"You're right but I don't think I'll be angry, I understand and feel for Brooke and Luke hasn't done anything wrong. Noah was conceived before you and Lucas were ever together, they were both so young and let's not forget the mess their break ups were with you in the middle of it. And he's this innocent little boy, I think we should all be grateful we get this second chance to be part of his life"

Peyton shook her head, she wasn't sure why she was angry, whether it was that Brooke had ever been pregnant in the first place or that Brooke had kept it a secret, "it's six years too late"

"Six years the three of you had to grow up and sort things out" Haley's tone was gentle but firm as she started to plate dinner, her eyes not meeting Peyton as they stayed on her own movements "sometimes I think it's a good thing Noah wasn't around for it all" she shook her head as she thought about it, "I wouldn't say that to them, they've missed so much of Noah's life but maybe it's something you need to think about" and with a smile Haley finished the last plate, "all done!"

Silently Peyton helped Haley, following her friend while her mind went over everything Haley had said.

-x-

Slightly bored Lucas started walking around Brooke's house, popping his lips as he looked around the room, with a smile Lucas picked up the purple monkey Brooke had placed on one of her shelves and he gave a chuckle when he remembered a day he's spent with Brooke and Angie months ago.

Eventually Lucas found himself staring at Brooke's fridge door, his brow furrowed as he looked at all the pictures on display. He was on there three times; a photo of the two of them with Angie, a photo of them with Jamie at his first birthday party and an old photo of them together with Peyton from junior year while Brooke and Lucas were still dating. It was the last photo that Brooke looked at the longest, he frowned wondering if Brooke had been pregnant in that photo, wondering why Brooke had kept such a photo and put it on display. It looked innocent, three friends arm in arm, yet looking at their young smiles Lucas felt shame and the youthful mistakes he had made, at the pain they had all experienced.

Other photos were on display, Lucas looked at the photos of his sister that Brooke had and spent an extra moment on the photo of his mother with Lily. The conversation he had to have with his mother in the near future was one that filled Lucas with nerves, even if he hadn't known about the baby Lucas still feared his mother would be reminded of Dan and if he remembered those days before Brooke had lied about not being pregnant Lucas could also remember the sharp sting of his mother's slap.

There was a loud enthusiastic knock on the door, Lucas moved away from the kitchen and left the memories behind. When Lucas swung the door open he was surprised to see a familiar face, he groaned.

"Lucas Scott!" Tim shouted, "man, I can't believe it. I got your pizza" he held the box forward, "wow, this is a nice place you got"

Before Tim could walk inside Lucas widened his stance, "Tim, how are you?"

"Good, good" his grin was too large, "hey, I heard you got married"

About to say something Lucas stopped when Brooke's voice called out from her room, "Luke, is that the pizza? Let me get dressed and I'll get some money"

"I've got it" Lucas called back, turning to yell at Brooke before facing Tim again.

The other man looked shocked, "Brooke Davis? Nice dawg. Bevin always thought you would marry Peyton but I'm with you dude" he chuckled, " _nice_ , Brooke's got a great ra-"

Gritting his teeth Lucas grabbed the pizza box and gave a harsh "don't say it" and quickly stuffed a note into Tim's hand.

"I'm just saying, she is fine, I would-"

"Bye Tim" Lucas slammed the door shut.

With a fresh face and big smile, a damper Brooke bounced into the room, "is Noah out yet?" and she crossed the room to take the pizza from Lucas, he watched as she took a deep sniff, "smells good"

Lucas placed his hands in his pickets, "he was changing into his pyjamas a minute ago, I'll go get him" and leaving Brooke he went to Noah's room.

The door was slightly ajar, Lucas gave a quick nod before poking his head in, "hey, pizza is here".

Sitting on the edge of his bed Noah sat motionless, eyes staring blankly at the opposite wall, Lucas stepped into the room, "you okay?"

"Fine, sir"

"You know, I'm not really a sir kind of a guy"

"Sorry" Noah looked at Lucas, his hands sitting politely in his lap.

Lucas sat next to Noah, the mattress barely sinking underneath him, "you don't need to say sorry. What are you thinking about? "

A crease formed at the top of Noah's nose, he brows narrowed, "I don't know what to do"

"About what?"

"With my time. I don't have school tomorrow and I don't have my classes. What am I meant to do?"

"Ah" Lucas sighed, "well I guess you can do anything you want to do"

Noah stared at Lucas, he gave his father a doubtful look, "obviously I cannot do _anything_ I want, that is improbable"

Unable to help himself Lucas chuckled, "okay well first you have to eat pizza and knowing Brooke we better hurry before she eats it all. Come on, let's go eat, we can figure out what's next as we go" without thinking Lucas placed a hand on Noah's shoulder, as soon as Noah stiffened Lucas realised where his hand was but just before he was about to remove his hand Noah's body relaxed and Lucas lifted his hand as he stood to lead the way.

Though Lucas couldn't see Noah follow him he still felt the boy's presence behind him the entire way.

-x-

There was little flavour in the food Peyton was tasting, she knew it was not for lack of trying, anything Peyton currently ate tasted like cardboard. Her stomach turned, Peyton shifted the dinner around her plate with her fork.

The table was oddly silent, Nathan and Haley tried to make conversation it always ended in the same awkward silence. Sam swallowed her last mouthful, "so… is it just me or is this really awkward?"

"Sam, eat your dinner" Haley smiled.

"I did and as riveting as the conversation has been can I please be excused?" Sam rolled her eyed as she spoke.

Haley almost chocked, "sure, I know you have a paper due this week so why don't you work on that" and then when the teenager was gone Haley smiled at Peyton "sorry, you know how surly teenagers can be"

"She was just telling the truth" Peyton stabbed her dinner.

They fell back into silence until Jamie shifted in his seat, "what does awkward mean?"

"Sam was just being silly" Nathan tried to change the subject but Jamie looked between his parents with confusion.

Peyton slowly placed her knife and fork down, "it means when something happens that makes you feel uncomfortable, like the feeling you get when you're caught in a lie"

"Oh" Jamie thought about it for a second, "is it because nobody's talking?" Jamie sighed loudly, "everyone is always whispering and acting funny"

Peyton straightened up, she looked between Nathan and Haley, "Jamie doesn't know?"

"Mama says I'm a know it all" Jamie grinned.

Nathan sent his son a smile as Haley shook her head at Peyton, "we wanted to wait until Brooke and Lucas were back"

"Is Uncle Luke marrying Aunt Brooke now?" Jamie spoke up causing the three adults to react instantly, Nathan almost choking, Haley dropping her utensils and throwing her hands up and Peyton locking her jaw.

Avoiding meeting Peyton steely glare Haley smiled sweetly at her son, "why would you ask that?"

"Because he went away with Peyton and they came back engaged and now he has gone away with Aunt Brooke, and Peyton hit Aunt Brooke _and_ when I asked Uncle Luke if he loved Aunt Brooke he said it was a long story" he rubbed his chin "and when I ask you and Dad what is going on you say it's a long story" his eyes were huge as he explained his reasoning, ending with an expression that clearly said _nuh duh._

Peyton's chair made a loud screech when in anger she pushed it back, she stood for a moment before Haley stood and reached over to still her, "Peyton, he's five"

"I think I should go. Thanks for dinner"

It was Nathan who followed Peyton out, Haley gave Jamie a disapproving look and the boy shrugged, "what?"

Shaking her head with an exasperated smile Haley started collecting plates, "help me clean up".

When Nathan returned Haley sent her husband a look, "she's okay…just needs time" he replied and then Nathan playfully shook Jamie's shoulders, "and I think we need to have a talk with this little guy"

"What did I do?" Jamie groaned but soon laughed when Nathan lifted him up and started spinning him around the room until the father placed the boy back to the floor outside the door, "go get ready for bed and we will meet you upstairs" he gave the boy a pat on the bottom as Jamie ran away.

Alone they faced each other, without saying a word Nathan moved to Haley and helped her, the two moving in sync with each other and soon the kitchen was clean and Nathan pulled Haley into a kiss, soft at first they started to deepen it. Haley's found herself trapped between the wall of Nathan's chest and the sink, her hands ran through his short dark hair "okay, slow it down cowboy" she managed to get out, her breathing shallow.

"Like this?" Nathan grinned against her skin, slowly trailing kisses from Haley's mouth down to her neck, spreading the blouse open so he could finish his trail at her collar bone.

There was a cough, "I'm ready for bed"

Nathan stilled and Haley looked over his shoulder, still shaky the mother grinned "right, okay Jamie let's get you to bed" and then low enough that only Nathan could hear Haley whispered while she placed her hand against his chest to push him away, brushing against him "and then we can see about putting you to bed" she winked.

"Let's go" Nathan clapped sweeping Haley up and chasing Jamie upstairs.

The levity remained while they tucked Jamie into bed and then they sat down on his bed with Jamie between them, the boy anxiously eyeing his parents.

"So we have something to tell you that will be a bit of a surprise about your Uncle Lucas and Aunt Brooke but it's something we are very excited about" Nathan didn't know quite what to say next and with his hand propped beside him he sent Haley a look.

Taking over from her husband Haley rubbed Jamie's kneed from above his duvet, "remember when you asked Uncle Lucas about Aunt Brooke and he said it was a long story, see a long time ago before you were even born they did love each other..." Haley stopped and winced at her words, "they still do love each other but not in the same way as they did in high school when they dated but sometimes love is complicated and theirs changed, _but-_ " she popped the last word, her eyes growing "when they stopped dating Aunt Brooke found out she was going to have a baby and she went away for a little while and had a little boy who was named Noah"

Jamie looked confused, "Aunt Brooke doesn't have a baby"

"That's because when she gave birth to Noah she was still so young and Aunt Brooke thought she couldn't be the best mommy for Noah so she found another Mom and Dad for the baby but the thing is that Mom and Dad changed their mind and Brooke was never told until just a few weeks ago and you know your Aunt Brooke, she straight away decided she wanted to bring her baby home and give him all the love she could"

Nathan continued explaining, "see buddy that's why Uncle Lucas and Aunt Brooke went away, they are bringing their little boy home. His name is Noah, he is six years old and is going to live with Brooke from now on."

The expression on Jamie's young face was of disbelief, he looked between his parents again, "so Aunt Brooke is a mom and Uncle Luke is his dad?"

"Yeah, you're going to have a big cousin"

"This is so weird" and then he grinned "and so cool!"

Nathan and Haley smiled at each other, "that's good, we feel the same" Haley laughed grabbing Nathan's hand and looking into his blue eyes after watching Jamie light up with those same baby blues as his father made something awaken in Haley and she dreamt of more little Nathan's to light up her world.

-x-

Laughter bubbled up inside Lucas as he watched the look of concentration on Brooke's face, it was a rolling emotion yet Lucas fought to keep his face straight as Brooke stared at the board, her brow was kinked and her bottom lip was tucked in as she bit it.

Lucas placed his tiles down and Brooke gave a loud sigh while her eyes flittered around.

The three of them were sprawled on the floor of the living room, the furniture pushed aside, with a scrabble board in the middle of them. Noah's legs kicked the air, Lucas had noticed whenever Noah settled on what word he was creating his legs stilled, and though there was no denying the boy was his the expressions on his face resembled Brooke to such a degree Lucas could barely believe they hadn't been together in over sixe years.

After a minute of waiting for Brooke to have her turn Noah handed her the booklet, "there's a list of two letter words in here" his tone sweetly helpful and Lucas let his chuckle out.

Smiling Brooke glared at Lucas before telling Noah she was fine.

Another minute went by and Noah excused himself to go to the bathroom, Lucas checked the scores and was impressed at how well Noah was doing though Lucas himself was still in the lead.

"You can always pass"

"I'm not going to pass" Brooke hissed and then placed four tiles down.

Lucas laughed again, "you can't put that down"

"It's a word" she smirked.

Lucas raised his brow, "an inappropriate word"

"It's all I have"

"Noah is six"

"And he used the word mated" she rolled her eyes, "it's just a word"

" _Brooke!_ "

"It's 51 points! 51! I need it. Do you know how many words I could have done, I had an f and u before, Lucas, give me this" there was a slight whine to her voice.

"Fine" Lucas laughed again and shook his head as he replaced the i with a blank tile from his own row "we are pretending its ducks"

"Deal" Brooke happily went to the tile bag and grabbed the last remaining tile, "well I think I've officially lost" there was no hint of disappointment in her voice; Lucas could see the joy in her eyes. Noah quickly returned and soon the game was over, Noah packed away without complaint and merely nodded when Brooke said it was bed time. Together Brooke and Lucas took Noah to his room, the boy turned before hopping into his bed "may I read before bed?"

"Ten minutes" Brooke agreed and then bent down "I am really happy that you're here"

Sounding as polite as ever Noah gave a little nod, "thank you" and then after a pause, "it is very nice here" and though Brooke smiled at her son Lucas stiffened at Noah's words and reserved tone.

They both bid the boy goodnight and then left the room, Lucas let out a heavy sigh when they returned to the living room.

Reading his body language Brooke frowned, "you okay?"

"Sometimes I just feel that something is… off, not quite right. Maybe I am expecting too much" he looked away, his hand running through his short hair "I guess I just thought it would be different"

"Give him time, give yourself time" Brooke placed her hand on his bicep and squeezed gently, "he doesn't know us but that's going to change. It will, Luke"

Her hand had started to rub his arm, the action second nature, neither one even noticed it as they talked until the room turned silent and their eyes came face to face. The warmth of her hand on his arm burned them, Brooke was quick to drop her hand and step back, "I better go get Sam" and she left without looking at Lucas again.

Exhausted Lucas sat on the couch and before he knew it he was startled awake, over an hour had gone by but the house was quiet. Lucas checked if Brooke's car was back and then went to look on a sleeping Noah, standing in their son's bedroom doorway Lucas got out his phone and sent Brooke a quick text, _everything ok? Just woke up and saw time._

The reply came quick. _Sorry! Got talking to Haley, will leave soon. It's late just take my room and I will crash with Sam if you want._

Lucas sent back a quick okay and then looked around; he sighed again and gave in not knowing if it was the right decision. Slightly weary and unsure Lucas entered Brooke's bedroom and began to undress, it was surprisingly clean except for the clothes that Brooke had worn on the trip home, the items made a trail to the en-suite ending with Brooke's lacy bra peeking out. Not trying to think about it Lucas collected the clothes and threw them on top of the bra, closing the adjoining door so they were out of site and folded his own by the bed. In only his trunks Lucas slipped beneath the sheets and started to drift off once again, a smile on his lips as a familiar smell from the pillow had him snuggle in deeper.

-x-

 _ **So that's the tenth chapter. Back in Tree Hill. I originally was going to show some more Cali time but this is what came out instead. And I just had to have Jamie throw some more spanners at Peyton.**_


	11. Things I'll Never Say

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, and I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting. I do own four forks, only four, I really need more forks. Tonnes of knifes and spoons but I'm always running out of forks.**

 **Next chapter is here. I would like to thank my awesome reviewers and readers; Noahs, Callison, Brooke, bjq, BrookeLucas, salazarjasam, boblina, brucas, diane and the guests reviews. For the guests if you put your nickname or something I can reply more directly. Thanks for your words, I am sensing the peyton hate but it's all good I do not like writing LP I just need them together until I can naturally split think. Wouldn't want it to be as shit as… well you watched the show, BL are better than that.**

Chapter Eleven

For a moment, the briefest of seconds, when Noah woke up for the first time in his new room he was startled and though there was no sound that escaped, his eyes quickly grew, his fingers tightened on the sheet underneath.

The moment slowly faded and realisation soaked through, Noah's body relaxed and the room became warmer as he let his anxiety go. This was his bed, in his room and in his home. Noah felt strange, he never really thought about the word home or about having a family. Noah recognised he had people who cared about him and there were also people who took care of him, sometimes the boy felt uncomfortable with how Brooke and Lucas looked at him, Noah had never been looked at in the intense way his new parents did.

There was comfort for Noah knowing where he was and he remained in bed still for longer than normal, he did not know what to do next or what the day had ahead of him so Noah stayed where it was simple. After ten minutes Noah could not stand it any longer, he quickly got out of bed and made it behind him. Noah left his pyjamas at the foot of the bed and then dressed himself before quietly leaving his room.

The house was silent, the living area empty, Noah turned back and gently opened Brooke's bedroom door to look inside. Brooke was not there though Noah saw Lucas asleep in the bed and left his father alone again.

It was Brooke who joined him first, twenty minutes later she came down from upstairs, her hair out and damp, and a dimpled smile appeared automatically when she saw Noah reading at the kitchen table, "morning, you're up early"

Noah closed his book and shifted so his knees were resting on the chair and he straightened himself up to look at Brooke, "it's seven thirty"

"I like this" she wiggled her index finger in his direction, "you're going to be easy on school mornings, be prepared for Sam" and just the thought of her foster daughter in the morning had Brooke turning on the coffee machine, she looked over her shoulder as she did so "you want anything?"

"May I please have water?"

"Sure, come over here" she answered and Noah joined her, Brooke showed him around the kitchen and grabbed a glass, she went to the fridge "whenever you want you can have a drink, you don't need to ask"

Brooke felt like humming as she went about her morning but resigned herself to a small secret smile, Sam came down the stairs just as breakfast was cooked, hair a mess and looking like she had just crawled out of bed and was still half asleep, wordlessly Brooke handed Sam a coffee.

"Noah this is Sam, she can be scary in the mornings but she is really a big softie" Brooke watched as her newly reunited son met her foster daughter.

The teenager sized up the skinny boy at the table, "so you're the kid" she cupped her mug and took a look gulp, "welcome home" and sat down next to Noah.

"Hello" Noah shifted putting himself an inch further away from Sam.

She eyed the book Noah was reading, "what'cha got there?"

"It's about the world's deadliest animals"

"Right… so what should I look out for?"

Noah had closed his book and Brooke started to bring breakfast over, he thanked Brooke before answering Sam, "are you allergic to bee stings?"

Sam shrugged, "wouldn't have a clue" she turned her attention to Brooke, "this looks good, thanks Brooke"

"Eat fast, you still need to get ready for school" Brooke said as she sat down across from the kids.

"Yeah, yeah" Sam finished her coffee before touching her food, bantering with Brooke as they all ate. As predicted Sam left getting ready to the last minute, flushed and in a rush Brooke silently slipped into her own room to retrieve a pair of heels.

On the bed Lucas lay still fast asleep and Brooke did her best not to wake him, avoiding looking at the slumbering form she tip toed to the walk in closet and heels in hand started back out. Lucas rolled over, an arm flinging out, the blanket bunched bellow his belly button revealing his bare chest. The sigh he made had Brooke freeze to see if Lucas was awake, her eyes glanced at his closed lids and then ran down his body and before she knew it Brooke was staring.

Inside her mind Brooke wolf whistled, she hadn't seen Lucas topless since high school and against her will couldn't help but appreciate that he had become more chiselled in these unseen areas. Her head tilted, Brooke smirked and then as Lucas rolled onto his side, his hand rising to rest near his head, Brooke jumped at the sudden move and forced herself to look away and tip toe the rest of the way out.

The children were calm as Brooke became more stressed after realising the time, she loaded the car up, the new booster seat took Brooke barely any time to set up and Noah clipped himself in as Sam slipped into the front passenger seat seconds before Brooke hopped in and started the car, "everyone ready?".

-x-

The first thing Lucas noticed when he slowly woke was the silence, he didn't want to get up, the bed was soft and welcoming, and it's warmth an escape from the day. Lucas could not remember the last time he had slept so well, he opened his eyes and stretched.

When he finally dragged himself out of bed Lucas checked the time, he swore and quickly put on his pants to leave the room. The house was empty, realising he was alone Lucas quickly found a note on the kitchen counter.

 _Taken Sam to school, breakfast is in the microwave if you are hungry and I left your bag on the couch – Brooke_

Lucas grabbed his overnight bag from the couch and headed back towards Brooke's room, he had just started running the shower when he heard the door opening. Leaving the water running Lucas went to say good morning to Brooke and Noah.

Stepping back into the living area Lucas' smile dropped, "what the fuck!"

"What are you doing here?"

They spoke in unison. Julian was standing in the entry way, his arms full. Lucas threw Julian's question back at him, "what are you doing here?"

Feeling awkward Julian looked towards the windows instead of in the direction of where Lucas stood in only a pair of pants, he could hear the shower running in the background "Brooke lets me work here when she is out of town, sorry I thought… I thought… I'm just going to leave" he backed up.

Something stopped Lucas from saying anything, he knew it was irrational but Lucas was angry and he glared at Julian until the door shut behind him and Lucas was alone again.

Seeing Julian inside Brooke's house had soured the morning for Lucas and his previous happy and relaxed mood vanished, his entire shower Lucas was still glaring, he mumbled to himself as he quickly dressed and repacked his bag to go home.

When the door opened again Lucas instantly knew it was Brooke, her laughter filled the house sending shivers down his spine.

Clean and dressed he met them in the kitchen, "morning" though a part of Lucas envisioned Noah squealing and running into his arms Lucas accepted Noah's reserved smile and simple "good morning"

As Brooke came close she gave her own good morning and Lucas automatically brushed a light kiss on her cheek, "how's Sam?" he asked.

"She's good. I talked to Haley last night. They've talked to Jamie about Noah and I asked if we could borrow their pool today" she stopped and looked to Lucas "if you're okay with that? I just thought it would give us somewhere private to have fun later"

"What do you think?" Lucas asked Noah and when the boy nodded Lucas looked back at Brooke, "okay. I'm going to go home this morning though; I'll pick you guys up after lunch"

Brooke frowned, she folded her arms, "I could meet you there"

"No, it's on the way" he gave her a confused look not knowing how else to respond to her desire to avoid doing things together, he gave a shake of his head and walked away, "why are you fighting this?"

Her arms tightened further around herself, "I'm not fighting anything" her tone was more defensive than she had intended and Brooke forced her body to relax, "fine, you can pick us up. Do you want me to drive you back home?" she offered with a fake smile, they both knew it offer wasn't sincere, Brooke asked with the hope Lucas would say no.

Lucas saw the defiance and lack of sincerity in her eyes and he put on the sweetest smile to reply, "I would love that, thankyou Brooke" and inside he laughed when he saw the answering flash of anger in Brooke.

"That's just great" he words appeared positive but they both knew she said it with sarcasm, "give me five minutes".

The look of anger she gave him was still on Lucas' mind when he walked through his own front door, entering his bedroom Lucas dropped his bag and chuckled. He knew it shouldn't amuse him but riling Brooke up both frustrated and excited him.

Lucas kicked off his shoes and fell back onto the bed, he stared up at the ceiling, his head only lifted when his name was called, "Luke?"

By the time Peyton appeared in the doorway Lucas was sitting up, "hi" he gave a slow, lazy smile, "how's my beautiful girl going?"

Peyton's grinned, "why didn't you tell me you were back!" she rushed over and landed on top of Lucas bringing him back down flat on the mattress, her lips stole a quick kiss, "I missed you"

"I missed you too but I didn't have much spare time, it moved so fast and then we brought Noah home yesterd-"

"Wait, yesterday? You got back yesterday" Peyton's smile dropped, she untangled herself and stood above Lucas hands on hips, "and you didn't think to let me know?"

"I wanted to surprise you and I didn't want you to worry"

Lucas tried to touch Peyton but she brushed his hand aside and stepped back, "so where have you been?"

"With Noah, getting to know my son"

"At Brooke's?"

Lucas scoffed "yes, at Brooke's. It was late and I was tired so Brooke let me crash there"

"That sounds cosy" her voice dripped with sarcasm, "how kind of her. And where exactly did you sleep?"

For a second Lucas froze and even as it left his lips he felt guilty for the lie, "on the couch" he briefly looked away, "I thought you were at work, I wanted to surprise you tonight. Make you dinner, focus on just us for a little while" he smiled warmly and gently rested his palms on Peyton's slim hips.

The words made Peyton's stomach roll, she didn't want the focus on them to be a sidenote but at the same time she remembered what Haley had said the night before hand so she did her best to appear happy, "that sounds perfect" she smoothed the shirt over his chest and cupped his shoulder before closing her eyes and kissing Lucas again.

After a few seconds Lucas pulled away to get down on his knees, he lifted Peyton's shirt and placed a kiss on her stomach, "morning baby" his breath tickled Peyton's skin and she gave an involuntary giggle and pulled her shirt back down, "how are you feeling?"

"Great actually except my pants are getting tight so I grabbed a few bigger pairs"

Lucas stood, "you still look beautiful"

"And keep saying that even when I'm so big I can barely walk" she laughed at him and for just a moment Peyton forgot the rest of the world outside of the two of them and their baby, her light eyes shone and her smile came easy.

In that same moment Lucas' thought wandered elsewhere, his mind going back six years to another girl and another baby, and he couldn't help but wonder what the last months of Brooke's pregnancy had been like for her as she grew big with his baby.

The thought came back to him hours later as he swam in the pool with Noah, the silence between them oddly relaxing as they floated out the back of Nathan and Haley's house. There was a splash and Lucas looked up to see Brooke finally joining them. She walked down the steps in the shallow end, her hair out, in only a barely there black and gold bikini and unbidden time seemed to slow for Lucas as he watched her enter the water.

He felt like a teenager, Lucas dragged his eyes away and stood up in the water turning his back on the view and smiled at Noah, "ever played fish out of water?"

"No, how do we play?" he sounded his age, innocent and free, there was an ease to Noah when he was in the water that Lucas didn't see elsewhere, as if all his walls washed away.

Lucas was aware Brooke had swum near them, he could feel her presence to his left, and ignoring it he focused on Noah and explained the rules, he volunteered to go first and quickly regretted his choice of game as he and Brooke came into contact too many times for him to count. Fumbling through the game Lucas stopped regretting it when he heard Noah laugh.

The world seemed to stop, Lucas froze, Noah was splashing around trying to find them and the laugh that came from him had Lucas melt. Brooke watched on, she sat perched on the edge of the pool, feet dangling in the water. Brooke laughed at Lucas' rapt expression and Noah's joy, the sound had Noah turn in her direction and his own laughter stopped.

-x-

Towel wrapped around his waist Lucas stood waiting outside Nathan and Haley's guest room, his hair was damp and sticking up, droplets still running down his neck. He went to turn away and changed his mind again, hand up to knock the door swung upon and Brooke stepped out barrelling into Lucas, "what are you doing?" she yelled pushing him away.

"I'm sorry"

"You scared the life out of me. Where's Noah" Brooke placed her hand on her heart and took a deep breath. The shower had warmed her body up but she could still smell the chlorine in her hair, while Lucas watched she used the hair tie from her wrist and wrapped it in a messy bun, cursing him in her mind.

Lucas lifted a brow, "he found Haley's piano"

After straightening up Brooke glared at Lucas, "why are you just standing there, go get dressed"

"Why are you angry?"

She kinked her brow as she scoffed, "I'm not angry"

Without even realising he did it Lucas stepped forward, Brooke couldn't move because of the door she had closed behind her, "I need to talk to you" he hadn't intended to say it, "Julian let himself in when you were out this morning. He has his own keys?" his disapproval was clear.

"Why didn't you tell me earlier?"

"Does that matter? Some guy can just let himself into your house whenever he wants. You have two children there!"

"God, Luke. He didn't even know anyone was home, Julian uses my place to work when I'm away. It's not a big deal. I'll get the keys back now anyway, if it makes you feel better"

Face serious Lucas nodded "It does."

For a moment Brooke just stared at Lucas and then she shook her head, she went to speak but Lucas sent her a warning look and cut in, "don't say it. Whatever you're thinking, don't say it"

"I could say that back to you" she lowered her voice, "we're treading on thin ground here Luke, step back"

His chin lifted and Lucas realised how close they were, he didn't move.

-x-

The sound of the piano welcomed Nathan, he was surprised expecting Haley to be at work, and followed the sound only to stop when he saw the back of a small figure sitting at the piano.

Amazement and curiosity quickly vanished, it didn't take Nathan long to figure out who the guest in his house was and he left Noah to his music and went searching. Nathan paused at the end of the hallway, a greeting on the tip of his tongue that never made it out.

Something roared in Nathan's ears, like a siren warning of danger. They were too close, closer than he had seem them in years, with Brooke's body seemingly flat against the door behind her yet somehow leaning towards Lucas at the same time, while he stood right in front of her, towering over her smaller frame, with those Scott eyes staring unmoving at Brooke's face.

The mental alarm bells started ringing for Nathan, he went to speak but before they even noticed him Nathan saw Lucas blink and quickly step back, "you're right" he spoke and to Nathan's relief when Lucas whipped his towel off and slung it over his shoulders his swim shorts were revealed.

Brooke gave a nod and slipped away, turning her back on Lucas Brooke froze when she spotted Nathan watching them. For a split second there was a look akin to panic on her face and then she grinned, "Nate, hi! 

"Brooke… Lucas, how are you two?"

"I'm great, we went swimming with Noah" she clapped her hands, "ohmygod, do you want to meet him?"

Lucas has a dark expression on his face, "you guys go ahead, I'm going to have my turn in the shower" and he closed the bedroom door behind him as he disappeared.

With gusto Brooke grabbed Nathan by the arm, "come on"

As they walked together Nathan kept his eyes forward but he had to ask, "everything alright, Davis?"

"Of course"

He stopped and looked at her, "Brooke, is everything alright?"

She flicked her eyes to the right before looking at him, her big hazel eyes not blinking as she brushed him off "its fine, everything is under control" she let go of him and walked ahead.

-x-

"It was a little awkward but it was fine" Lucas shrugged and unloaded the groceries, "we just have to put everything else aside and do what is best for Noah"

Peyton nodded listening, "that's great. I can't wait to meet him" she tried to sound as cheery as she could, the thought made her nervous though and Peyton hoped meeting Noah would make things click into place for her.

Not answering Lucas remained silent as he finished unpacking, he grabbed the chopping board and the rest of the things he needed to cook Peyton dinner, "now the world vanishes and it is just you and me, together and alone" he kissed her moving her away from all the prep, "now sit down, relax, let me do all the work"

Peyton laughed as she sat down, enjoying all the attention, she watched Lucas move around. They started discussing baby names, finding little in common with their taste, laughing at the others most ridiculous suggestions.

"What about Blake, Blake Scott, it could be for a boy or a girl" Peyton suggested.

Lucas shook his head, taking a break from cooking he grabbed two wine glasses and filled them up and carried them over to Peyton, "I just don't see our kid as a Blake" he pulled a face and handed Peyton her glass, "non-alcoholic" he promised and took a few sips of his own drink.

"I like Anna too"

"After your mom, I do like that, and K-"

"And we could go Sawyer for a boy" Peyton said in a pleading tone causing Lucas to sigh, "I don't know why you don't like it, it's my name" she pointed to herself.

Instead of arguing Lucas had another sip and got back to the cooking, "at least we have many months to decide" he grabbed the spatula and pointed it at her, "I hope you're hungry!"

Peyton got a twinkle in her eye, she slowly placed her glass down and walked over to Lucas. First she took the spatula and then Peyton grabbed Lucas by his belt buckle and turned him around, backing him away from the kitchen counter, "oh I am, how about we let things simmer in here for a bit and go cook up our own storm" as soon as it came out Peyton frowned, "okay that sounded way sexier in my head"

"You sure?" Lucas let her lead him out of the room.

Nodding Peyton was half way to their room when there was a knock on the door, her face dropped; Lucas looked at the door and said "I better get that".

Peyton let go of Lucas, she brushed her golden blonde hair out of her face and sighed "or we could ignore it" but as soon as Peyton saw Lucas' expression she lifted her hands in defeat, "I'll go get it then".

Though she was slightly frustrated at the interruption it reminded Lucas of one of the reasons she loved Lucas -he was a good guy. The kind of person who would be there for a complete stranger if they needed him, who ran into fires to save his worst enemy or into a building with a shooter to make sure everyone is okay.

Trying to clear her mind Peyton swung the door open and her smile froze on her face. Slowly she began to grin, happiness overtaking the sudden anxiety, "I can't believe you're here!"

Lucas called out behind her, "who is it, honey?"

Peyton turned around, "it's your Mom"

The weight Peyton didn't even realise was on Lucas' shoulders seemed to just fall from him, walking fast Lucas rushed towards the front door.

Stepping out of the way Peyton watched mother and son embrace, placing a hand over her stomach Peyton softly smiled as she reflected on a mothers bond and dreamt of her own child, of the day she would get to hold her precious baby in her arms.

"What are you doing here?" Lucas was so happy to see him mother, Karen hugged Lucas again and motioned for him to let her inside.

"My boy calls and tells me he needs to see me, of course I came"

"Where are Andy and Lil?"

Karen waved her hand, "they're still in New Zealand, they'll join me next week but for now I am all yours. Now tell me what's all the urgency about?"

Not wanting to be part of this conversation Peyton told Lucas she would finish dinner and for him to talk to his mother. Lucas took Karen to the living room and they sat next to each other on the couch, Karen rubbed her knees, "Lucas is everything okay?"

He nodded, "yeah, it's great actually. There's just someone I wanted you to meet" and with a nervous smile Lucas switched to a photo of Noah on his phone and handed it to his mother, "this is Noah"

Karen saw the image and tentatively took the phone as her mouth slacked open, "oh my" she covered her mouth with one hand, "is this…?" she didn't know how to say it but she already knew the answer.

"My son" Lucas gave a sad smile, he was happy to have Noah yet was still conflicted over the past and how he felt about all the missing years.

Karen gave a little choke and dropped her hand, paying closer attention to the picture, "of course it is, he is a little mini you but how?" she lifted her eyes to Lucas, "My mind is just…"

"Trust me I know how you feel. It's a complicated story"

"Uncomplicate it for me, when? Who?

Lucas took his phone back, "junior year, he is six and well… remember when Brooke and I had the pregnancy scare" he trailed off and lifted his brow. Hands between his legs Lucas looked at the image on his phone and gave a little smile, "I just found out a week ago, a lot has happened since then"

"Brooke? When… I mean, did anyone know? How could none of us know, she lived with us" Karen laughed thinking back to that time. The older woman was in shock.

"She hid it, didn't tell anyone and gave birth in California over the summer. Brooke gave Noah up for adoption" and he explained the recent changes as Karen patiently listened, by the end Karen was giving Lucas a motherly side hug.

Lucas frowned "I'm okay with this" his face softened, "I really am. It was a lot at first and I still have a million things going through my mind but I can't help but look at Noah and just feel so happy"

"That's good. I am happy for you then" she rubbed his arm, "and Brooke, how is she?"

Lucas gave a sigh, "we're sorting through things. You know Brooke; doesn't want to look vulnerable. But Ma, Brooke's just a natural mother, she is great with him which simultaneously makes me grateful, amazed and kind of angry and jealous" he shook his head.

The words and expressions made Karen chuckle and as the mood lightened Karen licked her lips, "and how is Peyton taking it?"

"Well" Lucas huffed, "that's a different story".

 **-x-**

 _ **Next chapter: Karen is in Tree Hill, Brooke gets a proposition and it's time to party!**_


	12. Chapter 12

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, and I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting. I do own a miniature little blue and purple cap made out of light clay that I made during a craft day with my son because why not, and I did get a kick out of my son making his own copying mine down to the little B and L I put on it. Because any child of mine is going to be a BLer.**

 **Thank you to everyone who read, favourited and followed, and a bigger thanks to the reviewers who got me to update this in my deadline. I had to try extra hard today to make it before midnight of my fortnight deadline, wasn't easy as I've been sick and in pain this week but I am happy to say I managed with thirty minutes to spare. So thank you to the ever loyal Dianehermans, and bjq, and all the guests reviews. I have to hold back from spoiling anything, but yes Peyton really is pregnant this is due to the timing of the fic and I try to keep it as true to the show as I can outside my AU sl's, any differences I try to have reasoning to it. As to those questioning the paternity, I don't think it's too spoilerish to say yes it is also Luke's biological child but don;gt worry I don't ever plan to do any graphic LP sex scenes. I have to do them as a couple… for now mwahahahahahahahamwahahahah!**

Chapter Twelve

It was easier than Brooke expected watching Lucas drive away with Noah, with one hand blocking the sun from her eyes Brooke waved goodbye with the other as they drove down the street. The fact Lucas was so nervous made it easier for Brooke to happily let them go hoping that they had a good bonding experience at the park, and before Brooke could change her mind Sam was running down the steps, "ready?" the teen asked.

"Just let me lock up"

Sam grinned, "done and done" she pulled out Brooke's purse and keys from behind her back and quickly went to the car excited to be going to see Jack. A more sombre Brooke followed and unlocked vehicle, opening Sam's door for her before hopping in the other side.

As they drove they danced and sang along to the radio until Brooke turned the volume down, "I would like you home for dinner tonight"

With a groan Sam rolled her head back, "but it's the weekend! I can be home by midnight"

"Fine, home by ten"

"Killjoy. When were you ever home by ten at my age"

Brooke kinked her brow, "make it nine"

With a gasp Sam's lips parted as she stared at Brooke aghast, "you're meant to be the cool mom"

"I am the cool mom"

Sam glared at Brooke, "fine, ten"

"It's a deal if you are home by six every night this school week" and Brooke wanted to cheer at how Sam gave in, turning the volume back up Brooke continued to sing out of tune.

After Brooke dropped Sam off at the diner she headed to her store to focus on work while she had a chance, she had feared it would be hard to fall back into and that her mind would wander to other things however Brooke found it easy to lose herself into her designs.

An two hours flew by and Brooke was shocked to look up and see a subdued Julian walking in, "hi, what are you doing here?" she frowned.

Julian flinched, "our meeting? We confirmed this morning"

Gasping Brooke checked the time, "sorry I didn't realise it was so late already I was expecting some more time" she swung off her chair with a big dimpled smile, "but you are going to love what I have been working on" and she lifted the sketchpad "TADA"

"That's great" Julian lacklustre tone didn't go unnoticed by Brooke. Placing her designs down Brooke leant against her work desk, spreading her arms behind her. The move had Julian try his best not to lower his gaze all too aware of how the position drew attention to her breasts.

Brooke kinked her brow, "what's wrong?"

Lips tight together Julian battled with himself and for a second he went to speak his thoughts but instead shook his head "nothing" and held his lips tight again.

"Julian" frowning now Brooke took the steps to close the distance between them, "what is it?"

He shook his head again, "look, how you decide to live your life is not any of my business" and though his words were meant to show uncaring they came out disapproving especially matched with his stern expression.

Unused to this side of Julian and having no idea what he was on about Brooke sent him a confused look, "what are you talking about"

Something broke and Julian sidestepped Brooke and though she spun around to follow him he spoke with his back to her "Peyton is pregnant and they're engaged", at his words Brooke nodded, Julian turned back to her "I don't agree with what you and Lucas are doing and considering your own history with them I think you're better than being the other woman-"

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU ON ABOUT?" Brooke snapped, "what the hell has given you the impression that anything of that kind is happening between Lucas and I" she poked his chest, offended, _"me_ the other woman?" she scoffed her expression letting him know exacting what she thought about that idea.

Julian sucked in a breath, he looked to the ground, "perhaps Lucas didn't mention I came by yesterday but I was there, I saw Lucas"

"Okay" she stressed the word out and frowned again in confusion, straightening up Brooke continued "yes Lucas was at my place and he told me he saw you, wasn't happy about it actually, but that is besides the point. We flew in Wednesday and it was late by the time I got home with Sam, Lucas was there watching Noah so he crashed at my place. I have _no_ idea what you thought was happening-" her eyes widened "- but nothing happened."

The scenario stuck in his head Julian sent her a doubtful look, "he was naked coming from your room, I heard you in the shower. Like I said it's not any of my business but you don't have to lie to me"

"Oh my god! Seriously? Firstly, I don't need your opinion, secondly no matter what you think you know you are wrong and an idiot!" her arms flung in the air, "for your information I was not even there when you came by, I am guessing you disturbed _Lucas_ while he was having _his_ shower _alone_ while I took Sam to school. As I said, he stayed the night using my room while I stayed with Sam, god forbid he clean himself"

Julian's jaw dropped, he wanted to facepalm, "Brooke I am so sorry I-"

"Stop!" she raised her hand, "I think this tells me exactly what you think of me" Brooke was angry, her blood boiled, no matter what she felt Brooke would never let herself act in such an abhorrent way.

Feeling like he had put his foot in his mouth Julian quickly tried to make things right, he reached for Brooke but she broke away from him, "don't touch me"

"Brooke, I didn't mean it that way"

It hurt Brooke as well as making her angry, during these difficult months Brooke had felt herself starting to let her walls down with Julian, she trusted him and relied on him despite the short time they had known each other. Arms protectively hugging herself Brooke held the tears in as she walked towards the back room.

"Brooke" Julian followed her, "I am an idiot, I let my jealousy blind me. I was just taken aback when I saw Lucas like that and the way he spoke… I just… it made me crazy to even think it"

Slowly turning back to Julian she silently stood there as he continued.

"I really am sorry. This is not a reflection on you, this is on me. I'm a jealous idiot"

"So, you're jealous?" anger abating she kinked her brow playfully. Julian stepped closer and she made the final step between them, Brooke lifted her chin to look Julian in the eye "some people would say that means you must like me"

The large grin that seemed to weaken most girls split his face, "some people would be correct" his voice lowered.

"You should know I would never let anyone make me the other woman, I'm the main course not the side dish"

"I believe that" his face slowly began to lower.

Brooke felt her eyes closing and then the bell signally someone had walked in stopped Brooke and her attention went to behind Julian.

Everything else was forgotten as Brooke bounced up and down, her eyes lit up as she smiled and ran forward, "Ma!" the name slipped out automatically without Brooke even realising as she rushed to meet Karen and the two women embraced warmly.

Julian awkwardly watched forgotten by Brooke, their greetings were so excitable they barely sounded like real words. Finally, as they calmed Karen cupped Brooke's cheeks gently with her hands, "oh Brooke" she smiled kindly her smile reaching her eyes as they looked at each other.

Something broke inside Brooke and silent tears began to fall from her twinkly eyes, she smiled back at Karen feeling the older woman's love and warmth, "Karen, I am so glad you're here"

"My girl, I always knew you were brave I just never knew quite how much" she kissed Brooke's cheek and they hugged again.

It was Karen who remembered they were not alone, noticing Julian she stepped out of the hug but kept her arm around Brooke as she led her closer to Julian, "who is this young man"

Brooke laughed and wiped away her tears, "this is Julian Baker, he is producing Luke's movie, we were just going over the costume designs"

A knowing look appeared in Karen's eyes as she looked between the two and she gave a polite smile, "I see. It's nice to meet you Julian, I have heard many things about you"

Julian took the hand Karen held out and sending Brooke a sideways smile replied, "all good things I hope"

Without replying Karen simply gave a small smile and Brooke rested her head briefly on Karen's shoulder before introducing her, "Julian, this is one of the most amazing women in the world, Karen Roe, she is Luke's mom"

Julian had been confused by the warm welcome but had assumed this was Brooke's own mother despite the stories he had heard, he hid his shock quickly and turned on the charm, "for a second I thought such a beautiful woman must surely be Brooke's own mother, Lucas must sadly get his looks from his father" he made the last line sound joking.

Karen was not unaware of the rivalry between Julian and her own son, with a protective hand on Brooke's shoulder Karen was equally sweet and cutting, "I love Brooke as surely as I would if she was my own flesh and blood" and facing the younger woman again Karen added, "and it is a joy to know you really are family now, I can't wait to meet my beautiful grandbaby and I hope you don't mind if I invite myself tomorrow"

"Of course!"

"And I was hoping to steal you away for a late lunch if you haven't already eaten?"

Not knowing how to answer Brooke sent Julian a questioning look, he checked his watch "we're nearly done here, twenty minutes maybe"

"I could meet you somewhere in twenty?" Brooke then asked Karen.

With a nod Karen gave Brooke another hug, "I will get a table and message you where I am, see you soon Brooke" Karen let go and sent Julian a small wave, "nice to meet you, Julian"

"Likewise," Julian turned away to give them privacy as Brooke walked Karen out and soon Brooke had returned acting like they were never interrupted and as if the conversation they had earlier never happened, getting straight into work Brooke showed design after design, "I will make cheap prototypes and wait until the sizes needed are known before going any further"

"This all looks great"

"It helps I am pretty familiar with the inspiration" Brooke folded up the Ravens jersey she had already made, a far away smile on her face, then she gave a blink and handed Julian the garment, "this is for you"

"I'm an honorary Raven now?" he slipped it on.

Brooke smoothed the material over his chest, "I have a thing for good looking guys in uniform"

"Brooke" he stopped for her to meet his eyes, "maybe I could take you for lunch next week?"

A memory came back to Brooke, she put on a flirty smirk "will there be wine involved?"

"That can be arranged" he grinned, "just to clarify, I don't plan to talk about work. I know you have a lot going on right now and the last thing I want to do is complicate your life further but every time I see you all I want to do is kiss you"

Silent Brooke continued to stare up at him, Julian stepped closer and slowly giving her warning closed the gap between them and did the very thing he always wanted to do. He kissed her.

-x-

Walking side by side Lucas looked down to the top of Noah's head, being truly alone and out with Noah for the first time had Lucas originally nervous though Lucas was surprised how easy it he was communicating with Noah.

His expectations lowered Lucas had relaxed, his experience with Noah with might still be considered brief had given Lucas an understanding that made it easier to deal with Noah's sometimes aloof manner. It had been hard at first for Lucas to think of Noah differently than the other children he knew, Noah was not playful in the way the other kids were and it helped Lucas remembering that. Despite the difference Lucas had still decided to bring Noah to the Rivercourt, not for a game of basketball but because it was a place with such significance to Lucas he wanted Noah to be a part of that.

Together they walked along the banks of the river, ignoring how overdressed Noah was, shoes already wet and dirty Noah kept his attention on their surroundings, his shoulders hunched as he searched.

Suddenly a burst of energy had Noah's body go on full alert, his stiff body moved fast as he pointed and said in a loud whisper, "there!"

"What is it?" Lucas asked.

"Hmmm… maybe a River Cooter or a Yellow Bellyslider" Noah's lips pursed in concentration as he watched the turtle.

Lucas quickly handed his camera over and Noah snapped a few more pictures, "we could look it up on my phone?"

Noah handed the camera back as the turtle swam out of sight and the boy continued his search, he shook his head as he kept walking, "I will research tonight".

At the thought of Noah giving himself homework Lucas gave a chuckle and decided that a trip to the zoo would be a future outing with Noah.

They walked for another half hour before Lucas got Noah back in his truck and went to a quiet mall outside of town, he chose it so Noah wouldn't feel ambushed by running into anyone Lucas or Brooke knew but secretly couldn't wait to proudly go around with his son.

Lucas got Noah to take his shoes off and they walked inside with the boy's feet bare, inside he went straight to the shoe store and told Noah to pick a new pair, Noah was on the taller side for his age and his feet were long and skinny, eventually with Lucas' help they settled on a pair of orange converse shoes and Lucas grabbed a pair of socks for him and flip flops.

At the next store Lucas took Noah to the swimming pool section, "let's get some things for tomorrow" they both grabbed a couple pool toys each and then Lucas eyed the water pistols, his brow lifted in thought, "you ever used one of these?" he was still looking at the water pistols as he asked Noah.

"No"

"We are getting some of these" he grabbed two packs of two and added them to the trolley, Lucas had a childish glee in his eyes as Noah looked up at his father strangely.

Lucas wondered how Brooke would feel about him taking Noah shopping, a pastime he had no doubt Brooke would love to do with their son, and as he thought about Brooke his mind started imagining that she was there with them. The vision of Brooke walking by his side, dark eyes twinkling with secrets and open joy, was so real that Lucas could almost feel her, her lips were moving though there was no sound yet Lucas some how knew her words were playful.

The daydream didn't last and she faded as they continued to walk, as the vision of Brooke vanished Lucas realised that the Brooke he had seen was the teenage Brooke, long dark hair, a younger fuller face, a bounce in her step that didn't seem to come so easily anymore. He ached for that Brooke, for the Brooke he had failed and hurt, for the girl who would never walk by his side again with such effortless, infectious cheer.

-x-

Brooked entered the diner a little shaky and flushed, she spotted Karen and quickly joined the older woman, they hugged again before sitting across from each other.

"How are you? How is Lily- is Lilypad here?"

"Andy and Lily will be joining me here next week and we are all doing well, we are settling down in New Zealand now that Lily will be going to school there"

"That is so exciting though I'm sure I speak for everyone when I say you are missed here" a tinge of sadness crossed Brooke's face and she covered Karen's hand.

For a second Karen looked down and then her eyes went to the window before she smiled sadly at Brooke, "there are so many memories here, most of them are good but even they remind me of what I lost. There came I time when I had to look away from what could have been, I miss you all too but I am happy, happier than I thought I could be after…" the words got stuck in Karen's throat however Brooke knew what she was saying. They both were thinking of the same man in those silent moments, Karen blinked and returned to the present, "anyway, let's talk about you. How are you really?"

"I feel whole for the first time in six years" Brooke confessed, "I never dreamt that I would be able to be Noah's _real_ Mom, I am just happy to be a part of his life and I have Sam too. I am home, I have my family, my friends and my work… what more could I ask for" she was being honest, Brooke felt like her life was going in all the right directions.

"Love?" Karen asked.

With a smile Brooke answered, "I am surrounded by love. I was scared with the truth coming out that I would lose the people I care the most about but here I am… more loved than ever" and when Karen gave Brooke a searching love Brooke shrugged her shoulders, "I know that's not what you meant but I don't need to be _in_ love to be happy and I am happy"

"Then I am happy for you" without skipping a beat Karen added "and Julian seems nice"

Laughing Brooke shook her head, "not you too. Julian had been a great friend" and even as she said it Brooke blushed remembering what exactly she had been doing with Julian before meeting with Karen, "Julian is a great guy but I am not ready to fall in love" and a part of Brooke recognised how easily Julian could be to fall in love with.

Karen sent Brooke a warm look but there was something else there, something dark and knowing, and this time Karen covered Brooke's hand giving her a little squeeze that said more than any words could between the two of them. Things better left unspoken for now.

It was close enough to the surface that as Karen slipped her hand away she asked quietly "how are you coping with Lucas?"

"Better than I thought. We are doing the best we can"

"Like all good parents" Karen commended, "I don't blame you for the decisions you made back then. I know better than most what you were going through"

"How did you do it, all those years?" and they both knew what Brooke was really asking as they skated closely to what they were both not saying,

With another sad smile Karen answered, "I had Keith and Dan didn't really matter, I wish I had realised it sooner"

"I wish…" Brooke looked away and shook her head, "never mind. Perhaps it was always meant to be this way, Noah coming into our lives now instead of in high school. Things are going to work out, I feel it"

"I think you're right" and once again Karen was amazed at the woman Brooke had become, how warm and kind a girl could be coming from the lonely and cold childhood Brooke had raised herself in.

-x-

The next day Brooke was humming as she cleaned up the house, Sam was busy making more mess at the dining table though Brooke didn't mind because it was a school project and Noah sat next to his foster sister and was in his element working with her.

"This little brother thing is really growing on me" Sam was smug as Noah corrected her work.

Brooke pointed a finger at the teenager, "he is not doing your homework for you"

"Of _course,_ not" Sam scoffed, "he can be my little study buddy though, right kid?"

"Sure" Noah nodded, "you could use the help" and the side of his mouth twitched.

Shocked Sam's mouth dropped open, "was that a joke?"

Brooke wanted to laugh but she tried to look serious, "do not turn him into a mini Sam!"

Flicking her long dark hair behind her Sam smiled, "you would be so lucky".

Turning away from them Brooke finished wiping the kitchen counter down and then went to pack her own bag already having made sure Sam and Noah had theirs ready. Brooke was pleasantly surprised when she came back out to find the dining table cleared and both the kids standing near the door ready to go.

Brooke mouthed _thank you_ to Sam and together they all left.

When they arrived at Nathan and Haley's house it was Nathan who opened the door, he had already met Noah and ushered the group in. Lucas entered the entry way with Karen not far behind him, "hi, you're here!" he went to kiss Brooke's cheek but she quickly moved aside, it ended in a brief but awkward hug, Lucas quickly moved to say hi to Sam as Brooke went to greet Karen.

Lastly Lucas bent down to say hi to Noah, with a smile Lucas held out his hand and Noah took it, two pups of a handshake and the two of the slapped the backs of their hands together before a quick fist bump. They had created their easy personalised handshake the day before and it was a way for Lucas to have that contact he craved with Noah without pushing the boy too far.

"Morning, Noah. I'm so happy you get to meet my family today, you've already met my little brother Nathan but there's someone else special I would like you to meet. This is my Mom" Lucas stood and reached for his mother who happily crouched down to smile at Noah.

"Hello, you must be Noah. I have been hearing so much about you. I'm Karen, Luke's Mom" she was already holding out her hand and Noah reached for it, the boy was starting to get use to all the touching and was grateful to watch everyone hug each other without being part of that so he was thankful to shake Karen's hand.

"You live in New Zealand"

"Yes, I do, but I think I will be visiting Tree Hill a lot more now"

"Have you seen a volcano?"

Karen nodded, "I have even climbed one" and smiled as she saw how the boys eyes lit up even if the rest of his face remained still, it brought back so many memories because Karen could see so much of Lucas in his son but looking at his eyes Karen saw Brooke, despite the lighter colour Noah had Brooke's eyes. Stopping herself from holding his face Karen stood up though she kept her attention on Noah, "I suppose I must share you with everyone else now"

The group went outside where Haley met Noah where her skill as a teacher showed in the easy rapport she made with Noah and they quickly started talking about music causing Nathan, Lucas and Brooke to all roll their eyes. Lucas was wearing his board shorts and singlet, already barefoot he looked ready to jump in the pool but instead went upstairs to fetch Jamie.

Lucas came back with his nephew hanging over his back, the two of them laughing, Jamie begged to be put down and instantly ran to Sam and Brooke who stood nearby.

"Aunt Brooke!" he crashed into her legs and Brooke instinctively lifted her nephew up and rested him on her hip, from his perch Jamie high fived Sam, "what's up?" he tried to act cool but his cheeks flushed rose as Sam smiled back at him. Lucas joined them and Jamie climbed down from Brooke, lifting Lucas' arm up he sounded impatient "hey, where's my cousin?" he placed a finger on his chin in thought and looked up at his Aunt and Uncle, "I'm starting to think he isn't real" his voice was cheeky.

Confused Brooke looked around, she began to frown "where is…?" however she noticed Haley was nowhere insight either, "looks like Haley stole our son" Brooke finished, she turned her face towards Lucas but her eyes were looking towards the house.

Lucas smiled at the easy way Brooke said those words and how natural it already felt to hear them, "lets go steal him back" and with Jamie handing of his arm the three of them headed inside, Nathan and Karen followed.

They found Haley singing at the piano as Noah played and though the adults all stopped to listen Jamie rushed forward without qualms, his loud voice interrupting his mother and newly found cousin, "HI!" his grin was huge as he stopped right next to Noah and rested his arm over the piano in front of his cousin, "I'm James Lucas Scott" the confident and rambunctious Jamie had the watching adults chuckling.

Politely resting his hands on his knees, a much more subdued Noah answered with a nod, not blinking he introduced himself in kind "hello, I am Noah August Davis" and he held out his hands.

Jamie grabbed Noah's hand and pulled him off the bench, "come on, I'll show you my room" and he ran off pulling Noah along behind him.

Seeing the startled look in Noah's eyes Brooke quickly went back outside and asked Sam to go play with the boys upstairs.

-x-

Karen and Haley were floating on their inflatables seats in the pool a drink in their hand as they caught up, Sam and Jamie were chasing each other with water pistols, Brooke sat with Noah slathering sunscreen on the boy, while Nathan and Lucas stood with a beer each.

Blindly nodding Lucas was suddenly slapped on the back of his head, Nathan sent his brother an angry look, "Luke, what the hell are you doing!"

"What?" Lucas was confused, his eyes strayed from Nathan back to the scene behind his brother, and Nathan smack Lucas again.

Stepping to the side to block Lucas' view Nathan gave Lucas a pointed look, "that!" he lowered his voice, "I'm not blind and if you're not careful I won't be the only one to notice you ogling Brooke"

Lucas laughed, "I am not og-"

"Cut the crap with me, you haven't been listening to a word I have been saying and your eyes have been following Brooke – or should I say her bikini – and every move she makes" Nathan forced Lucas to walk away with him, taking his brother to the gazebo Nathan made sure they were out of sight and hearing, "you made your choice Luke, do I need to remind you of Peyton, your pregnant fiancée waiting at home for you"

"Of course not" his tone adamant.

Nathan practically spat at Lucas, "then get your head in the game. I get it, you and Brooke, you've never been good at the just friend's thing which would be fine if the Noah situation hadn't forced you two to be together more than you're comfortable with but you have to get used to it and learn to control the eyesex"

He raised his brow, "eyesex?"

"Yeah, eyesex, it's what Haley and I call the look you and Brooke share"

"You named it?" Lucas almost choked and Nathan shrugged.

"Yeah" he shook his head, "but that's not the point. You're getting married and there is a lot of people who could get hurt here, we aren't in high school anymore"

Getting defensive Lucas straightened up, "I don't know what you think is going on-"

"Lindsey was too busy looking in Peyton's direction to even notice it but Peyton isn't Lindsey and if you two are going to be around each other more instead of less you have to rein it in"

With a sigh Lucas let his shoulders drop, "I'm trying"

"I know you are, I know. When you and Peyton got engaged I saw how you and Brooke cut it back again and then Noah entered the picture and you were thrown back together. I get it, there's history, that-" Nathan seemed uncomfortable even saying it "-sexual chemistry or whatever, but you have got to try harder or I'm not going to be the only one saying something"

"Message received" Lucas walked off and when he returned to the poolside Sam and Brooke were in the middle of a loud discussion, conscious of what Nathan had just said Lucas walked by them and went straight into the pool to join the others.

Brooke waved her hands at Sam, "what do you call that?"

"A swim suit" Sam dropped her towel down and smiled.

"If that's what you call two scraps of material" Brooke frowned, "put your singlet back on"

"Ah no"

"Um yes, you're fifteen"

"And you're like fifty but I don't tell you what to wear"

"Excuse me, I am twenty-four and what I am wearing is fine"

Jamie was leaning against the edge of the pool watching Sam and Brooke argue, he had a silly look on his face as his eyes went between them, in the break between their argument Jamie spoke up "I think you both look very pretty just the way you are"

At the same time Brooke and Sam turned to look at Jamie, they both crossed their arms, finally Brooke gave in "fine!" and as Sam laughed Brooke went and slipped her singlet back on and then threw Sam hers, Brooke muttering under her breath about Scott boys being perves.

-x-

As the afternoon came to an end and the breeze came in they all moved inside, Brooke helped Haley clean up outside after the others left. From the corner of her eye Haley watched Brooke, "what's new Tigger?"

"You mean other than the secret son?" Brooke joked.

Haley laughed, "yes but you seem skittish today, more so than usual lately, did something happen?"

"A lot is happening lately"

"Nathan told me about running into you and Lucas the other day…"

Brooke sighed, "not everything is about Luke" she looked around before facing Haley, "If you must know, Julian asked me out"

"Brooke" Haley squealed, "when?"

"Yesterday" and she added in a hiss, "and he kissed me"

"This is great" Haley was relieved but Brooke looked unsure and nervous.

They carried the rubbish to the bin, "do you really think so?"

"Don't you?"

"Well it's not a good time to start something new" Brooke was hesitant, the two women stopped before going inside to join everyone else, "with everything that is happening"

"This might be just what is needed, you deserve to have someone special in your life Brooke" even as she said it Haley couldn't help but think Brooke being in a relationship was just what was needed to help defuse the current situation.

Brooke smiled, "I really like him, Hales, he is one of the good guys"

"Then there's nothing stopping you, let yourself be happy and give Julian a chance" and they shared a sisterly hug before joining everyone inside.

Soon Brooke sat at the piano with Noah by her side, Haley and Nathan resting against each other while Lucas and Karen sat on the couch. Sam watched Jamie run out of the room while everyone else's attention was on Brooke and Noah playing the piano.

Following the younger boy Sam found Jamie sitting on his bed kicking the floor, his face in his hands, "what's wrong J-Man?" Sam plopped down next to Jamie, "you're looking kind of glum there"

Jamie sighed, "it feels funny. I was always her favourite boy"

Sam nudged Jamie's shoulder with her own, "I guess we both have to learn to share her, huh"

With a sigh Jamie fell back, "I guess, I mean Aunt Brooke is his Mom" he paused, narrowing his eyes he let out a long breath "man, I gotta pay more attention to my Mom during piano lessons"

"Getting jealous?" Sam laughed, "you will always be your Mom's favourite" and she hugged Jamie, after Jamie thanked her Sam started to tickle the boy and added on "until she has another baby"

Laughing as Sam tickled him Jamie couldn't keep the frown on his face, "S _aaaaam_ " he complained and once free he ran back down stairs and jumped onto his own mother's lap, Haley smoothed Jamie's hair and gave him a kiss on the top of his head, smelling his scent as she rested her cheek against his soft dark blonde hair.

 **-x-**

 **Sigh, it's done, had to rein it in a bit and lol I didn't beta around the bush with Nathan this chapter but I am happy it sort of turned out the way I planned. Now I a going to go take some pain killers to knock me out so I can hopefully have a decent sleep before tomorrow. Night guys, or I guess good day to those where the sun is still shining.**

 **-mickei**


	13. Chapter 13

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, and I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting. I do own a pair of brown children's boots that are my fave to wear that were an absolute bargain.**

 **Thank you to everyone who read, favourited and followed, and to the reviewers who always bring me back. A big thanks to bjq, always, lileen, brookelucas, brucas, callison, dianehermans and the guests reviewers. I would also like to thank everyone for the well wishes and hoping I get well soon, I have a condition that sometimes hits me and makes me very unwell. Right now I am feeling good and hope to do as much writing in the next week that I can.**

 **I am glad people are liking the bonding, this chapter has a slight time jump from the last and that will happen more often between chapters now.**

Chapter Thirteen

A small bump curved Peyton's usually flat stomach, if you didn't know the skinny blonde you wouldn't think twice about it but for Peyton she finally felt like her perfect little bump looked like she was pregnant instead of just carrying extra weight than normal. Hand over her bump Peyton ran her fingers over her skin, a smile gracing her face, and then she finished getting dressed covering her pregnancy with a long loose green shirt, over her black tights that were more comfortable for her growing body. Next Peyton slipped on her boots and then went looking for Lucas, she found him in the nursery, it was still a coat of paint away from a finished paint job, Lucas had gotten distracted and never finished it but he stood now looking the room, hands on his hips, "Luke" Peyton interrupted his thoughts, "it's time to go".

They didn't know who was more nervous, Lucas and Brooke had held off Noah meeting Peyton but it was Noah's fourth weekend in Tree Hill and though a part of Peyton had been happy to pretend Noah was not part of her life it was starting to be obvious that the two were being kept apart. Noah had met all their other friends and had settled into life in Tree Hill, Lucas' routine with his son was going well but it also meant that Peyton's time with her fiancé had been limited over the last month. Between Noah and the movie Peyton felt like she barely saw Lucas and if she became part of his time with Noah it meant she had that extra time with him, besides she rationalised that as Noah's stepmother she should try to be a parental figure in his life.

The DNA results had come in and to no one's surprise except Peyton's it confirmed Noah's paternity and corrected the birth certificate to include Lucas as well. Peyton was well aware that Lucas was not comfortable with Noah's surname and was planning on approaching Brooke about changing it to Scott, the fact he was now opening up to her more about Noah made Peyton more content, she was getting used to the idea, she had to after the DNA results dashed her hopes that it was all a mistake.

Despite her change of attitude Peyton's nerves were still standing to attention, even pregnant Peyton was not a kid person, she had never particularly paid attention to Jamie and found she could only handle so much time with the child. Peyton avoided children though she hoped to build some sort of relationship with Lucas' son, he would never be her child like the one in her womb yet Peyton had loved and cared for baby Jenny all those years ago, she had loved Jenny like her own and hoped that over time she could perhaps love Noah too despite his age and gender.

Lucas seemed to brim with energy as they left the house, half excitement at the thought it could go right and half dread that it could go wrong.

From the car Peyton watched as Brooke opened her door, Noah in front of her, and she could see Brooke fling her head back and laugh as something was said. From the distance Peyton saw Lucas and Noh share their handshake and then as they stepped away Brooke's fingers brushed over the boy's hair and the same hand lifted up into the air in a wave goodbye that Noah and Lucas returned.

Turning to face the car they looked down, Lucas' large smile dimpling his cheek as he spoke to his son. Brooke watched for a moment and Peyton stared up at the other woman, their eyes met and slowly Brooke's smile fell until her expression turned hard as Peyton continued to glare.

Then Brooke's head gave a slight move to the side, her eyes closed and when she looked at Peyton again she gave a small smile and turned away closing the door between them.

Lucas and Noah reached the car and Peyton quickly got out, wiping the stray tear that fell as she went so when she faced them her face did not betray her as she tried to seem as happy and relaxed as she could. Voice only slightly shaky Peyton smiled at Noah, "hey" and then she looked at Lucas. _I can do this._

-x-

Blindfolded Brooke was careful with each step she took as Julian guided her way, "where are you taking me?"

The only answer was his laughter. Their snatched moments hadn't been enough for Julian and today they had the whole day together just the two of them and finally Julian was going to give Brooke the date he owed her. When they reached their destination Julian removed his hands, "voilà!"

Standing at the end of a jetty Brooke was hit by the sight of a waiting sail boat framed by a clear blue sky, Brooke kinked her brow "nice Catamaran, you know how to sail?" she asked and Julian helped her aboard.

With a shrug he sent her a carefree grin, "it's like riding a bike"

"I haven't been sailing in years" she ran her hands along the boat remembering the good times she had on her parents sail boat when she was a teenager, "the last time was the summer after graduation" _with Peyton_.

Brooke let the memories roll off her and helped Julian as they set sail, with the wind in her hair she gave herself into the moment and taking the reins she directed Julian off the coast of her favourite cove where they moored the boat and stretched out in the sun as the waves gently swayed them.

"Care for a dip?" Julian suggested and Brooke quickly stood to lift her dress up over her head, for a second Julian was gobsmacked, his mouth ajar at the thought of skinny dipping with Brooke but she threw her dress to the ground beside her sunglasses and wearing a modest dark blue underwear set jumped straight into the water.

The splash hit Julian and had him laughing and he shook his head as she reappeared above the water, swiping the wet hair out of her face she sent him a daring look. As quick as he could Julian shackled off his clothes and in only his briefs jumped up and tucked his knees in as he landed in the water to join her.

As soon as he broke the waves Julian felt the splash from Brooke's direction, they played in the water until Brooke pulled herself back on board and laid in the sun again this time to dry herself, Julian soon joined her and the conversation came easily. They didn't talk about the movie or past relationships, they didn't even discuss Brooke's children.

Isolated surrounded by water overlooking the empty shore Brooke could almost pretend the rest of the world didn't exist, this was a moment in time free of worries and overthinking. Julian had packed a decadent picnic and they shared it, Brooke flirted and gave Julian a match for innuendo though he wasn't as subtle as the afternoon crept by. Another time Brooke might have given into temptation and opportunity however Brooke held back, she knew that the world around them still existed and wasn't ready for more than she was willing to give.

Julian was fun, he was easy, and that was exactly what Brooke wanted.

-x-

The idea of the drive-in had seemed perfect to Lucas, they had stocked up at the grocery store for snacks before heading to the drive-in for the movie. They could all spend the time together but ease into it with no pressure for conversation or too much contact, the three of them had fit perfectly in the back of Luke's pick-up truck, Peyton and Lucas rested against each other with their back to the cab while Noah lay on the other side of Lucas with his feet towards them. At first Lucas thought the movie was perfect for Noah, a kid's movie that wasn't childish, though he hadn't thought about the subject and how Noah might feel about the familial bonds in the movie.

As the movie played out Lucas felt uncomfortable with his choice even though Noah did not seem phased, when it was over Lucas took Peyton and Noah out for lunch choosing to sit along the Riverwalk close to the live band knowing that music was something all three of them enjoyed.

Peyton was slightly stiff and didn't seem to know whether to treat Noah like a child or an adult but despite that Lucas was happy with the effort his fiancée was showing and knew that if Peyton could relax and not overthink it then this might all just work.

The hours showed Lucas how this could work, it might not feel natural now but he was sure that with time that would change. After they ate Lucas and Peyton took Noah to the arcade where they joined in on the fun which put Noah at ease as he too played the games. They walked out with a handful of prizes and the adults smiling, Noah had relaxed and though his smile was not on show Lucas had learnt to read Noah and was confident his son had enjoyed himself.

It was five in the afternoon when Lucas dropped Peyton off at home before taking Noah back to Brooke's house. The day at an end Lucas let go of a deep breath, they had all survived the day and even Brooke seemed relieved when she opened the door fresh faced, her damp hair curling around her face, barefoot in a baggy sweatshirt that barely covered her short shorts, "hi" she smiled with a question in her eyes, Lucas gave Brooke a nod and her eyes cleared, "welcome home" she moved aside to let Noah in and watched as father and son said goodbye.

"I'll see you Tuesday" Lucas gave her a wave goodbye and she shut the door before he had even taken two steps.

They kept things focused on Noah, Lucas and Brooke barely spoke outside the brief changeovers and when at the same events for family and friends they made sure they kept apart yet acted cordial enough that it wasn't obvious that they were avoiding each other. The tension between them was at a stalemate, a workable stalemate.

-x-

The next day Brooke guided Noah into Tric which by day was the acting headquarters to the 'Ravens' movie, the boy still wore his school uniform, the charcoal shorts and pale blue shirt with the dark royal blue tie. Brooke's hand rested lightly on Noah's shoulder as they stopped, familiar with the layout Brooke went straight to where Julian had told her to meet him and knocked.

Lucas opened the door and his eyes widened in surprise, "Brooke, Noah, what a nice surprise" and with a smile Lucas stepped back and Noah stepped forward towards his father. Noah happily shared his personal handshake with his father and as they parted Lucas noticed Brooke looking behind him.

"I'm actually meant to meet Julian here"

"We just finished a table reading and he stepped out for a minute, come in"

Brooke was hesitant, she followed them further into the back room, "I thought I would bring Noah too… maybe you could show him around, Sam's out back if you would prefer her to watch him"

"What are you doing here, Brooke?"

"My job" it came out curter than she meant it, her words stopped anything Lucas might have said, and she watched as he nodded and turned his attention to Noah. Seconds later Julian walked in and explained how the room was going to be used by Brooke as she took the casts measurements, Lucas left taking Noah with him and as son as they were alone Julian placed a kiss against Brooke's lips.

It was brief, Brooke kissed Julian back and then pulled away getting straight to business. One after the other the main movie cast walked in, it was surreal for Brooke to see these copies of her friends. The last one was the young woman playing Brooke who Julian came in to introduce, before the girl walked in Brooke was excited but it only lasted a few minutes before the girl's attentions became too much for Brooke, a few minutes later the questions were starting to annoy the designer.

Two catty warnings seemed to go straight over young Missy's head, after taking Missy's measurements Brooke had told her to try on the cheerleading outfit Brooke had designed and now with a pin in her mouth Brooke tried to not stab the actress.

Finally, Brooke snapped "for your info, I did a lot more in high school than have sex, okay? I was student body president, I was the captain of the cheerleading squad, I started a clothing line and I even had a b… It's amazing I even had time for sex!" with one last pin Brooke stepped away, her face red.

For the first time Missy was silent and then she apologised, "Sorry. I didn't mean to offend you, I've been wanting to meet you for weeks and I've totally screwed this up. I was just following the breakdown they gave me"

"What breakdown?" Brooke asked and Missy handed Brooke a worn piece of paper, she took it and read the typed words _._

 _Brooke Davis: Gorgeous brunette with an amazing energy and smile. Her three favourite things: Sex, sex and sex._

"You're done" Brooke practically yelled at Missy as she abandoned the actress and paper in hand stormed out. Everywhere she looked Brooke couldn't find the face she was looking for, she searched outside and found Lucas laughing with Sam and Noah.

Grabbing Lucas by the collar Brooke dragged him away with an abrupt "excuse me", she pulled him away from the children and around the corner pushed her ex against the wall, "You! Hoe could you write such horrible things about me?" she was so angry and Lucas stared at her in shock and confusion, _"you_ , who called me your pretty girl and said I was gonna change the world someday. Is that all you think of me? _The mother of your son_ " she pushed against his chest as he went to stand straight.

Lucas fell back against the wall again, "what are you talking about?"

"This" Brooke shoved the breakdown at him, "tell me you didn't write that!"

Reading it Lucas' expression softened, he looked her in the eyes "I didn't write this"

Brooke didn't believe Lucas, "then who did?" she took the breakdown back but Lucas took it from her hands and ripped it in too.

Still reeling from Brooke's outburst Lucas quietly answered, "Julian" and didn't get a chance to add anymore for Brooke stormed away as quickly as she appeared.

A part of Brooke was devastated, another not surprised, but it was the fiery anger inside Brooke that drove her forward and when she saw Julian grinning at her she strutted forward wishing she had something to throw at him. Brooke settled for poking a finger at his chest, "you think all I care about is sex, I should have seen this coming. You related to my character in the book, all the comments you made yesterday as if I was a sure thing. I've got news for you, I am not that girl anymore and I have always been more than just sex."

The words out Brooke turned around and walked off ignoring Julian calling her name, she flung her hand up as she left, "high school Brooke graduated!".

Even in heels Brooke was surprisingly fast, she met the kids outside again and farewelled Lucas without looking him in the eye.

As they drove home Sam eyed Brooke, "you okay?"

"I'm fine, just fine"

"Riggghtio" Sam drawled and looked away from Brooke.

When they were home Brooke instructed Noah and Sam to go do their homework and like most school days the two of them made themselves comfortable next to each other at the kitchen table as they worked, on autopilot Brooke placed a drink and snack on the table for them before going to her own room to calm down.

Her phone had multiple missed calls, it rang again in Brooke's hand and she answered it to end the call a second later. The next one was a voice message and unable to help herself Brooke listened to Julian's voice.

" _I don't want high school Brooke, I was an awkward mathlete in school, that kid would never have a chance with Brooke Davis or anyone in the popular group. I'm sorry the breakdown hurt your feelings, it was meant to describe my favourite character before anyone got to know the real person, the real Brooke. The girl who has been nearly impossible to find but worth every second of the wait. The girl, no woman, who is funny, intelligent, kind-hearted, string-headed, simple, complicated, motherly, childish, tough, sensitive, beautiful and way cooler than she was in high school. I want to show that Brooke to the world"_

The message ended and Brooke continued to hold the phone against her ear, her thoughts were broken by a knock on the front door. Expecting Julian, she quickly exited her room and told the kids to stay where they were, at the door Brooke waited a moment as she wondered if she really wanted to open the door.

Julian's words echoed in her mind, they called to her yet something about what he said didn't fit, had Brooke question if Julian who seemed to read her so well knew her at all because she wasn't a different person to who she was in high school.

The knock came again and Brooke took a breath before opening the door.

The light eyes met hers and Brooke froze for a split second and then she slammed the door straight in their face.

 **-x-**

 **Thanks for reading. Please review and follow. Who do you think is on the other side of the door?**

 **-mickei**


	14. Chapter 14

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, and I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting. I do own a little Jon Snow figurine though.**

 **A big thanks to the reviewers who helped me get this chapter out so soon, you guys are awesome and made writing this a lot easier. So thanks to k-pixy, pennelope, Noah, Lovewins, lovebrucas, LucasBrooke, Brucasforever, Lileen, Callison, Brucas, diane, Princesakarlita411 and all the anonymous guests reviews. Here is the new chapter, cliffhanger answered.**

Chapter Fourteen

It had been four days since Brooke slammed the door in Victoria's face and Brooke was all too aware that her mother had not left Tree Hill. Victoria had contacted Brooke multiple times each day and Brooke had left the door closed the next time she came knocking.

On the way to leave to pick up Noah from school Brooke saw Victoria waiting outside the store and locking her jaw Brooke quickened her steps to her car and the means to her escape. Victoria moved surprisingly quick in her heels and blocked her daughter's hand from unlocking the car, "you could at least show me some respect-"

"Respect?" Brooke interrupted with a mocking laugh, "that's earnt, Victoria, I believe we said everything that needed to be said the last time we spoke" and Brooke tried to push her mother aside.

Exasperated Victoria clicked her tongue, "I am not going to leave until you agree to talk to me, like it or not we have things we must discuss"

Brooke wanted nothing more than to tell Vitoria to go to hell however her mother's unusual insistence had Brooke cautious about how long the older woman was willing to stay in town, and with each day Victoria was in Tree Hill it grew more likely she would confront Brooke while Noah was present.

Giving in Brooke sent her mother a steely look, "fine, I will meet you at Rosario's at 6, you get ten minutes which is more time than you've ever given me"

"Don't be childish, Brooke, you were not some depraved child like you insist on portraying yourself as"

Ignoring the barb Brooke got in her car and drove off, she knew her mother would never understand that the only things she had ever offered her daughters were the only things that didn't have true value.

The meeting with her mother had Brooke distracted as she picked up Noah and took him home, it was Friday so Sam had gone out after school and Brooke sat with Noah as he did his homework and then together they started making dinner. The knock came just after Brooke had placed dinner in the oven and she smoothed her hands against her thighs as she opened the door, "hi, Luke. Thanks for this"

"Anytime" Lucas walked in and went straight over to Noah, they said hello and Lucas asked about school while Brooke got ready to leave.

"Right. Sam probably won't be home until late tonight and I should be back by then but if she comes home early I'm happy if you want to go home. Dinner is in the oven, I have set the timer, Noah showers himself and bed time is eight on Friday's with lights out at nine no later" she sent Noah a warning look and then seemed lost as there was nothing else to say.

Lucas smiled, "I've got this" and then to his surprise Lucas watched as Brooke gave the top of Noah's head a quick kiss, "bye" she told her son and left. It was the first time Lucas had seen Brooke kiss Noah and though it was brief and just against his hair Lucas knew the casual way Noah reacted spoke volumes on how Noah was coping in Brooke's care.

Once alone Lucas rubbed his hands together, "what would you like to do?"

Noah looked into Lucas' eyes as he answered, "I'm just going to go play in my room" and he abandoned Lucas who looked around Brooke's living room suddenly bored.

"Right I will just… watch some tv I guess".

-x-

Ten minutes late Brooke sat down across from her mother uncaring how the other woman felt about her arrival, both brunettes looked unimpressed and their expressions were uncannily similar.

The silence was deafening, a waiter poured water for them both and when they sent him away Brooke kinked her brow at her mother, "I thought I gave you everything you wanted in New York"

"Don't presume to know what I want. I expected an apology, you know" she had an unwavering dignity that astounded Brooke, Victoria took a sip as Brooke's mouth fell open.

Voice hoarse Brooke was perplexed, "for what?"

"You accused me of vile things. After the truth came out I waited for you to contact me and say sorry instead you call with more insults. I would never lay a hand on you or allow another to do so, for you to think so lowly of me-"

"Like it's a huge leap to make" Brooke scoffed.

"I never wanted the company without you, you are the company Brooke. All I ever wanted for you is for you to aim higher, be better, instead of settling for…" she gave a sneer "this"

"I am finally happy with my life"

"Because you have the boy back"

"That _boy_ is my son, he has a name and it's Noah" Brooke hissed.

"Perhaps it was wrong of me to hide the truth of what happened back then but let me remind you Brooke you signed the papers, you chose to give him away"

" _To a family_ because I wanted my son to have something Daddy and you never gave me, something your cold heart can never understand. You left my son alone, you left me alone to cry for him" though her voice was low it was fierce.

Victoria leaned forward, "and look at everything you have achieved! You were seventeen and a child yourself Brooke, far too young and immature to raise a baby. Your whole life would have been derailed if you became a mother; your talent wasted, your success gone"

Brooke had never met someone so pessimistic about life as her mother, Victoria seemed incapable to view the world through emotions, "what makes you think I couldn't have still done it? Perhaps if I got given support not criticism with every decision I made, all you ever do is doubt me and tell me I can't do something"

"That is not true, I was by your side and helped you build your brand because I believe in you"

"You believed you could use me. _I_ created my company here in Tree Hill with the people you constantly look down on and I can do it again" Brooke's tone was held back anger while Victoria spoke with exasperation, hazel eyes meeting blue. Brooke shook her head, "why are you even here?"

"You're my daughter. When I read about what had happened I was worried and when you never contacted me… and then this mess with the child-"

" _Noah_ " Brooke insisted.

"Yes, I know" Victoria looked Brooke straight in the eye, "despite what you think I am not heartless, Brooke. I kept an eye on him and made sure he was always safe, and when it became clear he was an exceptional boy and needed more I made sure he was given a place in one of the best private schools in the state and that money was no issue"

"And what you expect me to be grateful?" Brooke laughed, she touched her brow with two fingers, "you still don't get it. Money, possessions, fancy schools… it's nothing without love"

Victoria rolled her eyes, "always _what about love_? Love does not last. Love did not get you where you are, what good did love do for you with that boy who left you for that girl you insist on calling your friend and giving a free ride too despite the fact she would stab you in the back the first chance she got to get what she wants and has. Love is for fairy tales for little children"

"That's the difference between us, Victoria, I _love_ my son" Brooke stood, she was determined not to cry, ready to leave Victoria stilled Brooke by gently grabbing her daughter's slim wrist.

"I know I don't say it but I do love you, of course I do"

"You have a funny way of showing it"

"I don't do sentimental. I am hard on you because I do care" though there was a shine in Victoria's eyes her tone and demeanour were the same as always. Brooke could have left but something in her mother's face stopped her, in this moment Brooke was reminded of Noah and how he struggled with understanding and showing emotions. Brooke saw something of her son in her mother and it had her taking her seat again.

"I understand why you left but now you know the truth that I had no involvement in what happened to you I hope you can see the sense to return to what is yours, not for me, but for yourself and for all the employees that depend on the company." Victoria paused, "Perhaps I was reminisce in not offering my support in a different way when you were pregnant and gave birth to Noah-"

Brooke went cold, those months came flashing back to her, her jaw locked as he cut in "Do you remember what you said when I was pregnant?" when Victoria's mouth closed and she looked blankly at Brooke she answered her own question changing her voice to sound more like her mother, "I knew you were a stupid girl but not this stupid, you should have gotten rid of it as soon as you found out now you're throwing away what little hope you already had of a future, good move Brooke, this will probably ruin the one good thing you had - that pretty little body you like to share with all the boys. God, do you even know who the father is? Don't think your father and I will clean up your mess, I never wanted children and I certainly don't want to be raising yours" she could remember word by word what her mother had said as if it was only yesterday.

"Yes well" Victoria swallowed, "I admit I have not always been the best mother but you have my support now if you want it, perhaps I can try to be better than I was. I meant everything I said in the letter I sent to your lawyer"

"What letter?" Brooke had no idea what her mother was talking about but she doubted it would make any difference, "It doesn't matter, anything you have to say is twenty-three years too late" this time when Brooke stood she followed through and left her mother alone.

Instead of going home Brooke found herself at the beach looking out at the ocean wondering why apart of her still after everything just wanted her mother's acceptance.

-x-

Not even twenty minutes after Brooke left Lucas was surprised when the door opened and Sam came into the house. The teenager was even more surprised, she looked around the room as if expecting someone else to appear, "uh, hi" Sam dropped her school bag on the table, "where's Brooke and the kid?"

"Brooke had something to do so I am just watching Noah until she comes home, I was just about to serve dinner so I hope you're hungry"

"Sure" Sam looked anything but sure, she ran a hand through her long dark hair, "where's Noah?"

"In his room" Lucas answered and Sam disappeared to find her foster brother.

Lucas waited five minutes before going to find them, "hey guys do you want to wash your hands and come help set the table" Sam was sprawled out on the floor with Noah, they were surrounded by Lego though the teenager seemed to be just relaxing watching Noah build. Both of them stood straight away and Lucas was pleased with how they quickly appeared in the kitchen, Sam grabbed the plates while Noah took charge of the cutlery and then Sam organised a glass of water for both her and Noah. Before Lucas knew it, they were all sitting down eating, "Haley tells me you're a very talented writer" Lucas said to Sam.

"I don't have much competition at Tree Hill"

"Don't sell yourself short, from what Haley tells me you have a bright future ahead of you" at his words Sam blushed.

Noah chose that moment to speak, "Lucas is a published author"

"I know" Sam grinned at Noah and then turned to Lucas, "I heard your second book bombed"

Lucas gave a nod of acknowledgement, "it didn't do as well as my first"

"You writing anything new? Get back on the bike blah blah"

Eyes trailed to Noah, "No, not yet. I've had a lot going on and with working on the movie but who knows perhaps soon…"

"You could write a sequel for Ravens"

Lucas laughed, "That's a book better left closed"

Sam took another bite of her food before turning to Noah, "what do you think, Squirt, should your dad write another book?"

"I'm not allowed to read his books" Noah answered.

Shaking his head Lucas pointed his fork at Sam, "I thought we were talking about your writing?"

Shrugging her shoulder Sam smiled, "well I am all done, better go work on my history project" and she quickly went to rinse her empty plate and put it in the dishwasher.

Alone with his son Lucas then happily listened to Noah chat away about his current science project at school, it always surprised Lucas when Noah started one of his long explanations. The silence and short answers Noah gave were so frequent and then suddenly the boy changed and words spilled out. With a smile Lucas listened and his mind went to Brooke, despite the differences Lucas still saw so much of his ex in the child they had created together.

With dinner over Lucas cleaned up as Noah prepared for bed, when they were done Lucas Followed Noah to his room and they said goodnight to each other. Lucas placed his hand gently on Noah's shoulder as he lay in bed, "I will see you tomorrow. Sleep well".

Time ticked by, at ten Lucas went to check on Sam, the teenager opened the door "you off?"

"Yeah. Brooke should be home soon. Bye, Sam" he turned away but soon was stopped, facing her again Lucas sent Sam a questioning look.

Nervous Sam handed over the notebook, "I thought… maybe… you know, if you wanted… you could read this for me, tell me what you think"

He chuckled and smiled, Lucas took it and held it carefully "it will be my pleasure" he nodded at the teenager and she gave a quick goodbye.

After locking the house up Lucas took the steps to his car two at a time, one thing on his mind.

-x-

The sun had long set, the waves a dark blue as they crashed and rolled along the shore, Brooke stared out at the distant horizon where the stars met the ocean and you could be forgiven not knowing where one began and the other ended.

Eyes were sore, Brooke thought she had no tears left and then from the corner of her eye she saw the barefoot figure sit down beside her.

Lucas had found Brooke's car along the beach and then had seen her exactly where he had expected too. Slipping off his shoes and socks Lucas left them by the sand dunes and walked barefooted to Brooke and sat next to her, he didn't say a thing but he could see her eyes glistening and silently shrugged off his jacket and placed it over Brooke's shoulders then he wrapped one arm around her and Brooke's head fell against him.

They stayed there together in a moment outside time, soon Brooke stopped holding into the tears that were building again and let them out and Lucas held her closer.

Brooke raised her eyes to Lucas, "do you remember when you told me that I know who I am? Sometimes I wonder, Luke, if I know anything at all because all I seem to do is doubt everything I think and do. I've spent my whole life doubting what I'm worth, with my parents, with Noah, with Peyton-" she looked away and then back, "- with you"

"You're Brooke Penelope Davis. You are smart, creative, powerful, a presence in every room you walk into and every single person who has ever been in your life is lucky to know you. You are kind, giving, gentle and strong but you are vulnerable and I've told you it's beautiful, all of you is beautiful. You are worth so much more than you could ever imagine and anyone who can't see that well that's because of what they're missing not you" he continued to stare at her, "There is nothing to doubt. I know you, Brooke Davis."

His blue eyes spoke to Brooke, he always had the power to look right into her soul and sadly Brooke wondered how someone who seemed to know her so well, someone who saw who Brooke was before anyone else, seemed to sometimes get things just _so_ wrong. The thought of the past had Brooke blinking her tears away, she turned back towards the ocean and rested her head back against Lucas as his jacket and arm engulfed her.

When Lucas was comforted by Brooke's content sigh ten minutes later he squeezed her arm gently, "lets get you home" and like a similar night over seven years ago Lucas stood and held his hand out though this time there was no hesitation when Brooke took what he offered and let Lucas pull her up.

-x-

Peyton woke to the smell of cooking bacon, her nose twitched, for a minute Peyton didn't know if her stomach was going to roll over and empty its contents at the smell or dance in delight. To Peyton's joy her stomach settled and she stretched out before going in search for her breakfast.

Lucas was standing topless at the stovetop, a piece of bacon in his mouth, he hummed gently as he focused on the two fry pans. With her side leant against the doorframe Peyton cleared her throat, Lucas looked over his, "morning" he smiled.

Peyton walked over to her fiancé and gave him a kiss on the cheek before grabbing a plate for each of them, Lucas flipped the French toast over and then flipped them straight onto the plate followed soon by the bacon and eggs.

"What are your plans today?" Peyton asked when they sat across from each other though her mind was on the food grateful that her nausea was so rare these days.

Lucas shrugged, "nothing much, I'm going to take Noah to the beach and then to the library to do some research for a big project he has coming up"

"Sounds fun" Peyton quickly changed the subject, "I was thinking before you pick Noah up we could check out some furniture for the nursery"

"Sure" Lucas agreed easily and when they were at the store he thought back to the empty and fresh kids room he had been working on slowly. Lucas had wanted to have it finished by now but with everything going on he had fallen behind though watching Peyton's eyes light up at all furniture, toys and little baby things had Lucas happy that he had waited.

Peyton kept returning to the same cot and long combined dressing and change table, it was painted white with silver handles, "I like this" and they spent another fifteen minutes picking a few small things before paying and loading the car.

When they returned to the house Lucas made sure Peyton only carried the lightest of bags much to Peyton frustration, she grumbled as she watched Lucas move everything to the bedroom. They both knew Lucas would have to leave soon to pick up Noah, "I'll get Skills to come over tomorrow and help me put it all together"

With a smile Peyton covered her bump with her hand, Lucas couldn't help but notice how much she had popped over the last few weeks with each day seeming to grow double the amount of the day before. Then Lucas watched as her smile quickly faded and before his eyes Peyton began to crumple over, instinct speared Lucas forward ad he caught Peyton and held her up, "Peyt?"

"Ow" Peyton groaned gripping her stomach and panic filled Lucas, his stomach dropped, he caught her beneath her legs and Lucas lifted Peyton up.

"I've got you".

-x-

From her front window Brooke watched the quiet street, a small frown marred her perfect skin, Lucas should have picked Noah up an hour ago and Brooke's messages had gone unanswered. Noah was unware how late Lucas was, he has been ready from the morning and his day bag had been packed and left waiting by the door.

At the moment Noah was in his room occupying his time while Brooke waited, worries alone.

Her phone rung in her hand, Brooke answered it immediately "Luke, are you okay?"

"Hi, Brooke. I'm sorry to do this so late but I can't have Noah today" his tone was heavy, Brooke could hear the turmoil in Lucas' voice and knew he had no choice in this situation, Brooke knew something was wrong.

"Sure, that's fine… is everything okay?"

"I'm fine" his voice trembled.

Brooke sucked in a breath, "is Peyton okay?"

"Look… it's… I'll talk to you later Brooke, tell Noah I'm sorry and I will see him Monday" and the call was abruptly ended.

Despite the current state of their friendship the last thing Brooke wanted was Peyton to be hurt but Brooke as reminded that Peyton had Lucas to look out for her and right now she needed to focus on her own child.

It wasn't until there was a knock on the door that Brooke remembered the plans she had, with an apologetic face Brooke answered the door.

Julian's face fell, "why do I have the feeling you're about to back out of today?"

Brooke had decided to give Julian another chance and had been looking forward to their date today, "I'm sorry but something came up and I have Noah today"

"Oh"

A voice from behind Brooke cut in, "I can watch the little Einstein for ya so you can do… whatever two consenting adults want to do"

Brooke turned to Sam, "you shouldn't lose your Saturday"

"Jack was just going to come over anyway" the teenager shrugged and Brooke's expression turned even more negative.

Julian clapped his hands together, "I've got an idea, though I had a super romantic lunch planned at the most exclusive restaurant in Raleigh there is a carnival a couple of towns over" he smiled, "perhaps we could all go, even you Samson, and Jack of course, you two kids can go your separate way"

"You sure?" Brooke asked.

"Yeah! Snacks on me"

Sam chuckled, "I'm in" and she went to call Jack.

Seeing the smile on Sam's face Brooke whispered thank you to Julian and let him in to wait for them to all be ready. The way Julian was with the kids made Brooke more confident with her choice to give the producer a chance and her smile came back to her face.

-x-

As they walked through the outside door that leads to the kitchen Peyton stepped away, brushing aside Lucas' hand from her shoulder, Peyton dropped her bag onto the table her fingers pinching the bridge of her nose as she stood still thinking about the last couple of hours.

"Let's get you to bed" Lucas touched her lower back and Peyton allowed Lucas to lead her through the house as she walked in a daze, "the doctor said you need to rest."

When they reached the bedroom Peyton pushed Lucas away, blocking the doorway she held up her hand, "I'm fine, I can go to bed by myself"

"Peyt-"

"I need a minute" she deadpanned and Lucas was left to stare blankly at the closed door between them.

A few hours later Lucas quietly entered the room with a tray, Peyton was awake again leaning up on her pillows, her eyes red rimmed.

"I'm not hungry" she turned her cheek away.

Lucas went forward anyway, he left the juice and chicken salad on the empty side of the bed and sat next to Peyton, his hand rubbed her back. As much pain as he was in Lucas knew he needed to support Peyton, "you need to eat something"

"I don't need food at the moment. We haven't picked names or finished the nursery, how can…"

"We need a few days to process this, we can't just go through it all now"

Peyton turned her face to look at Lucas over her shoulder, "I don't need lunch and I don't need to process this, I don't know why I am even surprised, people always leave" her voice trailed off.

"You are not your mothers" Lucas was adamant, "I am scared too. Just the thought that we could lose you when you're having the baby is something I cannot even comprehend but the doctors are going to do everything they can to make sure you and the baby come out of this 100% healthy" he cupped her face, "our baby is going to grow up with their mother's hugs and kisses, you aren't going anywhere, okay?"

A single tear rolled down her cheek, "you can't promise that".

-x-

 **Thanks for reading. Please review and follow.**

 **I kind of always was frustrated with how the show handled the placenta previa storyline with Peyton's pregnancy. I always was shocked it seemed Peyton and Lucas talked as if they were recommended or were thinking of a medical abortion due to the condition in which case WTF! Did the show not do research? These days a mother dying from this is so rare, discuss a bloody (no pun intended) c-sec and premmie not ENDING THE PREGNANCY TO SAVE PEYTON. Roll eyes. They act like its so serious and then what happens to Peyton's bloody bed rest. I guess I was shocked by this storyline because I know a few friends who went through this complication as well as the fact my mother had placenta previa when she was pregnant with me and that was 30 years ago, she spent months on bedrest in hospital before I was delivered by emergency c-sec six weeks early. I think they should be stressed and scared but to question and argue over whether to have the baby, extreme much.**

 **-mickei**


	15. Everything You Want

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, and I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting. I do own a lot of cleaning products I have to use for my rent inspection but I've been too busy working on this (priorities :/ ).**

 **A big thanks to the reviewers and followers, I did my best to get this out as soon as I could. I started writing it and deleted it all a couple of times, to be honest a lot of this chapter was set a couple of chapters later and it wasn't until I scrapped two chapters that I got into the flow and kept writing it. Then I realised I needed at least one scene instead of just mentions. And here it is, kind of three planned chapter smashed into one.**

 **Okay so as I write this and plan to upload my internet has decided to play up, it has the worse timing, so I cannot comment personally to the reviews. Any non guest ones I will PM when I have the time, I know I really wanted to respond to some, there were some great ones with great comments and questions. There is an AN at the end that kind of addresses them vaguely. But even if I can't list people or be more specific because I will quickly upload this when I get a chance in case I have more internet problems, I want you to know I REALLY appreciate the comments. So a big thank you all. Hopefully this will be up soon. Enjoy.**

Chapter Fifteen

They sat on the couch next to each other, her face resting lightly against his shoulder as their eyes stared into each other. Julian cupped Brooke's cheek, he had just finished kissing her, his heart was full "I love you, Brooke Davis"

As soon as the words were out Julian knew he had pushed Brooke too far, her whole expression changed, her usually open eyes suddenly had a wall between them, the first thing she did was slap his chest before moving so fast away from him he wondered if she got whiplash.

Brooke frowned which made her look even cuter to Julian, "why would you _say that_ , you don't need to tell me that to get me into bed"

Julian laughed, "I'm saying it because it's what I feel, I am falling madly in love with you" he reached for her going in for another kiss but Brooke stood and quickly stepped backwards.

"I don't do that" she shook her head in shock, "I'm a mother for god's sake" she spat the words out as if they could protect her and Julian laughed more.

"What does that have to do with anything" he stopped laughing when he took note of her face, "Sorry I said anything, I didn't realise saying I love you was…" he seemed confused, "so wrong"

"You just caught me off guard"

"Okay, fine, I won't say I love you again even if I do in fact love you" he began to grin and Brooke cringed, her reaction was so over the top ridiculous Julian followed her with a smile as she tried leave the living room, he told her he loved her again and Brooke practically stamped her foot.

"Quit it!" she slammed her bedroom door between them and clicked the lock.

After twenty minutes of silence Brooke peeked her head out and slowly exited her room, barefoot she walked down the hallway and saw Julian sitting at the dining table on his laptop, "you're still here?"

"I didn't know you dated Ryan Reynolds" he answered.

Brooke quickly made it over to him, "where did you hear that?"

"It's this website, who dated who dot com, it lists everyone you've dated for the last five years"

"They can't do that!" Brooke yelled it outrage and went to close the laptop, Julian stopped her hand and moved the lap top away, Brooke looked over his shoulder, "but this is all wrong I never dated him, or met him" her head tilted, "yeah I would have dated her but no. Oh my god you cannot believe everything you read on the internet" she rolled her eyes.

"Yeah but even if you can believe half of it the sheer volume" he smiled at her, "wow!"

Brooke's mouth dropped, "okay" she quickly jumped over him and took the laptop, slamming it shut, "play time's over" she placed it behind her and protectively stood in front of the device, "why are you doing this?"

"Because I am trying to figure out why you got so freaked out by what I said"

"By examining my ex list? I dated a few guys in New York, so what?" she shrugged.

Julian stood, his eyes curious, "You weren't in love with any of them?"

She gave a little laugh, "I didn't have time for love okay, and even if I had Victoria would have never allowed it" Brooke licked her lips, "so there it is"

All traces of humour disappeared from Julian, "so the last time you were in love… now I get it" his voice lowered.

Brooke shrugged one shoulder and she folded her arms, "was a long time ago"

Julian turned around towards the small bookcase, Brooke stepped closer, "what are you doing?"

"If you have more than one copy of Lucas' book I am out of here" he was only half kidding, a quick surface look had Julian turning around.

Brooke stood meters away still with her arms folded, her hands hugging herself, "I am sorry if this is weird for you but you knew I have a past with Lucas"

"You still love him?" he asked it watching Brooke carefully.

Without blinking Brooke stared right at Julian, "No. I don't" the pause, the matter of fact emotionless way Brooke said it, the way her jaw tightened, all of it didn't settle well with Julian, the biggest thing he noticed was her eyes, they still had that wall over them.

"Yeah" he gulped, "that's what Peyton said"

Emotion flared back in Brooke, "First of all. Peyton fed me that story long before she told it to you, so I've been there. And second, I love her, but I'm not Peyton"

"I'm sorry but I have already been in a relationship that had the stench of Lucas Scott hanging over it"

"And how do you think I feel? I'm the girl who's dating the guy who came to town I the first place to get Peyton back while the father of my child is about to marry and have a baby with her"

"Okay, not exactly true but point taken"

Her brow kinked, Brooke stood her ground, "yeah, it sucks always being the footnote in someone else's love story"

"But you're right, you're not Peyton-" Julian smiled "- Their story is all about romance and destiny and fate, but you're different"

Brooke's brow kinked further, "um… thanks"

"I mean, Brooke Davis writes her own story like you did with your career and your company and Sam. You choose your own path"

"Yeah but you can't choose who you love."

"You're right. You don't. You can choose whether or not you open your heart to love" Julian's frustration began to show and Brooke helplessly defended herself.

"What do you want me to say?" she asked unable to give him what he wanted.

"How about, 'I love you too Julian'?"

Brooke dropped her arms, the wall dropping from her eyes and a hint of sadness and regret was there, "how about, I like you a lot… this is all happening really fast. We were meant to be taking it slow, having fun, and you know it's not that simple for me. I have Sam and Noah to think about"

Angry Julian shook his head "don't do that. Don't hide behind the kids"

"I'm not hiding"

"Yes, you are. You're a package deal and I knew that when I fell in love with you, Sam and Noah aren't an obstacle they're just two more reasons why I love you. You're an amazing mother, Brooke"

"This isn't so easy for me"

"Never let it be said that Brooke Davis is easy" he smiled sadly, "you know, you're not Peyton, and I'm not Lucas. And I don't know what you are waiting for but she's not going to come knocking on that door declaring her love for me-" Julian stopped suddenly as something flickered in Brooke's eyes. Stepping forward he went to touch Brooke, "is that what happened"

"It was a long time ago" Brooke sidestepped away from Julian's comforting touch and turned her back to him, her fingers gripped onto the cabinet behind her as she took a few hard breaths.

"In the book when you broke up with Lucas there was something missing, one minute everything was fine and then suddenly it was like… a bomb dropped and you just let him go"

"Julian" her tone told him to stop.

"She told you she was in love with him?"

Brooke turned around and he could see the truth in her eyes, "none of this matters"

"It matters if you keep protecting your heart so no one else can get in. I get it now, you were happy and then your best friend, one of the two people you loved most in the world, broke your heart"

"She didn't break my heart"

"Right. She ripped it out. I'm not going to do that" they stood facing each other.

Keys rattled in the lock and Sam walked in, followed by Victoria, "good day" the older woman greeted while Sam bounced her eyes between Julian and Brooke.

"We have to get ready for dinner" Brooke looked at Julian, he nodded.

Sounding cheerful Sam lifted a couple of shopping bags, "I've got some new crap-"

"I wouldn't call it crap" Victoria cut in, she eyed her daughter "we picked out something lovely that will suit your pale skin tone"

"Thanks" Brooke gritted out and left Julian to see her mother out.

Sam looked at him, her hands full, "did we interrupt something?"

With a smile Julian replied, "I can wait".

-x-

Arriving first at Nathan and Haley's house Lucas was welcomed warmly, Haley let the father and son in and quickly instructed Jamie to take Noah outside, both boys walked off dutifully and a slightly solemn Lucas followed Haley into the sitting room after a brief hug and kiss.

The two friends comfortably started talking but Haley could read the shadows in her brother-in-law's eyes, "where's Peyton?"

"She'll be here soon, she's at the studio" his mouth turned down.

Haley gave a kind smile, her voice echoed Lucas' worry "you don't sound happy about that"

The sigh that came from Lucas spoke volumes, a helplessness deep in it, Lucas shook his head and answered, "when she's not acting like her death is a foregone conclusion and practically planning her funeral Peyt is full steam ahead acting like nothing has changed. I just wish she would slow down a bit"

"She's scared, Luke"

"So am I but… never mind" he shook his head again and left his sentence unfinished, "how are you?"

"I think unemployment suits me" Haley grinned light-heartedly and cocked one shoulder, Lucas laughed, "It's nice actually, going back to my music, speaking of unemployment what are your plans?" and her tone turned cheeky.

"And back to me" Lucas turned around, "where's Nathan?" he changed the subject blatantly as he looked around for his brother. Haley grabbed Lucas by the arm, her mouth opened as she went to speak but was interrupted by the doorbell.

They went together, Haley dragging Lucas behind her, the loud voices of an arguing Sam and Brooke gave the next guests away. When the door opened the two brunettes were smiling widely, mouths closed, Julian behind them with a contrite expression on his face.

"Hi!" Brooke pushed forward and grabbed Haley in a tight hug, "save me from teenagers" she whispered in her friend's ear and then let go, "Luke" she nodded her head in his direction as greeting before walking inside the house.

Sam and Julian followed, the latter handed Haley a bottle of wine before giving Lucas' hand a shake.

From the direction of the back of the house Jamie and Noah appeared, they ran straight to Sam, Jamie grabbing the girl's hand while Noah stopped just before reaching her, both pleaded for her to come with them and she disappeared with the younger children.

"Oh, hi Noah, I missed you too" Brooke jokingly called after her son who was too far away to hear her, the other adults laugh.

Haley ushered everyone into the main living area and immediately poured everyone a glass of wine, "what's Sam done now?" Haley asked.

Brooke shivered, "she has hit an all-time low"

"Worse than stealing your ID?"

Brooke nodded, her eyes large, she shivered in disgust again unable to even say it, "she… _likes Victoria_ "

Lucas almost spat out the sip he had just taken, "no one likes Victoria"

"Exactly!" Brooke's arms went up in the air, "they go shopping and meet for coffee, she never took _me_ shopping" and then she looked directly at Lucas, "Noah even gets along with her. This is the woman who went to Milan instead of coming to my graduation, who… who… it's Victoria for God's sake!" her shoulders dropped, "when she said she was going to stay and be a… mother-" her lip curled up "- I gave her a week at most and she is _still_ here"

Haley didn't know what to say, her words were hesitant, "that's… ah… nice"

"Is it?" Brooke seemed unsure too, "just because she finally remembers she's the parent and writes one letter to some judge that doesn't erase twenty- three years of neglect, god Luke you are so lucky yours is dying" the last comment was said in true Brooke Davis flippant style and though Lucas shared the same sentiment the frozen looks on the others faces had Brooke turning, her mouth dropped.

Not far away Nathan stood, Brooke's mouth dropped briefly, "Nate I am so sorry, I didn't mean it like that" she struggled to apologise.

Joining them Nathan wore a frown, "don't worry about it, I know what you mean" and he quickly grabbed a beer for himself. There was silence for a moment, Brooke placed a hand on Nathan's back and gave a quick rub before leaving it there.

"To us he's Dan, the epitome of bad dads, a murderer, but to Jamie he's just Grandpa Dan and for some reason he sees something in Dan that he loves"

"That boy has a big heart and Jamie's going to be alright because he has one of the best dads there is" Brooke smiled at her friend.

The silence that followed was filled with emotion as they all briefly thought of each other's heartache with their parents, Lucas thoughts went to Brooke as he watched her through his eyelashes and he lifted his head his dusky blue gaze soaking Brooke in while her attention was away from him. Brooke always wore her emotions in her sparkling eyes, it was one of the many reasons why Lucas found himself staring into her eyes so much. Lucas' vision cleared, the rest of the room came into focus and his eyes were drawn to Brooke's right and Lucas found himself being stared down by Julian who watched Lucas with a crease in his brow.

-x-

The doorbell rang again and Brooke immediately went to find the children doing her best to hold off seeing Peyton. It might have been very adult of them all to be here together breaking bread however Brooke wasn't completely comfortable at the prospect and was sure she wasn't the only one. She reached the backyard and saw Noah sitting in a tree, his eyes on the sky, and Brooke remembered why they were all there.

A hand touched Brooke's shoulder, she turned and smiled at Haley, the other woman smiled back and then yelled for the kids to come inside.

They all walked into the dining room together, more greetings were exchanged and Brooked did her best to smile at Peyton knowing what her old friend was going through and even if Peyton wasn't speaking to Brooke right now she knew the blonde will need her even if Peyton would not admit it.

The night was going well, as smoothly as it could with the undercurrents that ran between everyone. There were even a few laughs, the boys finished dinner first and were growing bored, Haley put a movie on for them and they ate dessert on the couches. Sam remained with the adults at the dining table as they all chattered and finished off the wine, Peyton wore a dark expression and a sad smile though did her best to participate.

Lucas grabbed Peyton's hand under the table and squeezed, Sam's voice had him lifting is head to the teenager, "sorry about your movie" she told him.

"That's alright, we had to cut so much it was barely my story anymore." Lucas shrugged, he slipped his hand from Peyton's and leant against the table.

"I finished your book"

"Sam!" Brooke groaned.

"You were my favourite character" Sam told her foster mother and then grinned at Lucas, "I thought the ending was a little lame"

"Uh… thanks" Lucas chuckled, "I emailed you my comments about your latest few chapters, it's great by the way"

"I know it"

Lucas saw the sparkle in her dark eyes and chuckling still he raised his brow at Brooke, "you sure she's not our secret kid too?" the comment slipped out without thought, he saw himself in the teenager and her heartfelt writing yet looking at those devious dark eyes and constant barbs Lucas saw Brooke in the girl she had taken on.

An odd air went around the table, Peyton straightened up, Lucas didn't understand why the comment made everyone uncomfortable after all Noah had been with them for so many months now he thought everyone had gotten use to the situation. It was simply fact that he shared a child with Brooke.

His joy subsided, Lucas' eyes narrowed further, "I look forward to the next bit"

Julian placed a hand over his heart "feeling a little hurt you ditched me for a basketball coach"

Sam placed a finger on her chin, "hmmm, who to get writing advice from published bestselling author or director? If you think about it…"

Nudging the teen next to him Julian rolled his eyes, "I get it"

"She is very talented" Lucas defended Sam and Haley nodded.

Julian was quick to comment, "and she knows it"

Sam took the compliments and then leant forward 0ver the table stretching her neck so she was as close as she could be to Lucas who sat down the other end on the opposite side, "you were only like nineteen when you got your novel published right?"

"Yes"

"That must have been cool" Sam hid how impressed she was but her next words had an excitement in them "what did you do when you found out? Like the first thing you did? I would be spending that advance"

Brooke coughed at the question and for a brief second Lucas eyes strayed to his ex, no one seemed to notice except Brooke who looked away and quickly finished the glass of wine in front of her.

"I uh called a friend, you know, share the good news" Lucas sat back.

Unaware of the emotions running turmoil inside her fiancé Peyton sat up showing interest, a smile on her face "I've never actually heard this story" she looked at Sam and then back to Lucas "That was just after we broke up. So, you called Haley before your Mom?"

Haley laughed, without thinking she spoke "no. I heard it third hand from Nathan who heard it from Deb who heard it from Karen. Then I called Lucas to yell at him, he was already in New York by that time celebrating with Br…" as soon as she started saying the name Haley started to rethink what she was saying but it was too late and with a hesitant pause Haley finished, "-ooke."

"I was living in New York back then" Brooke explained without looking at Lucas, "as I recall Lucas did a lot of complaining about Lindsey wanting to change his story"

"I don't remember that" Lucas looked to Brooke

"Free Champaign will do that" Nathan laughed and then he winced.

"Ready for dessert?" speaking fast Haley stood up from the table, Nathan gave her a strange look wondering why his wife has kicked him.

Peyton had become unusually silent, her eyes watching everyone at the table, Haley went around grabbing a few of the left over dirty dishes while Sam asked a few questioned about Lucas publishing his first novel, it wasn't until Haley was back with the cake for dessert that Peyton stood up and excused herself.

A moment after Peyton left Lucas followed her, Peyton was at the kitchen sink "hey, are you feeling okay?"

"You called Brooke first"

"She's my friend, I had to go to New York and she was there"

"That's it?" Peyton asked, "because sitting at that table I got the impression there's more to this story which I for someone reason I have never heard before, so is that all that happened?"

Lucas stood on the spot, he could hear the quiet outrage in Peyton and straight away wanted to go on the defensive "we weren't together at the time"

"Not the question I asked!" Peyton's voice raised.

"We got drunk, we kissed, that's all." Lucas just got it out, "It doesn't matter, Peyton, this was over four years ago"

"If that's all why am I just hearing about it now"

"Because we didn't talk for three years! When do I say oh by the way Peyton after we broke up I saw Brooke this one time and one thing led to another and I kissed her"

 _I kissed her_. The words went around Peyton's head, she placed a hand on her stomach, hormones were racing through her and Peyton had to fight not to cry. Perhaps if she was not pregnant she could think clearly, perhaps if she wasn't already holding anger towards Brooke inside her then Peyton wouldn't be so upset or angry over a kiss from four years ago.

In the dining room the others sat, Peyton and Lucas' voices carrying in. Sam let out a deep breath, "and I thought what happened in the book was dramatic" the teen whispered.

Peyton held the bridge of her nose between her fingers, "okay, is there anything else I should know?"

"What? Between Brooke and me? No, of course not"

"Right" she glared at him, "don't joke about having more kids with her"

"Okay. I am sorry for that"

Her hand lifted to stop him, Peyton shook her head and went back to join the table. Together they all quietly ate their dessert, slowly conversation began again, and soon Sam left them to join the boys and the adults went outside for some fresh air.

The sun had not set yet, Nathan asked Lucas if he wanted a quick game and Lucas then asked Julian, "I'll pass" Julian shook his head.

Brooke cuddled against Julian and the other men went to start the game, Peyton saw the smile on Brooke's face and watched as Julian placed a kiss on Brooke's cheek.

"Haley" Peyton turned to Haley, "I've been meaning to ask you, would you be my maid of honour?"

The question shocked Haley, she sent Brooke a quick look and the brunette lowered her eyes, Haley tried to smile "of course" and they hugged. It was an awkward moment because they all were aware Peyton had previously asked Brooke before Noah's existence came out.

Still angry Peyton then began to talk about the new wedding dress she had picked out, Brooke snapped, "I know you're going through a lot but you don't have to be such a bitch"

Peyton laughed, "me a bitch? I'm sorry. You're the one who lied about being pregnant and then waited six years to tell us, called me a backstabbing bitch but got Lucas drunk and made your move, just like you did with Nathan" her words weren't quiet.

Just about to start their game Nathan and Lucas stopped, their attention drawn to the deck.

"Excuse me. I never made a move on Lucas when he was with you, contrary to what you believe you don't own Luke, Peyton, you don't get to own his every second of his life. You were _never_ together when anything ever happened between Lucas and me. Not in high school and not after, and don't throw Nathan at me. You dumped him as well and yes what I did was a shitty thing but I _never_ ever went after any one of your boyfriends so _DON'T_ try to make yourself feel better about what you did by acting like I ever did the same thing" Brooke's face was red.

"At least I'm not a lying slut"

"You should be _thanking_ me for being a 'lying slut' because it got you here" Brooke used air quotes, "you have Lucas, you are having his baby and wearing his ring, why are you so angry? This isn't a competition but you won Peyton, you won!"

"I should thank you, for what? For lying? For waiting until we were having our first child and then telling us about your kid"

"I had no choice, I had to tell Lucas then. Would it have been better for you back in high school? I didn't have to break up with Lucas, I didn't have to say no to him in that hotel room in New York when _he_ kissed me and asked me to stay, so yeah maybe you should thank me Peyton for stepping out of your way, not that me being there ever stopped you anyway"

Nathan and Lucas reached them, "this isn't helping anyone" Lucas tried to say but his voice went unheard.

With two steps Peyton had moved closer to Brooke, "Like I believe anything you have to say, you got lucky it was Luke who actaully knocked you up with the way you slutted around"

Brooke almost slapped Peyton but she held back remembering Peyton was indeed pregnant, Lucas grabbed Peyton's hand, "Peyton!" he yelled in disapproval.

At the same time Julian stepped in front of his girlfriend, "don't, don't talk to her like that"

"You think she actually cares about you?" Peyton turned her attention to Julian, "or is she with you just to get back at me?"

"Peyton stop" Lucas hissed.

Julian stopped Brooke from holding him back, "despite your behaviour, both now and in the past, you're better than this, Peyton. Don't yell at Brooke when she has done nothing to you, she didn't get herself pregnant"

"She's got you wrapped around her finger too, Saint Brooke she's not"

Julian shook his head, "have some respect Peyton, you're the last person who should speak"

"Julian stay out of it" Lucas turned his anger onto Julian.

"She called Brooke a lying slut" Julian gave Lucas a withering look and then sent Peyton a glare, "you sit on your high horse judging Brooke for having consensual relationships with single men as if that's some crime meanwhile you had no problem telling Brooke you were in love with Lucas when she was still with him"

Peyton's jaw dropped, she stumbled on her words, Brooke closed her eyes, and Lucas looked between Julian and Peyton, then Brooke and then Peyton again.

Voice commanding Lucas gently pulled Peyton to his side, "we're going. Sorry everyone" and he left with a silently fuming Peyton.

In a whisper Brooke sighed, "Julian"

"Somebody had to stop her"

"I was doing fine by myself"

"That's the point, you shouldn't have to defend yourself"

Haley was still slightly shocked, "he's right Brooke, that should not have happened. Peyton was out of line"

"She's just scared at the moment" Brooke defended Peyton despite the fight they just had, "I should have ignored her. I started it".

Caught between two good friends Nathan wasn't happy, "she still shouldn't have said what she did. Julian's right Brooke, you haven't done anything to Peyton"

"Calling her a bitch was probably not a good start though" Haley joked.

Turning back into her normal cheery self, Brooke scrunched her nose up, "but kind of true" she smacked her lips, "and on that note-" she playfully slapped Julian's chest "- we should probably go home".

-x-

The car ride home was silent, both fuming, Peyton and Lucas entered their home with tight expressions. Peyton threw her purse down and Lucas closed the door with slightly more force than needed.

Ready for a conversation Peyton was shocked when Lucas walked by her without looking in her direction, Peyton followed, "Luke?"

"Not now Peyton, let's just get ready for bed" and he disappeared to have a shower, Peyton waited a minute and then went to join him. Naked she stepped in and wrapped her arms around Lucas, her large baby bump resting against Lucas' back.

A large sigh came from him, Lucas let the warm water run over them, Peyton then began to wash Lucas and after a few minutes he took over and then helped Peyton. More relaxed Peyton went to kiss Lucas but he shifted his body and left the shower and grabbed his towel.

When the two of them slipped into bed Peyton couldn't bare the distance between them, "do you have something to say?"

"Trust me, Peyton, you don't want to do this now"

"Do what?" she grabbed his pillow from under him, "I am so angry at you!" her anger was quiet, she sounded as if she was talking about what to have for breakfast.

Lucas snatched the pillow back, "I'm _furious_ with you. I have told you time and time again not to make trouble with Brooke and yet you couldn't help yourself"

"This is my fault? Why are you always defending Brooke? I'm the one wearing your ring!"

Lucas swore, "that doesn't give you a pass to do what ever you like, Brooke is our friend, she is my son's mother and has never done anything to you. She did this to _me_ , to _me_ , Peyton, not you"

"She couldn't even wait a week to try to get you into bed after we broke up!"

"No" Lucas jumped from the bed, "She didn't, she was a good friend to me that night and was exactly what I needed, she got me to that room safe and when I was stupid she left me there alone. Brooke showed us the utmost respect that night, as she has continued to conduct herself ever since. Yell at me not her"

"She called me a bitch" Peyton spat, her anger growing at Lucas.

Lucas tsked, "and what did you do for her to say that?"

Shocked Peyton gaped at Lucas, she watched her fiancé pace the room, he stopped, Lucas faced the door but he tilted his head to look slightly at Peyton, his hand running through his hair, "what did Julian mean when he said you told Brooke you were in love with me while she was with me?"

Watching him Peyton rolled her eyes and gave a mocking laugh, "Julian doesn't know what he is talking about"

"So why don't you explain it to me"

"Like you said before it was over four years ago" Peyton's eyes grew wider, "I didn't want a repeat of our junior year so I told Brooke the truth, I was and am in love with you"

"When was this?" he turned to look at her not sure why he wanted to know, not sure what good it would do after so many years.

Peyton looked away, "after Nathan and Haley's rehearsal dinner"

"That's why you two were fighting?" Lucas closed his eyes, "that's why she broke up with me"

"No, no, no. Brooke told you why she ended it she said it wasn't because of me"

Laughing Lucas couldn't believe how naïve Peyton was being, "and you believe that? I didn't. That's why I came to you and poured my heart out and you said _nothing_ "

"Need I remind you what you wrote, everything else was a denial of the truth _I was and would always be in love with Peyton Sawyer_ "

"I do love you Peyton, I chose you, I want to make a life with you but that doesn't mean I didn't deserve the truth"

"Right" Peyton scoffed, "because I'm the one who lied to you"

"Just because Brooke did something wrong doesn't mean that you haven't"

"You're not innocent in any of this" her voice was eerily calm next to Lucas' reserved anger.

"Is it my fault you never told me? I can understand why you confessed your feelings to Brooke what I don't understand is why I am finding out about it over five years later instead of back then when it mattered"

"Like you said it doesn't matter now" she sounded exasperated.

Lucas looked confused, "but a kiss from years ago does matter?"

Sitting on her knees on the bed Peyton rubbed her stomach, shaking her head without even realising it, "it's not the same thing. It's not the same thing at all"

"You're right because you lied straight to my face" Lucas said it slowly.

"And you tried to fuck my best friend"

His face repelled, "it wasn't like that"

"What was it like then? One day you're asking me to marry you and the next you're in a hotel room with Brooke" she said it with disgust, her eyes narrowed and her chin lifted.

"Peyton-"

"Don't Peyton me. What would have happened Luke if Brooke hadn't said no?" she held in the scoff knowing the answer, Lucas said nothing and Peyton sent him a sad smile "I thought so"

"This was four years ago, I was drunk and heartbroken if you remember"

Her voice begun to rise, Peyton hugged her belly "so you decided that Brooke would make you feel better? How should I feel about this especially now that I have Noah as a constant reminder that you two were together, why didn't you tell me about New York, why was it Brooke you called when you found out about your book, why was she even a consideration while you were sitting at the airport before you called me and asked me to _marry you_? That wasn't four years ago, Lucas. This isn't just some ex, that's meant to be my best friend" she sighed "the mother of your child" it all hit Peyton again. Her body fell against the bed, tears falling from her eyes "I just… I just can't deal with this right now"

"I know, I know" Lucas returned to the bed and covered Peyton's hand with his own, "you have so many emotions going on right now, I knew we shouldn't have started this. I'm hurting too Peyton but I need you to be honest with me, don't attack Brooke, you don't need to worry about that. I am here for you and our baby" he covered her stomach, "and nobody is going to go anywhere. We will get through this, I will take care of you both"

"I can't handle any more surprises"

Lucas let his anger go, he had to focus on the present and the future not the past, in another time he could let his anger simmer but Lucas knew he had to forgive Peyton in the same way he forgave Brooke, for his children's sake.

He softened his tone, "we need to listen to the doctor, you need to rest, stay away from stress. Let Haley take care of Red Bedroom and I will take care of you"

"I'm sorry, I am so sorry, I don't know what got into me" still crying Peyton buried her head against Lucas, and in that moment the two of them forgot about all the words left unsaid.

-x-

Without complaint Julian carried a sleeping Noah into his bedroom and watched as Brooke covered the boy with his blankets and gently kissed Noah's forehead. Sam said goodnight as Brooke walked Julian outside, alone they stopped at his car.

"Thanks for earlier, I do appreciate everything you do"

He smiled, "I love you, I would do anything for you"

The words had Brooke's lashes flicker down as she hid her expression, "Julian… this is too fast. I appreciate how great you have been but I am not ready for love"

"I think you do love me or you could love me but you're too stubborn to admit it because you're afraid of getting hurt again. I'm just asking you to open your heart to the possibly of love… preferably with me"

"The movies finished" Brooke said instead, "you're leaving Tree Hill"

Eyes staring at her Julian put on his best charming grin, "give me a reason to stay" his grin grew more, "or come with me. I can be a father to Sam and be there for Noah, you can have it all"

"I can't go, everything I care about is here and I can't ask you to stay" she shook her head, "not when I can't say the words back"

"So that's it?"

Brooke's lips parted, she looked up to the skies for an answer, "I can't choose the way I feel, I care about you. Too much to ask you to wait for me to be ready"

"You're going to let someone else into that heart of yours again one day Brooke Davis" he promised and gave a sad smile, "I guess that day is just not today"

"I'm sorry"

To Brooke's surprise Julian gave her one last kiss, "when you are ready, remember me" he whispered, "this isn't goodbye" and with that promise Julian drove away. On the curb Brooke gave a wave, "goodbye, Julian" deep down the brunette knew she would never see the producer again. And she never did.

-x-

 **Thanks for reading. Please review and follow.**

 **I know this chapter was very dialogue heavy, hope it flowed alright. I'm a bit of a talker so I worry that when I get going on the characters talking my own tendencies come through too much. It's very back and forward and sometimes short but that's how I view these conversations happening so details sometimes disappear between the yelling.**

 **I really enjoyed the feedback I have been getting I loved hearing peoples thoughts and where they see it going, what they like, what they think is off. Not that I always agree. There is an outline for this story and it is not short (think over the course of years in the timeline) and though there will be some significant time jumps nothing is happening overnight. Needless to say some readers will like the choices I make and others would prefer something else, I really put thought it what was going to happen and the timing of it all and settled on my plan. Some things you guys are really going to hate (sorry in advice) but things just need to run the course so when you think NOOOO WHY just hold your breath and trust me there are reasons, though you still may hate me lol. Peyton isn't just going to disappear in a puff of smoke (ooh will she die…. Or won't she, I won't spoil) but whatever happens BL are end game, sorry for anyone who is still reading and thinks there's a chance this LP is endgame, ah no, I am rewriting season 6 for a reason. But I'm not going to just have Lucas abandon his family, I think Lucas would do anything to not be the bad guy, to not abandon his pregnant fiancée. He's not going to think damn I still like Brooke here's my chance and ignore the fact he made a commitment to Peyton and they are expecting a child. He is torn and going to do his best to be there for everyone and this is not the time to be leaving anyone. He forgave Brooke and stood by her side for Noah's sake and because he cares about Brooke, he is not trying to do the same thing with Peyton for the same reason.**

 **On the plus side, Julian is gone! He isn't coming back. So feel free to dance along to another one bites the dust.**

 **Mickei**


	16. Because of You

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, and I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting. I do own way too many candles that have never been lit.**

 **Thanks to the reviewers for their fantastic feedback. Thanks to the guest reviewers as well New to Brooke, Brookelucas, Lileen, Bobolina (lol you put a big smile on my face, hope its not too distracting), Callison, Brucas, Dianehermans, princesakarlita411, bjq, Tania K.**

 **Brucaslove, more bonding is coming I promise.**

 **WMC, the SL is already set after the attack, its began shortly after Brooke saved Sam from Xavier.**

 **BrucasLove, in my mind BL had so much sex in the past I couldn't flashback to BL making Noah, they couldn't pin down that memory. That being said BL sex scene will eventually happen whether it's a flashback… or not.**

 **And this was a particular guest review I wanted to answer:** I may be the minority here, but I feel that Brooke needs someone to champion for her. Yes, I ship Brucas, but lets face it, they will not be getting together any time soon. Brooke messed up by not telling Lucas that she was pregnant with his child & he forgave her. Its been years since they have been together and he is in a relationship with Peyton (whom I dislike) and he will not be leaving her. If she is not looking to be in a relationship atm, then she needs to disassociate from Lucas & Peyton b/c the triangle just does not seem to stop. Co-parenting and only co-parenting is the way to go. Brooke is strong and she needs to stay that way. When and if they get back together, PLEASE have Lucas pursue her and fight for her, do not make Brooke give chase first.

 **I would like to say I completely agree, because of the timing this isn't going to be easy, the triangle is something none of the characters want and try to actively avoid even as it pulls them in.**

 **And on another note, one review also said they don't want Brooke to second for Lucas. IMO Brooke is never Lucas' second choice. Never ever. She's his first choice but due to his reasons he settles for other choices, like when Brooke broke up with Lucas even though she was in love with him. IMO the love triangle has fucked with Lucas just as much as the girls, and that will be addressed within this fanfic.**

 **So here is…**

Chapter Sixteen

As he sat focused, all his concentration on the board in front of him, Brooke saw even more of his father in Noah, those narrow brooding eyes on full display. Already Brooke saw day to day changes in Noah, her son was still very much Noah yet at the same time he was becoming more open, more expressive, and he no longer wore that _why are we doing this_ face, in fact Brooke was pleased that every now and then he would even let her read to him snuggled together in his bed until he fell asleep.

To this day though Brooke had never beaten Noah at any of their games which sometimes made her feel a little out of her league even if she loved that time with him, today though Brooke was winning and Noah knew it. Victoria sat next to Brooke, her close position made Brooke feel slightly awkward yet with Victoria's slight guidance Brooke was able to keep up with Noah's fast paced mind. The challenge both excited and frustrated Noah.

With bated breath went to take her move, Victoria gave a slight cough and Brooke changed her plan. Victoria tapped a finger on her right hand three times and Brooke shifted to the third piece to her hands right, and Noah's eyes widened.

"Um… what do I say… check might" she twitched her nose "oh that's right, check mate" and Brooke gave an excited squeal.

With a pleased smile Noah held out his hand, "good game"

"Thank you" they shook hands and then Noah started to pack away, "I didn't know you knew how to play chess" Brooke addressed her mother.

"I use to play a lot as a child, my grandfather taught me. There are some things you don't know about me, dear" a teasing tone in her voice and then she softened "Noah reminds me a lot of my grandfather" the words made Brooke smile but her smile dropped when Victoria continued sounded more like her usual self "not in looks of course, Noah has too much of that father in him for that. Grandfather was a very intelligent man, a gentle soul"

"I wish I could have met him"

"That would have been nice, my father was not… well, I suppose you would say he was more like me"

"I don't remember him"

"Yes well, you did not miss much, the view of his back was not very exciting. You look very much like my mother, even more so than me, with the dimples and your darker eyes" Victoria's voice trailed off. Brooke had never heard much about her grandmother, as a child she had thought her dead and could not remember exactly why she thought that. It wasn't until Brooke was eleven that Brooke learnt anything of the truth, she could still remember the screaming and crashes that day and her father showing a rare parental moment and taking Brooke out of the house for ice cream. Unlike the mood of the house the day outside had been perfect, warm and sunny, the scent of flowers in the air. That's when Brooke had discovered her grandmother had only just died, Victoria having been informed of her will, for the next week perhaps the whole month Victoria had never been far from a bottle of whisky or wine. It was Brooke's father that fine day that had explained to Brooke that Beverly Montgomery had left her husband and daughter when Victoria was seven years old and never saw them again.

Another memory came to Brooke, a fight with her mother when she was fourteen, angry and resentful Brooke had yelled at Victoria that she might as well just leave and never come back. For the first and only time Victoria had gone to slap Brooke and though the teenager had flinched her mother's hand never made contact, instead Victoria had called Brooke an ungrateful, selfish little girl and warned the teenager that smiling her way through life and expecting her hand to be held was not going to achieve anything.

Noah grinned, "I have Mom's dimples" he put them on show as he said it, leaning up across the dining table and while Brooke was still speechless, reeling from the word Mom coming from Noah, Victoria leant over and pinched Noah's cheek. Brooke didn't want to draw attention to what Noah had said too afraid it would make the boy self-conscious and he won't say it again.

Anyone would think they were any normal family in this moment, Victoria the doting grandmother, "and they're even more charming on you"

"Your mother must have been very beautiful if she looked like my Mom"

"Your mother is much prettier" Victoria smiled and stood up, "why don't you get ready for school and go wake Samantha, that girl sleeps in far too much".

Brooke waited for Noah to leave, "what was she like?"

"Who, dear?" Victoria feigned ignorance, smoothing her jacket over her chest.

Unsure whether to drop it Brooke answered quietly, "your mother. You never talk about her"

"I barely remember the woman, Father burned all her photos after she left"

"Yet you remember what she looks like" Brooke shrugged, "I know we… I still have a hard time with-" she motioned her hands between the two of them, "-this. But I want you to know that it did matter to me, you staying, always coming back. It does matter"

Something in Victoria's eyes flickered and she sat back down, "I remember she was always laughing and smiling, she used to dance all the time, twirling around the house as if it was a ballroom. Every day she would take me shopping, looking beautiful was her job it seemed. I didn't realise it then but she would flirt all day, with everyone, men and women, charming them with her smile and her eyes. And then she was gone and it seemed all the fun went with her, I was so young and charmed by the same thing that everyone else was. But my mother was a selfish, childish woman who cared only about herself. She married my father for the money and then spent as much as she could, she thought she had found someone better, grander and richer but the charmer was charmed by someone elses lies. I guess she still thought herself in love and dreamt that she could live off my father without living with him but she was mistaken, beautiful she was but not very bright. My father had very little money of his own and she spent more than he had, the money was my grandfathers so she left expecting to get more and instead ended up with nothing" Victoria laughed, "a year or two later she showed back up begging to come home, my father threw her out, it was only then than she wanted to take me with her, or more likely the money she would be given for raising me. Grandfather would not have that, he took care of it. And that was it, it's all rather sad and pathetic" Victoria met Brooke's eyes, "never rely on charm Brooke, you have far more than that, we must remember that in the end we can only rely on ourselves"

"Isn't that sad though, going through life never being able to rely on anyone around you"

"That's why it's important to choose wisely" Victoria gave Brooke a telling look which caused Brooke to roll her eyes. Victoria scoffed and changed the subject to work though her words echoed in Brooke's mind.

To their surprise Sam came down the stairs, already dressed for school in ripped jeans and a black shirt with her signature heavy mascara, "what's cooking?" she asked immediately.

Brooke smiled, "we've all eaten. There's some omelette you can heat up"

"Cool" Sam quickly did so then came over with her plate, she sat next to Brooke leaning over to look at the designs spread out before Brooke, "these are alright, I like that top"

"You have good taste" Victoria complimented.

Brooke still looking at her newest designs gave a sideways smile, "she steals only the best" and Sam chuckled at the comment and continued to eat.

As soon as Sam was done Brooke told her to go finish getting ready just as Noah reappeared, Victoria straightened the boys tie, "are you sure you don't want me to take Noah to school?"

"I already told you Lucas is picking him up" Brooke wanted to sigh yet she held it in as Victoria made a sound showing exactly what she thought about that. Brooke left her designs at the table and walked over to Noah, gently pulling him away from her mother, "are you ready?"

"Yes"

"Okay, go say goodbye to Sam" she smiled as he walked back off and then turned to her mother, "you don't have to like Luke but please try to keep that to yourself when Noah is around"

"I apologise, I cannot help remembering what that boy did to you. He's not good enough for you, Brooke"

"He doesn't have to be, Lucas isn't for me, he is for Noah and he loves his son"

"Very well" Victoria did not look convinced and when Lucas arrived they shared a frosty greeting which immediately melted from Lucas when Noah came into his sight.

Standing in front of her own mother Brooke smiled, "I will walk you out" and she carried Noah's bag with her to Lucas' car. Noah strapped himself in as his parents stood by the driver's side, they had barely spoken the last few weeks not since Lucas' apology for Peyton's behaviour, he had tried to broach the subject about their past and Brooke had not allowed it.

It seemed to hang between them, both keenly aware how too many years and too many choices stood between them. They were not the same people they were back then and it was dangerous to imagine they were, it was easy when they were apart, standing next to Lucas and being so close she could feel the heat coming from his body had memories rush to the service, memories better left forgotten.

Lucas both craved and feared being close to Brooke, his conflicted feelings made every second in her presence feel like he was on the edge of a cliff, wondering if he should look down or step back. The worse thing that Lucas could never admit was how alive it made him feel.

"Do you need me to pick Noah up today?"

"No, I can do it. I just have an appointment I have to get to this morning"

"Okay, thanks for calling me"

"You're his father, of course I'd ask you first" she stopped, her voice turning husky, a stray strand of her fell down her cheek tickling her skin. Lucas' fingers itched to brush it behind her ear, he clenched his fist, "bye Luke" she stepped back.

With a nod Lucas opened his door and sent Brooke a small wave.

Before the car left the driveway, Brooke went back inside, she started to collect her things, "I will meet you at the store later. Thanks for taking Sam to school" bag under her arm Brooke called out loudly, "I'm off, bye Sam!".

The teenager called loudly back to Brooke from her room and Brooke paused for a moment before giving a friendly farewell to her mother.

Victoria sighed and waited a few moments then she called loudly, "Samantha! Time to go"

Popping her head over the bannister Sam frowned, "we still have ages"

"I thought we could go for a drive first"

"Uh… thanks but no" Sam tilted her head.

With another sigh Victoria held out her keys, they jingled between her fingers, "I should have clarified. I thought _you_ could go for a drive" and Victoria smirked as Sam practically jumped down and snatched the leys from Victoria.

"Don't mind if I do".

-x-

It wasn't a long drive before Brooke reached her destination, she had driven by Nathan and Haley's house and followed the street down parking in a drive way thirteen houses down from her friends place. The large colonial style house stood two story's high, the bottom half was the reddish-brown tones of the brick work, the top half had white panelling, the rooftops were dark and the window trimmings all white, the large front porch had thick white pillars holding it up and Brooke's heart warmed. Despite its size the house looked homey and warm, manicured lawns and simple gardens added colour and warmth to front and with a large smile Brooke was happy to wave at the realtor. They shook hands and he ushered Brooke up the three steps to the porch and large dark door, "Miss Davis I am so glad you could make it" Grant the realtor brimmed with excitement.

"When I saw the for sale sign up I couldn't resist, I love this neighbourhood and my best friends live just down the street"

"It's a great area with lovely views of the river"

"Is there access from the property?"

"Yes, here I will take you around back first" moving away from the door Grant led Brooke along the porch, another set of steps to the left of the house followed a path largely hidden by a hedge, Grant unlocked the gate and Brooke walked through. They made their way down the cobbled path, Grant pointing out the features.

"This side of the house is the master suite, the first level of the yard is grass and the deck, it leads to the covered terrace of the main living area which gains access to the house, there is also a small porch at the back right that has access to the yard. The Deck has a separate entrance to the second level to get to the pool area which has its own decked entertainment area" they made it to the deck and Brooke looked out, the glass panels allowed an uninterrupted view of the pool area and yard ahead.

Brooke declined to venture further to the pool and they made their way back down the deck along the grass. The second level was paved outside the pool area, Brooke eyed the stone benches and pots before quickening her steps to reach the third level closest to the river. Huge trees and the pristine grass had Brooke imagining football games at Thanksgiving.

"There is a gate that leads straight to the river shore"

There was a barely scene fence dividing the river from the grassed area, a long metre high hedge discretely covered it except where a small iron gate opened up. Standing on front of it Brooke looked out at the river.

"There is a path that leads to the private jetty and to the boat house, the previous owners didn't use it"

"It's massive"

"Most of the properties along the road are generous in size, the Danville's employed a gardener that has taken magnificent care of the gardens and lawns here"

"I can see" Brooke smiled and turned to head back to the house, Grant hurried to catch up, leading Brooke through the side gate he locked it before he headed along the front porch again to the front door, "you have to experience the beautiful foyer"

Brooke was impressed yet at the same time her imagination was changing and adding things to make to pristine house warmer. By the stairs Brooke could imagine a huge Christmas tree filling the space with the smell of pine, the sunken formal dining room to the right would be a welcome hug on the occasions everyone came over, Brooke could imagine the banquet laid out in view of the Christmas tree in December.

The library to the left was filled with warm wood and floor to ceiling bookshelves, Brooke could not imagine filling them yet she thought Noah would love it, she pictured the piano she would place by the window and working on here designs at a huge desk while Noah read or practiced.

The master suite was separate to the rest of the bedrooms on the second floor however Brooke noticed the staircase leading up was right near it and the elegance of the space appealed to the designer in Brooke.

Brooke took in the 'grand room' as Grant called it, a large formal lounge area that opened to the terrace and deck, and then entered the open kitchen living area to the right of the house. A small breakfast nook had access to the sunroom which wall length windows allowed an excellent view of the river and pool area, Brooke could imagine Sam laughing with a cup of coffee as she lounged surrounded by sunlight or pouring rain.

There was separate staircase in the area off the kitchen that also opened into a mudroom and had another access to the laundry, as well as the three-car garage and the porch that led outside.

They used the back staircase to reach the next floor, Brooke was shown three bedrooms with their walk-in closets and bathrooms, "I think I will need a cleaner" Brooke joked, "not sure what I would do with all this space" the second floor also had a large loft.

"You would be amazed, when you have the space how quickly you run out of it" Grant let Brooke into the fourth and last bedroom upstairs, differing from the others the bathroom led to the walk-in closet, Brooke opened the door and her jaw dropped. The 'closet' was possibly even larger than the room had been, Brooke had a hard time imagining filling the house but was already making plans thinking about what room would be good for Sam and which one for Noah, she would need a guest room and perhaps could turn the one with the closet into an office and work room.

Most of all Brooke wanted to create a home for her children, one with room to grow and move in. The smaller house she lived in now was great for a single woman and though Brooke loved it she wanted room for a piano for Noah and space where her and Sam didn't have to fight over whose turn it was to do their work at the dining table.

"I love it, I love it" Brooke exclaimed.

The location was perfect, the house was beautiful and Brooke felt like it could be home. She had another walk through and then made her offer.

-x-

Lucas sat alone in Peyton's office his laptop open in front of him, fingers typing away, he barely noticed the time go by. So, focused on what he was working on Lucas jumped when Haley called his name from the doorway, "I didn't expect to see you here" Haley smiled when he closed the laptop, "what are you doing?"

"Just doing some writing"

"That's great" she walked over to sit across from him, she slouched in the chair, "I didn't know you were writing again"

"When inspiration hits" he shrugged.

Haley thought about it for a moment, she knew Lucas wrote more when he was running away from something or conflicted, instead she asked casually "why aren't you working at home"

"It's quiet here" his eyes flicked away.

Haley's stomach sunk, "I didn't realise Peyton was that loud"

Lucas rubbed the back of his head, "it's… she's stuck on bedrest and sometimes she needs her space, I do too"

"If I didn't know better I would say you are avoiding her" Haley teased though there was an edge of worry to her vice.

"Perhaps I am" Lucas confessed, "I feel stuck, Haley, there's so much I want to do or say but I can't. I feel like anything I do will just make everything ten times worse so I just keep going pretending that everything is okay"

"Peyton and the baby are going to be okay"

"I really hope so" Lucas gave a deep sigh and looked to the ceiling, "it's like my life is in limbo. I should be excited about getting married and having a baby but instead I have this huge question mark over what should be the happiest days of my life. We fight over the baby and we fight over the wedding and every single time I have to remember that I can't stress Peyton so I walk away, I change the subject. I can't bring up anything to do with Brooke or Noah because we can't talk about them either" he gave a sad chuckle, "and I thought the fighting would end when I proposed to Peyton"

"Every couple argues. Peyton is stronger than you think, you shouldn't be so worried to have the tough conversations with her, trust me there will be many more coming"

He shook his head, "I would never forgive myself if something happened to them".

Haley straightened up, "you can't bottle everything inside of you so go for it, I'm here, everything you wish you could say to Peyton but can't at the moment let it out, pretend I'm her"

"I can't" he laughed and sent Haley a strange look.

"I am your best friend, if you can't yell your secrets at me who can you?"

For a moment Lucas didn't speak, he walked over to the window and looked outside, letting out a breath Lucas turned back around not really looking at Haley, he let it out

" _I'm tired, I'm tired of constantly having to prove myself. I'm sick of not being about to just be or do what I want because I have to second guess every decision I make; will it make you angry or sad, or I have to spend thirty minutes explaining something that I shouldn't have to"_ once he began he couldn't stop _"sometimes I don't need to tell everyone everything, sometimes I need to work things out by myself without having everyone trying to tell me how I feel or how I should feel. You want to support me?"_ he imagined Peyton standing in front of him, _"then support me, don't pretend you are angry for me when you are just angry for yourself. God you are such a hypocrite, you lied to me, manipulated me and I'm not even allowed to be angry because of course everything I do is somehow different and worse where as everything you do is for us. But you didn't think of us when I asked you to marry me and you said no, and I'm stuck with these emotions I should have had the chance to deal with years ago except everyone in my life seems to think that they know what's best for me without asking me. And Brooke… I can't deal with how you feel about her or your friendship because I'm still dealing with those things for myself, I loved her, a part of me has always and will always love her, because she is a part of me just like you are but I thought we were friends, I thought she had forgiven me, that we would never work but still I don't know… were some sort of family thing… but now I'm thinking that I never knew her or what she felt. She lied to me and it hurts, it hurts me to think she never trusted me, to think maybe nobody trusts me because I see it in their eyes, the judgement and the doubt. How do you feel, Lucas? I don't know how I feel"_

He took a breath, _"I don't get a moment to myself to really think about it, it's one thing after another. I know I don't want to lose anybody, I know I can't hold onto everybody, I just want to be happy. Every time I feel happy and like my life is finally going in the right direction I'm hit by something new. I thought we could make this all work, I could share Noah with Brooke and I get this chance to be a father to a wonderful little boy and I get to have another baby and build a life with Peyton, and she loves me, but Brooke won't let me in, Noah won't even hug me, and… and I could lose Peyton and the baby. And maybe it's selfish to want it all, maybe it's unrealistic that no one will be hurt but I don't know what to do"_

Lucas blinked, Haley was staring at him waiting, he licked his lips knowing he couldn't say everything he just imagined saying.

"I can't say it, Haley, what good would it do?"

"Maybe it would make you feel better" she went over and hugged Lucas, resting her chin on his shoulder, "there's never a right answer in life"

"You seem to make all the right decisions"

"I've made one or two mistakes along the way"

Lucas squeezed his friend, his voice when it came was barely above a whisper, "I love them both, Haley"

Leaning into Lucas she closed her eyes, "I know" she whispered back and she felt his body shake as her best friend started to cry. Haley had always known that Lucas' heart was conflicted, she had tried to get him to follow his heart and sort out his troubled feelings having seen the love triangle begin to rear its head again. From the moment Lindsey left Tree Hill and Lucas and Brooke had gravitated towards each other like magnets Haley had seen the writing on the walls.

She had told him to choose, Haley hadn't expected her best friend of nearly twenty years to rush into a decision with an engagement plan. Perhaps if Brooke did not have Noah then Brooke and Lucas would have continued to dance around each other, drifting apart and moving on. It was too late to put all the truths away now.

Haley wiped a tear away, she could feel Lucas' pain, as their grip slackened on each other she stepped back and straightened Lucas' shirt, "you love two amazing women and at some point or another they both managed to fall in love with you and give you two precious children who will bring you so much joy over the years to come, and you know what Lucas, no matter what happens they'll always be living proof of your heart" she looked him in the eyes, "some would even say you're very lucky"

Lucas' face was red yet his eyes were now dry though he nodded, "I know what I have to do" he nodded again, "I have to let her go. Brooke deserves to be happy and so does Peyton"

Touching Lucas' cheek Haley smiled, "and so do you".

-x-

The joy in the room was contagious, Brooke happily danced barefoot in the kitchen, a wooden spoon in one hand, sitting on a stool at the counter Sam laughed at her foster mother as she shook her head. The music blared, Brooke didn't care how ridiculous she looked, she swayed her hips and threw her arms around, she danced right over to Sam and forced the teenager off the stool.

Sam was reluctant but eventually she let loose and abruptly started to shimmy, her mouth wide open in a grin, "your turn squirt" Sam grabbed Noah from under his arms and swung him up in the air off his stool.

Dimples on display Noah wiggled but was quickly snatched by Brooke, "new rule, if you are in the kitchen you have to dance"

"A rule is a rule" Sam laughed at Noah, "and I know how you feel about rules"

"Its not a real rule" Noah refused to dance and Brooke placed his feet back on the floor.

Hand on her hip Brooke kinked her brow, "I think it may be the most serious rule of the house"

His brow creased, "what is the point of dancing?"

"Fun" Brooke answered immediately, "and cardio, exercise is very important you know"

"I can't dance"

Sam started to dance goofily, imitating old fashioned over the top moves, "it's easy, you just move!"

Brooke turned the music up even more and grabbed Noah's hand encouraging him to step side to side, Brooke smiled as he followed her moves, she spun him around and to her surprise he cackled. The sound had Sam and Brooke getting more into it, no one noticed the door opening.

"My god, it's a mad house in here" Victoria narrowed her eyes yet inside she smiled at the sight.

Looking up Brooke spotted her mother and quickly stopped the music, the house became silent, "Mother, I didn't expect you"

"Samantha invited me for dinner" Victoria looked around the messy living area, "I also have the samples you wanted to see with me" and she gave an exaggerated wipe of her jacket as if she could feel herself getting filthier by the second, "don't the children clean up after themselves?"

"Relax, it's called fun" Sam rolled her eyes at Victoria.

Brooke laughed and went back to cooking dinner, "actually it is getting late, why don't you two pack away and go wash your hands for dinner"

"What is all this?" Victoria eyed the mess again.

"Noah has a science fair this week, it's the last week of school" Brooke replied and then was amazed as Victoria began to help Sam and Noah clean up. With a smile Brooke begun to hum overhearing Victoria promise Noah that she would be there.

-x-

Bored Peyton rolled over, Haley had told Peyton her bump was tiny however Peyton was used to a flat abdomen and her usually skinny body and felt huge. Never being able to be fully comfortable Peyton once again tried to move her pillows trying to find the best position.

Lucas return was hear before he was seen, Peyton was both excited and nervous never knowing how to feel. Something had changed between the two of them, Peyton didn't say anything but she knew Lucas no longer looked at her in the exact same way. He was nice, Lucas was always nice, yet Peyton wanted more.

Soon Lucas appeared in the door way, he smiled but it didn't reach his eyes, to Peyton's surprise Lucas pulled a bouquet of flowers from behind his back, "hi" he handed her the flowers and then from the other side a bag full of Peyton's favourite sweets, "these are for you".

Peyton smiled, she was warmed by the two actions and smelt the flowers before allowing Lucas to place them in the empty vase by the bed. They kissed, a small lip to lip move, and Lucas asked her if she was hungry.

It was unexpected, pleasant and unexpected though Peyton's smile was slightly sad. Lucas didn't have the same smile he used too, there was little joy in his movements when he handed her the flowers and Peyton could remember the difference between this action and the last time he gave her flowers at the beginning of her pregnancy. It wasn't hard for Peyton to see Lucas' tired red eyes, the shadows that darkened his expression.

Digging deeper into herself Peyton tried to grab onto the happiness, it was there, somewhere, it was just so much slower and harder to reach. The smile dropped, looking at the colourful flowers Peyton sighed instead.

-x-

"Lights out" Brooke smiled from the doorway, Noah quickly placed his bookmark in and stashed the book away, "goodnight sweetie"

"Goodnight, Mom" Noah already had his eyes closed and he missed the pure look of joy that came over Brooke, she switched the light switch and the room became dark in an instant.

The door closed gently behind her as she left, Brooke returned to her mother, "where did Sam go?"

"Some boy named Jack called her and she ran off to her room"

"He's a good kid"

"Hmm, the Scott boy was meant to be as well, that didn't stop me becoming a grandmother far too young"

"Well Mother, you can't choose who your children's friends are"

Victoria smiled, "yes, well, I call that lesson the Peyton Sawyer debacle" but she saw the look Brooke wore and changed the subject, "I like Samantha, motherhood suits you as well, you make it seem easy" she shifted slightly uncomfortable at the admission.

Brooke took the compliment and thanked her mother, as soon as she did Brooke noticed Victoria's bag, in an instant Brooke picked it up already opening it as she spoke, "let's look at the samples" her fingers were on the portfolio but something else caught her attention.

"Let me" Victoria went to snatch her bag back but it was too late, Brooke kept hold of it and quickly pulled out the envelopes addressed to her, "what are these?"

"I can explain" Victoria panic was hidden behind her confidence and sure tone.

Her own name was on each one of the letters, two were in the bag, opened already though Brooke had never seen them, "these are addressed to me"

"They were sent care of the company" Victoria waved her hand, "I didn't want to bother you" she tried to take the letters from Brooke but Brooke turned her back on her mother and started to read one of the letters.

Her stomach dropped, "you had no right to keep these from me, how many have there been?"

"I did it for you! I see how much you love Samantha, this woman threw her away, Samantha is better off a Davis with you" her panic began to show.

A furious Brooke glared at her mother, "haven't you learnt anything! You can't keep making decisions for us, thinking you know best" Brooke clutched the letters to her chest, "these were for me, for Sam, you had no right, no right whatsoever, to hide them from me" her voice was growing louder.

"What is going on?" Sam interrupted from the staircase, her long dark hair out, she was already in her pyjamas, "I can hear you screaming from upstairs"

Not looking at her foster daughter Brooke kept her focus on Victoria, _"get out!_ "

"Brooke"

"Brooke, please"

Both Sam and Victoria said her name at the same time, "I said, get out"

Victoria retrieved her bag and gave a nod, she went to the door before turning back to look at Brooke, "I'm sorry"

"You're always sorry" Brooke replied.

There was a slight tug of Victoria's lips, a sheen to her eyes, she spoke simply, "no, I haven't been, not nearly enough" and she left.

Sam rushed down the stairs, "what the hell was that all about?"

Taking a breath Brooke prepared to talk to Sam, she gently led Sam to the couch, she sat next to Sam, "your birth mother has been writing to the store, she wants to see you"

As soon as Brooke said the words Sam stiffened, her back went straight, "so? Who cares" Sam grabbed the letters from Brooke and raced to the bin, she threw them in only for Brooke to pull them out seconds later.

"I know how hard this is for you but these words belong to you and you may not owe Rebecca anything but you owe it to yourself to get any answers you are seeking, and I am here for you no matter what"

Sam reluctantly took the letters from Brooke, "why should I care about her, she doesn't care about me"

With a tentative touch Brooke brushed Sam's hair behind her ear, "trust me Sam, she cared" _I know._

 **-x-**

 **Thanks for reading. Please review and follow.**

 **I'm sure some hated this chapter, two steps forward one step back. There was no BL, there was Peyton, why won't they just all get together already and love happily ever after. Gah how long will this all take. Things are happening though, and trust me, there's much to look forward over the next few chapters. Lots of bonding! Say it with me…. FAMILY TRIP! With one person left behind in Tree Hill stuck on bedrest mwahahahahahaha.**


	17. Chapter 17

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, and I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting. I do however own may too many coffee mugs for a person who doesn't drink hot drinks.**

 **Firstly I apologise for the late update, it's one of those times I couldn't help it. My son spent a night at his father's so I've dedicated the last 20 hours to this chapter every free second that I could and will do my best to post the next chapter earlier than my two week deadline, perhaps if I get a good response I will kick my own butt to get the next update on here within a week.**

 **I would like to thank everyone for their reviews, thanks to the guests as well as breathbrooklove, salazarjasam, boblina, noah, n'íthoughtiwascrazy, new to brooke, lucasbrooke, lileen, k-pixy, bjq, notrob, diane, clavyus and callison. You guys rock.**

Chapter Seventeen

Glasses covering half her face Brooke stood discretely behind a tree, or that was what she told herself half hidden peeking from behind the trunk.

"Brooke?"

She winced and slowly turned around, "hi, Luke" she tried to look casual but he stared at her oddly.

"Everything okay?"

"Sure, why wouldn't it be" she looked around, "I'm just… taking a walk, it's such a beautiful day"

"Yes, it is" he walked up next to her and looked in the direction she had been staring, "so who are we spying on?"

"Me" she pointed to herself and laughed, "spy? I am just taking in the view" her smile dropped when he raised his brow at her, "fine. I'm watching Sam, she's with her birth mother again and I am just…"

"Watching?" he smiled and then laughed when Brooke pouted and glanced back in Sam's direction.

"She looks happy right but not too happy?"

"Sure" Lucas tilted his head and saw Sam throw her head back and laugh, "the perfect amount of happy"

"I know she's happy with me" Brooke nodded her eyes staying on Sam and Rebecca, Lucas narrowed his eyes as he watched Brooke.

"Sam adores you"

"Of course she does, what's not to adore? It's just she's spending more and more time with Rebecca. I wish I could hate her but she's so damn nice and reminds me so much of Sam"

"Sounds horrible"

Brooke slapped Lucas' chest with the back of her hand, "shut up"

He laughed happy that he could distract Brooke, "where's Noah?"

"With my mother"

"That sounds like a blast" he slowly started walking down the street, his hands going into his pockets, and without even realising it Brooke walked by his side as they talked, "how is Noah feeling about the trip?"

"I have no idea, I can't tell if he's excited or nervous or just… fine with it. I think he's okay, as if performing in front of hundreds of people doesn't bother him at all"

Lucas nodded, "I for one am excited, to see Noah up there-"

"Yeah" Brooke looked back briefly, she sighed and put thoughts of Sam behind her, "he is going to look so cute in his little suit"

For a few metres they didn't talk, they walked in step with each other, both thinking silently. Lucas spoke first, "I talked to Nathan, he is going to pick you guys up first then swing by and grab me"

"I wish they could come too"

Lucas shrugged, "Nathan has training"

"I know" Brooke stopped, "I should probably go to my car and drive back to pick Sam up as if I didn't just park around the corner"

"Right" Lucas chuckled and lifted one hand from his pockets to wave goodbye at Brooke, "I'll see you tomorrow"

"Take care, Luke"

"You too" he stood watching her walk back in the opposite direction, her hair glowing in the sunlight.

Brooke walked straight by the tree he'd found her hiding behind and kept walking, he watched until she turned the corner and then Lucas continued walking down the street. It was a familiar route he took, enjoying the summer morning and when he eventually reached the river court Lucas was greeted by a jumping Jamie and Drey and a smiling Nathan. The brother's shared a one-armed hug and Lucas stole the ball from Jamie, dribbling it down the court before Nathan ran and took it from him.

The younger brother slam dunked the ball and then bounced it back to Lucas, "how you doing?"

"Good. You?"

"Yeah. Peyton?"

"Bored crazy" Lucas scored and stepped back as Nathan caught the basketball before it hit the ground.

Wanting to be involved the boys ran around Nathan and Lucas, giving up the ball Nathan and Lucas walked to the side of the court to take a seat while Jamie and Drey played.

Avoiding his brother's eyes Nathan asked another question, "ready for New York?"

"It's next week"

"Not what I'm talking about. You ready to be going away with Brooke, just the two of you alone, in the same place as five years ago?"

"We won't be alone" Lucas scoffed.

Nathan shook his head, "I don't know man, Hales thinks this is a bad idea. You are meant to be putting space between you and Brooke"

"And I am but I can't avoid everything to do with Noah to avoid being in the same room as Brooke"

"There's a difference between the same room and the same _hotel_ room" Nathan eyed Lucas, "need I remind you of your history with Brooke and hotel rooms"

"I don't know Nate; do you avoid Taylor at all family events?" Lucas threw back.

Not taking the bait Nathan smiled, "the difference is Taylor and I were never in love"

"You want to come be our chaperone, hold our hands, bring a measuring tape and make sure we always have two feet between us?"

"Sorry Luke" Nathan let the conversation end and nodded towards the court and the boys, they both stood and they joined the game. Nathan didn't bring up the trip again.

-x-

Once they were home Brooke felt her phone vibrating, "I have to get this" she walked by Noah, touching his shoulder briefly before escaping to her room and closing the door.

When Brooke ended the call she stared at the wall, her heart thumping, there was a knock and the door opened. Victoria walked in, "is everything alright, darling?"

"You're the last person I want to talk to right now" Brooke didn't look at her mother, she flung her phone onto the bed. _No_.

The door clicked shut though Victoria walked closer to Brooke, "I can tell that you're upset"

"You have avoided being my mother my whole life, don't think you can walk in and start now. For the children's sake I'm allowing you to stay around but if I need a shoulder to cry on there are a million people I will turn to before I even look in your direction" Brooke turned her head to the side, Victoria saw no tears yet Brooke's face was pale and her eyes were glassed over.

"I don't see anyone else here"

Brooke slowly turned around, "that was Carine, I had asked about adopting Sam"

"Well?"

"Rebecca would have to agree to it… and she's already asked to have Sam back" Brooke chocked back the tears, she refused to let one single stray tear drop especially in front of Victoria.

"I see how much you care about that girl and how much she loves you, she loves _you_ not some woman she just met" Victoria reassured Brooke.

The feelings that were inside of Brooke were not those of reassurance, Brooke was nervous and worried, she could see her plans slipping between her fingers.

Brooke knew what she wanted, she was just no longer so sure what Sam wanted anymore.

Victoria tried to comfort Brooke though as soon as the older woman went to touch her Brooke side stepped, shaking her shoulder away from her mother. It was hard for Brooke to feel the touch of her mother when she was upset, to seek the woman's comfort, it was something Brooke had never received when she was younger and it made it that much harder to be vulnerable around Victoria.

Never having seen her mother cry Brooke had often wondered if Victoria was even capable of such emotion.

"It's out of my hands" to the best of her ability Brooke acted strong, she lifted her chin and straightened her shoulders. Inside her heart recoiled, a part of her going over everything she could do and Brooke knew nothing would be clear until she spoke to Sam.

Without blinking Brooke stepped around Victoria and left the room, putting on her smile when she joined the children, willing her face not to betray her.

There was a blush to her face but other than that her emotions were hidden for anyone looking, when she spoke her voice was huskier, "what's everyone's plans?"

"Is it alright if Jack comes over?" Sam's eyes were hopeful and Brooke nodded.

"Sure, keep your door open though"

"Yeah, yeah" Sam rolled her eyes and quickly ran upstairs, Brooke turned to Noah and kinked her brow in question.

"I was planning on doing some reading" at the words Brooke's face slightly fell and Noah licked his lips, looking into his mother's eyes the boy added on "or you could help me with my stars?"

Brooke's face lit up, "I would love to help" she paused for a moment, "what stars are we talking about?"

Victoria watched, worry etched on her face, "Brooke-"

"Thanks for staying with Noah, we're good here now" Brooke interrupted cutting her mother's words off.

With a nod Victoria farewelled them promising to see her tomorrow, with Victoria gone Brooke turned her attention to Noah "where were we?"

"My stars" Noah answered, slowly walking to his bedroom with expectation that Brooke would follow, she did so and entered the boy's room to see Noah looking up at his roof where Brooke had randomly placed all the glow in the dark stars.

Noah shook his head, his lips puckered in thought, "it's all wrong".

-x-

It was late in the afternoon when Lucas returned home, his hands full, he was surprised to see Peyton standing in the kitchen, "hi" she smiled at him.

"You okay?" he asked, placing his bags down. Both their eyes gave away the tell-tale signs of lack of sleep.

Peyton shrugged, "I'm fine. You didn't need to send Skills to babysit me" she sent him a sharp look and Lucas held her gaze.

Not replying Lucas instead eventually picked his bags up and started walking towards the nursery, Peyton began to follow, "you went shopping?"

"Yeah"

"What did you buy for the baby?"

Lucas closed his eyes knowing Peyton couldn't see him, he walked into the bedroom and placed the bags down, "I wasn't shopping for the baby. Noah's birthday is coming up, we've started to get supplies for his party and I got him a few gifts"

"Oh" Peyton eyed the bags and boxes, "what did we get him?"

"I saw a telescope, I thought he would like that" Lucas turned to face Peyton, "I did have a look at a few things though… for the baby, I tried a few prams that you said you liked and checked out car seats, added things to our list" he shrugged.

Peyton looked away from him, her arms folded, she glanced around the unfinished nursery, "you need to clean the nursery, finish the furniture" and she turned around to leave.

With a sigh Lucas moved all the things for Noah to one side and decided that he had no better time than now to do as Peyton said.

-x-

It was weighing on Brooke's mind all afternoon, when Jack's foster father came and collected him Brooke waited ten minutes before going up to see Sam.

The teenager was sitting at her desk, her back to the door, her eyes focused on something in her hand, "hey what you got there?" Brooke asked from the doorway, Sam tuned her head to smile at Brooke and the older woman walked in to join Sam.

Placing the photo down Sam's voice was different to usual "my… uh… Rebecca gave it to me, it's her house" she gave a lopsided smile, "I always wanted a white picket fence"

Brooke rested her cheek against the top of Sam's soft head, "we can have a picket fence if you want one" Brooke whispered, "anything you want you just have to ask"

"I know" Sam's eyes were still on the photo.

Something inside Brooke flipped over, "you're happy hear right?"

Sam frantically turned around, wide eyes looked at Brooke, "of course… I…. I love it here, you've done so much for me, you've done everything" and she hugged Brooke.

Brooke gently pulled away, her hands still on Sam, "are things going… good with Rebecca?"

"Yeah" Sam nodded, "is that okay?"

"Of course, it is" it hurt Brooke to say it but it was true, she smiled "as long as you're happy. I worry about you that's all" she lifted Sam's hair and brushed it away from the girl's face, "never be worried about telling me how you feel though"

"She was just my age when she gave me up, you know, she didn't want to but her parents made her do it" there was a sheen in Sam's eyes.

Brooke nodded, she thought back to when she was seventeen and seven months pregnant crying in a strange bed as her parents argued about her in the other room, and then she thought about the feeling in her heart when she was able to hold Noah for the first time over six years after the day she thought she was saying goodbye.

"Whenever you want to see her you can, we can figure something out"

"You won't hate me if I want to see my real mom?"

Brooke was taken aback, not just that Sam was worried about how Brooke would feel about her but at Sam calling Rebecca her real mom. In that moment Brooke knew that no piece of paper would ever make her Sam's mom.

She smiled, "I will never, could never, hate you. I love you, Sam, and no matter what happens you will always be a part of this family" Brooke carefully picked up the photo of Rebecca's house, "no matter where you call home"

"This is home" Sam told Brooke but there was a crack in her voice, her eyes strayed to the photo.

Brooke went to sit on Sam's bed and patted the spot next to her, Sam obediently walked over and sat next to Brooke.

"A part of me wants to hate Rebecca and hold you tight and never let you go, to scream that she let you go, but I can't hate her" Brooke touched Sam's hair with a smile, "because she's a part of you and in a way she's part of me. I've been her."

Sam licked her lips and Brooke continued, "I want you to know that I love you and I want to be your mother, I talked to Carine about officially adopting you. You will always have a home under my roof for as long as you live but more than anything I just want you to be as happy as you can be, safe and loved. And if you need to find your home elsewhere then I'll support you and I'll let you go to it with a smile and I'll be here whenever you need me, for however long you do"

"Why are you so good to me?"

"Because I love you. Whatever you choose, nothing will change that" inside her heart was breaking but there was also a calmness, a knowing that she was doing what was best for her child because no matter what Sam chose the girl would always be one of Brooke's children.

-x-

At ten in the morning Lucas arrived at Brooke's, the engine was still running when Brooke's front door opened and Noah came running down the steps.

Brooke waited by the door, watching their son until he was at the car, Lucas stepped out and opened the door for Noah turning back to Brooke to wave as he hopped back in the driver's seat. Noah waved to his mother as they back up and Lucas gave a honk of his horn before driving off, Brooke stood for a moment before going back inside.

Eyes back focused on the road Lucas addressed Noah with a smile in his tone, "do you still want to go to the library today?"

"Yes, please."

During the holidays Lucas and Brooke had found that Noah got exhausted from all the back and forth between his parents, they had quickly decided that during the week Lucas would spend a few hours with Noah every second day but it was usually no more than four hours, so the boy had down time at home to do as he pleased, usually spending the time to himself in his room, yet still spent time with his father.

Once a week Lucas would take Noah to the library, another day they went for a nature walk, one day Noah got to choose whatever he wanted to do with Lucas and on the weekends when Lucas had Noah for the whole day Lucas usually spent the morning playing various board games or video games at home with Noah and after lunch they would go visit Nathan and Haley where Noah would practice on the piano and swim, later they'd go together to the river court and have dinner before the sun set and Lucas would take Noah home to Brooke.

Noah appreciated the quiet times with his father and the comfortable walks they took. At first he had found his father very emotional and overwhelming though as the weeks had turned to months Lucas' expectations had dropped and Noah found his father very calm and relaxing. Lucas didn't mind the time they spent together if Noah was silent or thinking and the boy discovered when they did talk his father was a good listener and always gave thoughtful responses.

The library was one of Noah's favourite places, he liked how quiet and peaceful it was, Lucas always took his time finding a book as well and Noah never felt rushed. He could spend a whole day going through the books, getting lost in the information and the smell of the pages.

There was small table with two chairs under the window that Noah loved the best, it was always warm and away from the busier section of the library. Lucas would even leave Noah alone sometimes for ten minutes as he went looking for books, safe in the knowledge he would find Noah still at the same table.

The two of them sat at the table, each with a book, Noah sent a small smile to his father as they sat opposite each other, their movements oddly similar as they opened their books. Lucas smiled back, he loved Noah's smile, not just because it reminded Lucas of Brooke but because every smile Noah gave no matter how slight showed how far Noah had come.

The six-year-old was making attachments, he was not only growing comfortable with other people it seemed to Lucas that Noah was growing more comfortable in himself.

Lucas checked what book Noah was reading and noticed it was an astrology book, he smiled inside his mind and flipped through his baby name book.

Five minutes later Noah's nose lifted as he tried to look at Lucas' book, "baby names" Lucas told Noah, "any ideas?"

"Ariadne" Noah was quick to say, Lucas laughed thinking about Noah's research into Greek mythology, and then Noah added on "or Henry"

The differences between the names had Lucas curious, "why those names?"

"I like the sound of them" Noah shrugged.

"Me too"

They both smiled again and Noah went back to his book. Lucas stopped looking at names and watched Noah, it was the little things that amazed Lucas.

-x-

As soon as Carine left the house Brooke wrapped an arm around Sam, despite how inside a hole was slowly widening inside her, Brooke's thoughts were on how Sam was coping with everything. Carine had been supportive, it wasn't as easy as Rebecca asking to have Sam and Brooke knew that with everything she went through to get Noah back. Carine had been positive, Rebecca was ticking all the right boxes.

"How are you feeling?"

"I don't know" Sam's big brown eyes looked shocked, "excited, nervous… scared" she shook her head, "what if this doesn't work, what if I move in with her and she is like a crazy cat lady or something?"

"Does she… talk about cats?" Brooke asked slowly, her brows narrowing.

Sam sucked her bottom lip into her mouth, "well, no" and they both rolled their eyes. Brooke hugged Sam to her side, Sam leant against her foster mother once again feeling so torn, "what if she hates me"

"That's impossible" Brooke quickly kissed Sam, "but FYI, you might want to try to avoid stealing her ID or throwing parties at her workplace or trashing her stuff-"

With a huff Sam sent Brooke a glare, "I get it"

"She is going to _love_ you and every… well _nearly_ every minute she spends with you" and she hugged Sam tighter to her side.

Every minute she had left with Sam was a moment Brooke was going to treasure, neither knew yet when that last moment would be.

The deepest part of Brooke secretly hoped that Sam would choose to return to her, it was a selfish desire and Brooke was well aware of it, the rest of her wanted Sam to be as happy as she could be and Brooke also felt for Rebecca. Second chances weren't offered to everyone, they were both two mothers able to have a second chance with the child they let go of.

Half an hour later Brooke was making the two of them a coffee when there was a knock on the door, Brooke checked the time wondering if Lucas was already back with Noah but there was still at least an hour before she expected them.

Sam was the one who answered the door, she opened it with a barely there smile and then her smile dropped further. Not knowing what to say Sam stayed silent, Brooke saw the teenager freeze and quickly went to check on her.

As the space in front f the teen came into view Brooke tensed herself, she sent Sam a look and Sam nodded as she left to go upstairs to leave Brooke alone with her guest.

"Hi" Brooke kept a hand on the door ready to close it, "what are you doing here?"

"I need to talk to you" Peyton didn't outwardly appear nervous however Brooke knew Peyton well enough that she could recognise the tell-tale signs. What Brooke didn't see in Peyton was any anger, something had changed in Peyton.

Still with a sigh Brooke stepped slightly behind her door, placing a barrier between them, "I don't have time for-"

"I'm sorry I called you a lying slut, you're not a lying slut" her tone was contrite but Brooke smiled at the words.

Opening the door wide Brooke stepped away, "come in" and Peyton walked into the house that not long ago she had called home, Brooke followed Peyton into the living space, "shouldn't you be at home, resting in bed"

Peyton turned around, "yes but I didn't think you would be willing to come visit me" and she sat down on the couch behind her.

Despite Peyton's change of attitude Brooke sat as far away from Peyton as she could, resting against the arm of the lounge chair instead of sitting comfortably, she crossed her legs, her hand placed on he knees. It was a defensive stance and Peyton kept her eyes on Brooke's face.

"I owe you an apology. Forced bedrest has given me a lot of time to think over everything and I admit I handled things… badly" Peyton tried to smile, it shook, faltering before she could truly smile "for a moment there I looked at you and saw my enemy, I lost sight of my best friend"

"I didn't mean for you to get hurt"

"I know. You were thinking about Noah, nobody else" Peyton shook her head, "it all felt so unreal and I didn't do right by Lucas or Noah, or even you"

"I'm sorry too" Brooke blinked, she unfolded her legs, "I did lie. I lied for six years to everybody, I thought I was doing the right thing but I should have told Lucas the truth when I was pregnant" she paused, "I will have to live with my choices for the rest of my life"

"I can't blame you for that" Peyton frowned, "you don't need to say sorry to me and it shouldn't have taken this long for me to say sorry to you. I am, Brooke, I am sorry for everything, you know I never meant to hurt you either?"

"I know" Brooke nodded but there was a part of her that wasn't so sure. Brooke wanted her friend back despite the rollercoaster the friendship often was, despite the lows Peyton was family and a part of the highs as much as the lows.

Suddenly Peyton started crying, Brooke knew the Peyton who knocked on her door was different, her body didn't stand as tall, her voice weak and afraid, and the tears unashamedly falling down her cheeks were different to any tears Brooke had seen Peyton shed before. The closest thing this Peyton reminded Brooke of was the little blonde girl when she had buried her mother.

"I really need my best friend right now" she sobbed through the words and Brooke closed the distance between them, sitting next to Peyton she pulled the other woman into a hug holding her not so differently to the way she had hugged Sam earlier.

Brooke embraced and comforted Peyton, she listened to her friend, but despite the apology, despite how sincere Peyton appeared, or the circumstances her friend was in, something was different. Something had changed between them. Despite how close Peyton was physically there was something inside Brooke that kept an unseen distance between them, a thin wall that prevented the curly haired blonde all the way back in.

Peyton eventually left and though on the surface it appeared a bridge had been built between them Brooke felt a gaping chasm between what they use to be and what was left of their relationship. Coming from upstairs Sam reappeared, "you okay?"

"I'm fine" Brooke's tone was deadpan.

Sam grimaced, "I'm fine usually means someone isn't fine"

"I'm fi- everything's okay, crisis averted" Brooke didn't meet Sam's eyes and the teen went to the kitchen to grab their abandoned coffees. They were cold and without saying a word Sam emptied them down the sink and remade a hot drink for both of them.

The teen handed Brooke her drink and offered her advice with it, "just because she suddenly wants to be friends again doesn't mean you have to do it"

"It's Peyton"

Sam kinked her brow as if to say _so?_ And Brooke wondered if Victoria's dislike of Peyton had rubbed off on the girl, "let's just focus on the two of us right now, let's go shopping before Noah comes home? We can find something for New York" Brooke clapped her hands together excited at the thought and Sam reluctantly agreed. Brooke was grateful, she wanted her focus to be on her children and to put all the drama and confusion behind her.

-x-

 **Road trip next chapter!**


	18. Secrets

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, and I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting. I do however own a canvas picture of BL I drew when I was younger and is currently hung in my spare room.**

 **I gotta make this quick but I owe you an explanation and warning. I a so frustrated and angry at the moment over this, my charger has stopped working properly which has made it very hard to use my laptop lately. This is really pissing me off because it's a relatively new laptop barely half a year old and I have already had to send it away once to fix it and one of the previous problems was the original charger broke. I don't know what the f the issue is this time but it only charges if it's a certain way which means I have to pretty much hold it in if I can find that right position and mostly do everything one handed. Grr. I have tried really hard to get this out today and I hope you understand I have to be wise with how I use my laptop until the new charger arrives. Luckily my son was at his dad's today for father's day so I was able to keep the laptop charged for a decent amount of time without distraction. This means though I'm not sure how next chapter will go and how long it will take me to write it and post it. I apologise in advance and thank you all for reading, reviewing and being patient. Until next time, take care and enjoy**

Chapter Eighteen

The flight to New York was uneventful, Sam had taken full advantage of flying first class and Noah had listened to a podcast during the flight. Brooke was well aware of Lucas sitting behind her and could hear the clicking of his keyboard as he wrote during the flight, following his example Brooke made notes of some ideas for her next line.

Together they looked like a family, the four of them walking side by side through the airport, Victoria had organised a driver and Lucas was stiff compared to the others as he followed the older man in his black cap towards the limo.

It was another reminder for Lucas how out of his league Brooke Davis and her world is to him, until Noah came into the picture Lucas had always expected Brooke to leave Tree Hill again sure that the small town would not satisfy her. A part of Lucas feared that Brooke's time in Tree Hill was still counting down but this time he had the extra worry that she would be taking his son with her.

They left the airport quickly, Lucas had expected to stay at a hotel as Brooke's former apartment was leased out, however once again Victoria had stepped in and offered the use of an executive apartment in the same building as hers that was owned by 'Clothes over bros' and often used by the business. To be specific Victoria had offered it to Lucas and the use of her own apartment for Brooke and the children, Brooke had denied it not wanting to separate Lucas from Noah during the trip and unwilling to divide them into two groups. Their hotel rooms were cancelled and they'd agreed to stay in the four-bedroom apartment instead.

It was sleek and modern, far from Lucas' style though Sam was impressed and promptly chose to stay in master suite which was the most lavish of the rooms with the best view.

Lucas was happy to allow the teen the best room and knew Brooke would happily do anything for Sam this weekend, Noah was quick to pick the room which would have the best view of the sun set. The two adults stood with their bags outside the two remaining bedrooms, one next to the other. Without saying a word Lucas motioned for Brooke to pick a room and she peeked into both before choosing the one which had the artwork on the walls.

After freshening up they met in the kitchen, Sam already cupped a mug of steaming hot coffee, Brooke had taken off her shoes and sat at one of the benches next to Noah who was going over his schedule.

"I think I could just lock myself in here all weekend" Sam sighed dreamily in answer to hearing Noah's busier schedule.

"I have scheduled a meeting today while I am here, I was thinking you could come with me" Brooke looked at Sam but the teenager grimaced, "or you could stay here and enjoy the apartment" Brooke smiled and was rewarded by a smirk from Sam.

"Now you're speaking my language"

They had an hour before they had to leave, Brooke gave Sam strict instructions to stay within the building and gave her the key card for the common areas, and then the two parents left with Noah.

At the concert hall Brooke and Lucas stayed close to Noah, with a hand placed gently on Noah's shoulder Lucas protected Noah guiding him through. They were greeted by a group of Noah's teachers, they were the first to arrive except for a few children who were in the care of the school for the trip who had come with the teachers.

A boy who looked closer to ten quickly joined them, Noah introduced him as Kabir. The older boy was lean with features as sharp as his large almost black eyes, he wore a smile that spoke of not only intelligence but Brooke got the impression he was an adventurer, though polite Kabir quickly stole Noah away. Brooke blew her son a kiss as she bid him farewell, she turned to Lucas and without thinking in a move as natural as getting up in the morning Brooke placed her hand on Lucas' shoulder.

"I better head off now, I will contact you when I am on my way back" and then with a smile on her face Brooke turned to the teachers with a dazzling smile, her warm hand still touching Lucas, "my apologies, I have a board meeting I must attend. It was lovely to see you all again"

Her hand left him and Lucas looked at the spot where her warmth had been only moments ago, his skin tingled long after Brooke's hand disappeared.

-x-

Lucas had been surprised and disappointed when the parents had all been banned from the rehearsal, alone he headed down the street trying to find something to do with his time. Eventually Lucas found himself in Central Park, it still amazed him how large it was, how you could almost forget you're in the city.

His phone beeped, Lucas checked the message and instead of replying he decided to call Brooke, she picked up almost straight away, "hi, Luke. I'm not far away"

"About that. They kind of kicked all the parents out, I'm just taking a walk in the park to waste time"

"Oh" and then a moment later, "I'll meet you there"

Fifteen minutes went by before Brooke texted asking where Lucas was, he took a selfie with a clear view of his surroundings and sent it to Brooke before finding a sunny spot and kicking his shoes off to lay on the ground.

Brooke spotted Lucas, recognising his form from a distance, she slipped her heels off and carrying them in one hand walked over to Lucas, "you look relaxed"

He opened one eye and grinned at her, "I am" then he patted the spot beside him. With as much grace as she could in her tight skirt Brooke joined Lucas, using her bag as a pillow for her head.

A sigh escaped her, "it's such a beautiful day"

"What would you like to do with it?"

Brooked turned her head to the side, she looked at Lucas "this is pretty nice" and a slow smile took over her face. Unable to resist Lucas smiled back.

Their minds went back years to the last time they were in New York together, a time they dreamt about a hypothetical future that sounded too good to be true, neither one said it. Neither one could.

"Do you miss it?"

"Miss what?" Brooke asked.

"This" his eyes roamed around where they were, "all of it. New York, the fashion shows and red carpets?"

With her back flat on the ground Brooke shrugged, her eyes lifting to the sky, "not really, some things sure I miss now but when I was living it all I did was miss home. It was constant, like an ache in my heart, missing all the lights and glamour feels so small in comparison" a bigger smile crossed her face, "the real things I miss about New York are the small things"

"Like what?"

"Like the buskers on the subway-"

Lucas laughed, "you took the subway?"

She frowned, "yes I did, on occasion. I use to go running and I'd catch the subway home" she smiled again, "you don't get that in Tree Hill, there is so much talent here"

"Okay let's do it" Lucas stood up and held out his hand to her, "come on Brooke Davis, show me your New York"

After a moment of hesitation Brooke accepted his help up and they began to walk together, there steps lazy, they carried their shoes dangling in their hands and walked along the grass. They chatted as they walked, their bodies occasionally brushing against each other.

"-and then the paparazzi punched him" Brooke laughed.

Lucas shook his head, "why would you date a guy like that"

Brooke shrugged one shoulder, "I didn't, not really. I was always so busy that even dating was a business deal, all publicity, if I had a red carpet my people would call their people. I had a list of all the Nicks"

"Like the basketball team?"

Her head flung back showing the smooth length of her throat, Lucas rubbed the back of his neck and they changed the subject. Reaching the end of the grass Brooke used Lucas' shoulder to steady herself as she slipped her heels back on, putting the second one on she lost balance and Brooke felt herself fall against Lucas.

A hand flashed up and caught her, Brooke regained her footing, her eyes connecting with Lucas'. For a moment Brooke swore Lucas' eyes were bluer than they use to be, then she blinked and stepped back, "thanks"

Without saying anything they subconsciously started walking further apart from each other, Brooke snuck a look at Lucas, "are you hungry?"

"Famished"

"Okay, Luke, follow me" she winked and turned right.

Brooke took Lucas to a trendy café, with exposed brick walls, vertical gardens and an industrial vibe. It was fast paced, loud, Brooke took in the scent and walked through the crowd with Lucas following her to take a seat at the back. Once Lucas had a seat Brooke disappeared to order and then came back, "I use to come here when I wanted a little bit of home"

Lucas gave a look around not understanding, "this is nothing like home"

Her eyes sparkled and she gave a closed lip smile that spoke of secrets, her cheeks dimpling. It wasn't long before two plates arrived and Brooke waited, she watched with a look of anticipation on her face. After a moment Lucas picked up his fork and took a bite, his own eyes widening.

"It tastes just the same"

"As your mum's" Brooke grabbed her own fork, "this was my guilty pleasure"

"Just like home" he took another bite, with each taste he was reminded of another place and another time.

-x-

They had been to Brooke's favourite coffee joint, to her favourite boutiques where Lucas was forced to carry the bags and talked into buying a new suit, Brooke had shared her favourite view in New York and her favourite bar and this time Lucas talked Brooke into a drink.

The limo driver was confused when he was asked to drop them off at the subway and to wait for them, and now they stood against the pillars listening the two teenagers. When they listened to two songs Brooke dropped a note into the open guitar case and Luca coped the action. They moved further along to the next musician and then the next, Lucas enjoyed it even ore than Brooke.

"This is easy. You know me, I don't remember who sings what, here I can just enjoy the music for what it is, get lost in the crowd" she threw money into the hat of a teenage girl.

The teenager reminded Brooke of Sam, "I should check in on Sam" she stepped away to find a quiet corner. Lucas stayed close but gave Brooke privacy, he did his best to avoid staring at her and Lucas aimlessly looked around.

A few minutes later Brooke reappeared next to Lucas, "she's in the spa" her eyes were still on her phone.

Lucas gave a slow lick of his lips, he could see the emotions being held in by Brooke. There was so much want coming from her Lucas could feel it, "go join her. I'll pick up Noah, just relax with Sam. If she wants to stay in enjoy that"

"You don't mind?"

"Of course. Noah isn't missing out either, don't worry about us"

Brooked nodded, "thanks Luke".

Five minutes later they were on their way back to the apartment building, Lucas got out first and ran around to open Brooke's door, "I'll come back up and grab my laptop" he explained as he helped her out and followed her. Through the door he gently hovered his hand behind her to let her go first, Brooke smiled up at him in thanks and quickly headed for the elevator.

It wasn't long before Lucas had left again and Brooke in her bikini and towel went to find Sam. The teen showed a brief moment of surprise before she smiled and patted the spot next to her.

-x-

Lucas arrived back at the apartment with Noah, he listened to his son discuss rehearsal but his eyes were drawn up towards Brooke and Sam who were laughing by the window, "hi, how was practice?" Sam asked Noah when she spotted their return.

In a run Noah joined the others, "it was fantastic!"

With a bright smile on her face Brooke lit up at Noah, "that's great. How about you and your father go freshen up and get dressed? I made reservations for dinner and you can tell us all about it and we can plan what to do tomorrow"

Noah held in his excitement but Lucas knew he was close to jumping on the spot, "I know! We can go to the Museum of Natural History"

"We are in New York and you are still geeking out" Sam groaned.

Brooke chuckled, "actually it's a must go if you're here, besides I have something else lined up for you tomorrow as well"

"F _ine_ " Sam unfolded her legs, "seems I am outnumbered. Well, I'm going to go get fabulous"

Stopping behind Noah, placing his hands gently on the boy's shoulders, Lucas glanced at Brooke, "how dressed up is dressed up?"

Biting her bottom lip Brooke kinked her brow and Lucas sighed, her let go of Noah, "would you like to pick?"

"If you're asking" she rolled her eyes and nudged Lucas on the way to his room. It wasn't long before Brooke had Lucas' clothes spread across the bed, she had chosen his most expensive suit that he had packed and put it aside for Noah's concert and then narrowed down her selection to one jacket and trousers in black and two shirts.

A shirt in each hand Brooke placed them against Lucas and in the end chose the maroon one, a colour she had always like on Lucas.

"This brings back memories" Lucas mumbled quietly.

Ignoring the comment Brooke packed away his things, slowly folding his last shirt to hold off turning back to face Lucas, "thanks, Brooke. Where are we going tonight anyway?"

"Archibald's on Madison" Brooke finally looked over her shoulder, "you usually have to book months in advance however Quarisha, one of our photographers, is married to one of the owners" she was already on her way out of the room, "so be on your best behaviour" her hand rested on the doorframe for a moment, their eyes met and Brooke left the room.

Lucas picked up the tie Brooke had vetoed that had fallen to the ground, he chuckled and dropped it over the side table.

After his shower Lucas dressed, leaving his jacket behind Lucas went to find Noah. The small boy was in his socks, his black trousers and shirt neatly on, not a hair out of place, "Mom picked my suit" Noah said, his eyes not leaving his reflection.

"You look very handsome" Lucas came further into the room and knelt by Noah, "here let me help"

Noah in the middle of placing his tie around his neck replied offhandedly, "I know how"

Lucas smiled, "a Father should do his son's tie for him at least once"

Fingers pausing Noah turned to face Lucas, he let go of the tie and lifted his chin, Lucas swiftly picked up where Noah had left off "done"

"We match"

"That we do" Lucas smoothed down Noah's black dress shirt, the boy's tie was the same colour as Lucas' shirt and when he stepped away Noah slipped on the matching maroon jacket. Then Noah put on his shoes and together father and son left the room.

They stepped into the living area, Brooke and Sam stood, both faced them as they entered and Lucas' breath caught in his throat, "wow" he eventually managed, "you both look stunning"

Brooke's lashes fluttered but the small smile she gave was focused on her son, Sam on the other hand beamed at Lucas and sashayed in her crimson halter dress, it flowed to her knees and glided with her making her look both more childish than usual yet at the same time highlighting she was a young beautiful woman.

Where as Sam's dress was soft and whimsical, Brooke's black dress clung tightly to her curves and showed more of her thighs than she usually displayed in Tree Hill, the heels seemed impossible to walk in to Lucas yet Brooke moved gracefully in them. Her hair was up, Lucas was used to Brooke's hair out but he admired the bun and how it exposed her neck, he started to think about the slope of her neck and Lucas realised he needed to stop.

Ripping his eyes away from Brooke he complimented Sam again and offered his arm to escort her out, while Noah went to his mother.

A voice from his past haunted Lucas, a night long ago under the same New York skies. _We're going to be a power couple. He's going to be a famous novelist and I'm gonna have a fabulous fashion line._

 _But we're still going to have time to have a big family._

 _Two boys and a girl…_

Brooke's voice from the past faded away and Lucas' mind wandered down a dark path of what if before he reigned himself back to the present. He was looking at a lovely picture; a beautiful woman with a show stopping smile who could send shivers down his spine, and two charming children, yet it wasn't reality. Not his anyway. Lucas' smile dropped for a second.

It was hours before they all returned, their spirits high. For one-night Lucas had lived a forbidden dream of make believe and it had been easy, together the four of them had effortlessly flowed and Lucas realised that just acting like a friend with Brooke felt like enough, enough to feel like more. Perhaps it was dangerous but it made Lucas' charade easy and without their friends and families watching and judging Lucas could be as natural as he wanted safe with Brooke and the kids to just be themselves.

Brooke wasn't reserved or shy, she laughed when she wanted to laugh and smiled when she wanted to smile, there were no whispers or pretending they had no past. Lucas hadn't quite realised how much they had been holding back in Tree Hill yet he knew at the same time how important it was.

One night, a weekend at most, innocent togetherness that hurt no one, Lucas told himself.

The others were tired, Sam yawned as they waited in the elevator to return to the apartment, her head resting against Brooke who had already ditched her heels and undone her hair. Noah had fallen asleep in the limo and Lucas carried his warm, snoring body in his arms. In sleep Noah cradled Lucas I"n a way he never did while awake and the father basked in it.

They were soon back in the apartment, "straight to bed, missy" Brooke playfully pushed a yawning Sam towards her room and then her eyes met Lucas, "you okay with Noah?"

"I've got him" Lucas changed his hold on Noah, "tonight was great, thanks Brooke"

"It was for the kids" Brooke's tone changed and Lucas her defences go up, "I'm going to head to bed, night Luke" and she disappeared to the safety of her own room locking the door behind her.

-x-

"Okay" Sam shrugged, "it's not as lame as I thought" she relented as the walked through the Wallace Wing and the teenager watched an animated Noah go from exhibit to exhibit, "besides the kid is happy"

"Yeah" Brooke bumped hips with Sam. They were nearly finished at the museum and Noah had clearly enjoyed their morning at the museum, Lucas stayed close to Noah's side, turning away from Lucas and Noah in front of them Brooke focused on Sam, "I want you to be happy as well"

"I am" Sam nodded, her hand reached for Brooke's, "I am."

It was 3pm before they left for a late lunch at Shake Shack, Lucas and Noah took the chauffeured limo to head back to the apartment before Noah had to go to rehearsals again. This was Brooke's chance to focus on Sam, "where are we?" the girl asked after they exited the taxi.

"My surprise" Brooke clapped her hands together, they walked through the glass revolving doors and almost immediately a voice called Brooke.

"Miss Davis?" the man held out his hand and Brooke briefly shook it before he turned to Brooke, "and this must be Samantha. Hi, it's nice to meet you both. I'm Gregory and welcome to Strauss Publishing"

Gregory motioned for them to follow him, while Sam looked around curiously, Gregory started giving them the history of the publishing firm, they were in the elevator when he started listing some of the authors they work with. The elevator dinged when they arrived at the right floor "and of course, Lucas Scott" he finished and stepped out.

Eventually they stopped at a door, "we also publish the 'House of Abernethy' series, do you know it?"

"Hell yeah, I love it. Robyn Stiles is my favourite author" Sam's mouth fell open, "that is so cool"

Behind her foster daughter Brooke gave a secret smile, she watched Sam's posture as Gregory to opened the door, "would you like to meet her?"

"What?"

"Would you like to meet her?" he repeated.

She placed a hand on Sam's shoulder and with a grin Brooke whispered, "surprise"

"No you didn't!" Sam screamed before doing her best to compose herself, it didn't last and she gave another squeal and hugged Brooke before calming herself and followed the editor inside.

With so little time with Sam left Brooke wanted to make sure she could at least help one of Sam's dreams come true.

-x-

The pizza was spread out around them, all four in their pyjamas. Lucas spread out on the floor his legs straight, leaning up on elbows, across from him Brooke laid on her stomach as well but her legs were bent, feet dangling in the air. Between them on one side Sam laid on her side, on the other side Noah sat cross legged with his chin in one hand.

"Maybe we shouldn't be playing poker" Lucas' brow dropped.

Sam scoffed, "you're just saying that because you suck at it" she suddenly turned to Brooke, "what, you're not going to tell me off for saying he sucks?"

With a laugh Brooke collected her winnings, "but it's _so_ true"

"You're not very good at this" Noah added on and Lucas dropped his cards in defeat and the others laughed except for Noah who collected all the cards up.

"How about a game of go fish?" Lucas recommended.

Sam groaned but soon agreed and shuffled the cards Noah handed her, "winner picks next game"

Much to everyone else's amusement Lucas still lost, Sam won the game "ever heard of spoons?" she asked and already started dealing the cards and instructed Noah to retrieve three spoons from the kitchen.

Sam looked up, looking between Lucas and Brooke through her lashes, "thanks for today, both of you. This has been one of _the_ best days of my life"

"You don't need to thank me, it's all Brooke"

"You helped" both girls replied to Lucas' denial.

He gave a nod, "you're welcome"

Noah returned and dropped the spoon on the floor, he grabbed the nearly cold pizza and sat back down patiently waiting.

Sam went over the game's rules, like Lucas she found it too easy to pretend for this one weekend that she was a part of the family but at the same time she was aware that she never would be. Not anymore.

Later that night Sam laid in Brooke's bed, her eyes looking up at the ceiling "I get it now"

"Get what?" Brooke asked from the bathroom where she stood at the mirror applying her face cream, her silk nightie swished as she finished and started to walk towards Sam, "what are you on about?"

Sam rolled over, on her side she perched up on one elbow, "Lucas. You and Lucas, at first I was like _what? Why?_ And I read the book but it was still weird but I get it now"

"There's nothing to get" Brooke rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm just saying it makes sense why you two were together-"

Slipping into the bed Brooke tried to ignore Sam, she interrupted her "there's more reasons why we didn't work" her tone was knowing.

Staying silent Sam watched Brooke, despite what the older brunette had said Sam had never seen Brooke look the way she did when she was with Lucas. Not that long-ago Sam wanted Brooke to try with Julian but she had never seen Brooke look at Julian like she looked at Lucas, her whole face changed.

"Come here" Brooke changed the subject and Sam wiggled up to rest her head next to Brooke on the pillows. They were so close their arms brushed against each other, their heads almost touching, Brooke sighed and took in the moment.

A few seconds went by before Sam spoke again, "why did you leave New York?"

Brooke smiled, "as much as I loved it here this was never home".

-x-

Late the next afternoon Sam walked between Lucas and Brooke as they were shown to their seats, the teenager felt out of place in her long cocktail dress and couldn't help but notice Lucas kept touching his bow tie. Inside Sam chuckled, however, nervous Sam reached for Brooke's hand and held on tightly even after they found their seats

They talked quietly until the lights above them dimmed, the curtain opened, it was another half an hour before Noah and his peers performed. Brooke gave an excited squeal, her hand squeezed Sam's but her eyes looked at Lucas briefly her smile widened as their gaze met before they both turned their attention back to Noah.

There was a pride that filled Brooke as she watched and listened, Noah was so confident and sure with each stroke of a key. Later Noah returned to the stage alone, the stage made him appear small as he did his solo, when he finished the audience stood as they applauded but no one clapped harder or louder than his family watching.

Afterwards, they met Noah and praised him, Sam gave him a high five, Lucas a side hug and pat on the shoulder and Brooke kissed the top of her son's head, she sniffed his hair as she did so, "you were brilliant"

"Thank you"

"Not bad, Kid" Sam smiled.

Noah smiled back and then started discussing some of the other musicians who had performed, the more he talked the faster he spoke.

A young soft voice broke through the crowd calling Noah's name, a girl slightly older and barely taller than Noah appeared dressed in an elegant black dress with a white bow. Her silky black hair was neatly braided, coffee coloured skin with freckles spread across her face, she smiled widely at Noah, "are you leaving already?"

Instead of answering, Noah looked at his parents and Brooke answered for him, "ten more minutes"

Two adults joined the girl, each placing a hand on one of her shoulders, "hello" the mother greeted, "you must be Noah's parents?"

"Yes. Hi, I'm Brooke"

"Lucas" he shook hands with the other father. They introduced themselves as Paul and Maria, their daughter Nicola was nine and her attention was completely on Noah. On the other hand, Maria's eyes returned to Brooke over and over again with a question in them. Brooke could tell the other woman recognised Brooke's face but could not place where from, the children soon took charge of the conversation and it turned to Noah's upcoming birthday party.

When they parted Sam teased Noah, "someone has a girlfriend"

"Yes, Nicola is a girl and she is a friend" Noah didn't take the bait, he shook his head at Sam and clicked his tongue. Brooke gave a silent chuckle and sent Sam a warning look.

They were all exhausted after a busy few days, Brooke took her shoes off as soon as they were back in the limo, "our last night here" she whispered to herself.

The ride home grew quiet, Noah gave a large yawn and Sam started to drift off. The kids didn't fight the instruction to go straight to bed once they arrived in the apartment, they said goodnight and went on their way.

With a polite goodnight themselves Brooke and Lucas separated, so exhausted Brooke stripped down to her underwear and crawled into bed. Even though she was tired and felt it to her bones once her head hit the pillow in the dark quiet room, Brooke tossed and turned.

The only sound Brooke heard was the clock ticking by as it got later and later, eventually her eyes closed but it seemed to Brooke as she drifted in and out that she barely slept five minutes at a time. One time she checked the clock and saw it was nearly one in the morning.

Brooke shot awake, as she lay Brooke realised she was thirsty and climbed from the bed. Covering her nearly nude body with a silk robe Brooke tied the sash tightly and tip toed out of the bedroom.

As she turned the corner into the kitchen Brooke jumped at the sight of the man standing there, Lucas froze at her reaction, "sorry didn't expect anyone to be awake" Brooke went to get a glass.

A glass of water in his own hand Lucas was bent over the counter, "just thirsty" his eyes followed Brooke as she filled her glass up. She went to quickly leave and instinct tole Lucas to stop her, "I still can't believe we made this amazing, talented kid" his voice held such joy.

At the mention of Noah, Brooke stopped walking away and placed her drink down after a long gulp, she could still picture Noah from earlier in the night, "it's pretty amazing" she smirked and then her expression turned thoughtful, eyes down she added on "do you ever worry that he's too smart, that we've already missed six years and now that we have him back Noah is going to not need us"

Lucas shook his head, "he will always need us no matter if we can help him with his homework or not, there's so many other reasons he needs us for"

"You think?"

"I _know_ " Lucas found himself slipping closer, "he's already benefitted so much by having you in his life, Brooke. You are an amazing mother, never question that, you don't need to teach Noah algebra just keep teaching him how to smile"

"It's getting easier" she nodded, her eyes lifted not sure when Lucas had moved so much closer to her, "he started calling me mom and every time I hear it my heart feels like exploding"

"I'm happy for you"

"Thanks" Brooke couldn't keep looking at Lucas' blue eyes, she looked back down at her hands the movement causing a thick lock of hair to fall over her eyes.

Before Lucas could even think to stop himself, his hand shot out to touch the strands, Brooke jolted at the touch, standing straight she lifted her chin and Lucas' light grip finished it's move and he tucked the escaped lock behind her ear.

The now empty fingers hovered over Brook's cheek an inch of ait between his skin and hers yet Brook's face burned as if he was touching her and she grew warm. For a long moment Lucas' fingers stayed still and then they closed the distance and he touched her, his palm curled to gently cup her face.

 _Luke!_ Brooke's mind screamed but no words escaped her, instead a rush of air left her lungs and Brook's throat made a strange sound. A hand went up to push Lucas away but the moment that felt like slow minutes was barely a second and Brooke's hand betrayed her, fingers curling over to grip his shirt.

Who moved first, who or how they moved at all, was a mystery, a blur of confusion, and the only thing they knew in that moment was that somehow the air between them vanished. Their lips clashed together, their chest pushed together as their hands held onto the other.

At first it was a kiss, the only thing moving was their lips, almost as if they were frozen everywhere else, as frozen as their minds were, and then as if a match had been lit they exploded together.

As suddenly as they had found themselves kissing Brooke then found herself siting on top of the kitchen counter, Lucas between her spread thighs, one of her hands in the back pocket of his jogging pants and the other tangled in his hair.

Everything was warm, Lucas couldn't think, Brooke's dressing gown came undone slipping off her shoulders and pooling at her hips. There was a seemingly endless amount of bare skin beneath his hand, one clutching her waist and the other exploring one breast.

When had they moved, when had their mouths opened, Brooke could barely breathe but she heard a moan and had no idea who it came from. Lucas' body somehow got closer than she thought was possible and her legs spread wider as his hips nudged forward. The growing erection between them rubbed against the thin barrier of the clothing separating them, her fingers clutched the thin between them.

It wasn't until Brooke opened her eyes that she even realised she's closed them, neither one remembered who moved first or ho moved last. They moved as one.


	19. Somewhere Only We Know

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, and I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting. I do however own two broken dvd players, just another item that keeps breaking on me.**

 **So funny story… last chapter, mixed reactions. You know how I was rushed and under pressure because of my laptop, well one of the things I didn't do was actually check the outline of the chapter and story and I f'd up my whole timeline. But I will explain after the chapter. I would apologise in advance for what I'm about to do but instead I will say thank you for your understanding and your great response from the last chapter. I got a universal charger for my laptop and the tip they sent out that matches my laptop came the other day so I now have a charged laptop which is awesome. Yay for that.**

 **I would like the thank the guest reviews, GH Jasam Fan, salazaarjasam, bjq, Ivonne, k-pixy, brucas mc, new to brooke, notrob, lileen, brucaslove, breathbookslove, dianehermans, callison and clavyus. Clearly there are many mixed feelings about the cliffhanger, some loved it some hated it I am sure this chapter will make a lot of you even more… sigh. Anyways I don't really know what to say except thanks for the feedback and read on.**

Chapter Nineteen

The nights had been quiet but the days offered distractions, Haley stopped by every day to check on Peyton and the blonde was grateful. Haley was perched on the bed while Peyton remained under the covers propped up by too many pillows, "thanks Hales for taking care of me"

"I can't let you starve or my beautiful niece or nephew. How are you coping without Luke?"

Peyton covered her ever growing bump, "we're okay" she forced her smile to grow, "just a few more hour and he'll be home. It's strange being in this house without Lucas"

Voice growing more cautious Haley tried to appear normal, she began to clean up from their lunch, "and things are… better?"

"We're trying harder" Peyton nodded, she licked her lips even as she rubbed her belly, "eventually everything will get back to normal, we have this little one to keep us strong" she relaxed back into her pillows and smiled more. There was a new confidence in Peyton and Haley felt relieved, the blonde sighed "I don't know why I let myself get so stressed over high school drama. Other women would worry about their partner going away with their ex on a family trip but I'm lucky-" she gave a content closed lip smile "- I have nothing to worry about"

Haley almost choked, she was shocked by Peyton's change of attitude, "this is a change of tune" she sounded dubious.

With a laugh Peyton replied, "there was a time I forgot who we all are but this is Lucas and Brooke, she's my best friend, Brooke would _never_ cross the line. I got a bit crazy for a while but sometimes all that's needed is a reminder."

There were secrets buried inside Peyton's pale eyes and her smiles today, she rubbed her belly, content in her safe little world.

-x-

The silence as they waited at the airport was deafening and awkward, Sam reached for Brooke's hand and squeezed it feeling the older woman's conflicted feelings. Brooke sent her a grateful smile and Sam smiled back, though Brooke knew Sam had no idea the truth behind the sudden change within the group on this last day together.

Lucas sat all too aware Brooke wouldn't look at him, that the shadow in her eyes was shame and guilt. It circled through his thought what he should have done, what he should have said, and though Brooke's eyes gave away a sleepless night Lucas had slept and instead been plagues by dreams. The dreams had been so real Lucas was almost confused about what had actually happened and what was fantasy, he could still feel her skin beneath his touch and taste her on his lips.

When Nathan arrived to pick them up and take them home his welcoming grin dropped as soon as he saw his older brother and friend, locking his jaw Nathan opened the door to the car and slammed it a little too hard once the kids and Brooke were inside. At the trunk he helped Lucas pack away the luggage, Nathan hissed, "I warned you it was a bad idea"

"Nathan, leave it alone"

The tension increased on the drive, Nathan insisted on taking Brooke and the kids home first and Brooke seemed grateful at the idea of being back home as soon as she could. Lucas went to get out of the car and Nathan stopped him, he shook off his brother's hand and continued getting out, Lucas didn't go near Brooke as Nathan helped her unload their luggage but he gave Sam a hug good bye and then as he let her go Noah wrapped his arms around Lucas' middle and Lucas gently hugged his son as well, "I'll see in a couple of days" the hug ended as they pulled away from each other "love you."

Noah looked up at his father, "love you too, Dad" and his dimples were on show.

His breath hitched, Lucas just smiled the tension leaving him and ignoring Nathan's hints to get back in the car Lucas stood and waiting until the others were all safely inside, with one last wave to each other Lucas lost sight of his son. Nathan returned to the driver's side and had already started the engine by the time Lucas was back in his seat strapped in.

"You going to tell me what happened?" Nathan asked as he drove.

"What makes you so sure anything happened?"

Nathan scoffed, "you have that guilty puppy look on your face" his fist on the steering wheel tightened, "and Brooke… I know when she's angry and I sure can tell when she's angry at herself. Whatever, don't tell me, I'm not the one who you need to talk to" he hit the steering wheel, "damn it, Lucas! do you ever _think_ before you do anything"

"All I do it think" Lucas mumbled.

"Sure as hell don't seem like that"

Lucas looked out the window, "it was one kiss, we both ended it, we both moved away. Just one reckless kiss, okay, and, if you didn't notice, the chances of anything like that happening again is zero-" he faced Nathan "-Brooke and I will never be that close to each other again, you happy? You were right. Now you can keep harping about it but nothing you could possibly say I haven't already said to myself"

It was a few minutes before Nathan replied, "you gonna tell Peyton?"

"I don't know, Nathan, I just…" he stopped. _One kiss. One minute. That's all it was and I just want to forget it._ Brooke's words came back to him.

They were nearly at Lucas' house, "you better figure it out" Nathan parked in the driveway as he spoke his final words.

With a nod and a brief thank you Lucas got out and retrieved his suitcase, he more than anyone knew he had to do something.

Peyton was inside waiting for the sound of an engine, of the thud of a car door and the jingle of keys in the front door. She lay propped up as foot steps sounded down the hall way and then there he was, Lucas stepped into the room, he dropped his suitcase to the ground as his shoulders slumped.

Almost instantly their eyes met and Peyton saw something, a dark shadow in his eyes, an expression she knew well and she knew Lucas was going to hurt someone and that someone was probably her. With a shaky smile Peyton lowered her lashes, "hi" and as if the baby inside her new their daddy was home a swift kick hit Peyton's ribs and she covered a sudden lump that appeared on one side of her extended belly that was now lopsided.

Eyes trailing from Peyton's face to where her hand rested on her pregnant belly Lucas stopped one he reached where his child was rested peaceful and innocent, "hi" he replied back and stepped closer, "how are you?"

"I'm fine" but as she said it Peyton felt the tears start to fall in a steady quiet stream. The rest of her body didn't move it was just the silent stream of tears, "you?"

"Peyton?"

"What do I do, Lucas? What am I meant to do? I am stuck here, trapped by this pregnancy" she met his eyes and tried to smile "and you're out there, and you are here in front of me but… why do I feel like you're still not here"

Lucas moved, he quickly joined Peyton and reached for her hand, under his finders he could feel their child moving as real as the woman whose hand he held, "I'm sorry" he said it not once, the words once out repeated over and over again and Peyton's face fell forward her forehead falling against him and their heads propped each other up.

"I am so sorry, for everything, for all this confusion and doubt. I love you, I do, I love you and I never wanted to hurt you"

"But you will, right?" she wet her lips and could taste her tears, Peyton closed her eyes, "can't the past just be the past? What I've done, what you've done, all of it, can't we just let the past go" she squeezed the hand touching hers and with her other one moved it to where the baby had shifted to, her face started to lift up, her lips so close to his, "this is the future, this is our future"

"Peyt-" his voice tremored but he was stopped by her lips on his. Unable to return the kiss Lucas pulled back slightly, "Peyton"

"I don't care, I don't care" Peyton pleaded, "this was the dream, we are so close to everything we ever dreamed, I won't just throw it all away because of mistakes" her watery eyes met his trying to read him.

Lucas' pupils were flicking side to side and Peyton new he was trying to do the same, knew he was thinking things over and over again and trying to understand not just everything else but her and she smiled hopefully.

"That's what you want?"

"Let's just make this right, we can do that, we can make this right" her voice was so sincere and Lucas searched her eyes again.

Her tears had stopped and Lucas wiped Peyton's cheek with his thumb as he cupped her face, something tightened in his chest but he nodded, "marry me?"

Peyton laughed, "I've already said yes"

"I know, and I know I said I wanted to wait until the baby was born but let's do it now just the two of us and a couple of witnesses, here at home. Let's just do it"

"Yeah" her grin grew wider and as she laughed and wrapped her arms around him, her happiness so clear Lucas' heart settled in his chest, he gently embraced her back and his face dropped.

There was doubt inside him, so much doubt, but everyone had told him he needed to do something, and he knew he could make at least one person happy, three if he counted the children. Stability, clear lines, and love. Lucas told himself he could do that.

Peyton's loving laughter continued, a comfort that eventually caused Lucas to grin as well.

-x-

Shocked Lucas stared at his best friend and his brother, the couple had looks of horror on their face and Lucas was genuinely taken aback by their reactions, "you're really saying no?"

"Are you nuts?" Nathan yelled, "jumping into things is what got you into this mess"

"I don't get you both. I'm staying away from Brooke, I am committing to my relationship with Peyton, just like you both having been drilling into my head is what I should do but now I want to marry Peyton you're saying no and that I am crazy"

"It's great that you're taking this seriously but rushing into a wedding as a knee jerk reaction to what happened in New York is not the answer"

"What's the difference between now and in three months' time?" Lucas ran his hands through his hair, "I'm marrying Peyton, this is what she wants, this is what she has been begging me about for months"

 _No. No. There's nothing to talk about, you're marrying Peyton and I can't do this. I can't put my heart on a platter for it to be pecked at. I don't need to talk about it. Go home, go home to your wife._

Brooke's cutting words were still an echo, still playing in his mind as strongly as her touch still clung to his skin. Lucas threw his hands up in frustration, "I'm drowning here. Please, I'm asking for your help"

"It doesn't have to be now" Nathan's voice softened but Lucas looked beyond Nathan to where Haley had turned her back on him, he stared at his best friend for what seemed long enough he could count each strand of hair on the back of her head but was probably only a few seconds.

"Luke" Haley turned back around, her eyes bigger than normal, "it's not that we don't want to support you"

 _It's not that I don't care. No matter what I want you to know-_

 _What? What? This is why I can't do this, Broody. We can try to uncomplicate this but the more we try the more knots we are making. Let's just walk away now while the only causality of this stupidity is our dignity._

Haley looked to Nathan for help but quickly faced Lucas again, "but having us there isn't going to help you or Peyton. Please just take some time to breathe and think about it and If you still think this is-"

"Enough" Lucas yelled loudly causing Haley to jump, her words falling into the unknown, Lucas pointed at the two of them, "fine, don't come. That's your choice, but one day you may regret it because I'm marrying Peyton" he stormed off furious and as he retreated Haley covered her mouth, she leant against her husband.

"Are we horrible people?"

Nathan kissed the top of Haley's head, pulling his wife further into him, she sniffed, "I just fear he will be the one regretting it"

"It's his choice, Hales, and his regrets to have".

-x-

There was an impending dread within Brooke, she knew when she woke up earlier in the morning that it was going to be a terrible day. Brooke didn't know how she would keep standing, yesterday had been her last day as Sam's foster mother and though the trip to New York had allowed her to have such a special last memory of their time together it had also left a cloud over the day before.

Brooke could never get that time back but she had tried to best after they returned to Tree Hill to make it as easy and fun as she could. Today Brooke's heart was breaking but she was determined to keep her smile on because she didn't want Sam to know how much this was destroying her.

Victoria and Haley were with them, Jamie and Noah were both oddly quiet as they both walked with their mothers, and Sam leant against Brooke as they walked towards the building where half a year ago Brooke had received some of the scariest yet best news she had ever gotten. This was where her second chance with Noah had begun and now it was where her chance to be Sam's mother ended.

"I guess this is sayonara" Sam hugged Brooke's side before turning to look at the others, "you all made me feel like family"

Victoria touched Sam's hair, "as you shall always be" and with the slightest of smile, her lip barely lifting on one side, Victoria stepped back and Haley hugged the teenager.

"I may not be your teacher anymore but I'm always a phone call away, we'll miss you around here"

Almost as soon as Haley let air between them Jamie was jumping at Sam, "hey, little man, I won't be far. Once I get my license I'll come break you free every now and then" she looked at Haley as she hugged Jamie, "send you home full of ice cream"

Jamie held his tears in but he couldn't laugh, "you better" he warned and stepping back he tried to hide the fact he was on the verge of crying.

Having waited patiently Noah stood by Brooke watching, Sam turned to the little boy who had become like a brother "you too kid, I'm still going to annoy you" and as Noah took a step closer Sam didn't let him get away from her she leant down and pulled him into a tight hug, their faces buried into each other's necks.

"I'll miss you" Noah's voice was quiet and Sam gave a sad smile and leant slightly back.

Unable to resist Sam ruffled Noah's darkening hair, he scowled but didn't object, "you won't get a chance" and with those words Sam grabbed Brooke, "you'll see me so much you will get sick of it"

"Never" Brooke promised. They hugged longer than intended each one ready to pull away and then on trying to realised their arms wouldn't let go.

Just as Brooke felt she couldn't hold the tears in they let go of each other and Brooke's not very gracefully wipe at her eyes, the tears hadn't fallen yet but the move helped her to compose herself. The last thing Brooke felt like doing was smiling but she smiled at Sam because she loved the teenager and couldn't help it, "this isn't a goodbye"

Sam nodded, "it's a see you later" and with a hand still curled around Brooke's arms she gave one final nod of farewell to the others and then arm in arm they walked inside together.

-x-

Alone in his room Lucas struggled to do his own tie, his fingers didn't seem to work, frustrated he ripped it from his neck and threw it across the room.

A chuckle came from the doorway, so familiar it made Lucas' heart ache, he turned quickly knowing what he would see. Nathan stood there in a dark blue suit and white shirt, his hand in his pockets, "hey big brother, you need some help?"

"You came" Lucas closed his eyes as his head fell backwards, he was so grateful to have his brother with him, but then he stood tall, "I didn't think you would"

"I didn't want to regret missing out on being here for you, you've had my back with every stupid choice I ever made and I'll have yours" he picked up the tie and quickly put it back around Lucas' neck, his fingers deft.

Watching his brother do up his tie Lucas smiled "still think I'm making a mistake"

"Hey" Nathan shrugged, "only you know why your standing here. I love you both" finishing the task Nathan held Lucas by the back of his head and they looked into each other's eyes. Nathan smiled but his tone was serious, "just love each other and you'll be alright"

Lucas nodded and fixed his hair, he slipped his jacket on and looked in the mirror. From behind him Nathan smirked, "not bad, you're the fourth best looking Scott"

"Fourth?"

"I'm first," Nathan rolled his eyes, "obviously. The boys get their good looks from me too"

"Right" Lucas wiggled his arms trying to feel comfortable, "so I look okay?"

"Yeah"

Lucas wanted to move, he couldn't stay still yet he couldn't do much else, but as he looked at Nathan another question came to him, "is Haley here?"

Closed lipped Nathan shook his head and Lucas sighed. Nathan rested a hand on Lucas' shoulder, "at least one of us had to be here, you got me but Brooke got Haley today"

At the thought of Brooke, Lucas looked down again, "I'm glad, if things had been different I would have… you know, I was there when Angie left but…"

"I know" Nathan dropped his hand.

A knock on the door had them both turning, Skills stepped into the room "celebrant is set, y'all good?"

"All good" Nathan gave Skills a nod and thumped Lucas' shoulder, "no going back now. I'll see you up there" he pushed Lucas towards Skills.

Lucas quickly caught his step and joined Skills, together they went to join the last-minute celebrant Peyton had contacted. The elderly woman smiled at Lucas and he then turned to face the door on the other side of the porch, the door that he had once painted red for another woman and then painted black when she'd broken his heart. It was neither colour now and with Skills by his side Lucas waited.

With only half a day's notice Mia and Peyton had organised more than he would have thought possible. White flowers were everywhere, along the porch floor on either side of the red-carpet runner, along the banner and even hanging from the roof.

Lucas was wearing a classic black suit and tie with a white linen shirt, it was an old set but it was clean and ready having last been worn at Quinton's funeral. Skills eyed Lucas and then plucked a white Marigold from the vase on the table behind the celebrant, he placed it into Lucas' breast pocket.

Music started playing and Lucas smiled when he heard the steady beat of 'Always Love' by Nada Surf, the door opened and Mia stepped onto the porch first. The musician's hair was out, half covering her face, Lucas was so nervous he didn't notice the dress she was wearing and instead kept his eyes waiting for what was behind Mia.

Mia stopped and stood next to Skills and then they appeared, Peyton was on Nathan's arm, she was barefoot and little gave away how much she was relying on Nathan as she walked forward with a bunch of crimson roses and white daisies in her hands.

Lucas straightened up as Peyton sent him a smile. Her beautiful dark golden hair was clipped behind her head, a few loose curls brushing her cheeks and shoulders. The dress was a halter top, Lucas wasn't sure where Peyton had gotten it from and it was the least traditional wedding dress he had ever seen but is was Peyton. The black material clung to her swollen breast, clinching above the swell of her pregnant abdomen it then flowed down to the floor, black turning to smoky grey and gradually turning to the palest grey at the hem.

Together Nathan and Peyton walked along the red carpet, one foot in front of the other until they reached Lucas who took Peyton's arm from Nathan as Mia took the bouquet from Peyton.

Nathan stepped aside and Lucas and Peyton faced each other with nervous smiles, _hey_ she mouthed and Lucas mouthed it back.

"We're gathered here today.."

-x-

The office wasn't sterile, there was a round desk in the centre and children's toys stacked along one wall, the paint was too bright but Brooke wasn't looking at the room. Her eyes went over Carine to where Rebecca stood, the woman looked older than Brooke knew she was but her bright smile showed off the girl she used to be and Brooke knew that sixteen years ago she would have looked much like Sam.

Rebecca came straight to Brooke and hugged the other woman, her face was pale but happy tears were falling from her eyes when she stepped back from Brooke, "thank you! Thank you for everything you've done for Samantha. I can never say thanks enough" the older woman's hands were shaking and she reached for Sam's hand with a laughing smile.

Her obvious joy made it hard for Brooke to cope with her own more negative emotions about what was happening.

"Loving her and taking care of Sam will be thanks enough" Brooke almost choked on the words and Rebecca nodded giving her promise she would take care of Sam.

Before long, it was time for Brooke to leave and they found themselves hugging again, Brooke struggled to let go, "I liked being a Davis" Sam half laughed and half sobbed as she clung to Brooke, her words quiet.

Smiling against the teenager's neck Brooke squeezed hugger, "you'll always be a Davis to me"

"You'll always be my first Mom" Sam replied causing Brooke to swallow a hard sob.

They pulled apart, "not goodbye, right?" Brooke smiled wiping her eyes and Sam smiled back.

"I'll see you later, Brooke"

"See you, Sam"

Their hands dropped from each other and Sam joined Rebecca leaving Brooke oddly cold. It didn't quite feel real to Brooke as she left them and returned downstairs, the others were still waiting with sad smiles when Brooke approached. It was Noah who reached Brooke first, without a word he wrapped his arms around his mother and rested his head under her breast.

The moment was so sweet that the others only watched for a long moment and then as if by silent communication Brooke found herself surrounded by warm arms.

-x-

The world looked the same, though Lucas Scott looked down at the simple band that now graced his left ring finger and knew everything was different. He was _married,_ the word went over and over in his head, he had expected something to feel different, perhaps for things to fall into place.

On his finger the ring felt heavy, Lucas rubbed it with his thumb unused to weight and feel of it. A sudden heat ran up his neck and Lucas stepped away from Peyton, he excused himself from the small group.

In the kitchen Lucas grabbed and drink and quickly swallowed it. Everything was meant to be simpler now. He took another long cold swallow.

With a waddle Peyton appeared, Lucas' face appeared guilty as he was caught standing there but seeing Peyton dressed in her wedding dress had Lucas pause. She was beautiful, her smile eased some of the confusion inside him as Lucas was reminded why he as where he was. Too many choices had been made already and Lucas knew Peyton needed him and, in many ways, Lucas needed her too.

Peyton wanted Lucas, she wanted a future and a family with him, her surety was something that helped give him direction, helped soothe the ache of the lonely abandoned boy he'd one been.

"Drink?" Lucas asked to distract from his abrupt departure from the other room.

Peyton nodded and with a sigh leant against the table top exhausted, "I can't wait to have a real drink" she sent him another glance "anda _real_ honeymoon"

"We'll get there"

"The important thing is we're together" Peyton held out her left hand and smiled at her wedding ring, "Mrs Scott" she said it to herself, "Mrs Sawyer-Scott… that's bad. I'm Mrs Scott" her accent thickened as she repeated her new moniker.

Joining his wife Lucas bent down and kissed her cheek, "well Mrs Scott, let's go re-join our guest, we have the rest of our lives to figure out who we are" and he grabbed for her hand to lead the way out.

-x-

The house felt naked, Brooke no longer felt natural in her own home, and even though it was a warm day outside Brooke still slipped on a cardigan to cover herself like a security blanket.

Victoria's efforts to comfort Brooke had been so awkward Brooke had sent her mother home to get ready to leave North Carolina for an important business meeting Brooke had made Millie set up last minute, if Victoria wanted to feel helpful Brooke would happily oblige Victoria as long as it wasn't near her at the moment.

"Give yourself time to adjust" Haley lounged on the couch resting up on her elbow.

"It's just so quiet" Brooke looked around the room, "I used to love this place" Brooke sighed. Her eyes went over everything, not much was different yet everything was.

"Are you still thinking about moving?" Haley asked.

Brooke averted her eyes and smiled, "actually…" her dark eyes met Haley, "I got a call this morning, my offer was accepted, I got the house. I want to be happy and a part of me is, of course, but I didn't expect it to be just Noah and I moving in"

"It's a _big_ house" Haley's eyes widened.

Brooke nodded, "I know. Too big maybe"

"No, no, Brooke. There's many ways to fill it… hey maybe you should ask Victori-"

"Don't even think it" Brooke glared at Haley and the other woman laughed, she gave her Brooke Davis pout "what if Sam decides she wants to come back but we've moved into this house that doesn't feel like home to her"

Sympathetic Haley reached out and rubbed Brooke's arm, "honey, Sam wouldn't want you staying here to wait for her. If Sam wants to come home to you what house it is won't matter, as young as you're there"

"She's not coming back" Brooke whispered.

Haley hugged Brooke, "I don't think so. You can cry if you need to" Haley added knowing Brooke was doing her best to act strong.

They remained silent for a while, resting on the couch still hugging. When Brooke's leg started going to sleep she pulled away, "I'm going to be fine" she reassured her friend.

Haley nodded, her thoughts went elsewhere, "I know. You're stronger than even you know, Brooke, and there's so many more amazing things out there waiting for you. Just focus on you and Noah"

"Speaking of, I should go check on the boys" Brooke left Haley to check on Noah and Jamie, she only ducked her head into the room before leaving again, "they're fighting each other on the Xbox"

Off the couch Haley was now standing by the front window, her eyes down on her phone, she jumped when Brooke reappeared, "huh?"

"Jamie and Noah, they're still playing Xbox. You okay?"

"I'm fine. Nathan just texted me"

"Right" Brooke was grateful for Haley but knew Haley had her own life, "you don't need to stay here, I'll be fine. Besides, I have Noah"

Haley's expression changed, "actually there's something I wanted to warn you about before I go. I don't know how to tell you" struggling to get it out Haley played with her own hands.

A confused Brooke crossed the living area, "it can't be that bad"

Haley took a step back, "Lucas and Peyton got married today"

Everything froze, Brooke stopped and narrowed her eyes not sure she heard right, "sorry, what? I thought you said-"

"I did. They decided to get married before the baby was born, at home with a couple of witnesses. It all happened fast but by now they should be Mr and Mrs Scott" Haley didn't know whether to smile or wince and the blank look on Brooke's face gave nothing away.

The silence became tense, finally Brooke moved, her chin relaxed "oh" her lips parted and a familiar smile took over her face which Haley knew well, "that's just great" her hands came up and she clasped them for a second before they dropped down again. She was smiling but it didn't reach her eyes or even her cheeks, Brooke's famous dimples were weak, her whole face looked tight, Haley knew this smile was laced with hidden fury.

Now Haley winced, "you okay?"

"I'm great, just great, why wouldn't I be great, this is great. I'm happy for them, it's great news" the words fell out in a tirade and Brooke sounded anything but happy. Haley wasn't sure great was even a real word anymore for it no longer sounded natural, Brooke laughed "that's what they both wanted so…" she waved her hand.

"Yes, great. I got that impression. Maybe I shouldn't have told you"

Brooke shook her head, "no, you're right, I needed the warning. Now you really should go get that gorgeous son of yours and take him home, I guess I have packing to start thinking about" her words were hurried and Brooke quickly went to tell Jamie he was going home, the goodbyes were slightly awkward and Brooke sidestepped away from Haley's hug to rush her friend leaving.

Once the door was shut the cracks began to show in Brooke, her nose turned red, she made it to her bedroom just in time. With it closed behind her Brooke collapsed back against her door, as the tears started to flow and her shoulders shook she slid down to the floor.

Now she had started Brooke couldn't stop, all the emotions she had been holding in over the last forty eight hours escaped in a flood.

-x-

In his car the next afternoon Lucas looked out the window up at Brooke's house, his eyes drifted to his hand and after a moment of thought Lucas slipped off his ring and put it in his pocket. His intention wasn't to hide it from Brooke but he didn't want her to see the wedding ring before he told her.

Guilt was already filling him, he didn't know what was worse, that he felt like he was betraying Peyton or that a part of him felt like he was betraying Brooke.

Lucas didn't feel married, he had to keep reminding himself it wasn't just a dream. They'd discussed having a proper reception after the birth and once they were settled in, and a proper honeymoon. The latter had Lucas nervous, they hadn't been intimate in months since the doctor said it was no longer safe, and if Lucas was honest their sex life had dwindled even before that. Last night had been their wedding night but much to Peyton's obvious frustration they could not celebrate in the way she had wanted to, Lucas had promised that when they could both get the same enjoyment they would have a wedding night to remember but he'd been happy she hadn't pressed alternatives.

Getting out of his car Lucas gulped, he didn't want his first time with Peyton after their wedding to be shadowed by anything else. It didn't feel fair to her and guilt and shamed still flowed through his body over what had happened in New York.

As much as they could say it was only a moment, barely a minute, the passion that had flared up had lasted longer, heating Lucas' body the entire night. His dreams had been so real that Lucas felt that though they hadn't actually had sex it still felt like they had. Lucas and Brooke had pulled away from each other but that hadn't stopped his body wanting to be closer and it had been Brooke's name on his lips when he was moaning in the shower in the middle of the night trying to ease the desire, and her touch and face he'd imagined.

Barely forty-eight hours later and Lucas now wore another woman's ring on the same hand that had betrayed Peyton, still he couldn't shake that feeling that he was betraying Brooke as well.

Lucas reached the door and knocked, it swung open and Brooke was there, her hair loose around her face, she was looking at him yet at the same time her eyes didn't quite meet his and she kept the door half closed between them, "Noah's just grabbing his notebook" and then she eyed him up and down before finally looking into his blue eyes.

Lucas swore Brooke's eyes were black today, they lacked sparkle, her smiled didn't reach nearly high enough but she tried to smile at him, "so, I hear congratulations are in order"

"Uh-"

"Congratulations Luke"

"Thanks. Does Noah know?" he tried to look behind Brooke for a sign of Noah.

She shook her head, "I thought he should hear it from you"

"I wanted to tell you" Lucas quickly said.

"You don't owe me any explanations" and with a hard smile she opened the door wider, "here he comes" and Noah speed walked over to them.

"Hi Dad!" Noah held out his hand for their handshake and then quickly started down the stairs once it was over, "bye Mom!"

"Have a good time" Brooke waved, her focus on Noah, though Lucas still stood in front of her, she could feel him staring at her, "you should go" she looked at him and he gave a nod following Noah down and slipping the ring from his pocket back onto his finger.

-x-

 **So… that's that chapter. Quite a band aide Lucas has decided to use, not like this can backfire on them at all, right.**

 **Now that funny story, you know how I mentioned that the pressure of last chapter of trying to write it one handed with a dying laptop and not doing things I usually do like check in with my story outline and chapter outline. I have a page with big moments mapping out the timeline, usually when I get to a chapter or a group of chapter I get chapter outlines, I usually have one sentence for upcoming chapters and then as I get a couple of chapters away I start filling out the outline with point form layout of order of scenes etc. some chapter outlines are longer than other chapters, some are real detailed other are vague.**

 **It's not the first time I've thrown away the chapter outline but usually I check it over, so the whole NY controversial BL kiss…. Was never meant to happen. Yep. I fucked up my storyline and timeline because I didn't open a second word page and check my notes which would have reminded me that they were meant to have an** _ **almost**_ **kiss, a moment when they know they are having a moment recognise it and get the f away from each other. Then in the next chapter once they're back and Sam has to go give Sam back to her birth mother in a very s5 BL/Angie vibe Lucas was meant to be the one to comfort Brooke afterwards at her house, and during that vulnerable moment they were meant to actually kiss and then Brooke sends Lucas home to Peyton where he proposes they get married straight away. So do you guys think the original plan would have worked better?**

 **Also I had to rewrite the start of this chapter, I had written 2 pages and it originally started immediately after they pulled away from the kiss and went over all the emotions thoughts and feeling over the rest of the night. I really liked it. But a computer went spaz and I don't know what I pressed but one minute I am typing away and then in the next second my word document was closing. Without saving. Two pages all gone! I tried rewriting it but I just could not recapture what I had originally wanted so I just scrapped it and started the chapter at a different point. And now I am saving after I finish every paragraph, until I get slack again.**

 **And don't stress, marriage isn't final. There's annulment, divorce… death, I have options. Just saying. I don't write fanfic to give a couple who should never have had an onscreen endgame another endgame for my mind.**


	20. Chapter 20

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, and I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting.**

 **I would like to thank all the reviewers of last chapter, the guest reviewers and bjq, bobilina, Megan, BrookeLucas, Lileen, Brucas, MM, notrob, breathbookslove, Ivonne, callison, GH Jasam Fan, New to brooke, princesakarlita411 and Diane hermans. Big thanks, very thoughtful reviews, and I expected many not to like it so I was prepared for it but still happy with the responses. I did smile at how close some peoples suggestions are to my plans.**

 **Your response was great so I apologise that I haven't; had time to write and update, I am well aware this is later than even I expected. It's a busy time of the year and the school holiday's has kept me on my toes. This is another busy week but next week I should have plenty of time to write.**

Chapter Twenty

Sitting cross legged on her bed, wrapped in her silk robe, Brooke gently lifted the lid from the box. Only once a year did Brooke dare to open this particular box, it usually brought a strange mix of sadness and secret joy, feelings so strong Brooke had only ever been able to cope with it one day a year, the day she could never hide from thoughts of her son. His birthday.

Everything Brooke had of her pregnancy and son before he came back into her life was inside this box. All the medical details, the ultrasound photos, the beanie that Brooke had taken from the hospital that had been put on Noah's head. One photo she had been given that barely showed Noah's face.

There wasn't enough, not nearly enough and Brooke cried as she touched each object, cried with the fact that this was all she had for years and now asleep under the same roof was her son in the flesh, so close she could see him whenever she wanted.

Her finger tips trailed over the envelopes tucked in the corner, she could still remember the emotion when she wrote them. Brooke left the unopened letters and picked up the beanie, lifting it to her nose and breathed in the scent.

A noise somewhere in the house had Brooke return to the present and wiping her tears away Brooke placed the lid back on.

Today the small box was just one box amongst many, they had started packing their things but the new house was not quite ready. Brooke had organised for the house to be painted and for new wallpaper for where she wanted it, but all the work she'd ordered was due to be completed over the next week and within a week they were expected to have moved in. It was the benefit of having money and knowledge of what you wanted, Brooke didn't waste time, and she'd already known the changes she wanted.

She slipped from her bed and tiptoed across the hall to Noah's room, he slept peacefully and Brooke couldn't help but sit down on the floor and stare at him.

Though her tears had dried Brooke's heart was full. A small voice broke the quiet morning,  
"Mom… are you okay?"

"Hey, sweetie, sorry if I woke you" she rested up on her knees to get closer, gently stroking his hair as his green eyes opened to look at her.

"That's okay"

Brooke smiled, "happy birthday"

"Thanks" he rolled over to face Brooke, a frown marring his smooth skin.

"You okay?"

"I was already awake; Lily's snoring is very loud"

Unable to stop herself Brooke laughed which caused Noah to frown more, "she didn't snore last night" he added.

Brooke nodded and slowly collected herself, "would you like to come lay in my bed with me?"

"Yes, please"

"Come on then" Brooke moved his blanket out of the way and Noah hopped out of his bed, bringing his pillow with him. Together they crawled under the covers of Brooke's bed, their heads lay close together and Brooke breathed it in. The scent of her boy, right in arms reach.

-x-

It was just before seven o'clock in the morning when Lucas returned from his morning run, Peyton was still asleep when he went in the shower but by the time he was out and dressed Peyton was up and sitting in the kitchen a glass of juice in front of her and a coffee waiting opposite.

Lucas thanked his wife, slightly surprised by the more solemn look on her face. Since the wedding Peyton had become more optimistic and relaxed but today Lucas could see the old strain returning and knew thoughts were going around and around in her head. He placed a morning kiss on her cheek before grabbing the coffee and moving to the counter, "want me to make you some breakfast before I go?"

It would be the first time Lucas would have to be around Brooke for any length of time, where conversation would be expected, since he'd married Peyton. It was unavoidable on Noah's birthday and Lucas wasn't going to miss out on it because of other issues.

Peyton wasn't happy about the plans and even less so because she couldn't come, they'd made allowances for the party in the afternoon but Lucas had reminded her how important rest was for her.

"Sure" Peyton mumbled in response and Lucas quickly cut up the fruit and made toast for Peyton, it was all she wanted in the morning these days and he placed it in front of her, gave his wife another kiss, and sat down to finish the coffee that was fast becoming cold.

It came quickly, Peyton huffed "I still don't understand why Karen and Andy are staying with Brooke and not us"

"Because Brooke has the beds for them and Lily, and we don't have the space" he kept his voice calm as he explained again.

"Don't you think it's weird though?" Peyton frowned.

Lucas gave a heavy sigh, "no, my Mom and Brooke have always been close, you know that"

"Yes, but we're family, and hell even Nathan and Haley have tonnes of spare rooms"

"Brooke is family too, even before Noah came Mom still considered Brooke family, don't over think it Peyt, Ma loves you too" he reassured her.

"Yeah, I know" she pulled apart her toast with a faraway look on her face, "you better leave. Everyone will be waiting for you"

Lucas knew Peyton wanted him to stay but he finished his coffee and gave her another kiss on the cheek, saying goodbye Lucas left her sitting alone in the kitchen, lost in her thoughts.

The mood at Brooke's house was more jovial, Lucas could hear everyone even before the door opened, and he was embraced by his mother and pulled in.

All the adults were dressed but the children were still in their pyjamas, Lily ran to Lucas and he picked her up placing his little sister on his hip as he walked over to Noah, carefully balancing the gift bag in his free hand..

Brooke was in the kitchen, Karen had re-joined her, but she turned away as Lucas came close while Karen kept her attention on the scene.

Lucas placed Lily back at the dining table, the present on the floor, and grinned at Noah, "happy birthday, son!"

"Thanks Dad"

Lucas lifted an eyebrow in question, "can I give you a birthday hug?"

"Sure" Noah shrugged and Lucas went in for the hug, after a brief pause Noah hugged Lucas back.

They pulled apart and Lucas studied Noah's face, "hmm, well you definitely look at least twenty-four hours older today"

"Noah's seven now, Luke!" Lily was so excited, she bounced on her seat and her piggy tails swung with every bounce, "we were both six for a little bit but now he's older again" she giggled, "my friend Honey is an Auntie too, she's got lots of nieces, and one is _thirteen_ " her eyes widened, "that's like a bazillion years older"

"Lily talks a lot" Noah looked at his father when Lily paused, "I don't know how she breathes, I've asked if I can time her"

Andy walked around them, he placed a hand on Lucas' shoulder as he passed "women, mate"

"It's easy, Noah, see" Lily happily started singing happy birthday, not stopping between the words of the song. Lucas smiled, she was always so happy and he loved how her accent had started to change.

Karen asked for calm and Lily stopped though the little girl looked like she was about to burst. Lucas turned his focus back to Noah, "so what did the birthday boy pick for breakfast?"

"Eggs benedict"

"Sounds delicious" Lucas' smile waivered as he turned to the direction of the kitchen, he appeared hesitant and Brooke instantly glared at Lucas.

"Relax, your mom is in charge of the kitchen"

Karen chuckled, "everything is nearly ready but I don't want to start until Victoria arrives"

Lucas' face fell, and as if the thought of her had conjured the woman Victoria breezed in from the front door, her hands full with two presents.

Ignoring everybody else Victoria went straight to Noah, "Happy birthday, darling" she kissed his cheek and placed the presents in front of Noah.

"Hi, Mother" Brooke tried to smile, "do you remember Lucas' mom, Karen, and this is her husband Andy and daughter Lily"

"Yes, yes" Victoria gave the others a disinterested smile, "it's lovely to see you again" she pushed the presents closer to Noah, "open up-"

"We were going to have breakfast first" Brooke cut in and leaving the kitchen took the presents from the table and set them aside, "Noah would you like to help?"

"No, thank you"

"I will" Lily offered and jumped up immediately, the room went silent as Karen coked breakfast with the help of Lily and Brooke.

On either side of Noah, Victoria and Lucas sat, their eyes met and Victoria lifted her chin "I hear you married Miss Sawyer"

"I did"

Victoria stared him down and Lucas shifted uncomfortably, Brooke made a warning sound with her throat and Victoria rolled her eyes before adding, "good luck"

" _Mother!_ "

"Is good luck not a positive thing?" Victoria sent Brooke an impassive face before turning her attention back to Noah. The boy sat up straighter, "now, my boy, are you excited about the new school year?" Victoria asked Noah.

"It's his birthday, why don't we discuss that?" Brooke was regretting inviting her mother.

"Nonsense, we can discuss both. Noah was telling me the other day that he was thinking of joining the chess club, I thought that was an excellent idea"

Noah's eyes did light up at the mention and Brooke smiled, "that would be nice"

"Nicola is on the chess team, and she said Mr Dyer has a school tournament at the end of each year where we get to play against parents. Grandma Victoria can be in it too"

"You will have to help me practice" Victoria sent her grandson a secret smile, Lucas was shocked at how different Victoria seemed around Noah. Then Victoria looked up and her expression changed, she glanced meaningfully at Lucas before facing Brooke, "there's another matter I wanted to discuss with you as well, I tried calling you"

"We've been busy. Can it wait?" Brooke was clearly exasperated.

Victoria sighed, "I don't suppose anyone's had time to go to a newsstand then"

Brooke froze, her mind wondering what Victoria could mean, knowing that Brooke's name was probably in the media again. _Today of all days,_ Brooke's stomach dropped, she had known eventually the media would pick up on Noah's existence.

In the silence Victoria pulled a magazine from her bag and sashayed towards Brooke to drop it on the kitchen counter with a loud smack, "it's also all over the gossip sites"

As soon as Brooke saw the pictures and read the captions her body sagged in relief before she really took it in, "must have been a quiet news day"

"You hadn't been in New York for months and your love life hasn't been media fodder since you've relocated to Tree Hill, this was bound to happen with such photographs. Really it's a surprise they didn't release them sooner"

Brooke wanted to swear, "these pictures are totally taken out of context"

Sensing the undercurrent, Karen asked Andy to take the kids out to the deck, and then took gently took the magazine from Brooke's hands, "don't worry about it, Brooke. They're just pictures, everyone who matters knows they're innocent" and she gave a motherly smile as she abandoned the magazine and rubbed Brooke's back.

She felt the eyes burning into and unable to look up Brooke gave a nod, "of course"

A curious Lucas slid the open magazine over to himself to find himself staring at images from New York, Lucas was not recognisable in the photos but anyone who knew him well would be able to recognise him easily. They were from the day Brooke and Lucas had spent together, a few snaps in Central Park, one with them lying on the grass, Lucas' propped up on one elbow as he looked down at Brooke whose face could clearly be seen smiling from the gap between Lucas' back and arm, and two more that must have been taken one after the other. Lucas was aware the photos were from when Brooke had tripped but the way the photo was shot gave the impression they were embracing and one of them appeared as if they were kissing.

"We ignore it, of course" Victoria closed the magazine even as Lucas was looking at the photos, "I just thought you should know" she then grabbed the magazine and threw it in the bin.

Brooke gave another nod and quickly left them to go collect Andy and the children, and it wasn't long before they all sat enjoying breakfast. Even Victoria complimented Karen, everyone enjoyed the food though Lily was slow to eat and was the last one with food still on her plate.

"Presents now" Victoria immediately rubbed her hands together.

More enthusiastic than the birthday boy himself, Lily gave an excited clap, "Yes! Yes!" she giggled and running from the table she screamed "open mine first" and returned with a brightly wrapped package.

"Thank you" Noah accepted the gift. Broke ushered everyone to the living room before Noah opened it, on the way they all collected their presents for Noah.

It was a struggle for Noah to open the heavily taped gift from Lily, eventually the wrapping paper was gone and Noah lifted a box lid. Inside was a handmade card and Noah gently handled it and read it in his head before placing it back and pulling out the present.

"It's a rock" Lily told everyone.

"How exciting" Victoria smiled.

Unperturbed Lily continued, "now you have a piece of New Zealand and if you look real, real close, see right there, there's a shell stuck in it… and I painted the other side. Yellow cause it's your favourite and a heart for love because I love you. See the basketball, that's for your daddy and I did a pretty red dress for Brookie and a book for you 'cause you love books and stuff"

"What are those?" Noah pointed to the blue blobs.

"Stars!" Lily grinned, "I love stars, they're so pretty and sparkly"

Noah gave a shy smile, one side of his lips curling up, "I like stars too. Thank you, Lily"

"You're welcome"

Victoria was next, she handed Noah the smaller present first, a beautiful personalised journal, and then the second present came. Noah unwrapped it to reveal a stunning chess set, even Brooke could appreciate the beauty of it though she had looked twice at one before she played with Noah.

"Mom, that's lovely" Brooke complimented, sincerely touched at her mother's thoughtful gifts. Noah's eyes were large as he explored each piece before without a word he gently hugged Victoria. Noah pulled away shortly, "thank you, I will take good care of it".

Next Karen and Andy gave Noah a couple of books, his favourite one about ancient civilisations, and another small smile showed on his face. Lucas gave Noah the telescope, a camera and a Lego set.

When Lily asked what Brooke had gotten Noah, Brooke simply kissed the top of Noah's head and gave a knowing smile, "that's a surprise for later".

-x-

The party was in full swing by the time Peyton arrived at Nathan and Haley's house, Skills had been given the job to pick Peyton up and he helped her into the wheelchair that had been the condition of her coming, humming happily as he pushed her to the backyard to where the party was.

Brooke had hired staff to set the party up but Peyton knew Lucas had helped plan the party with her via text messages. Despite the distance between them Peyton wasn't surprised how well it had turned, Brooke was always good at throwing a party, and they had organised a big pool party for Noah. A bouncy castle and giant slippery slide were on the grass, she knew there were meant to be nineteen children at the party, the invite list including Jamie, Lily and Andre, as well as fifteen from Noah's school. Looking around Peyton could tell that the children ranged all the way to perhaps twelve or thirteen.

"There's Luke" Skills pointed out and pushed Peyton to where Lucas stood talking to Nathan and Mouth. Lucas put down his drink when he noticed Peyton, he took over for Skills.

Peyton grinned, "everything looks great"

"Noah's having a good time" Lucas nodded his head in the direction of the pool where Noah was, Peyton gave the boy a cursory look before searching for her mother in law in the crowd, eventually spotting Karen in the bouncy castle with Jamie and Lily.

Peyton was so lost in her thoughts it took Nathan three tries before Peyton answered to her own name, she accepted his offer for a drink and dragged her eyes back to Lucas looking up at him, "so many people here, I should go say hi to Karen"

"I'm really happy to see Noah has made friends at school" Lucas smiled, his fingers resting on Peyton's shoulder, "I'm so proud at how well he has coped"

"It's like he's always been here" Nathan nodded.

Unable to help it Peyton turned to look at Noah again, with his hair wet it looked as dark as his mother's, three other children were playing in the pool with him and Brooke was right there with them. Peyton's eyes watched Brooke happily splash the kids, her head falling back in wild laughter as they splashed her back.

In the pool Brooke wiped the wet hair away from her face, she opened her eyes and reached forward to grab Noah, she lifted him as high as she could before dropping them both down in the water. Together they came back up, this time Noah wiped Brooke's hair out of her eyes and the two of them stared at each other, eyes locking, the rest of the world disappeared, "I love you, Noah"

He smiled, his dimples becoming deeper as it reached his eyes. Brooke smiled back, wishing she could pause the moment.

A splash from behind Noah as his friends went back to the playing around broke the moment, mother and son both turned their faces away. Haley's voice came from the side of the pool next, "Brooke, Noah, do you want to play one of the games now?"

A chorus of yes came from the children in the pool, five minutes later everyone had surrounded Brooke on the grass, "okay, the name of the game is Dunk a Dad. Our first volunteer is the birthday boy's own dad, Mr Lucas Scott himself" Brooke kept her eyes on the crowd as she gestured her arms in the direction of the dunking tub.

Everyone cheered as Lucas pulled off his shirt, earning a few wolf whistles from his friends and the ladies present, and climbed up to take his seat.

Brooke continued, "now kids line up, everyone gets three tries at a time to hit the bullseye and send a Dad down. The quicker a Dad is dunked the more we send up and if you dunk a dad you win a prize"

The first try was Lily, she failed to hit the target, four more kids including Noah had tried, Lucas was laughing as he crossed his arms with confidence.

"Give me a go" Nathan tried to take a ball.

Brooke quickly took it off him, "kids first"

"I want to dunk you, Dad!" Jamie cut in. They were still bantering when with a whoosh Lucas dropped into the waiting tub of water beneath him. A loud cheer went up catching everyone's attention.

Out of the three of them it was Jamie who turned first to see the person who had dunked Lucas, and his loud scream had Brooke spinning around.

"SAM!"

Noah was already next to Sam, the teenager had one arms around the younger boy and ruffled Jamie's hair when he joined them. Then Sam looked to Brook, "hi, sorry I'm late"

"You're just in time".

-x-

Everything was going better than she could imagine, Brooke hummed to herself as she got the cake ready in Nathan and Haley's kitchen. Sam sat on the counter, her legs dangling on the edge as she snacked on a bowl of popcorn she'd swiped from a table outside, "anything else new?"

"Not really" Brooke placed the last candle on and stepped back.

Sam tilted her head in doubt, "what? It's been three days since we've talked and nothing's happened, the last time we went three days Lucas had married Peyton, you got a new house and Jamie's grandad wanted to meet Noah. And you're telling me this time no drama" Sam scoffed before throwing to pieces of popcorn into her mouth.

"I ordered some curtains" Brooke smiled, her eyes twinkling at Sam and then he became serious, "what do you think?"

After a glance at the cake Sam nodded, "yeah cool, the kid will like it" and she went to wipe her finger against the frosting but Brooke smacked it away, "gee's, it's not like you made it, all you did is add candles"

"Not the point" Brooke frowned and when Sam mumbled something under her breath Brooke grinned, "sorry, what was that"

"Nothing"

"I thought so" Brooke took the bowl from Sam and pulled her down, "go get everyone ready for the cake"

"Fine, fine" Sam grumbled but left the kitchen, passing Peyton on her way. The blonde entered the kitchen, a fake smile on her face, "hey, Brooke, did you need any help?"

"I'm fine, thanks, you should be sitting anyway"

Peyton leant against the fridge, "I'm not so fragile" and she waited.

Trying not to sigh Brooke searched for the matches, she did her best not to acknowledge Peyton's presence but the blonde watched Brooke carefully, "so… I expected you to visit me"

"We've been busy"

"It's just, I got married and you're my best friend and I thought maybe you would-"

"Seriously?" Brooke turned to face Peyton, her cheeks red, anger rising quickly "it's my son's birthday and you want to do this now?"

Peyton smiled, "I'm just-"

"Oh, cut the act, Peyton. I know what you are doing. Today isn't about you and I would like to keep it that way"

"Okay" Peyton licked her lips, "If you're going to be hostile I won't bother"

Brooke almost bit her tongue, "right because your passive aggressive comments weren't hostile at all" Brooke sighed "look, I appreciate that you're ready to put everything behind us and I should be okay with that but I'm not okay, I've never been okay with it"

"Well maybe I'm not okay with you galivanting around New York with my husband, I already knew of course, Lucas tells me everything" Peyton laughed "but fine, you can be the one who isn't okay"

As soon as Peyton turned her back Brooke regretted talking back to her, there had been something smug in Peyton's smile and a tone in her voice that had Brooke on edge She swore and took a moment to catch her breath before finishing her task of lighting the candles.

With care Brooke picked up the cake board and started to walk outside, as soon as she appeared everyone started singing and Brooke felt her joy come straight back. Nothing would take away from the happiness of this day.

-x-

Brooke started collecting the rubbish, watching the view of Noah playing with three kids from school on the slippery slide. Still dressed in her black swimsuit, hair nearly dry, sarong tied around her waist, Brooke enjoyed the warmth of the sun against her skin, she basked in it for a moment before glancing back to Noah.

Eyes still on Noah, Brooke went to turn around, crashing into a hard chest as she did so, "so sorry" she said and bent down to pick up the bag of rubbish at the same time the man did. They both stood up each with a hand on the plastic bag.

"Sorry, my fault. I'm looking for one of Noah's parents" he seemed unsure.

Brooke smiled warmly, "well you've found one of them. Hi, I'm Br-" she dropped the bag and held up her hand.

"Brooke Davis… I know" he laughed, "I never saw you as the Mom type but it suits you" their hands slowly let go of each other and Brooke narrowed her eyes.

He was tall, very blonde and broad, with dark blue eyes, Brooke watched as he smiled, the dimple in his chin and his large smile ringing bells, "oh my god, Hot Brick?"

"These days people just call me Brick"

Brooke wrapped her arms around him in a quick hug and then punched his arm as she pulled away, "what are you doing here?"

"Picking up my son"

"Small world, which ones yours?"

Brick searched the crowd before pointing to one of the boys playing with Noah, "Zane"

Across the party Mouth sat on the dunking board, he looked down at his friends metres away, Millie's throw missed by a mile but Mouth had been distracted, "who is that talking to Brooke?"

There was a collective turn of heads, Lucas clenched his jaw and took a deep swallow of hi drink, everyone was confused except for Haley and Skills, they both soon answered, "Brick" and only got confused looks in return.

Skills was the one who explained further, "Brick Mirskey, Bevin's brother, he's some big shot lawyer in Raleigh"

"Remember, Luke, he dated Vivian her senior year" Haley added.

Nathan nodded, "Hot Brick! I remember him. Shame Peyton left early, she had the biggest crush on him in middle school, all the girls did, Bevin had a slumber party every week during summer break"

Placing his bottle down Lucas grabbed the ball and threw it as hard as he could, a second later Mouth went into the dunk pool, Lucas ran after the ball, "everyone's starting to leave, we should help clean up"

"Ah, man, we're the guest" Skills moaned but despite his complaint he helped. They started with collecting the abandoned drinks and clearing the food, not many guests were left and within minutes the party was reduced to their group and family except for one boy and his father who still stayed close to Brooke talking and helping the pack away too.

Within half an hour it looked as if there had never been a party as the bouncy castle was deflated and carried out.

Skills left, then Mouth and Millie, Victoria was next and then Brooke and Noah left behind Karen and Andy. Hesitant Lucas gave the yard another look making sure nothing had been missed and then went inside, Nathan offered Lucas a beer and the two brothers relaxed.

"You survived" Nathan cheered, tapping their bottles together.

Haley reappeared, she carried small rectangular present, "did Noah leave a present?" Lucas held his hand out to take it from Haley.

"No, it's for you" his sister-in-law replied, "from Brooke"

Lucas unwrapped the present unsure what was instore for him, when the gift wrap was gone Lucas let out a deep breath, his eyes stung from the tears that threatened to fall.

"It's a copy of Noah's new birth certificate" Lucas smiled as he whispered the words to Haley and Nathan, his eyes glued to the names. No longer did it proclaim father unknown, with Lucas' name clearly printed and his surname added to Noah's own.

He hadn't known how much it would have meant to him until he saw the letters printed in front of him, Lucas touched the framed certificate then his eyes were drawn to the blurry image in the right corner and Lucas recognised it as an ultrasound photo. There was a clear outline of a baby, one hand reaching up.

It was the best present Lucas had ever unwrapped.

-x-

Brooke had turned the opposite direction from her house when they left Haley and Nathan's, Noah immediately noticed, "this isn't the right way"

"I owe you a surprise"

The drive was not far, Brooke turned into their new house's driveway and parked. Noah had seen the house from the outside but had never been inside, he got out of the car and gave Brooke a sideways glance, "a whole house is an extravagant gift"

With a laugh Brooke ushered Noah forward, "don't be silly, the present is inside" she jogged ahead and unlocked the door, "come in"

Noah walked slowly, his eyes taking in everything he could see as he followed Brooke into the grand room, "happy birthday, Noah"

He stopped, unable to move, the grand piano was on display along the back windows, it was a moment before Noah stepped forward. Eventually Noah touched the keys, "it's a Steinway" he gave a little smile and pressed down on one key, then another.

"Do you like it?"

Noah gave a nod, his eyes still on the piano, "can I play it?"

"Of course," the room was empty except for them and the piano, Brooke sat down on the step, still slightly damp from the party. She crossed her legs to one side as Noah sat down on the small bench and started to play.

She had missed six birthdays and never wanted to miss another, Brooke listened, so lulled by the music she could almost fall asleep.

-x-

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	21. Chapter 21

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, and I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting.**

 **I would like to thank the amazing reviewers especially for your understanding of my late update, I did my best to find the time to knock out this chapter. It's not as long as perhaps hoped but I hop you enjoy it, though it may be an emotional one. Thanks to the guest reviews, there were some amazing comments and emotions. Also thanks to delphine05, WMC, k-pixy, brookelucasnoah, Ivonne, brucaslove, bjq, notrob, GH jasam fan, mirianschuaster1, new to brooke, brucas, lileen, princesakarlita411, dianehermans, breathbookslove and Callison.**

 **There were a few suggestions of song titles for last chapter however I am asking for more as I felt the chapter needed a more upbeat song though I've added some to my list for future chapters.**

Chapter Twenty-One

The huskier tenor of her own voice filled the room, _"I'm not ashamed of my son or the past. I'm not saying I would make the same choice if I could live my life again but I am no longer a scared teenager who felt alone in the world. There are so many mother's out there who have to make tough decisions and many don't realise it's love that has them go through nine months of pregnancy and giving birth only to hand all that joy over to another mother. I was that girl and through a twist of fate I have been given a second chance"_

" _The details of which are still a mystery. Would you shed some light on the reunion with your son?"_

" _I prefer not to dwell on it, I can lay blame or I can be thankful the mistakes that happened led me to discovering my son ag-"_

Brooke turned the TV off and Haley laughed at the sound Brooke made, "I thought the interview went well"

"It did it's job and got the media to back off" Brooke looked up from where she sat across from Haley. The two women were enjoying an afternoon together with their work, Brooke had her sketch book open as she worked on her next line and Haley was working on lyrics, "wanna play hooky?"

Haley laughed again, "you own your company and I'm… well I'm not sure what I am… either way we have no bosses to play hooky from"

"Perfect! Let's go out for lunch, I feel restless today" Brooke abandoned her designs and stood, Haley followed suit but packed away her things.

As they left the breakfast nook, Haley shook her head, "this big house and you still work in the kitchen"

Brooke gave a slight pout, "I've turned the library into a work room but some days it's too quiet in there, coffee is closer here too"

"Sure" Haley slung her bag over her shoulder, "where do you want to go for lunch"

"I don't know, days like this I wish Karen's was still here"

They left the house, Haley's mind on where they could go, she suggested a restaurant on the Riverwalk and Brooke nodded.

It had been a busy few weeks with school starting and Haley had felt strange not returning to the high school again. Haley's mind returned to the children at the thought of the school, "are you picking Noah up today?" she asked as they drove down the street.

"It's Luke's day. He wants to have Noah this weekend, first sleepover, with the baby coming next week Luke wants as much time with Noah as he can get because he won't get the quality time with Noah for a while the baby comes"

"Sounds like you guys are communicating well"

"We text" Brooke shrugged, "we can't ignore each other and it will be good for Noah to get used to the idea of staying at Luke's"

"It's good. Nathan and Lucas missed out on so much by not seeing each other when they were little"

Brooke agreed, she didn't want that for Noah and his sibling, her relationship with Lucas and Peyton shouldn't stop Noah from being able to be a big brother. Her mind turned to the two Scott men "imagine how cute a little Nathan and Lucas would have been playing basketball together"

"Imagine the trouble they would have gotten into" Haley smiled, her eyes wen dreamy "but I guess if things had been different we wouldn't be where we are now"

All Brooke could do was agree, even their mistakes and the mistakes of their parents had lines things up to where they all were now. Some things were just meant to happen even with the pain.

-x-

Peyton stood in the doorway as she watched Lucas, her husband was still unboxing things, a pile of rubbish in the middle of the room was only growing bigger. He finished making Noah's single bed, placing the pillow just so and Peyton rolled her eyes.

"It looks fine" she stared at the finished bed unable to help compare it to the empty crib on the other side of the room which had a wrapped mattress leaning against it.

"I hope they like it" Lucas smiled, he picked up a small stuffed lion toy with large amber eyes "Jamie gave me this for the baby" and he walked over to place it on top of the chest of drawers reserved for the baby.

Next Lucas grabbed a box and pulled out the mobile, he looked at it and placed it aside "remind me to wash the crib sheets tomorrow"

'Why not today?"

Lucas frowned, "why not tomorrow. The caesarean is a week away and besides we will be using the bassinet in our room anyway"

Peyton reluctantly dropped it, she crossed her arms, "okay, I'm going to go lay down"

For a moment Lucas looked at her, "okay, get some sleep" and watched as she walked away, he shook his head and then Lucas reached for the next box and pulled out the matching money boxes he'd gotten the kids. Full of happiness Lucas placed one on Noah's shelf next to his framed birth certificate and ultrasound photo and the other on the baby's shelf to the right just below the other one.

As Lucas turned around he saw how big the pile of rubbish had become, he collected it all up and carried it out to the bin. When Lucas stepped back inside he could hear his phone ringing, he took his time but frowned when he saw the caller ID, "hello?"

"Hi, am I speaking to Lucas Scott?"

"Yes. Is Noah alright?"

"That's why I'm calling. Noah has been involved in an accident at school, he has hit his head, the skin hasn't broken but we feel it best if a parent picks him up to take him home and monitor him"

"Sure, I will come get him"

"Thanks, Mr Scott"

Lucas gave his farewell and ended the call, his mind distracted he rushed to grab his keys and wallet, he was almost out the door when he remembered to let Peyton know he was going out.

"Hey babe" he said as he entered their bedroom and stopped when he saw Peyton was asleep, slowing down Lucas left a note on the bedside for Peyton and left her sleeping.

As he left his driveway Lucas put his phone on loudspeaker and called Brooke, "hi, Brooke, I got a call from the school. Noah's hit his head and they want me to pick him up early"

"Is he okay?" Lucas could hear the concern in Brooke's voice.

"Not sure. I thought I should bring him back to your house, if you don't mind I could stay with him there for a bit before I go home"

"Yes, that sounds good. I'm not home… I… uh… I went out with Haley" in the background Brooke asked Haley for as lift home.

Lucas reached a stop sign, "Brooke why don't I swing by and pick you up? I can hear the concern in your voice"

There was a long pause and then Brooke agreed, "I'm at the Riverwalk"

"I'll be there in a few minutes" Lucas was happy she had agreed, times like this was when they needed to work together and put any awkwardness aside.

When Lucas picked Brooke up she looked more stressed than he could remember ever seeing her, the drive to the school went by in an eerie silence.

As soon as they saw Noah waiting for them Brooke's demeanour softened, "hey, how are you feeling?"

"Tired" the boy mumbled.

Brooke frowned, brushing Noah's hair back, her voice deepened, "let's get you home then"

Lucas looked at the nurse waiting with Noah, "what exactly happened?"

"He slipped and hit his head. I recommend you take him to a doctor and keep an eye out for any signs of a concussion"

Lucas nodded and touched Noah's shoulder, "come on, buddy" and his eyes met Brooke's. Lucas gave a nod to her silent worry and bent down to pick Noah up, he didn't complain, his face falling against Lucas' shoulder and his arms wrapping around to cling to his father.

As if she could read his mind Brooke spoke allowed what Lucas was thinking, "he's not himself, I think we should take Noah straight to the doctors"

With care Lucas placed and buckled Noah into his car seat, Brooke immediately climbed in next to their son. They had driven only ten minutes when Brooke gasped, "Luke!" she screamed.

Lucas heard it as Noah started vomiting, "I know" he reassured Brooke, "we've got this, Brooke, I'll drive straight to the hospital. Noah's probably concussed"

"Can you drive faster?" she was only half joking. Fear like no fear that had ever filled her was rushing through Brooke, rationally Brooke knew Noah would be alright but rationality meant nothing to Brooke at the moment.

Hours later Brooke lay next to Noah on the hospital bed, "feeling better?"

"Yeah"

Lucas sat on the other side of Noah, a relieved smile on his face, "looks like you'll have some more time off school"

"I want to go home" he turned from Lucas to Brooke, Noah's eyes large. Lying on the hospital, glassy eyed and vulnerable Noah looked and sounded every bit the seven-year-old he was.

Brooke bit her lip, "the doctor thinks it's best, they want to monitor you overnight"

"You'll be home in no time" Lucas added when Noah turned those eyes to him, the colour was lighter but his eyes and brows were so much like Brooke's it made something twist in Lucas' stomach seeing Noah so unhappy, those eyes brought back memories of the past mingling it with the present.

Noah began to sit up, "I need the bathroom"

"Okay, sweetie" Brooke slipped off the hospital bed to give Noah the room to leave, when she was alone with Lucas she dragged her eyes from the closed door, "I know he will be fine but I have this sinking feeling inside my stomach that something bad is going to happen"

Forgetting that they weren't meant to be so close, Lucas wrapped his arms around Brooke, her cheek rested against his chest, she sighed and hugged him back taking the comfort as they both tried to let go of the worry that wouldn't shake them.

-x-

Hormones raging Peyton stared at the nursery, she had messaged Lucas twice in the last half an hour and received no reply, her husband had not come home yet and Peyton looked at the nursery with still so much left to do. Only a week to go, Peyton huffed and stepped forward, she ripped the plastic off the cot mattress and slipped the mattress into the cot.

It took Peyton a moment to lower the railing but then she went to retrieve the newly washed sheets she had done and quickly made the cot. The mobile was up, a few stuffed toys placed in, it didn't take Peyton long which made her anger burn at the thought Lucas hadn't found the time yet.

Next Peyton went to place the spare folded sheets, blankets and wraps away. The first drawer Peyton opened she found was already filled with tiny clothes and Peyton smiled, pleased that Lucas had already put away all the baby's clothes. Peyton eventually found a place for the wraps and then put the sheets and blankets in the blanket box.

Once that was done Peyton worked on placing the items Lucas had put in a small pile on the floor, she had already used some for the cot and then placed some toys in a chest and the rest of the stuffed toys on the top of the small bookshelf by the nursing chair.

With care Peyton removed the baby rocker and placed it in the living room, she added the play mat and a small box of toys to the baby corner she created and then returned to the nursey,

Satisfied Peyton placed her hands on her hips, she felt good, her body had done her well as she moved in ways she hadn't for weeks. For a moment everything appeared perfect, and then Peyton looked up towards the identical floating shelves up on the wall.

On the lower shelf there was an empty frame and on the other the frame Lucas had returned with after Noah's birthday party. Peyton hated it, she didn't understand why Lucas hadn't put it on his desk or in their bedroom, anywhere but in the bedroom her baby would sleep in. It was one simple thing Peyton hated about it, just looking at the birth certificate had Peyton's frustration bubble to the service. It was Brooke's name on it that had such strong emotions circling through Peyton, she did not want to have another's woman's name on display in _her_ baby's room. The last thing Peyton wanted was to look up when she was feeding her own child and see Brooke's name displayed with such honour.

Without thinking much of it Peyton went to get something to help her, the first thing Peyton saw was the broom, she held it and lifting it up carefully tried to knock the frame down ready to catch the offending object.

Peyton almost knock the money box and overcompensating to jerk away from the money box she knocked the frame straight off quicker than she had expected. The frame came flying down at Peyton's head and Peyton instinctively stepped back, her foot hit something, her ankle rolled and in slow motion Peyton found herself falling.

Hands frantically trying to break her fall Peyton landed on her side, her eyes widened, she breathed carefully waiting for something, anything. After a few minutes Peyton stood, she felt fine, she ran her hands over her stomach where her precious child rested and felt the reassuring kicks of her baby.

With a large puff of air Peyton sighed with relief as the nervous butterflies in her stomach disappeared.

Ten minutes later the pain hit. Peyton breathed through it, she walked through the house searching for her phone, a wetness between her legs made her gasp but Peyton kept going to she felt the relief of the phone in her hands.

The first number Peyton dialled was Lucas yet it rang out with no answer and with a swear word Peyton dialled 911, she was alone and scared and cursing everyone and herself. _Please, please, I'll do anything, just let me and my baby get through this._

-x-

It wasn't until Lucas offered to go get everyone a drink and snack that he realised he had left his wallet and phone in his car, and Brooke asked him to get her bag for her when he retrieved them.

Lucas walked as quick as he could, his mind on his mission when he heard his name being called as he neared the door, "Luke! Thank god you're here already" Nathan sounded frantic, "I knew Haley would reach you, come on" he grabbed Lucas' arm, "do you know what's happening with Peyton?"

A rush of alarm filled Lucas, "what do you mean? Where's Peyton?"

"You don't know?"

"I was here with Noah" Lucas became more frantic, "I forgot my phone, I was just getting it from my car, is Peyton alright? Is the baby alright?" his words melded together.

"I don't know, I detoured to the hospital when I got Peyton's call"

They were jogging by the time they reached emergency and they had been there only a few seconds when a familiar head of warm golden curls was wheeled in on a stretcher.

Lucas reached for Peyton's hand, "I'm here, I'm here. Everything is going to be okay"

"Sir, step away"

"Peyton's my wife" Lucas walked with them, his eyes met Peyton's wide and scared gaze, and she reached for his hand.

Their fingers were about to touch when Peyton was wheeled further away and Lucas was blocked from following, "your wife needs to an emergency caesarean and we need to help her, unfortunately you cannot be in there with her but someone will come talk to you as soon they can"

Nathan placed his hand on Lucas' shoulder as the blonde helplessly stood watching Peyton and their unborn baby disappear around a corner, leaving Lucas confused and scared.

It wasn't until Haley arrived that Lucas remembered the initial reason he came to the hospital, Haley took Lucas' keys and soon returned with his wallet and phone. In a daze Lucas took his things and then stared back in the direction Peyton had been taken.

Haley waited a moment before leaving Nathan and Lucas, she entered Noah's hospital room and Brooke immediately stood up, "Haley, what are you doing here?"

"Hi, Brooke, can we talk for a moment"

The tone of her voice and the expression on her face let Brooke know that something had happened, Brooke glanced at Noah, "I'll be just outside" and followed Haley out of the room, "what's going on?"

Haley handed Brooke her bag, "Peyton's here, she's having an emergency c-section. I don't know much but I know she was bleeding and called an ambulance"

"Oh my god" Brooke didn't know what to say, she covered her mouth in shock, "okay, you go back to them, let me know if you find out anything" and Brooke hugged Haley.

The feeling that had settled into Brooke's stomach rolled over, dread filled her.

-x-

Time moved around Lucas, people walked by him, Haley and Nathan talked to him, yet nothing processed. The world was a blur until Lucas heard Peyton's name and he stood, "I'm her husband" and fighting the urge to bite his fingernails Lucas followed the doctor.

When the doctor stopped again and faced Lucas he had a blank expression on his face that gave nothing away, and then he spoke, "your wife is in a stable condition, Peyton is still asleep at the moment and we will let her body heal a bit before we wake her up. She lost a lot of blood and a transfusion was needed but a full recovery is expected"

"And the baby?"

Something flickered in the doctor's eyes, "Were you informed Peyton had suffered from a placental abruption?" Lucas nodded at the question, he had been told not long after he'd seen Peyton wheeled away but nothing really made sense, the doctor continued, "What that means is the placenta had separated from the uterus, and when the placenta is compromised the foetus' supply of nutrients and oxygen is as well. By the time we were able to deliver the baby she had suffered asphyxia from lack of oxygen and was no longer breathing, we attempted to resuscitate her however our attempts were unsuccessful. The baby died, she was most likely dead before your wife reached the hospital"

"I'm sorry" Lucas mumbled, his hands going to the back of his head, "I'm sorry I don't understand how this happened" he looked around, "the baby died?"

"Yes"

Lucas licked his lips as everything sunk in, the doctors words went over in his head again, "it was a girl?"

"A little girl. You can see her, hold her, if you would like to?"

With a nod Lucas went with the doctor, the next room he was taken to felt cold but the cold came from inside Lucas as he saw the motionless, too quiet little body. They had wrapped her, she could be asleep if you didn't know better but the more Lucas looked at his daughter the more unnatural her state seemed.

He almost touched her but he pulled his hand back as the tears started, they fell until Lucas' body was dry and he didn't know if he could stand anymore but he didn't fall. Instead Lucas lifted his baby girl up and cradled her, the dreams of watching her grow faded away and the world seemed darker.

-x-

Waiting in their seats Nathan and Haley stood as soon as Lucas returned, they noticed the red eyes and pale skin, the slouch of his shoulders and their breaths hitched, their hopes dropping.

"Luke?" Haley asked.

Unable to say anything Lucas shook his head and the tears he thought were gone came again, Haley gasped and Nathan closed his eyes but they both went to hug Lucas pulling their brother in.

His shoulders shook, "the baby didn't make it" he sobbed and a long moment later, "my baby girl is gone" and Haley hugged him tighter.

Nathan was the one to ask about Peyton and Lucas pulled away, he wiped at his tears, and nodded, "she's going to be okay, yeah, she's going to be okay" he looked at them and then looked away, "how am I meant to tell her?"

"There's no right way" Haley rubbed Lucas' back and then with no other words to say she hugged her friend again.

-x-

The day had taken a dark turn and Brooke watched Noah sleeping, so young and innocent, and imagined losing him now with no hope of ever seeing him again. Even when Brooke had given birth and handed Noah over she had hope that one day, even if it was forty years in the future, she would see her son again. Brooke couldn't contemplate the idea Noah would just disappear with no chance of breathing the same air as him again. Just the thought caused an unbearable ache.

Her heart broke for Lucas and Peyton, guilt was under the grief and sadness, guilt that she was no longer the friend to be there for them. Brooked wanted to tell Peyton that nothing else mattered, she wanted to say so much, but it wasn't the words Brooke really wanted to say, all Brooke wanted to do was hold her friend's hand.

In the dark Lucas appeared in the doorway, Brooke knew he was there before he made any sound or before she turned to see him. Brooke could feel Lucas' presence as if his skin was touching hers but this wasn't the Lucas she knew. This broken man was a Lucas that Brooke had never seen before, not when Keith died, not at any other dark time in his life, something was missing.

"Hey" it wasn't enough but so many words unsaid went with that one word and Lucas couldn't cope with the emption in Brooke's voice and eyes.

"I just needed to see him" it was barely a whisper and Lucas stepped into the room.

Brooke got up, "of course, I'll leave you two alone"

He moved further into the room as Brooke left, she stopped at the door to look back and stared at his back. The urge to touch him, hug him, to just be there was so strong Brooke had to physically fight it, "I'm so sorry"

He didn't say anything but Brooke could see he nodded in acknowledgement and she left them alone. Lucas moved as close to the bed as he could, he say pulling the chair right next to the bed and touched Noah's skinny arm as he dropped his head.

Lucas needed to know that he still had something, a reason to live another day, some light amongst all the darkness that was fast consuming him. It had been a hard day and Lucas knew tomorrow would be harder, tomorrow would make it real.

-x-

Peyton's eyes opened and it took her a moment to catch up to the different surroundings, she looked around, eyes dancing around the room until she focused on one thing. _Lucas_ she tried to speak but her mouth was too dry, her hand moved but fell back down.

Slowly the fog of her mind disappeared, reality began to sink in, Peyton felt different; lighter, empty. Her hand moved to her stomach which was soft instead of hard. Peyton licked her lips and Lucas quickly gave her a cup with a straw and when Peyton felt like she could speak her words at first slurred and then when they came only one thing was on her mind, "the baby? Where's our baby?" Peyton tried to look around the room but her body didn't feel like her own.

Peyton began to smile, "is she a girl?" the last month she had started to feel so sure it was a girl, she wanted her baby, "where is she?" her voice grew stronger.

Slowly her smile faded as Lucas kept looking at her, his mouth went to open but instead his eyes went down and Peyton felt her heart drop, " _where is my baby?_ " she screamed though it broke in a cry.

"Peyton, I'm sorry-" Lucas began, his hand reaching out for her but Peyton moved hers away tried to turn away.

"No! No, don't you say it, don't you dare say it!"

"She didn't make it"

The scream had no sound, Peyton's body twisted, shooting back as if a force had collided with her and then the scream changed, the noise almost unhuman. The room became a blur of light, her ears rung drowning out all sound even her own scream, for Peyton her mind was on fire. And her arms and body were empty.

-x-

 **Please put your title suggestions in your review.**


	22. Somebody That I Used to Know

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, and I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting.**

 **I am deeply moved by the reaction of the last chapter and appreciate that many of you feel for Peyton despite your feelings for her. I've known from the beginning that the leyton baby was not going to survive the story but it took me a while to settle on the circumstances of the loss. I wanted it to ultimately stem from the chain of events started by the non-canon differences.**

 **I have mean meaning to respond to many reviews about Sam, and even I am going to miss her bigger presence in the fic. Sam and Brooke's relationship is my favourite storyline from season 6 and I even like the family unit they made with Julian. In the end though I thought it would be even less fitting in the circumstances for Sam not to give her biological mother a chance considering she has seen it play out with Noah and Brooke. I plan for Sam not to completely disappear though.**

 **I would like to thank the guests reviewers, as well as lovergurrl411, fish330, brucaslove, wmc, bjq, brookelucas, gh jasam fan, new to brooke, salazarjasam, notrob, callison, breathbookslove, k-pixy, delphine05, brookelucasnoah, lileen, dianehermans and princesakarlita411. I hope you are pleased with the quick update.**

Chapter Twenty-two

The clock was ticking, the infinite ticking that pounded through the house, it wouldn't stop. Peyton tried to go back to sleep but the day beckoned and a reluctant Peyton grabbed her pillow and threw it at the clock pulling it from the plug yet the ticking seemed to continue.

Waking up was one of the hardest parts of the day, the remembering and the emotions came in a rush or a trickle and Peyton never knew which one it would be.

It was two o'clock in the afternoon, Peyton still had no desire to get out of bed, after all she had nothing to do and nowhere to go.

Sometimes Peyton heard a baby crying in those moments between sleep and waking, and then the cries vanished and all the other sounds came. Peyton didn't know what was worse.

From another room Peyton could hear Lucas, she knew what he was doing today and she wanted no part of the process. They were each finding ways to cope, Lucas was doing his best to be there for Peyton filled with guilt that he had not been there the day everything had changed, and Peyton was trying to drown her own guilt that was an insistent buzzing telling her it was her fault. Yet it was the overwhelming grief and pain that weighed heavily on the childless parents.

The world was closing in on Peyton, she fluctuated between letting it crash against her and pushing everything and everyone away. When Lucas' footsteps neared Peyton closed her eyes even tighter, she kept her back to the door, and hoped he saw she was asleep and went away.

"Peyton" his voice quiet, soon his hand was on her shoulder, "Peyton, I don't know if I can do this, are you sure?"

Lucas sighed when he received no answer, he knew she was awake though he let her have her illusions and went back to the task she had given him.

Everything was being donated, from the cot to the clothes, still as Lucas packed away all the things Sawyer never got a chance to use he couldn't give it all away. Lucas glanced up at the empty doorway, he's separated a few items from the rest. Among them the outfit Sawyer had worn for the photos the hospital had arranged, photos that appeared no different to any other newborn shoot, the only clothes that had touched his little girl's skin except for what she was buried in. The matching stuffed toy to the one that had been placed in the tiny coffin with her, a gift from Noah so Lucas and Sawyer could always share something between them. He saved all the photos and the ultrasound images, he kept the pregnancy journal Peyton had kept, and last of all Lucas kept the blanket Sawyer had been wrapped in. With care Lucas packed them separately and hid them away in the attic where they were safe, hopeful for a day when he would not have to hide them away.

It was too much for Lucas, his body and soul were so sore from grief he had to get out of there, not caring what he wore Lucas left the house and started running, he ran as far as he could until he was on the verge of collapse and then he turned around and walked back to the place that no longer felt like a home.

When Lucas returned Peyton was in the doorway of the bedroom, she didn't turn around "why is it all still here?"

"I'm about to take it all down to the church" he paused, "are you sure you don't want to keep anything?" when there was no response Lucas walked closer and placed his hand on Peyton's shoulder, as soon as he touched her Peyton shrugged his hand away and stepped further into the bedroom.

Something snapped inside Peyton, she reached down and picked up the first thing she could find and threw it against the wall. The money box shattered and Lucas stood where he was staring at the pieces scattered on the floor, Peyton breathed heavily and quickly grabbed another item from the same box, this time a ceramic bookend and soon it too was flying through the air at the wall and ended up laying in four pieces around the room, and Lucas grabbed Peyton's wrist before she got a chance to throw the third item that was clasped tightly in her fist.

"I'll take it all away" voice calm Lucas held Peyton's wrist with one hand while he used the other to uncurl her fingers and take the night light away, "okay, I'll take it all away"

"Good" Peyton nodded and quickly left the room.

Lucas looked at the mess that had been created, the broken pieces on the floor and the dents in the wall, yet Lucas knew the true mess was what was unseen.

-x-

As much as Peyton wanted to avoid the room she had to walk by it sometimes. Lucas often left the door open and Peyton would close it every time she had to catch a glimpse of what was inside, it was one door she could close.

Nothing was left of Sawyer's within the four walls however Peyton was now faced with how the room had gone from a nursery where her baby was meant to sleep to all traces of that dream disappearing and Noah's things spread around waiting to welcome the boy. Peyton closed the door for what felt like the hundredth time, her body and mind ached, she couldn't breathe inside the house.

Peyton didn't bother to shower before she left, driving around town no place called to her, she stopped off at Tric and went upstairs to her office yet within five minutes Peyton felt itchy all over and wanted to climb out of her skin. She couldn't escape her life or her grief.

Nowhere offered comfort or answers so Peyton drove, she drove until she reached a familiar bridge and before she knew if Peyton found herself sitting under it, her thoughts a hole of darkness.

It was night time before Brooke appeared and sat down next to her, no words were spoken, Brooke just sat and looked out at the distance her warmth there for the taking. Peyton let the tears fall and when Brooke's arms wrapped around her Peyton buried her face into her oldest friend's chest and let herself be held.

Eventually Brooke wrapped a blanket around Peyton and managed to get the blonde into her car, Brooke drove Peyton to Lucas' and parked in the driveway. Peyton didn't move, her eyes stared unseeing at the floor of Brooke's car.

When Peyton's voice came it was meek, "it was my fault"

"It wasn't your fault. Some things just happen and it's not anyone's fault"

"I wanted too much" Peyton began to shake her head, "I loved her, you know, I loved her too much so she was taken away. Like Mom, like Ellie, everyone I love has to leave, but this was my fault, _my fault_ " her ramblings became almost uncoherent, "I killed my baby"

" _No_ , you didn't." Brooke grabbed Peyton's chin and forced her to look at her but Peyton wouldn't meet her eyes, "you are not God and you are certainly not responsible for everyone who dies or leaves. And It doesn't feel like it right now but you are Peyton Sawyer and you will get through this"

Peyton looked up, "you don't understand…"

"I know your heart, P. Sawyer and you loved your baby, you didn't kill her"

The door opened and the light on the porch turned on, Lucas stood in the doorway grateful that Brooke had found Peyton after everyone had spent all day looking for his wife.

Peyton looked at her husband's silhouette, "this isn't my home" she whispered, "please take me home"

Confused Brooke didn't know what to do, she didn't start the car and her lips parted. What home was Peyton after she did not know but there was a look in her friend's eyes that scared Brooke.

The car door opened and Lucas gently pulled Peyton out of the car, "thanks" he mumbled before lifting Peyton up. Her body was cold so Lucas forced Peyton into a warm shower, propping her up, and then dressed her and laid her in bed.

She could have been asleep for how docile she was but Peyton's green eyes were wide open, seeing nothing. With care Lucas tried to hold Peyton but she moved just an inch away letting him know his touch was unwelcome, instead Lucas sat at the end of the bed.

There might have well been an ocean between them, Lucas stood and left to go to the couch. He spread out on the cold surface and covered himself with the blanket that was resting over the top. Sleep came easier than he thought and the sun was only just rising when Lucas woke to the sound of things crashing, startled Lucas jumped up following the screaming to Noah's room, it was in disarray, furniture overturned, books ripped, wallpaper ripped off the walls and a pale Peyton on a war path.

Lucas ran forward wrapping his arms around Peyton to prevent her committing more damage or hurting herself, "Peyt, Peyton… breathe"

"LET GO OF ME!" Peyton used every ounce of her skinny limbs to escape Lucas, she pushed him away, her chest falling and rising as she huffed, "don't touch me!" she picked up a book at threw it at him, "you should have been here, you should have been here with us" her voice broke as grief, pain and guilt collided. Peyton threw all her pain at Lucas, in that moment she hated him but she hated herself even more, "get away from me!"

The tears fell from Lucas, he fell to his knees, taking the hits as Peyton began to punch him with each punch becoming softer and softer as both their cries grew.

Eventually the hits stopped and they leant against each other, they didn't embrace or seek comfort from the other, "I know" Lucas replied, "I know".

When everything calmed Lucas lifted Peyton and once again carried her to bed, this time he forced her to take his hug and the two of them remained there until the pillows were soaked with their tears and sleep found Peyton again.

After an hour of silence Lucas finally let Peyton go and went to work with quick determination, by the time Peyton woke Lucas sat at the kitchen table with two packed suitcases, she walked into the room with red rimmed eyes that grew large at the waiting sight, "what's going on?"

"I've booked us flights to go spend a few weeks with your father"

Peyton gave a sigh of relief and eight hours later she finally felt home as her father's arms wrapped around her.

-x-

As the weeks went Peyton began to feel new and then the eventual return date to Tree Hill grew closer and Peyton began to feel the world closing in on her again.

Lucas walked into the spare room they shared and found Peyton sitting cross-legged on the bed, his laptop in front of her, he walked behind her to collect his phone from the charger and caught a glimpse of the webpage Peyton was looking at.

"You looking at houses?" he frowned.

Peyton closed the laptop and turned around, "I can't go back, Luke"

He sighed, having half expected this, he had known for weeks, even months, that they were walking a tightrope on the brink of falling.

Then Peyton smiled, her smile was no longer the same as it used to be but there was a glimmer of the old Peyton that had slowly began to resurface on occasion in the last few weeks. It had been over two months since they first left and Lucas had returned for Christmas alone and dutifully left again, and seeing Peyton's smile Lucas knew this was the right thing. They had to heal, they couldn't keep going the way they were.

Peyton's smile didn't reach her eyes, "we could sell the other house and get something even better here, start over, the two of us could-"

"Just pretend nothing ever happened?" Lucas was shocked.

A flash of anger lit Peyton's eyes, "I will never forget" she uncrossed her legs and climbed off the bed, "but I'll be damned if I build a life over her grave. I can't breathe there"

Unsure if he was understanding correctly Lucas asked, "you want us to start over?"

"Would that be such a bad thing, Luke?"

"We're drowning, Peyton, we're drowning and-"

"I'm reaching for a life boat. Tree Hill is where everything bad has happened, I can't go back to that house"

"It's my home" he stated.

Peyton waited a moment, "you look in that room and see the future, all I see is an empty crib. Everything is a reminder, a yard where she will never run, a table where she will never sit, a home without my little blonde baby girl, and I can't live like this, I can't live in the shadow of what could have been. It's killing me, every second there kills me"

"We can move somewhere else, nearer to Nathan and Haley" he began not sure why he suggested it.

"It's not just the house, it's everything!" Peyton shouted, her eyes pleaded "we could leave and find a new home here, one with only happy memories and no shadows"

"I can't leave" his voice grew strong.

"Why not! Nothing is stopping us" Peyton smiled again, "can you honestly tell me being there doesn't hurt? That you don't see the ghosts of Sawyer and Keith and everything else bad that's ever happened?"

Lucas went to answer but he closed his mouth and Peyton stepped forward her hands reached for his but Lucas stepped back and held his hands up, "of course it hurts but it's not all bad memories" he shook his head, "I have Noah and-"

Peyton flinched, her voice pained "you could visit him and he can come stay with us"

"I don't want to" the words hung between them and Lucas ran his hands through his hair, "Tree Hill is my home, it's where my family is, where Noah is. I will do anything to make this easier for you but I can't leave Tree Hill, I don't want to, I missed out on six years of Noah's life and I want to go back"

Something in Peyton twisted, "why is it so difficult! I am asking just one thing"

"No, you are not, moving away from everything is not just one thing, it's everything. And Peyton, you're asking me to choose between you and my son. Can't you see how unreasonable that is?" he stood there waiting for Peyton to see it from his point of view but she just stood there staring at him until she turned away and left the room, slamming the door behind her.

-x-

The flight home was silent, Lucas hadn't been sure Peyton would join him until they'd stepped foot on the plane together. The taxi took them back to his house and Lucas put his suitcase on top of the bed, Peyton hadn't entered the room and he found her sitting on the couch staring at everything in the room, "you should go see Noah" Peyton told Lucas without looking at him, hey eyes moved to the framed photograph of their wedding day.

It felt strange, Lucas gave a nod, "okay" he didn't fight it because he'd been wanting to see Noah from the moment he'd last said goodbye to his son.

Peyton slowly span her head around, her golden curls framing her face, she looked different, lighter, and Lucas smiled at her. Peyton smiled back, "Lucas, I'll see you later"

"See you later, Peyton" and he left, with just his keys, phone and wallet Lucas hopped in his car and went straight to Brooke's house.

When the door opened Noah stood there, his little face appeared surprised and then Noah closed the distance between them and hugged Lucas' stomach. Lucas lowered himself to hug Noah back, he closed his eyes and buried his face in his son's hair, amazed how much Noah had grown already and if he didn't know better Lucas would say his heart had skipped a beat.

"You're home" Noah stated as they finally released each other, and Lucas nodded with a slightly sad grin.

"For good this time. I missed you so much"

"I missed you too" Noah stepped back inside the house to let Lucas in and then shouted, "Mom, it's Dad! He's back" he went to leave, almost running but then Noah stopped and turned back to Lucas, he held out his hand for his father.

This is what Lucas needed, he took the hand on offer and knew that this was the right home for him. Lucas looked up from where their hands were joined and saw Brooke standing there watching them.

Her hair was longer and back to her natural dark brown, perhaps she was skinnier, but as their eyes met Lucas didn't notice anything different about her, all her saw was everything he knew. He took a deep breath and the air was fresher than it had been while he was away. The sun shone brighter on Tree Hill that the seaside town that he'd just left.

Noah held on to Lucas' hand pass Brooke and all the way into the grand room over to his piano, "I have been writing, like you suggested, to help me think" Noah creased his brow unsure of his wording. Noah was not used to dealing with such strong emotions especially ones of sadness or watching others express it either. He had known he was sad and he now recognised he was happy that Lucas was here, Noah wanted to try to make his father happier too because he could tell Lucas was still very sad.

As Lucas sat next to Noah, the boy let his fingers do the talking, the song began with a hopeful tune which began to turn whimsical, though as the joy and pitch rose there was a sudden dip and a sense of sadness filled the notes before coming back to the first notes flirting with the sadder ones. Lucas watched Noah's finger move and then they stopped, the boy's head was down and Lucas briefly leant against Noah's head, "that was beautiful"

"I've called it _Sawyer's Lullaby_ "

Lucas' heart swelled, he thought he'd never feel lucky again but then Noah's green eyes met his and Lucas was reminded that life gave you second chances.

-x-

After four hours with Noah the world didn't feel as tilted for Lucas, it was an escape in a way leaving Tree Hill hadn't been. Leaving had been for Peyton, it had calmed the storm inside her and that had raged around her here, though for Lucas it had only numbed him, his time away had felt like he'd been sleepwalking and now he was beginning to wake again.

Noah hugged Lucas goodbye and Lucas headed back to his house, he walked inside and closed the door behind him. The silence didn't hit Lucas until he took another step inside and the stillness hit him.

Something was different, something had changed, though Lucas couldn't quite name what it was. It was almost as if everything had just shifted an inch to the side, or Lucas was looking at his house in a game of spot the difference.

Lucas walked through the house, he finally opened his bedroom door. His suitcase was gone, Lucas had left it on the bed and now his belongings were neatly placed there but the suitcase itself was gone. Hangers were around the room and Lucas quickly walked to the wardrobe, and then the chest of drawers, and then Lucas checked the bathroom.

It was all gone. All Peyton's things were missing, from her toothbrush to her records, and Lucas did another walk through the house. There was no note, no message, no trace of Peyton and as the reality set in Lucas felt a weight fall from his shoulders.

A sound broke free from his throat, it started with a chuckle and then Lucas found himself laughing, his shoulders shook with it. It grew louder and tears came from the corners of Lucas' eyes, and when the laughter stopped Lucas was left with just the silence of an empty house and the ticking of a clock.

Lucas wished he could say he was surprised, he shook his head at the thought, nothing surprised him anymore.

Meanwhile at the border of the town Peyton felt the wind in her hair, the trunk was full, and even though it was a cloudy day she wore her sunglasses as the comet drove out of town leaving Tree Hill behind her.

-x-

 **Bye Peyton! *waves slowly***

 **This chapter isn't that long but I wanted to get it out tonight. I leave on holiday tomorrow, I'm off to celebrate my birthday in style, and the next chapter might be a bit late as I won't have time to write til after I get back and to be honest I don't know how it'll go. Last weekend I started having problems with one of my hands, I'm waiting some results and it's a bit of a mystery wants causing the pain at the moment but my doctor told me to rest my hand and not do any typing. I'm not so good at following rules. I really wanted to finish this chapter and get it out though because between my hand drama and going away I don't know when I will get another chance, so once this is up I'll be a good girl and listen to my doctor. Catch you on the flip side.**


	23. Unsteady

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, and I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting.**

 **Okay, feel free to yell at me. This took way longer to get out than even I expected. As Christmas approached, I was like that's it I'll upload it Christmas Eve but well… I didn't. It's been crazy! But I've managed to make this a happy new year update instead. So happy holidays OTHers! Enjoy this update.**

 **Thanks to all the reviewers and those who got on my back to update ; )**

 **Cheers to the guest reviewers and DJ, B4C, K-PIXY, WMC, BJQ, BROOKELUCASNOAH, GH JASSAM FAN, BREATHBOOKSLOVE, NEW TO BROOKE, MORGANELOVE98, LILEEN, DIANE, NOTROB, and DEPLHINE05.**

Chapter Twenty-Three

The house was dark, eerily quiet, a shadow of what Lucas had thought that his future in his home would be. Every day felt familiar, too familiar, as Lucas followed the same routine with one menial task followed by another, the only break from the painful mundane was his time with Noah.

Everyone had tried to be there for Lucas, he appreciated their care yet the look in their eyes, that guarded pity or worry, served only as a reminder. Lucas didn't need a reminder, he would live forever with the knowledge of his daughter's death, the haunting of the life that could have been with no memories to help dull the grief. That was painful in itself, mourning a child you never got a chance to even know, yet Lucas would never forget her, his angelic Sawyer.

One day turned to the next, Lucas cleaned and exercised, he spent time with his friends though not as much as he used to, his writing continued as the pain and grief inspired a darker side of him, and he ate when he remembered. The fridge and freezer were filled by meals made my others, and if he went a couple of days without seeing one of his friends there would eventually be a knock on his door.

As if on cue, there was a knock at the door and Lucas let Nathan in, his brother handed over a casserole dish with a wry smile, "from Haley" and Lucas added it to the others before grabbing a beer for both of them.

They clinked their bottles and moved out to the porch, there were a few silent minutes, Nathan watched Lucas until finally Lucas rolled his eyes, "go ahead, ask"

"You okay?"

"As well as can be expected" Lucas answered, he found it frustrating how everyone wanted to ask him how he was feeling yet knew it was easier to get it out of the way otherwise the question would hover between them, "you guys don't need to worry about me so much"

"We just want you to know we're here, I don't like the idea of you alone here all the time" Nathan paused for a moment, "you heard from her yet?" Nathan lifted his brow in question.

"Nope" Lucas popped, "I talked to Larry so I know she's safe"

"How is that not driving you insane!" Nathan licked his lips, less calm than Lucas, "you know we are all waiting for you to explode"

Lucas sat down on the bench along the wall, he sighed, "after we lost Sawyer, a part of me broke, but I felt that I had to hold everything together because Peyton was falling apart. Peyton's grief suffocated mine, it wasn't just the grief though." He looked up at Nathan, "when I came home and realised Peyton was gone, I wasn't angry or even upset," Lucas gave a sad smile "I was relieved".

For a moment Nathan just looked at his brother and then he let his breath go and relaxed.

Lucas took a moment to have some more beer, and began again, "I knew it was coming, that eventually we'd be healed enough to survive that conversation, and I'll admit I thought I would be the one to say the words" he gave a humourless chuckle and took another swig, "I didn't want to say it, Peyton didn't want to hear it - problem solved"

"Maybe that was a conversation you both needed"

"And say what?" Lucas became more animated, he leant forward over his knees with his eyes intently on Nathan, "that we failed, that everyone was wrong and everyone was right? We tried so hard to be right for each other, to fit ourselves into these neat little boxes we were so convinced our lives were meant to be, and despite everything… we wanted the same thing, we _wanted_ our girl. I wanted Sawyer _so badly_ , I wanted to be the best dad I could be, to just love her. I could do that right. And then she was gone, and all our hopes and dreams went with her, everything holding us together through the confusion. Everything becomes so small after that… so no, Nathan, that's a conversation neither one of us needed, we didn't need the words to be said aloud. I was relieved, I no longer had to worry about that. And now Peyton's emotions aren't suffocating me and I can… I can…" Lucas licked his lips, "it's my turn to mourn" and the tears fell, shattering Lucas' composure and Nathan waited only a beat before wrapping an arm around his brother.

-x-

The chill in the air had Brooke wrap her arms around herself, she stood under the tree in her backyard and looked out at the river. It had risen with the rain from the past week, its surface rougher and more dangerous, another strong breeze swept by and Brooke's teeth began to chatter. With one last questioning glance at the river Brooke returned to the warmth of her house.

It was quiet inside and Brooke followed the steps to the second floor, she could hear the music from Noah's room, it's soft melody soothing and when she reached his room Brooke found Noah at his desk writing in one of his journal's. Unable to stop herself Brooke didn't speak, she simply watched Noah as he sat so peacefully working, he wasn't just writing she quickly noticed that her son was sticking photographs on the paper too.

After a few minutes Brooke took a step into the room, "hey, what are you working on?"

"It's all the animals Dad and I find on our walks, I am cataloguing them"

Brooke looked over Noah's shoulder and smiled, she couldn't resist running her hands through his hair, an act so instinctual she no longer noticed when she did it. Noah's hair had darkened significantly since they had first met, it now was only one shade lighter than Brooke's colouring, he was noticeably taller too, small changes compared to how much more open the child had become.

"I want to show him this weekend" Noah smiled. _Did he sound older?_ Brooke wondered, there was an ease to his voice that hadn't been there a year ago, Brooke smiled back.

"He will love it" she kissed the top of his head, "I'm going to go start dinner" Brooke left the room and jogged down the staircase, once she was in the kitchen Brooke resisted the urge to grab her phone and instead focused on what she told Noah she was going to do.

With pasta boiling and the sauce ready Brooke turned to her phone again. It had become a physical pain attempting to stay away, the small moments Brooke allowed herself were all consuming, she bit her lip staring at her phone before sighing and pushing it away on the counter. In a rough jerk Brooke turned her back on it, stirring dinner before giving in and grabbing her phone again.

"Hi" the one word came with so many questions, Brooke's brow creased in the heart beat she waited, she could hear his breathing.

And then it came, "hi" Lucas said back and Brooke smiled. It was the way he said it that said everything and happy that she had called him Brooke turned the stove of and leant into the counter as she talked.

"So, I have been thinking and I'm wondering how you would feel about trying weekends with Noah again?" Brooke quickly added on "if you're ready that is, I completely underst-"

"Brooke. Thank you, I would love that" and she could hear the smile in his voice, "this weekend?"

"Yeah, sounds good"

They broke into a silence until Brooke finally nodded, "great, I can drop him off to yours Friday at five"

"See you then"

"Bye, Luke" she pressed end call and placed her phone down carefully, a weight lifted from her shoulders.

Friday came faster than Brooke anticipated, she parked her car and heard Noah's door slam before the engine even stopped running. Noah had changed after school and he carried his school bag over one shoulder, his body bundled up, Brooke tucked his jacket tighter around his neck and patted Noah's back, he rushed to the front door which opened before either one of them reached it.

Lucas waited with a wide grin that reached his eyes, the crinkles at the side of his age drew Brooke's attention, and she tugged a stray strand of hair behind her ear, "he's full of energy for you, I made sure to give him lots of sugar"

Noah rolled his eyes and sent his father a look, "she did not"

"I tried" she winked and Brooke's eyes met Lucas, she tilted her head to one side and her right brow kinked slightly. Lucas took Noah's bag from him and held his son's shoulder, his eyes not leaving Brooke's as he gave a nod, Brooke sent her ex a slight smile and nodded back, "I'll leave you Scott boys to it then"

"Brooke" Lucas stopped her as she stepped forward to kiss Noah goodbye, "why don't you join us for dinner?"

Her breath caught in her throat, Brooke looked to her right for a moment and then to Noah and Lucas who watched her with identical expressions,

"Say yes, Mom" Noah's face had lit up and Brooke struggled to answer, she met the glint in Lucas' eyes and narrowed her gaze at him.

"That sounds… great".

Brooke followed Lucas and Noah inside, unsure where to look, the house had transformed into the past, reminding Brooke of the time she spent there when she had Angie, yet still there was a sense of empty space to the house that used to feel so homely.

She stayed close to Noah and stayed in the hallway as he placed his school bag near his bed, there was nothing in the room that spoke of the nursery that was never used and an overwhelming sense of sadness filled Brooke. It hit her sometimes what her friends had gone through, it was so crushing in those seconds Brooke had no idea how they could live through it.

There was no anger in Brooke for Peyton, all she had for her lost friend was empathy and love, everything else was forgotten. Turning Brooke almost bumped into Lucas, she stepped away, her feelings for the brooding blonde far less simple.

For every inch of Brooke that needed to be there for Lucas another part of her knew that was a dangerous path with consequences she was not ready for.

They both tried to walk around the other, stopping two times as they both went in the same direction, Lucas chuckled and stood still, lifting his hand to tell her to walk by.

Her side brushed his arm and Brooke gave an almost indiscernible jump while Lucas froze, a warmth of tingle rushed through them both and Lucas snatched his arm away and stepped into Noah's room his eyes not meeting Brooke and she released a sharp breath and escaped to the bathroom.

Five minutes later Noah went looking for his mother and asked her to help him set the table, and as they did so with Lucas cooking a metre away it felt strangely familiar to the group, Lucas asked Noah how his day was and they fell into a natural rhythm. The eyes and the words came easy, Brooke made sure they didn't accidentally touch again, and by the time dinner ended she could almost forget why this was so dangerous, why it was so wrong.

It was a stark reminder when Noah hugged Brooke goodbye and Brooke was left to farewell Lucas, the two adults eyes met again, nothing in the way of the pull between them except Brooke could see how tired Lucas was by the strain in his eyes, Brooke could see the pain in the way he held his jaw, and the familiar lost expression she knew was hidden beneath the show of strength.

And Brooke knew how easy it would be to help Lucas, she knew she could help him find something and Brooke felt her heart twist inside her, for Brooke also knew she would lose a part of herself in the process.

With a step back Brooke began to turn away, "bye, Luke".

-x-

Saturday night at Tric was loud, while it rained outside the band inside and the dancers kept the club hot, the air thick with body heat. It was strangely ironic to Brooke that she had been the one dragged out by Haley and Millie, they had insisted that she needed to go have fun, the type of fun that didn't include a seven-year-old and being a mom.

It didn't feel the same though, Brooke had a good time with their girl's night but there was something inside her that she wanted to shake off, she tried to forget the world with dancing and with more alcohol than she'd had in a year but the feelings inside her lingered prominently still.

Haley was the first to leave, joining Nathan with a look in her eyes that Brooke recognised so she pushed her friend away with a laugh and told Haley to have a good night with a wiggle of her eyebrows and then Millie left to go home to Mouth and Brooke sighed.

In her position at the bar Brooke regretted her choice at heels that were starting to kill her feet and eyes the bottles wondering what drink she would have next.

Brooke's hazel eyes were still making a decision when the bartender placed a shot in front of her, "thanks Chase" Brooke took the shot but Chase shook his head and pointed to Brooke's left.

A blonde man in his twenties moved from his spot further down the bar with a matching shot and stood next to Brooke, "hi"

"Well, hello" Brooke smirked and together they downed their shots, Brooke lifted her hand "Chase, two more"

Soon they were three shots down each, "first name basis with the bartender?"

"Actually, we dated in high school" Brooke shrugged one shoulder.

"Small town"

"I don't think I've seen you here before" Brooke knew her tone had long turned flirtatious, she eyed the blonde, he was tall, over six foot and she guessed around the same height as Nathan and a little taller than Lucas, he wasn't as lean or toned at the Scott's and Brooke mentally shook her head as she started to compare the stranger to Lucas. They were both good looking, both fair haired and light eyed, Brooke took another shot as her comparison continued.

"I'm here on business" he told her, "I'm hoping to represent a rising Tree Hill sports star" it was clear he was hoping to impress Brooke.

Inwardly she laughed, "sounds like you know people"

"I don't know you" he leant forward, "but I'd like to. I'm Clay"

"Hi Clay" she leaned in, "so what important person has brought you to Tree Hill"

"Nathan Scott" Clay grinned and then saw the look of familiarity in Brooke's eyes, "heard of him?"

"Like you said, it's a small town" she turned the conversation back to Clay but he wasn't interested in talking about work, he held out his hand and eyed the dance floor.

Brooke placed her hand in his and returned to the dance floor, minutes later Clay pulled her closer until their bodies were flush against each other and Brooke wrapped her arms around his neck, their lips brushed and Brooke was finally distracted from everything that she had been trying to shake off that night.

With a hand on his chest Brooked pashed Clay away and started walking away, she turned her head back and kinked her brow, "you coming?".

-x-

It was just after seven when Lucas woke, he stretched his arms out before rolling out of bed, the sound of rain added an ambience of calm to the dim morning. The house remained otherwise quiet, Lucas turned on the coffee machine before looking out the window.

Dark clouds filled the sky, in the distance a flash of lightning cracked and Lucas stared for a moment before he went to check on Noah. The door to the bedroom was slightly open, Lucas gave a soft knock and waited for any sound of a reply, the boy gave a quick "yes?" and Lucas opened the door wider.

Noah lay on his side still under his covers, his lamp on by his bed and a book open next to him, "good morning" Lucas Smiled, "you ready for breakfast?"

"Okay" Noah closed his book and slipped out of bed, when he followed Lucas out of the room Noah was wearing his robe and slippers. His brown hair was in need of another haircut, Noah brushed it to the side and entered the kitchen a step ahead of his father.

"Can we have eggs?"

"Sounds good. You can help me" Lucas grabbed two frypans and began to heat them as he told Noah what to grab. They stood side by side, Noah standing on the small stepping stool left over from when his mother used to need a little extra height for the top shelves.

"Watch out for shell" Lucas gently laughed as he scooped some shell from the bowl Noah was using to crack eggs, their eyes met and Noah smiled back at Lucas before concentrating on his task. They worked together in unison, Lucas watching over Noah as he used the knife, and held the frypan as Noah started cooking the omelette.

Lucas set the table as Noah poured them each a juice, and then father and son sat across from each other. It was quiet but peaceful, towards the end of the meal Lucas pushed his plate slightly away, he took a last swallow, "what grand adventures shall we go on today?"

For a moment Noah looked out the window, a light in his eyes and when he looked back at his father Lucas gave a sigh and a nod, "we'll see if the weather gets better" Lucas said and then smiled at the glimmer in Noah's eyes.

Noah offered to fill the dishwasher while Lucas went and got ready for the day, it only took Lucas fifteen minutes to have a quick shower and slip on his clothes, last of all Lucas pulled his knitted cream sweater over his head and walked through the house in his thick socks. Noah had already finished with the dishwasher and had left the kitchen, after a quick clean of the table and counters Lucas went in search for Noah.

The seven-year-old had already gotten dressed for the day and was setting up Lucas' chess board at the coffee table. It felt almost surreal to Lucas, this weekend with his son, waking up knowing Noah was in his home and going through the day at a leisurely pace without worrying about when he'd be taking Noah home again.

For the first time Lucas really felt like he had the chance to be a father, to get to know his son in a way only a parent can.

They spent the morning playing chess and scrabble before Noah went to play in his room while Lucas spent some time writing. After lunch Lucas looked at the grey sky, the air carried the scent of rain though it hadn't showered for a few hours, "come on, Noah, go put your coat and boots on" Lucas grabbed his own coat and got ready, "do you have your camera?" he asked as Noah came ready to go.

"I left it at Mom's" Noah shook his head.

Lucas brushed his hand through Noah's hair as the boy stopped near him, "do you want to go pick it up?"

"No, that's alright, I will remember next time"

"Okay" Lucas opened the front door and Noah left running for the car, with a laugh Lucas locked his house happy to get out with his son.

-x-

The ringing of the doorbell woke Brooke, she groaned and covered her head with the pillow. The ringing came again, she rolled over and Brooke smiled as she stretched out as far as she could. Contentment rolled through Brooke's body, sinking down her veins, into her muscles and bones.

Brooke woke feeling warm, after a moment Brooke slipped out of bed and grabbed her silk robe, tying the sash around her waist to cover her body Brooke made her way to her front door. After looking through the peep hole Brooke made sure she smiled, "good morning"

"It's one o'clock in the afternoon" Haley rolled her eyes though she chuckled as Brooke let her and Jamie in, "did you just get out of bed?"

"Yes" Brooke smirked and Haley did a double take, she sent her friend a knowing look and sent Jamie out the back to play before raising her brow at Brooke.

"Do I take it you weren't alone in bed?" her lips popped.

Brooke moved away from the entrance, she headed to her room with Haley following, as they walked through her doorway Brooke looked backwards, "you're the one who said I needed to have fun".

It had been five in the morning when Brooke had stumbled home and into her shower before collapsing onto her bed, exhausted and still slightly drunk.

"And I needed it" Brooke let out a sigh.

Haley averted her eyes when Brooke dropped the robe and started to dress, "I'm just surprised. I thought you weren't looking for a relationship?"

"I'm not" Brooke replied with confidence. She slipped on her sweater last and ran her hands through her wavy hair, Brooke span back to Haley, "right now falling in love is the last thing I need or want" she sent her friend an earnest look "but god it felt good to have some fun".

Together they walked towards the back of the house to find Jamie. Haley frowned, "but what do you even know about this guy?"

"That's the point, Haley, it doesn't matter" Brooke opened the door to the back and stepped outside. She breathed in the cold air, Brooke walked to the deck railing and leant over, her eyes found Jamie on the trampoline before she looked at Haley. The other woman's brow was creased in concern and Brooke sent Haley a smile, "he's the type of guy who isn't going to ask any questions or expect breakfast in the morning, when I left his house after a couple of hours there were no complications or promises."

"And you want that?"

"It's all I can handle at the moment" Brooke rolled her eyes, "I have to move on from…" Brooke let her sentence roll away and averted her eyes from Haley's knowing gaze.

Haley waited a moment and then covered Brooke's hand, "are you moving on or trying to run away?"

Brooke laughed, "from what?"

"Now that Peyton's gone-"

"That has nothing to do with it" voice sharp Brooke gave a shake of her head.

Haley didn't believe it, "there's no buffer between you and Lucas now. Can you really tell me that this has nothing to do with you trying to build up walls around your heart to protect yourself from Lucas and the way he makes you feel?"

Unable to speak Brooke swallowed and a small smile appeared on Haley's lips, "maybe this isn't the time for running away from him, maybe it's finally time to run to him. There's nothing-" Haley tried to be compassionate but Brooke stopped her again.

"He just lost his wife and daughter, Haley, this isn't the time for any sweeping declarations of love"

"That's true" Haley nodded, "but maybe its not time to force yourself to move on either"

"I'm not forcing anything, I'm just living my life. I can't be on hold forever, I feel like I've been stuck since high school"

Their conversation ended when the sky cracked and rain began to pour, Jamie came running back to the house joining Haley and Brooke, he hugged his aunt who used the boy as a way to change the subject, "you look like you need a hot chocolate" and Brooke carried Jamie back inside.

-x-

After a moment Noah tilted his head as he watched the father and son kick a ball between each other, the seven-year-old didn't understand the point of kicking a ball to another person and though he could see them smiling Noah could not see how the action could cause pleasure. He turned away and Noah looked at his own father, Lucas walked along with Noah as they discussed nature and the world around them, the boy smiled and was thankful that his father didn't make him kick balls for he found their walks and discussions much more appealing.

There was something about the river that calmed Noah, he felt something when he looked at the beauty around him and Noah could almost forget that he hadn't always known this spot. It was a sense of belonging, similar to how Noah felt when Brooke hugged him or Lucas sent him a lazy smile.

When Lucas stepped away to answer a phone call, Noah's mind wandered to the river. He watched the lone boat makes its way through the currents, it looked so small upon the river.

"Noah" Lucas called, "not so close to the edge, stay away from the rocks"

A quick nod from Noah let Lucas know he'd heard him, then Noah began to walk slowly further down their path his eyes still on the little boat heading towards the docks on the other side of the river. Lucas kept an eye on Noah as he talked to his editor on the phone, slowly following Noah as the boy walked ahead until Noah stopped to look out at the river, Lucas smiled as he talked and came to stop a few metres away from his son.

The boat was nearly docked when Noah heard a strange sound and looked down to his right, Noah tilted his head and stepped closer, and then closer still. A duckling clung to a lower rock, Noah could hear the creature's distress and he looked back to Lucas before ignoring his father's previous warnings and carefully stepping from the edge onto the rocks. Noah bent down and after a few seconds he scooped the duckling up and placed it onto the grass, the duckling quickly waddled as Noah straightened himself to see a Lucas staring at him, "GET BACK HERE" Lucas raised his voice in disapproval and Noah stepped up to another rock.

Lucas sighed, "I have to go, I will send you an email later. Bye" he slipped his phone back in his pocket just as a football landed near his foot. Lucas saw Noah climbing back up and picked up the ball, he turned around and threw it quickly back to the family further down and returned their smile before turning back to Noah.

As soon as Lucas turned his smile dropped, Noah was no longer by the rocks and a quick glance of the area caused panic to course through Lucas as he saw no sight of his son. A second hadn't passed before Lucas began running to the edge where he last saw Noah.

His gut dropped, a darkness curled inside Lucas, as dark as the murky river that was higher and rougher than in the summer months.

"NOAH!"

Lucas spotted the small hand first, not far down the river, the fingers grasping for anything they could find and then Noah's head broke the surface. Noah gasped as air rushed into his lungs but the water pulled him down again even as his hands found a string root and took grasp of it.

With little thought Lucas reached Noah's spot and leaning down he took grip of his sons' wrist and pulled Noah up, and with all his weight Lucas flung Noah to safety.

Noah splattered, his breathing coming in heavy rasps, still in shock the skinny boy began to shake as cold wind met his wet body.

Also shaking Lucas kneeled in front of Noah and quickly removed Noah's jacket and shoes, _"what were you thinking?"_ Lucas' voice shook with emotion, " _I told you not to go near the rocks_!" Lucas wrapped Noah in his own jacket and quickly hugged Noah tightly, "never scare me like that again"

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry" Noah buried his face into Lucas' shoulder.

Without another word Lucas picked Noah up and carried him all the way back to his pick-up. In the safety of the car Lucas retrieved his gym bag and helped Noah dry himself. Naked with damp hair Noah was still shaking on the inside. Lucas gave his son his spare hoodie and socks, and then added his still dry knitted sweater to Noah's apparel, though Lucas was only wearing a thin tee he could not feel the cold.

"I'm sorry" Noah whispered, his face slightly pale and lacking emotion.

Lucas licked his lips before cupping Noah's cheeks between his hands, "we could have lost you, do you understand how lucky you were. I told you to stay away from the river today" the last bit was said with anger born from fear.

"I know, I should have listened"

Lucas didn't say anything else, he embraced Noah again as silent tears ran down the father's cheeks, and he never wanted to feel this way again. Sometimes being a father made Lucas feel so helpless, there was an added vulnerability to being a parent where so much of your world is wrapped up in your child and how they are.

"It's okay, Dad, it's okay" Noah whispered with confidence, he rubbed Lucas' back, "I'm alright, everything is okay".

-x-

The doorbell rang and Lucas opened the door expecting to see Brooke, his eyes met a clear view of the street and Lucas looked down. Jamie stood with a cheeky smile, rocking back and forth on his heels, "hi, Uncle Lucas"

"Jimmy-Jam, what are you doing here?"

"I'm with Aunt Brooke. Momma had to go to work and Aunt Brooke and I watched soaps and had hot chocolate with marshmallows"

"No wonder you're smiling" Lucas ruffled his nephew's hair and looked over to the driveway where Brooke was walking around the car towards them. Brooke was bundled up, her soft waves covering most of her face blocking her eyes from him yet Lucas sensed she was avoiding looking at him and felt he knew Brooke well enough to recognise the guilt that she wore.

"Hi, Brooke"

"Hi, Luke. How's Noah been?"

Lucas waited a moment and then told Jamie to go find his cousin, stepping outside Lucas closed the door behind him and what ever had Brooke averting her gaze from his had disappeared. The brunette looked straight at Lucas with her hazel green eyes, they looked greener with the storm clouds behind her, Lucas swallowed, "he's fine, he's been great-"

"But?" Brooke crossed her arms.

"There was an incident today. While we were on our walk, Noah's okay, I think my reaction shook him more than anything but he's okay" as he spoke, he saw the confusion and worry flicker in Brooke's eyes and quickly explained, "I'd told him to stay away from the edge but Noah slipped into the river when he went to save a stranded duckling" he gave a sad chuckle. "It was the scariest minute of my life, Brooke, I thought my heart had leapt out of my chest. I yelled at him when I pulled him out"

"Is he hurt?"

"No but if he wasn't such a strong swimmer it could have been a very different story"

She hesitated, "are you okay?"

"I'm fine"

For a long moment neither spoke again, their eyes remained locked on each other, and then Brooke parted her lips before closing them again. Lucas blinked, the break in eye contact was all that was needed for Brooke to compose herself and she stepped back turning to stand on her side, "I'm sure Noah understands your reaction" she turned her head to look at the door behind Lucas, "I'll talk to him when we get home."

They were silent for another moment before Jamie opened the door, his face bored, "can we go now?"

"Sure. Is Noah ready?"

Jamie rolled his eyes, "he's cleaning his room"

"I'll get him" Lucas re-entered the house and Jamie and Brooke followed, hovering in the entry way, the little boy moved from one foot to the other before lifting his big blue eyes up to his godmother.

His innocent voice spoke, "are you going to marry Uncle Lucas?"

Brooke almost choked and ended it with a little laugh, "you and your questions"

"That's not a no" he smirked.

"It's not a yes" Brooke kneeled down and pinched Jamie's cheek gently, "Your uncle Luke and I are just friends"

"With a kid"

Brooke shook her head, "it happens and if I ever decide to get married you'll be one of the first to know but I don't think it'll be to Luke, sorry buddy"

"Aw, then you could be my aunt for _real_ "

Brooke smiled, "I'm as real as it gets" and she kissed the tip of his nose before straightening up, "now don't go around asking people about my love life"

He groaned, " _what love life_ "

"Hey" Brooke lifted Jamie up and kinked her brow, "I might need to talk to your mother"

"Okay but Momma has _lots_ to say about your love life"

"I really need to talk to her then, don't I?" and though she gave a chuckle a frown marred her smooth skin as she placed Jamie's feet back to the ground as Noah and Lucas appeared.

"Hi, Mom" Noah gave a small smile and then turned to his father and briefly hugged Lucas's legs, "bye, Dad"

"I'll see you in a few days" Lucas promised and followed Brooke and the boys out, he remained on the porch as they left, giving a wave as the car drove away. Through the car window Lucas saw Noah and Jamie waving back.

And then he was alone again.

-x-

At Nathan and Haley's house Brooke pulled out the spare key to their house and let herself in, Jamie pushed the door open faster, his little feet rushing forward while Noah stayed by her side.

"Dad!" Jamie yelled.

"In here" Nathan's voice yelled back, he turned to Clay, "looks like you will get to meet my family after all" and his face lit up as Jamie ran into the room straight to his arms.

"Who are you?" Jamie gave Clay a suspicious look.

Nathan scolded his son and placed the small blond boy back on the ground, "Jamie this is Clay Evans, an agent who wants to represent me. Clay this is my son-"

"James Lucas Scott" Jamie held out his hand.

Amused Clay took the hand on offer and shook it, "it's nice to meet you, James Lucas Scott"

"My father's the best basket player in the _world_ " Jamie whispered loudly to Clay.

In the doorway Brooke chuckled and Clay looked up, his mouth falling open at the sight of the brunette leaning against the bannister.

Nathan smiled, "Brooke" he walked over and kissed her cheek, resting his hand at the small of her back.

Brooke returned the kiss, "hi, sweetie. Sorry I'm early but Jamie wanted to come home" and she allowed Nathan to lead her to the familiar new comer.

"That's alright. You can meet Clay, he's trying to win me over"

Swallowing hard Clay felt his stomach drop, he frantically looked between the two smiling brunettes and noticed the devilish twinkle in Brooke's hazel gaze.

Clay then noticed the second boy, "Mom, may I please be excused?"

"Sure, hon" she touched the boy's shoulder briefly before he walked away and then she turned those twinkling eyes back to Clay and h whispered under his breath, _oh, boy!_

"Hi, I'm Brooke. It's nice to meet you, Clay was it?" Brooke held out her hand and Clay shook it checking discretely for a ring as he did so. Brooke stepped back and slapped Nathan's chest with the back of her hand, the move so casual, "Jamie's right though, Nathan is one of the best"

With a nervous chuckle Clay cringed inwardly as he put on a fake smile, "you don't need to sell your husband to me, I'm suitably impressed"

Jamie began to laugh while Nathan frowned and Brooke smiled, the boy slapped his knee, "she's not my _mom_ , that's Aunt Brooke, she can't marry my dad"

Brooke pulled her godson to her, hugging him from behind, "guilty as charged"

"Where is Haley?" Nathan turned to Brooke.

"Called into work, I offered to watch the little monster. Do you want me to stay here for a bit and keep an eye on Jamie?"

"No, that's fine, we're almost finished here"

"Stay, Aunt Brooke, _please,_ you can stay for dinner" Jamie started to climb up his aunt until he was being held in her arms, he turned his baby blue eyes to his father, "please, Dad, can Aunt Brooke stay for dinner?"

"How can I say no to that? If it's alright with Brooke there's always room at our table for her"

"Yes!" Jamie punched his fist into the air, "come on, Aunt Brooke, I want to show you something" and he climbed down and began to drag Brooke away. As Jamie pulled Brooke out of the room, she gave a playful wave goodbye to the men.

-x-

At his computer Lucas sat his brow furrowed as the search engine loaded its results, the screen went from white to a list of results. It didn't take long for Lucas to see a result he was happy to click on, he followed the third link _Conditions for Marriage Annulment in North Carolina_.

His eyes strayed to the framed photos on his desk, Lucas reached out towards the photo of Peyton and he quickly lay the frame facedown. Five minutes later Lucas grabbed the frame and slipped out the photograph, he placed it in a shoebox and then went and collected the others that were placed around the house. Peyton had taken almost everything of her own, leaving only the odd missed item or things of little value.

In one box Lucas collected the few things Peyton had missed, some clothes that had been left in the wash, a pair of earrings that had been left on the bedside table, a CD that had been in his car, and a few other miscellaneous items. Lucas taped the box and wrote Peyton's fathers address on the box and then used a garbage bag to collect the rest to throw out.

Once all trace of his wife was out of the house Lucas retrieved the box of Sawyer's that he had hidden away and returned his daughters few belongings back into the limelight. Photos of Peyton were replaced by Sawyer, Noah and the rest of his family's images.

Back at his desk Lucas held the frame that now encased a photograph of Noah on his birthday, Lucas ran his thumb over his son's face and gently placed the frame back into place. Exiting the open window Lucas opened up his manuscript and after a brief pause his fingers began to type, one word followed another.

-x-


	24. Chapter 24

*****Disclaimer*** for creative purposes only, and I claim no ownership of the fandom, characters and setting.**

 **Apologies, I had wanted to update days ago but I struggled to tie this chapter up a lot more than I thought I would. It's a short chapter and for days I've tried to add to it but nothing felt natural and I realised that it's just a short chapter and I reverted back to the original form.**

 **I would like to conform I am aiming for my fortnightly updates again. Thanks again for your amazing responses, of course there mixed at the moment and I can't really comment much *zips mouth and through away the key* because spoilers. I got a kick a while ago when a certain reviewer, who has an uncanny ability of predicting many plot points, mentioned Clay with Brooke. Thanks to B4C, WMC, GH Jasam Fan, New to Broke, fish33o, Nope, bjq, NotRob, Callison, blz7, BrookeLucas, BrucasLove, breathbookslove, evilythedwarf, princesakarlita411, elijahmontanez543, lileen, diane, LoverGurrl411, SassyGrl23 and the gusts reviewers. A big thanks and welcome to the new reviewers and followers.**

Chapter Twenty-Four

It was one thing and a million things that Brooke missed about living with Sam. The teenager had always kept Brooke on her toes and she hadn't been in the house for five minutes before making herself at home and teasing Brooke about everything under the sun.

The house was eerily silent except the two of them, Sam giggled from her spot on the floor, fluffed up by pillows, where she lay in a long baggy plaid shirt that had seen better days and her hair already looking like a bird's nest.

"Come on, Brooke. It's not like you didn't drink at my age, one glass won't kill me" she rolled her eyes.

Perched on the couch in a fluffy gown Brooke slowly sipped her glass of wine, she exaggerated her pleasure with each sip until Sam threw a pillow straight at her. Brooke was quick enough to save her glass but she threw the pillow back, "hey, do you know how much this couch cost!"

"More than they're worth" Sam huffed, "you have a kid now, you're not allowed nice, new things" she said it ever so sweetly and Brooke threw a cushion at Sam.

Instead of reacting Sam took the new cushion and rolled over placing it with the others under her head, she stared at the roof amazed at how perfect it was, smooth and unblemished. Brooke watched where she sat, the older woman placed the near empty wine glass down and leant her chin atop her hands, she watched the teenager in front of her and smiled.

"So what new drama is unfolding on the sleepy streets of Tree Hill?" Sam kept her eyes on the roof.

"No drama"

Sam rolled back over and lifted herself up, her dark eyes widening, "oh, bullshit, it's been how long since Peyton did a runner? And instead of grabbing your man before some twenty-year-old nerd snaps him up you're doing the dirty with some manwhore-"

"Oh my god, Sam, just because I can't ground you anymore-"

"We should be able to talk girl to girl" Sam interrupted Brooke and plopped herself down on the couch, "and as happy I am you are finally getting some-" she ignored Brooke's grumble, "-I'm with Haley on this, you deserve better than being some guys booty call"

Laughing loudly Brooke took a moment before leaning forward so her nose was close to Sam's, "girl to girl… he's my booty call not the other way around"

"You know he's hooking up with other women?" Sam changed her tactics.

Brooke reacted by rolling her eyes, her head fell back and she sighed, "and that has nothing to do with me. Besides, how do you even know that?"

"When I babysat at Naley's last time Haley had a lot to say" Sam smiled, "Nathan defended you though, he said you can do whatever or whoever you like and it's not any of our business"

"I always liked Nathan"

"So I've heard" Sam raised an eyebrow and Brooke elbowed the teenager, "I love that you can't tell me off anymore"

"I may not be your foster mother anymore but I am still the responsible adult and you are currently under my roof"

A look passed over Sam's face, her smile dropped, and she gave a little nod to herself. Looking into Sam's eyes Brooke saw a flicker of disappointment and her mind went over everything Sam had been saying, she sighed and pulled the teenager in for a hug, "being an adult can be complicated sometimes"

"It's just you're wasting time with this guy who you don't even care about and who doesn't care about you. And you had Julian, he was great and he would have done anything for you, but you said no to him for some insane reason"

"That was bad timing, Julian wanted more than I could give him"

"And then you choose a guy who wants nothing" Sam mumbled something and then said louder, "but what do _you_ want?"

Brooke's lips parted and no words came out.

"How would you feel if it was me?" Sam changed tactics and Brooke narrowed her eyes, even as Brooke went to answer Sam held up a finger, "and don't say it's not the same thing"

"Let's change the subject" Brooke kissed Sam's cheek as she stood, "I'm going to check on the boys and grab some more chocolate"

As soon as Brooke left the room Sam scanned her surroundings, she hesitated briefly and then reached for Brooke's abandoned glass of wine and tentatively took a sip, " _eck"_ Sam's expression contorted and she carefully placed the glass back down.

With soft, silent footsteps Brooke ascended the back staircase. Though she had planned to give Noah the largest room to the far left of the house, instead Noah chose the smallest room on the right that was unique in the view it offered overlooking the back of the house and to the river. It was still a large room and its door was just a right turn from the back staircase, Brooke gently pushed the door open and let the light into the room.

Noah lay asleep on his side under the blankets of the bottom bunk, a hand tucked under one pillow and the other holding an open book perilously on the edge of the bed. Quiet snores came from Noah's lanky form, while on the top bunk Jamie lay on his stomach, half under the covers, a leg poking from under the safety rail and one arm hugging a pillow.

Unlike his cousin, Jamie was sleeping quietly, he shifted, one leg spreading further and even in sleep he turned his face away from the light. Brooke quickly made her way to bed, the yellow walls made the light reflect brighter and Brooke had no trouble seeing as she slipped the book from between Noah's fingers, after she replaced the bookmark Brooke placed the book on the bedside table and smoothed touched Noah's cheek for but a second before leaving the room.

When Brooke left the room she left the door ajar and took her time walking back down the stairs, at the kitchen entrance Brooke stopped, she sighed as she looked out to where Sam was still sitting on the couch. Something stopped Brooke, the younger girl had grown so much since she'd left Brooke's care and Sam had a way of looking straight into Brooke's soul.

A part of Brooke was furious at Haley for discussing such private things with Sam, there was another part of Brooke that was angry at herself for Sam meeting Clay and finding out about them. Brooke wasn't ashamed of her non-relationship with the agent, they both knew the score, they both enjoyed the company, and nobody was getting hurt. Brooke reminded herself that her friends judgement came from a place of love, they wanted more for her and Brooke could not fault them for that, she only wished they kept in mind what Brooke wanted too.

With little effort Brooke placed a smile on her face and walked into the kitchen, her body ached all over and even though her stomach was twisting inside Brooke rushed and grabbed her stash of chocolate and silently sat next to Sam again. At the same time they both grabbed a chocolate bar and ate it in unison, Brooke moaned while Sam got more comfortable and rested her head against Brooke's shoulder.

-x-

At six in the morning Noah Davis-Scott woke, he remained where he was for a minute before he got out of bed and promptly made it. After checking that his cousin was asleep, Noah slipped on his robe and slipped before picking up his book and taking the stairs down to the kitchen.

The television glowed from the family room and Noah could see Sam's arm hanging over the couch, it didn't make sense to the boy that Sam would choose to sleep on the couch instead of in the guest bedroom that was designed for her. Noah poured himself a glass of water and quietly made his way to the library, it was Noah's favourite room most days, he loved the floor to ceiling bookshelves even though they were mostly empty and what little filled them was mostly not books.

Brooke had made a corner for Noah, half his own books were lined up in the shelves, and a large leather chair just for him. Noah liked to read in the spot, or work on his homework, and when he took a break he would sit and watch his mother work on the other side of the large room. Noah liked to watch his mother work, she always appeared so graceful and the more excited she became the bigger the bounce in her step became.

There was a look his mother wore than Noah loved to see as well, he loved how she could go from concentration to exasperation or joy in a second. Her smile was Noah's favourite thing, he hadn't understood why people found smiles so beautiful until he saw his mother's, it didn't just light up her face or the room, it lit up all those surrounding Brooke as well.

Noah opened the novel his father had gotten him, admitting that he was finding fiction more enjoyable than he used too. Just over three chapters later Noah stopped reading, his ears perked up and the boy frowned.

A second later Noah abandoned his book and tiptoed to his mother's bedroom door, Noah knocked, "Mom?" and a moment later more insistent " _Mom_ , _are you okay_?"

When his mother answered her voice was muffled, "one second" and when she opened the door Noah's frown increased. Brooke was pale, all colour had left her face, and her eyes were pinched with pain.

"You're not well" Noah stated.

Brooke walked slowly back to her bed and lay down, Noah grabbed the edge of the duvet and pulled it over Brooke, "I can take care of you. Would you like a drink?"

With a cringe Brooke shook her head, she tried to smile "I'm okay. I'm just going to sleep some more" and she closed her eyes.

Leaving the room Noah went back to the family room and stood by Sam, he shook the teenager and called her name, and with a swat of her hand Sam rolled over " _whrrrwhatisit?_ " Sam covered her eyes with her arm.

"Mom's unwell"

Sam opened one eye and looked at Jamie, "I'm up" Sam said with just a touch of complaint and she left the room half asleep with Noah following behind. Once Sam went into Brooke's room, she shut the door with Noah still on the other side, the boy stared at the closed door for a long moment and then he returned to the kitchen.

A few minutes later Sam came into the kitchen, stood by the microwave for a few minutes and then left the room with a bucket in one hand.

Without a word Noah started making breakfast, silently moving around, and when Jamie finally woke it was to breakfast already waiting for him.

The three children sat around the kitchen table, Sam pulled apart her toast with her teeth, chewing loudly, "so, pipsqueaks, what should we do today?"

Neither boy answered, Sam eyed the windows to outside before looking at Noah and Jamie, "y'think Brooke will mind if we borrow the boat?"

In unison they both answered, "yes". Sam sighed.

None of them were that hungry and breakfast was a slow and lazy event, Sam sent them upstairs to get ready for the day and cleaned up while she waited. Soon Jamie was running down the staircase while Noah walked behind him, "right, I'm going to jump in the shower and you two delinquents can entertain yourselves for ten minutes".

Forty minutes later Jamie and Noah sat next to each other in the family room, "soooo…" Jamie drawled, "wanna play tag?"

"No, thank you"

Jamie popped his lips, his hands rubbed his knees in boredom, "you wanna play guitar hero?" and the look Noah sent him was answer enough, "wanna steal the boat?" Jamie grinned instead.

"Okay, I'll play tag".

-x-

After lunch Brooke fell asleep again, a sound woke her though she didn't recognise what it was at first before Brooke realised it was her phone ringing.

"Hey" Brooke answered.

"Hi, Brooke. I'm going to come pick Jamie up in half an hour" Haley's voice came through the line and Brooke woke up quickly at the emotions in her friends voice.

"Haley… is everything okay?"

"It's Dan… he died during the night" it wasn't sadness in Haley's voice, Brooke recognised the worry and felt the same.

"How's Nathan coping?" and before Haley could answer she added, "has Lucas been told"

"Yeah, Deb called Karen and she's telling Lucas." Haley sighed, "Nathan, well, Nathan is Nathan. A million mixed emotions, their relationship was complicated to say the least"

"That's an understatement. I'll make sure Jamie's ready" Brooke said into the silence, she hugged the phone to her ear "love you, Tutor Wife"

"You too" Haley disconnected the phone call and Brooke let out a deep breath.

Minutes later Brooke stepped out of her shower and quickly dressed, with all her effort she found the boys and instructed Jamie to go pack his bag. Noah watched Brooke with careful eyes and she kissed the top of his head, "how about when your cousin has gone home, the three of us watch a movie in my bed?"

"Okay" he nodded quietly.

Brooke and Sam gave Jamie a hug goodbye when Haley arrived, he went with his mother even though his face clearly showed he was confused why he was being picked up early, but he smiled and waved goodbye, "hope you feel better, Aunt Brooke!"

In the doorway Brooke stood with Sam and Noah on each side of her, all three of them waved goodbye.

-x-

Three days later when the doorbell rang Brooke was surprised, she wasn't expecting anyone and alone in the house Brooke took her time to answer. Before opening the door, Brooke looked through the peephole and paused, her eyes widened in surprise.

Her pupils danced around before Brooke took a breath and opened the door, "hi, what are you doing here?" she rushed out.

Clay stood on the other side dressed in a black suit with a crisp ivory shirt, a nervous smile on his face, "I thought I could pick you up?" he frowned as soon as he said the words, his light eyes going up and down Brooke's outfit. Contrary to Clay's formal suit, Brooke was dressed as casually as she could be in skinny leg jeans and a red and black off the shoulder shirt, her hair tied in a messy pony, with not one layer of make-up on her face.

"Uh…"

"Dan Scott's funeral" Clay smiled, "I didn't know the guy but I'm attending to support Nathan. I thought, I might feel less weird if I go with-"

"I'm not going" Brooke looked sideways and bit the corner of her lip.

Clay stepped back, "oh. That's fine, I thought… but, yeah, don't worry about it" he waved it off and took another step back.

"Okay, bye Clay" she felt uncomfortable having Clay at her front door, he'd only been at her house a couple of times and after Sam caught Clay half naked in the kitchen, Brooke hadn't let him visit since. As soon as Clay had left, Brooke closed the door again and continued what she was doing, she grabbed her bags and keys and quickly left the house.

Ten minutes later Brooke pulled into the driveway and lugging the bag over one shoulder, a bottle in one hand and a six pack in the other she walked to the door and knocked with one elbow.

Lucas opened his front door with weary eyes and all nervousness left Brooke, she lifted her hands and smiled "pick your poison?"

For a second Lucas just stared at Brooke and then he cracked a smile and gave a laugh, he opened the door wider silently letting Brooke inside. She slipped by him and Lucas took the six pack, "good choice" Brooke winked.

Brooke moved to the dark couch and Lucas handed her a bottle from the sick pack, they both twisted the lids and linked their bottled together before taking a long swallow.

"You want to talk?" Brooke asked after a few minutes, Lucas shook his head and reached for a second bottle.

They stayed splayed next to each other on the couch for a long time, eventually Lucas leant his head back, "I don't feel sad… I had been angry at Dan for so long and now it's just… gone"

"He wasn't your father, not in the way that counts. Keith raised you, loved you and shaped you into the man you are, not Dan Scott"

"Sometimes…" Lucas turned to look at Brooke, "I fear that there's more of him in me than I can admit"

Brooke licked her licks and briefly looked down, his eyes looked grey today and they seared into her heart, looking back into his confused gaze Brooke shook her head in denial. If there was one thing Brooke trusted about Lucas Scott it was that he wasn't his father's son, "I remember how Dan treated Nathan his whole childhood, the way he treated you and Karen, even Deb. Dan never grew up, he reacted to everything like an angry little boy and he took out his own frustrations on everyone around him instead of owning up to how he had fucked up his life" she shook her head again and took a small sip from her bottle, "you're nothing like him" she whispered.

Lucas didn't appear convinced and it broke Brooke's heart a little bit, parental issues was one thing Brooke could relate to but Brooke had never really thought of Dan as Lucas' father, the man had little to do with Lucas his entire life and whenever she pictured Lucas with _his father_ it was Keith that came to mind.

"You remind me so much of Uncle Keith. You know, he'd be so proud of you"

"Thanks, Brooke. For this… for everything"

"We're still friends, Luke" Brooke was quick to say and she gave him a genuine smile, "do you remember the first time I met Keith"

Lucas gave a hearty laugh, "how could I forget. We were so lucky it wasn't my mom"

"Karen loves me" Brooke giggled feeling the alcohol going to her head, "I'm like the daughter she never… wait, ah… yeah… the daughter she never had until well… Lily" and the lost look on her face as she tried to articulate her meaning made Lucas smile even more. "Any _way_ " Brooke drawled, "why are we talking about me? Tell me your favourite Keith memory"

"I don't know, there's so many"

"You have to have a favourite"

"Okay" Lucas' eyes narrowed as he rested more comfortably on the couch and thought back to when he was younger, he lifted a finger as he started "it'd when I was ten. My grandma was sick so Ma went to stay with her for a week and I stayed with Keith. There was this boy at school who really liked making things hard for me and we got into a fight, I don't remember what over." Lucas got lost in the memory, "and I was so scared to go to school so I pretended to be sick and Keith saw right through it but he didn't say anything, he called the school said I was sick and then told me to get dressed. He took me camping, we slept in this tiny tent and he taught me how to start a fire. It was great, we fished and he gave me my first sip of beer, and we just talked. We were there for three days and it was just… real".

"That's beautiful" Brooke commented.

They lapsed into silence and then Lucas poured them each a drink, "to Keith" he lifted his glass.

Brooke raised her own, "to Keith".

After they each drank half their glasses Brooke suddenly stood up, "I think we need to add food to this party. I'll order pizza" she stepped over Lucas' legs that were perched on the coffee table to reach for the home line.

Lucas listened as Brooke effortless ordered their favourites and as she hung up and went to step over his legs again Lucas grabbed her hand, his eyes met hers, "thanks, Brooke. I really mean it"

She gave a nod and let him hold her hand a moment longer before she slipped her hand free, "anytime" Brooke promised.

-x-


	25. Chapter 25

**Disclaimer: I still don't own anything but if I did the show would have gone a very different way.**

 **Hey, it's always hard to rewrite a chapter and try to include everything from the original, little details are going to be missed but I tried to keep it simple. So here is the long awaited twenty-fifth chapter. Thank you all for your patience and well-wishes. Thanks to all those who reviewed.**

Chapter Twenty-Five

Walking into the kitchen, Millie carried the large cake box, "am I late?" her hurried voice asked. Brooke took the box and laid it carefully on the counter, both women waited as Brooke slowly opened the box.

Millie gasped, "oh, it's amazing!" and then she straightened her large glasses, "and extremely creepy. I can't believe Noah is eight already"

"Me either" Brooke pouted slightly, "it's all going so fast". The thought scared Brooke, she'd missed over six years of Noah's childhood and time seemed to only go faster since he was returned to her care, "but he's not technically eight for another nine days. Thanks for picking up the cake"

"My pleasure"

Brooke gave the cake one last look. The giant tarantula was surprisingly lifelike and Brooke was more than impressed with the cake and hoped Noah would love it as well, she carefully closed the lid and turned back to the crate of gift bags she'd spent all night with Sam creating, "I'll leave these here" she muttered to herself.

Millie looked around, "anything else I can help with?"

"Let's see how it's going outside" Brooke headed to the back with Millie by her side, when they stepped outside Brooke's yard had been transformed. The animal farm had the usual farm animals and pony rides though Brooke had asked for more exotic animals more to Noah's liking. An area for the reptile show later was already being set up, and the large alligator themed bouncy castle was in the process of being inflated, the slides on one side started to take shape.

The pool had various animal themed toys and inflatables placed ready and waiting for the guests, and Millie couldn't help but gasp again, " _wow"_

"My parents never did anything to celebrate my birthday, I might be overcompensating" Brooke confessed.

Victoria's dull voice came from their right, she stood on the deck fussing over the food tables, "really Brooke, everyone said we spoiled you and yet you complain you didn't get some silly party"

"Hello Mother" Brooke smiled and her eyes twinkled at Millie as they both rolled their eyes.

Chin high Victoria moved one of the centrepieces an inch and then glided over to Brooke to kiss her daughter's cheek, "it seems another thing I must apologise for. Perhaps it would have been fun. You look as beautiful as ever, darling" Victoria said in way of hello and then she looked to Millie, "hello, Mindy, can you please find the caterer and tell them the ice boxes need filling. We can't very well serve our guests warm beverages" she fluffed her dark hair.

"Right away" Millie quickly ran off before Brooke could say anything, she gave her mother an exasperated look, "you know her name is Millie"'

"Of course, but I have a reputation to keep"

"It's so good to have you back in town Mother, though we are flying out to New York tomorrow so I don't know why you came"

"And miss Noah's party, he sent me the invitation himself" her chin got higher, "I don't see your father here"

"He's busy, work is really hectic" Brooke defended her father, an old habit, "and it's not Noah's actual birthday"

"Yes, that's only once a year, I suppose a good enough reason he has only bothered to meet Noah twice" Victoria sneered though her attention quickly changed, "look at these balloons, the animals could have done a better arrangement" her arms went up in the air and then she went chasing one of the party planners Brooke had hired.

There wasn't much for Brooke to do now, the guests would start arriving in ten minutes and things had gone according to plan all day. Enjoying the sun Brooke took in a deep breath, summer was her favourite season by far, the weather was perfect and Brooke felt at ease. Life was good, Brooke couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so good for so long, Tree Hill seemed to be taking a break from its usual drama.

"Hi"

Brooke couldn't help the smile as she turned to greet Lucas, "hi, yourself, you're late by the way"

"You told me you had it all covered" and he reached out to hug Brooke, when they pulled apart his arm hovered behind her as they looked out to the party, "it looks great"

"Thanks" she spun around and stepped away, her eyes narrowing, "where's Noah?"

"He ran into Sam and… well-"

"Aw, Luke, he adores you too"

"Yes, but I don't have homework for him to spellcheck" he paused in thought, "though perhaps he can edit my drafts"

Brooke laughed, "he'd love that"

"What's so funny?" Haley interrupted them as she and Nathan walked up with Jamie.

"Just thinking of hiring Noah as my new editor" Lucas explained. They all exchanged greetings with Brooke giving Jamie a kiss last, he leant against his godmother and bounced his bottom against her knees absentmindedly.

Lucas looked behind Haley and Nathan, a question in his eyes, and then he smiled, "just you three?"

"Who else you expecting?"

"No one" Lucas shook his head.

Brooke dragged Jamie with her as she began to walk away, "I'm going to go find Sam and Noah so we can start greeting everyone" and she left the others.

Alone with Nathan and Haley, Lucas placed his hands in his pockets, "Brooke's done a great job again"

"I hear Victoria helped a lot" Haley added.

Nathan had his eyes on his brother, "who were you expecting, big brother?"

"No one, no one" Lucas shook his head again.

No one bought his denial and Haley rolled her eyes, "oh Luke, we see right through you. Brooke didn't invite Clay. He hadn't even met Noah until Jamie's party and he doesn't know who he is, that macho act you pulled was so embarrassing"

"I was very polite" Lucas protested.

"You sent him evils the whole party and almost broke his hand when you shook it" Nathan laughed at his brother.

Even though Lucas knew Nathan was making fun of him, he couldn't help but chuckle back. Haley looked between the brothers and she smiled contently, happy at their joy and grateful to see smiles on both their faces.

The brothers started teasing each other, eventually laughing loud enough Victoria made a comment as she walked by. Lucas sent Brooke's mother a nonchalant smile in response before excusing himself to greet a group of children and their parents from Noah's school.

-x-

They stood side by side, one short and stocky; the other tall and lanky, one with brown hair and the other dark blonde. Noah's expression was blank while Jamie's lip was curled up, the boys had their eyes on the long line of children waiting for pony rides.

"I'm going to go back to the snakes" Noah gave a small nod to himself and waited a moment for Jamie as they both turned away.

"Let's hoof it out of here" Jamie smiled to himself and their feet moved faster towards the other animals.

Another boy, tall and blonde, was standing with a thin python over his shoulders, "hello, Zane" Noah greeted the other child.

"Hi, Noah. Have you met Donatello?" Zane sent a bright smile to Noah and gently lifted the python. The handler guided the boy and gently warned Noah and Jamie to not touch the head or tail. Noah stroked the snake first and then Jamie quickly had a turn.

A flash went off, Brooke lifted her camera a second time, "say cheese" and the three boys looked to the camera.

"You want me to take a photo of you and Noah?" a voice shocked Brooke from behind her, she turned with a gasp and then placed a hand on Brick's shoulder.

"You scared me" her heart beat relaxed and Brooke sent a dimpled smile at Brick, "do you mind?"

"Of course not" he took the camera.

"Mom, would you like to hold Donatello?"

"Ah… I'm good" Brooke eyed the snake as the handler passed it from Jamie back to Noah, Brooke moved as close to Noah as she could while still being as far away from the snakes head as possible, "this is nice" she tried to keep her smile on.

Noah held in a laugh at his mother's panic, his face remained calm "just breathe" the boy instructed and Brooke began to relax. For a moment she closed her eyes, the world vanished around her, and Brooke focused on the smell of Noah next to her and her own steady heartbeat, she opened her eyes and Brooke shuffled closer to Noah, her arm wrapped around his waist.

The flash lit up and Brooke waited an extra few seconds before she stood up and retrieved her camera, "thanks for that"

"You're welcome" Brick turned his attention to the boys, silently speaking to his son who instantly rolled his eyes and stepped away from the snake as the handler took it away to show a new group of children. He turned back to Brooke, "and I should thank you, for letting me bring all the kids"

"Of course, the more the merrier. Your girls are so sweet anyway, its my pleasure" Brooke smiled warmly, she was thrilled that all the children were having a great time and the sound of children's joy was always welcome in her home. This was what she had always dreamt off.

"How do you do it?" Brick's question brought Brooke back to the present, he looked at her with pale eyes and a look of wonder, "you and Lucas seem so… put together. It's been three years since Cindy and I separated-" Brick clicked his tongue "-and there's still no way we could be in the same room for more than five minutes and yet you and Lucas are always together at all school events and you're both here at the same birthday party for Noah… you guys make it look so easy"

Brooke couldn't speak for a minute and then she laughed, her head thrown back to expose her long, pale neck, her eyes were greener when she relaxed enough to answer, "trust me, easy is one word I would not use" Brooke made sure the boys had wandered far enough away before she continues, "Lucas and I are complicated. It's not easy, I'm sure most weeks we want to strangle each other but… despite everything we've been friends for so long and, ultimately, we get no pleasure in hurting each other and we want the same thing, Noah to be happy and healthy. Our lives are so entangled it takes much more effort to live in the same town and avoid each other, and yes… we've done that but it can never last." her face turned playful, "Fake it 'til you make it"

"That's your advice. Fake it?"

"Yep" Brooke started to walk further away, Brick by her side, "you guys both decided to end it, right?"

"If you can call it that. We fought so much at the end… and we always seem to fall back into that pattern"

"Was there closure?"

"It was three years ago" Brick sighed.

"Lucas and I haven't been together in seven years and-"

" _What?"_ Brick was shocked, "seven years? I thought, you know, never mind"

Brooke shrugged, "sometimes time does not mean closure, perhaps the reason you two always fight is because that fight never got an end. Maybe next time don't walk away, finish it"

"Fight with my ex-wife?"

"Preferably no fists involved" she narrowed her eyes and Brick laughed at the innocent expression on her face.

Across the yard, standing near the bouncing castle, Skills stood with Mouth and Millie, all their eyes darting from two opposite sides of the party.

Millie looked at the boys disapprovingly, she lifted a hand to slide her glasses further up her nose, "it isn't right".

"Naw, it's just a bit of fun" Skills, gave a firm nod, "twenty for two minutes, straight beeline"

Mouth shook his head, "one minute, first attempt, three minutes later follows through"

"Marvin!" He ignored Millie's outrage and looked at his watch, "this is not funny"

Skills chuckled, from out of nowhere Sam appeared next to Millie, "what's so funny?"

"I's not funny, it is outrageous, they're placing bets on Brooke and Lucas" Millie answered as Skills blew off her concerns.

"Nah, man, it's not hurting anyone" Skills eyed Sam, "our boy Luke has been eyeing Brooke talking to Hot Brick, he's trying to act like it doesn't bother him-"

"Yes" Mouth pumped his fist and then tried to casually hide his excitement as Lucas headed towards where Brooke was but got half way and detoured to Haley.

"Twenty bucks to whoever guesses how long it takes for Lucas to go interrupt them" Skills finished telling Sam, "Mouth said one minute for first attempt then three after he finishes, I am two, you in?"

Sam rubbed her hands together, eyeing Lucas and then Brooke, she smiled and her glazed over with a devilish twinkle, "I bet he sends Noah over instead".

They all stood in anticipation watching the scene unfold, Skills swore as the minutes went buy, and then Lucas quickly left his position next to Haley and his hands went into his pockets as he made his way over to intercept Brooke and Brick. Sam groaned as Lucas got near, Mouth's smile widened.

"Hey, Brooke" Lucas' smile was a little forced, Brooke flashed a smile at her ex and then she looked at Brick, they shares a knowing look and he rolled his eyes. Lucas felt his hands itch, "should we start getting the cake ready?"

"Sounds great. If you can get everyone ready I will go get the cake" Brooke looked back to Brick and placed a hand on his arm, "I'll see you later" and she walked off with Lucas.

"Are you ready for your trip?"

"All packed" Brooke changed the subject quickly, "okay, so if you can gather everyone around this table and meet me in the kitchen…" Brooke paused.

"Okay" Lucas nodded and they separated, he headed straight for Nathan and Haley to get their help to gather all the guests up and then as everyone started moving Lucas scooped Noah up, "time for cake, birthday boy"

"It's not my actual birthday"

"Who cares, its cake!" Jamie yelled as he raced ahead.

It was a large crowd, the children all at the front surrounding Noah, they ranged from children his own age to those in their early teens, but the adults outnumbered the children. Lucas placed his hands on Noah's shoulders and smiled, pride filling him.

Despite not wanting to walk away from Noah, Lucas left everyone to join Brooke. She nodded to the caterer near her and the candles were lit, Brooke stepped closer to Lucas and smiled warmly, "you ready, dad?"

He reached out a hand to hep Brooke support the cake board, "always" he winked.

Together they stepped forward, they met their friend's eyes and began to sing, voices joined them immediately, Brooke and Lucas walked closer and closer, their smiles widening, and as the birthday song came to an end the parents placed the giant tarantula cake in front of Noah.

The boy stared at the burning candles for a long moment, and then his cousin's voice broke the silence, "make a wish".

Noah closed his eyes and blew. There were whistles and claps, more birthday wishes shouted out, Noah didn't understand the excitement but he smiled with gratitude and those around his and his dimples appeared as his smile widened when Brooke ran her finger along the side of a spider leg and then popped the icing she'd collected onto his nose, as he licked off the icing Noah exclaimed happily, "it's good".

"What did you wish for?" Victoria asked her grandson, already handing his a serviette to wipe his face.

Brooke shook her head, "he can't tell"

The cake was quickly handed out as slices were cut, Brooke guilt everyone who said no into taking at least a small piece.

Jamie took his slice and awkwardly stood wondering where to sit and eat it, he didn't know any of the other children except for Noah and his parents were with his Aunt Brooke and Uncle Lucas but Brooke's mother was with them and Noah found the older woman very scary.

Eventually Jamie sat down with Noah and a few of the other kids, "cool cake" he said as he sat. The other kids nodded, and Noah gestured towards Jamie, "this is my cousin, James Scott"

"Jamie" he corrected and took a big bite of cake.

The girl next to Noah grinned, "Hello, Jamie, I'm Nicola. It's nice to meet you, Noah has told me you play the piano too"

Jamie grumbled, "Not really"

"He says you're really funny"

"You think I'm funny?" Jamie's eyes widened and he looked at his cousin confused.

Noah nodded, his face serious "yes, you have a good sense of humour and I like your use of puns"

Surprised Jamie let his plate of cake almost fall to the ground; he placed it down gently and sent wide eyes to his older cousin, "how come you never laugh at my jokes?" Jamie had never thought his new cousin liked him, he'd never heard Noah laugh, the best he got was a smile and Jamie had thought Noah smiled at him because he was weirdly polite.

For a moment Noah was lost in thought, then his green eyes met Jamie, "I don't know, a lot of the time my laugh stays on the inside"

Nicola grinned, "I like it when you laugh on the inside, your eyes twinkle" and then her cheeks turned red and the subject quickly changed. Something changed inside Jamie, his body relaxed, and he sent a large smile to Noah seeing his cousin in a whole new light.

-x-

Brooke looked away from Haley and up at Lucas, she couldn't help but laugh, "What? The blonde asked.

"You have icing all over your face" Brooke waved her finger at his face, "a little there and there"

He ducked his head and Lucas wiped at his mouth, and then licked at the back of his hand. Brooke laughed again, her hand instinctively reached up, her thumb brushing to the right of Lucas' lip, and the laughter died as skin met skin. It was the briefest of seconds and Brooke quickly snatched her hand away. Lucas tried to laugh to ease the moment, his tongue flicked out to the spot Brooke had just touched, it still tingled and his eyes watched her from the side of his vision.

It took a lot of will power for Brooke to remain where she stood, her hand warm, as she avoided meeting Lucas' eyes as she felt his gaze burn her. She focused her attention on Haley, "how's the new song coming along?"

As Haley answered, Brooke's mind wandered, she could still see some black icing near Lucas' lips and knew he kept gazing at her. The warmth spread through her body, memories assailed Brooke, back to a time when looks like that would send them off to the closest lockable space, and those memories had Brooke's imagination run wild. Haley's voice kept speaking but Brooke's eyes glazed over, her heartbeat sped up, she imagined wiping the icing off with her thumb, then licking it closely as his eyes diluted, and then she'd lick the rest of him getting closer and closer til her lips met his. The sugary taste of the icing would blend with Lucas' taste, which had always reminded Brooke of spices and warm whiskey on a hot day.

Brooke blinked away the thoughts, she placed her hand to her chest and sucked in a breath, "that sounds great" she whispered, her voice broke, "excuse me" and she left the group to escape inside.

The hardest thing to run away from was her own mind and its unruly thoughts.

"Hey, the party is outside, why are you hiding in here?" Sam bounced in behind Brooke, the teenager grinned knowingly.

"I'm just checking on things"

"Making sure no one has run off with the silver?" Sam joked, she pointed outside, "the kid wants to open his presents"

Brooke kinked her brow, "Noah?"

"Well, all the other kids want Noah to open his presents" Sam shrugged.

Abandoning her peace, Brooke nodded and followed Sam out, a smile on her face to hide the nerves still tingling inside her.

-x-

 **A lot of this chapter and even the last chapter is to show how time is moving faster, it's now the end of summer. Lucas has come a long way since Sawyer's death and Peyton leaving, and BL are settling into their own routine and easing up a bit.**


	26. Chapter 26

_**Disclaimer: I own nothing except my apologies. I'm so tired I'm gonna say thanks and catch you next time. Enjoy.**_

-x-

Chapter Twenty Six

The airport was thick with waiting people, Lucas had made sure he arrived early, and he waited with anticipation his eyes. Gaze locked on the escalator where he knew they would appear, Lucas shoved his hands in his pockets and rocked on his feet, impatient with each slow minute that ticked by.

It didn't take long for Lucas to spot Brooke, his eyes lit up on recognition, he could barely see her yet even this far away he knew it was Brooke by the way she moved. Her face was turned away from him, looking down, he knew she must be talking to Noah who was still hidden from his sight, Lucas stepped closer and trained his eyes on where Brooke's brown locks could be seen moving along the crowd.

Eventually her face lifted and something akin to relief filled Lucas, her eyes looked around searching for something and then eventually Brooke found Lucas and the corner of her lips quirked up a little.

As soon as they stepped off the escalator Brooke took a beeline for Lucas, he met her half way and caught his first glimpse of his son, "it's good to see you both" he gave Noah a hug, one arm pulling the boy to his side, and then sent Brooke a smile, "how was the trip?"

"Good, I got a lot done" Brooke answered, "but we missed home"

"And it missed you" Lucas said to Brooke and then turned his attention to Noah, "have you grown? You seem taller"

"Probably" Noah answered in his usual deadpan tone, and then he lifted his chin looking first to his father and then his mother, "I'm hungry"

"You just ate on the plane!" Brooke scoffed in disbelief, she rolled her eyes and placed a hand on Noah's shoulder subconsciously signally Noah and Lucas to walk with her, "where do you put it all, I do not know"

"We can stop by and grab something on the way back. I'm starting to get hungry myself" Lucas matched their steps and when they picked up their luggage he took them automatically, "so what do you feel like?"

They soon were all in the car, Brooke turned up the radio and rested her head back, she closed her eyes, and blocked out everything else. Before she knew it Brooke fell asleep, until Lucas shook her awake, "Brooke, we're here" as she opened her eyes he lifted his brow in question, "do you want to stay in the car or we can get it take away if you don't want to come in"

"No, it's fine" Brooke unclicked her seat belt, "let's go feed the bottomless pit" she yawned even as she said it.

When they found a table Noah went straight for the menu, Brooke immediately ordered a coffee to wake herself up, "I know what I want" Noah placed the menu down and folded his hands on the table, his eyes going between his parents.

"So do I, let's order" Lucas rubbed his hands together.

Brooke sipped her coffee, slowly feeling herself become more aware, she listened to Noah and Lucas speaking, their conversation flowing.

"-and Grandmother took us to the ballet" Noah ended his last sentence and Brooke smiled at the memory.

"You would have liked that" Lucas commented, he sent Brooke a grin and she gave a nod, "how 'bout you?" he turned to Noah.

"It was an _experience._ " his lips popped, "Mom liked it but… I don't know why"

"Ballet is not his thing" Brooke smiled through her tiredness, "what do you want to do tomorrow?" she added on flippantly.

"I want to climb a volcano!"

Brooke almost spat out her coffee and Lucas chuckled, Noah had said his request with veiled excitement as if he was asking to go to the park.

"And I want a million dollars" Brooke replied sarcastically.

Noah lifted his brows, "we're rich. You have a million dollars"

"He's got you there" Lucas smiled and then chuckled again at Brooke's gobsmacked expression, he turned to Noah "it's a little too late to plan a volcano climb but maybe next year we can go to New Zealand during the holidays and climb a volcano there"

"Ooh, I love that and I'm inviting myself along"

"Of course, Ma wouldn't expect anything else" and then he sighed, "Besides if I have to climb a volcano, you have to as well"

"Deal" She nodded. Brooke hadn't visited Karen since Noah had re-entered her life, she started to mentally plan the trip for the next summer, within seconds Brooke had another idea and she looked to her son, "would you like to go sailing tomorrow?"

Lucas perked up, "That's a great idea"

"Can I steer?" Noah asked politely.

"Of course," Brooke winked at Lucas after she replied, "you can be captain for the day. I'll even get you a hat"

"I don't need a hat"

"It would be so cute though" she teased and was rewarded with a roll of the eyes from her son.

To an outsider the scene would be that of any normal happy family, parents and child having dinner together, for Brooke the time was more poignant. Every minute was not to be wasted, every minute was shadowed by their past, and she watched as Lucas and Noah easily conversed, as if they spoke the same language and nobody else could understand, and how Lucas could coax a bright smile from Noah.

Despite how being so close to Lucas made Brooke feel, she couldn't help but smile at her son basking in his father's attention and how Lucas and her could at least always say they got this one thing right, if nothing else.

-x-

There was something familiar about the morning, Brooke rolled over in bed, her nose digging into the pillow, and with her eyes shut firmly Brooke refused to wake up. Her mind chased dreams she could not even recall, a sense of happiness felt as if it was slipping from between her fingers with each moment she grew closer to waking, Brooke groaned.

And then Brooke realised that the familiar morning felt oddly different, the bed did not feel like her own and Brooke came to the realisation that she could not remember going to bed the night before, in fact the last thing she remembered was listening to a song in Lucas' car.

Brooke bolted up in bed, her eyes startled open, her lips parted at the sight around her. Dressed in her clothes from the night before Brooke was only missing her sandals and the clip from her hair, yet the brunette felt naked in the bed.

She scrambled off the mattress and breathed a sigh of relief to see her belongings were rested against the bed, " _Noah_ " Brooke whispered. With quiet footsteps Brooke left the room and stopped as she went by the lounge, her eyes moved straight to the pair of feet hanging off the edge of a couch.

Lucas slept soundly, his arm as a pillow as he awkwardly lay across the too small couch; Brooke chuckled to herself at the sight and fought the instinct to run her hands through his soft blonde hair.

In sleep Lucas looked so innocent, and too much like their son that it made Brooke's heart ache. She had missed him while they were away, Brooke couldn't admit it aloud, and though she told herself she had no right to miss him Brooke had felt his absence more each day.

It was never meant to feel this natural. Sometimes Brooke caught herself, in those moments when their eyes locked or they finished each other's sentences, when Noah would do or say something and Brooke's first thought was to tell Lucas, and she had to stop herself because beneath the ease of it all was the guilt, the unnerving feeling that she was taking something that didn't belong to her.

Her eyes flickered away from Lucas' sleeping form, Brooke continued on her way until she opened the door for Noah's room and a sigh of relief filled her, " _happy birthday_ " Brooke whispered.

She left the door ajar and returned to the master room, and Brooke sat on the edge of the bed looking at her luggage and placed her fingers to her chin while she internally debated what to do. It was the picture of Noah sleeping soundly in his bed that had Brooke begin to relax and lay down again, the pillow was soft under her head, and now Brooke recognised the familiar smell of Lucas.

Before she could question it Brooke felt her eyes closing, almost against her will, and sleep took control of her again.

The next thing Brooke knew was the loud sound of a trumpet like instrument that woke her with start, the room was aglow, light shining through the window, and the bed and day was warm.

"Wake up, sleepyhead" Lucas called and then something landed on the bed with small laugh.

Lucas let go of his son and watched Noah land on the bed near Brooke's legs, he got to his knees with a laugh, "Mom, you're going to miss our adventure!" his voice softened, " _helloooo?_ "

One arm shot out and Brooke rolled over, trapping Noah to her side in an embrace as she smiled wildly, "why are we awake so early?"

"It's nearly ten" Lucas answered, and he lifted his brow and folded his arms as Brooke turned to look at him.

Her eyes widened, "why didn't you wake me?"

"You needed the sleep" he stood up straighter.

Brooke looked to Noah, she tilted her head to the side "you look older today" she creased her brow in thought, "oh that's right, _happy birthday!"_ Brooke grinned and went to tickle Noah. Smaller and faster, Noah slipped from Brooke's grip, and he bounced a little as he stood atop the bed, his arms out defensively in front of him.

"There's no time for tickling," Noah sent his mother a disapproving look, "we're going to be late" he swiped a pillow and threw it at Brooke, "You need to get ready!" and before Brooke could reach him again Noah jumped off the bed and raced to Lucas' side.

"I think someone is impatient" Lucas laughed.

A second later Brooke stood up, her hands on her hips, "I'll get ready if you come back over here".

Noah took a step forward and then another, and Brooke reached out and gently took his hand, she pulled Noah into a soft hug and then kissed his cheek, "good morning, birthday boy"

"Thanks, Mom" and he hugged her back.

-x-

The wind blew her hair in front of her face, Brooke spat out a strand, brushed some more from her eyes and pulled her sunglasses down to protect her from the bright rays of the sun.

"Steer right… more!" Lucas' laughter filtered through the air and Brooke turned, lifting her camera to snap a photo of the moment. Brooke glanced at the picture on the screen; Noah's look of concentration was almost comical.

Brooke lifted the camera again, "this way, Captain, smile for the camera"

And Noah smiled at Brooke as he turned the wheel, with his dimples coming on display, and Lucas stood behind Noah and quickly stuck out his tongue as the flash went off. Brooke sent Lucas a look of mock anger and he rolled his eyes before smiling nicely for the camera and instructing Noah to do the same.

"That's better" Brooke commented.

Leaving her perch Brooke readjusted her sarong around her hips, she sauntered over to join them, on her way swiping the abandoned costume captain's hat from the table and then she placed it atop Noah's head. It sat lopsided against his brown locks, and Brooke snapped another photo before Noah moved it from his head and placed it on his father's.

"I don't know which Scott it looks better on" Brooke took another photo.

Lucas slowly took the hat off; he looked at it in thought and then smiled, gently putting it on Brooke, "we all know who is really in charge".

She winked at him, "don't you forget it" and she quickly looked away to shield her eyes from them. Brooke stared out at the seemingly endless sea. A glint in the distance caught her attention, "look!" she pointed.

"Dolphins" Lucas breathed out, guiding Noah to steer closer.

Noah's eyes lit up and Brooke couldn't take her eyes away at the joy she could see, sometimes she wondered what it would be like to see the world the way Noah did.

They lost sight of the dolphins and Lucas set them back on course, it was another twenty minutes before they moored. The small island was home to an old lighthouse that had not been in operation for many years, Lucas disembarked first and then helped Noah onto the jetty before reaching for Brooke's hand helping her up the steps.

It needed maintenance, Lucas noticed the change seven years had made, "have you been here since-" he began.

Brooke cut him off, "yes, a few times" and a memory of a sunset crept unwillingly to her mind, her body propped against Lucas' sitting form with the glow of campfire bathing their faces, "I was with your Mom and Lily the last time" she forced a different memory to the surface.

After a pause Noah ran ahead, "be careful" Brooke yelled after him, her own steps quickening.

"You stay with Noah, I'll get our things" Lucas turned back to the boat.

When she reached the white sand Brooke slipped off her sandals and untied her sarong, carrying them in one hand Brooke followed Noah and watched as he began to run, going out of sight as he disappeared behind a sand dune before appearing again.

His skin had darkened over the summer, glowing under the long, hot days, and he looked far from the boy Brooke had found a year and a half ago. Brooke stopped at a familiar spot along the beach and dropped her belonging before breaking into a run to catch up with Noah.

It was almost like a skip when Noah ran towards the water away from Brooke, his feet kicking up as he met the wet sand. Brooke caught Noah, picking him up from under his arms and swinging him gently around before placing her growing son to the ground again, their faces looking out to the North Carolina shore in the distance, "it's beautiful" Noah whispered.

Brooke kissed the side of his forehead, "yes, it is. You know, I once brought your father here for his birthday"

"Really?"

"A long time ago. I think we found every beach we could back in high school"

Noah leant back against Brooke and sighed as he relaxed, "I think the beach is my favourite place in the world".

In that moment, on the edge of the shore with water gently caressing her feet and her son in her arms, Brooke couldn't help but silently agree.

Lucas looked up from his task to find Brooke and Noah standing with their faces turned out to see, their eyes lost in the distance, a look of contentment on their faces. He straightened the picnic blanket and opened the picnic basket, "come get lunch!" Lucas called loudly and watched Brooke gently nudge Noah in his direction, her lips moved talking to their son and then the two of them were racing towards a waiting Lucas.

"I win" Brooke pumped her fists in the air.

-x-

After lunch Brooke flung herself back, her feet buried in the warm sand, and she rested her hands over her bare stomach, sighing with exhaustion from the meal.

Lucas and Noah chatted around her until they too fell silent, then it was only the wind, waves and birds making noise. The ground moved under Brooke, even with her eyes closed Brooke knew Lucas had stretched out as well, his shoulder close enough she could feel its presence even though they were far from touching.

His breathing was loud to Brooke's ears and her mind started to think she could feel his heartbeat thumping next to her.

A splash caught Brooke's attention, pulled her from her thoughts of the man next to her, Brooke opened her eyes and perched up on her elbows to see Noah now in the water, treading through.

Brooke stood, placing her sunglasses back down and ran to join her son, going pass him deeper into the welcoming cool water. When she turned back Noah was only knee deep, he smiled at his mother before bending down and scooping something from the sand.

After five minutes of swimming Brooke found Noah again, Lucas had joined him, the tall blonde now devoid of his shirt, his hair slightly wet from where he's run his wet hands through it. When he saw her watching, Lucas gave Brooke a wave, spoke down to Noah and then the two of them were heading towards her.

Brooke was the strongest swimmer, and even Lucas couldn't keep up with Noah, the father's athletic skill belonged on land. Still Lucas challenged them to a race, reaching the boat last with a jovial smile pleased for the others.

They spent the afternoon between the island and the water, Brooke wanted to return before sunset, she helped Noah start the boat and steer the right way home, and an hour later they were slowly moving down the river. Brooke had enjoyed the scenic route but she was keen to get Noah home, excitement started to build up inside Brooke.

Lucas held Noah carefully as the boy stood on the bench looking out over the water; Noah spotted his mother's house first and took it upon himself to help Brooke as they went into the boat shed.

When they got to the gate that separated the river and boat shed from Brooke's yard, Lucas sent Brooke a look and she nodded, he smiled and they headed towards the house.

Noah frowned, "aren't we going back to dad's house?"

"We're going to have dinner here first and then you'll come home with me" Lucas placed a hand on Noah's shoulder, subtly changing the boys direction.

Brooke moved to Noah's other side, "and I thought it was time we gave you your present" she pointed to the area to their left closer to the pool area.

"Your new pond?" Noah asked, confused he walked slower, "is it for me?

"Look closer" Brooke urged.

The parents walked behind Noah as he made his way to the area that was blocked off by large rocks, Noah stopped frozen as he took in that it wasn't a pond but an enclosure though there was a pond within it, and he walked faster as his eyes widened.

"Happy birthday, son" Lucas smiled.

Noah leant over the rock wall, his eyes went to the two small turtles nestled together and emotions filled him.

"The girl is from your mother and the boy from me, I set up an enclosure in your room upstairs too and there is one waiting for your room at my house too, so you can have them with you whenever you want"

Turning around Noah flung an arm around each parent; he closed his eyes tight, "thank you, thank you".

"You're welcome" Brooke kissed the top of his head. _This is my favourite spot_.

-x-


	27. Hold My Girl

**Disclaimer: same as the twenty six other times.**

 **I've really struggled to find the time to complete this one, and when I did I found myself struggling to write more in what felt like wasted hours. And I took this week off work to help finish this chapter (and to watch GoT – but don't get me started there) and today I realised the reason I was struggling was there was nothing else to write. So this is a short chapter, making it longer would have only held off the inevitable.**

 **I'm excited because now I can work on the next chapter, oh am I going to enjoy that. So much so that I am actually going to put a dagger to my throat (figuratively) and say this one will flow better from my finger tips and if you guys respond to this chapter (bonus points if you are a GoT fan) I will post the next chapter this weekend.**

 **So thanks to everyone who reviewed and all those sticking with this fic, thanks for your patience and understanding.**

-x-

Chapter Twenty-Seven

It was a day Lucas didn't want to wake up, though Lucas Scott had never been good at locking himself away inside, he needed distractions. The closer it came the harder Lucas worked, he'd edited his first draft until seven in the morning and then exhaustion had finally forced Lucas to sleep.

And then he woke up, half the day was gone, he forced himself to eat and then showered, never looking at his phone.

Then he ran.

Lucas ran until he couldn't anymore, he finally stopped and looked around; he'd left Tree Hill's borders long ago. Physically exhausted Lucas sat down upon a nearby log, burying his face in his hands. The tears came, his chest burned with the pain, Lucas felt as helpless as he had a year ago and it swallowed him whole.

The memories came again, Lucas stood, turned around and started running back to town, his whole body ached but the pain was a relief. The pain was a distraction.

-x-

The pain twisted inside Brooke with each step she took, dulled by the painkillers but not absent, she bit the inside of her lip and reached high for the new medication her doctor had prescribed her in New York.

"I don't know why you don't have the surgery" Haley shook her head where she perched on the stool at the kitchen counter.

"It just seems so _extreme_ " Brooke tried to laugh it off, "and it's gotten better, heaps better, today is the first day and it's always worse but tomorrow I'll be fine". She swallowed the tablets and turned back, "I shouldn't have eaten lunch, so regretting that decision"

"Do you want me to pick Noah up for you today?"

"No, I'll be fine" she shrugged, "we've got plans"

Haley gave Brooke a curious look, after a pause she linked her hands and rested her chin on them as she looked at Brooke, "are you free tonight? I thought you and Noah could come over for dinner"

"You're not sick of me yet?" Brooke chuckled as she joined Haley and sat down, adding casually "not cooking does sound good".

"I have a better idea, I'll organise the food and bring Jamie here, and you can sit and relax"

"It's a date. What's Nathan up to tonight?"

Haley sighed and she rolled her dark eyes, "Clay's taking him out"

It hurt too much to laugh, Brooke fought the urge at Haley's expression, she relaxed her body "he's not a bad guy, you know"

"Right, and the fact he's your toy boy doesn't cloud your judgement" Haley scoffed.

"Actually…" Brooke drawled, "We dropped the benefits from friends with benefits a while ago. _And,_ believe it or not, a lot of the time we just talk"

Haley laughed, "You talk? What do you possibly talk about?"

With a shrug Brooke averted her eyes, "we have more in common than you think" she looked at Haley, "he's one of the good guys, Haley, and he has a good heart. It's just a little broken too"

A sarcastic comment came to Haley though it didn't pass her lips, she was drawn in by Brooke's seriousness, instead Haley nodded and smiled, more than anyone else she trusted Brooke and knew her friend was one of the last people around to easily trust a man's heart.

"Speaking of hearts and that, have a told you the latest on tornado Taylor?" Haley smirked while Brooke leant forward waiting to hear the latest gossip, and the change of subject did the job. The two settled into easy conversation until it was time to part.

Feeling better Brooke started her car with an easy stomach and anticipation, instead of getting out of the car, like she usually did when she picked Noah up, Brooke stayed in her seat as she waited for her son.

Noah appeared after the crowd of children thinned, he carried a pile of books in his arms, and Brooke exited the car without a second thought. Her cramps making an appearance as the mother made her way to her son and took the books, "how was school today?"

"Good" Noah walked to the car without adding anything more to his answer.

Brooke was used to Noah when he was not in the mood for conversation, she followed him and once they were both buckled in she looked at her son with an understanding smile, "you still okay with going?"

He gave a single nod and then looked out the window, his green eyes lost in thought.

-x-

Fresh from his shower Lucas dressed in clean, crisp clothes, and when he did up the last button and looked at himself in the mirror he didn't take in how the blue of his shirt made his eyes pop, or that he needed to shave. Lucas sighed and turned away from his reflection, all he saw was a lost man.

All he needed was his keys and wallet, Lucas left the house again, this time by car. After one quick stop he arrived at the cemetery and reached for the flowers he's just bought, with the bouquet in hand Lucas took the solemn walk he knew by heart.

Lucas paused by a tree to look up at his destination and he froze unable to take a step further at the sight that greeted him.

Even from behind and so far away Lucas recognised Brooke's form, she knelt by Keith's grave, she sat with her legs to one side on the edge of Keith's grave, her head tilted and Lucas knew she was speaking to his uncle's headstone.

Still, Brooke's body was facing their sons direction; Noah knelt by the white headstone, his head bowed.

For a moment all Lucas could do was watch them silently, it wasn't long before Brooke turned her head and saw him. Her surprise quickly turning to empathy, she stood with a quick word to Noah and met Lucas half way.

Brooke stopped her hand from reaching for Lucas, "Hi" she greeted Lucas then checked on Noah before continuing, "I'm sorry if we're in your way, if you would like to be alone I'll-"

"Stay" Lucas grabbed for Brooke's hand, his eyes searching hers, "please. She's his sister too and I'm…" he choked up, "just thank you for bringing Noah"

Together they walked to join Noah, as they got closer Lucas noticed a brightly wrapped present Noah had with him, he sent Brooke a questioning look.

"Every year on Noah's birthday I would buy him a gift, something I imagined he would like. I couldn't give them to him so I donated each present every year to a child in need, it helped me on one of the hardest days of the year, and I thought it could help Noah too and remind him of his little sister who watches over him"

"I like that" Lucas smiled.

They walked in silence after that and then Lucas knelt down beside Noah, his hand lifted to run across his daughter's name.

He had chosen a simple headstone, engraved with her name, the date of her stillbirth and a quote his mother had helped him pick. It had all felt surreal back then, and it still did a year later.

"Dad's here too" Noah spoke; he looked to his father and then placed his small hand on Lucas' shoulder, with a squeeze of comfort.

Lucas replaced the dead flowers with the new bouquet, this time he had gone for a combination of pink flowers including pale roses.

"Mom said I should speak to Sawyer, that she can hear me where ever she is" Noah seemed unsure.

Lucas paused before rubbing Noah's shoulder and he looked from the sky to the grave, "happy birthday, Baby-girl. I miss you, I miss you every day but one more so than today-" and Lucas talked, and then he talked some more, with Noah inching closer to him.

Close but apart, Brooke stood watching over Lucas and Noah, she wasn't close enough to hear what they were saying but she could hear the soft tones of Lucas' voice and Brooke smiled, slightly sad yet hopeful that Lucas was taking another step towards healing.

And then they laughed, the gentle chuckles of father and son blended effortless together. The sun suddenly came out as the clouds shifted above and Brooke's mind went back to the child they had all lost the chance of knowing, and she wondered if Sawyer was somewhere else now safe with her grandmothers and great uncle, all them together without pain, guardian angels to their loved ones below.

Brooke blinked at the unfairness that Lucas had lost his daughter before he ever really had a chance to have her, for the pain that had her oldest friend leave everything she knew, for the innocent child that never got to experience all the highs and lows of growing up. Yet it made Brooke extra conscious of how grateful she was for a second chance with the son she'd almost missed out on, that each day was a gift.

-x-

The engine had barely stopped when Jamie unbuckled his seatbelt and pulled open the car door, he jumped out, and leaving his mother he raced to his aunt's front door.

Haley grumbled as she struggled to carry the food yet inwardly her heart warmed at her son's excitement. By the time she joined Jamie he had already repeatedly pressed the doorbell, Haley sent her son a look and he quickly snatched his hand back before he could press it again.

The door opened and Haley almost jumped in surprise at Lucas standing barefoot in Brooke's entrance way, "hello stranger, I didn't expect you here" and she stepped towards Lucas, Haley placed a kiss on his cheek and the way she touched his arm as he took the food from her spoke louder than words.

Lucas gave a nod, his eyes saying he was doing as well as he could be, "come on in, Brooke's just having a rest. Hey, Jamie, why don't you go let Aunt Brooke know dinner is here"

"Be gentle" Haley warned as Jamie ran off, "and walk inside!" she added. Jamie gave a huff but changed his pace.

"Where's Noah?" Haley asked as she followed Lucas towards the kitchen.

"Upstairs, doing his homework." Lucas reached the counter and unpacked the containers; he sniffed the air, "Is this your vegetarian lasagne?"

"Yes it is. It's one of Brooke's favourites" Haley took over unpacking, finding the plates and cutlery. Once the table was set Haley looked at Lucas, her eyes wide, "I'm glad you're here"

"Me too" Lucas suddenly choked up, "it's been a hard day"

"We're all here for you" Haley promised, "for all your hardest days"

Lucas reached out and hugged Haley, pulling her as close as he could, he closed his eyes, "thank you for being my best friend. For everything you do for me and for my son, and for Brooke" he pulled slightly away, "it means a lot"

"Of course, we're family"

They embraced again, this time for longer, until Brooke's husky voice interrupted them, "that smells amazing".

Haley stepped away from Lucas and motioned for Brooke to sit down, "get yourself comfortable" and she narrowed her eyes at Lucas next, "you too" she pointed her finger at her brother-in-law and the two other adults complied, taking their seats at the nearby table.

"Not you" Haley stopped Jamie as he took a seat, she smiled at her young son, "Noah's in his room-"

"Yeah, yeah" Jamie rolled his eyes and slipped off the seat, he left the room with a huff as the adults chuckled. Haley reached for a bottle of wine and three glasses, and then she poured her friends a drink each and looked into their shadowed eyes, each haunted by different pains.

Lucas held the glass to his lips before he took his first sip, his eyes meeting the deep red liquid, he glanced up to meet Brooke's gaze and she gave him a small smile. A smile quirked his lips and Lucas took the sip.

It had been a long day, Lucas had woken alone reinforcing the emptiness of what the day represented, and now he was surrounded by reminders that he was not alone.

After the glass was placed down Lucas' mind wandered elsewhere, for the first time in a long time Lucas thought of Peyton, and it surprised him how he hadn't thought of her sooner. He hoped she wasn't alone today, he hoped Peyton had something to give her even a small piece of happiness.

The boys joined them, and Haley placed the last dish on the table and took her own seat, her hands reached out to signal the beginning of saying grace. Lucas felt Brooke's fingers curl around his own, the familiar tingle ran up his arm, and Noah took his other hand.

Lucas closed his eyes, a realisation settling over his tired body. Even gripped by painful grief, even with his sorrow threatening to drown him, Lucas realised he wasn't unhappy.

-x-


	28. Chapter 28

**Disclaimer: same as the twenty seven other times.**

 **Thanks for the reviews even if I can't answer your questions. All things will be revealed in time.**

Chapter Twenty Eight

It was an exceptionally cold December, ice frosted the town, and Brooke wondered if they would have the rare two days of snow that every few years hit Tree Hill. A white Christmas would be a sight to see in their small town and Brooke stared out the window at the lights that twinkled everywhere along the street, her own house was a festive haven with holly, ornaments and lights tastefully decorating every room except their own private bedrooms.

The smell lingered through the house too, of pine and cinnamon, making the large house even homier than usual.

A fire burned in the fireplace, stockings hanging in a line, Brooke smiled at the sight. This is what she had imagined when she'd first walked into the house, and it exceeded her expectations.

"You should put your coat on" Brooke looked away from her window, and the cold day waiting outside, she turned towards Sam, "it's getting colder outside"

"Yes, _Mom_ " Sam said if with affectionate mocking, wrapping her arms around her former foster mother, "you worry too much"

"You give me little reason not to" Brooke chuckled and kissed Sam on the cheek before leading her to the entrance, "I'm just happy you could come today"

"Me too. I'm sorry I can't make it tomorrow-"

"Rebecca is your family too" Brooke smiled again, "have a good Christmas" there was a slight tone of sadness to her words and they hugged goodbye by the door. Sam grabbed her coat as Brooke opened the house to the elements, buttoning it up as the older woman sent her a look.

They hugged again, pulling apart with a goodbye each, both focused on the other that they didn't notice they weren't alone until a voice interrupted them.

"Samantha!"

Brooke's smile fell and she turned towards her mother's voice, Sam's smile grew wider and she left Brooke's side to close the distance to where Victoria was walking towards them, purse in hand.

She hid her confusion, Brooke put on a fake smile, "Mother, I wasn't expecting you here… now"

Victoria placed a kiss on Sam's other cheek, ignoring her daughters words as she asked the teenager how she was, they briefly talked and Sam shrugged her shoulders as she stepped away ending the conversation "… I better go. See ya" she waved goodbye as she headed towards her car.

With a flick of her hair Victoria turned back to Brooke, "it's Christmas! I thought I could use your guestroom and be there with you and Noah in the morning"

"I-uh-" Brooke stumbled over her words.

Another voice joined them, "how many bags do you need!"

Brooke wanted to pinch herself, "Daddy" her mouth dropped open. Richard Theodore Davis walked down her pathway, loaded with luggage, in his usual suit and tie.

"Hi, Princess"

Victoria rolled her eyes, "when I told your father you were hosting Christmas tomorrow he insisted in joining" and she hurried pass Brooke, with a simple kiss on her cheek before entering the house.

Shocked Brooke was speechless, she remembered her mother asking her what her plans were for Christmas and telling Victoria about the dinner party tomorrow night yet there had been no discussion about Victoria joining her and her friends.

"It's just I didn't expect you to be staying here-here" Brooke smiled and then hugged her father when he reached her.

Ted dropped the suitcases and bags, shaking off his coat and scarf, "what a beautiful home you have-"

"Where's my grandson?" Victoria cut in.

"With his dad" Brooke held in the sigh, "they'll be here later. Actually, because it's Christmas… Lucas is staying in the guestroom"

"Luckily he still has a house" Victoria waved the complication away.

Trying to sound as unbothered as she could be Brooke smiled, "actually Karen and Andy are using Lucas' place. I only have the one guestroom anyway-" Brooke didn't mention the room Sam had set up on the odd occasion she stayed the night, "you and Daddy can use the Manning Street house" she referred to her previous address.

"That sounds perfect" Ted nodded, "what time should we arrive tomorrow?"

Brooke kissed her father gratefully, "dinner is at five"

"I guess it will have to do" Victoria lifted her chin, "is Samantha returning tomorrow?"

"No, she's with her Mom for Christmas"

"For god sake Victoria" Ted exclaimed, "let's give her some peace and quiet, we will be back tomorrow. Brooke, is there internet at your other place?"

"Uh… no" Brooke winced.

Victoria rolled her eyes, leaving Ted with the luggage she headed back for the car, Ted glanced at his phone giving Brooke a rushed goodbye before following Victoria.

As soon as her parents were gone Brooke closed the door and sighed, she wanted no more surprises before tomorrow night.

-x-

For a moment Lucas paused as he stood outside Brooke's house, the door had been painted red a long time ago, as Noah walked with his bag towards the front door.

With his own back slung over his shoulder, Lucas smiled at himself, at the feelings that tugged at his heart as he walked towards the front door. Brooke was there waiting, the door opened before Noah even reached it and Brooke was there with a dazzling smile and open arms.

Whispered welcomes and kisses greeted Noah who accepted the affection with little reluctance and a shy smile, and then Brooke straightened and her dimpled were directed at Lucas, "come in, get out of the cold, it's freezing outside"

Lucas followed Brooke and their son inside, the house smelt like Christmas and Lucas saw the flickering light of the fireplace.

Despite the chill, Brooke was barefooted and Lucas slipped off his own shoes by the door after Noah did the same, though the boy walked off with his in hand and Lucas paused.

"By the doors fine" Brooke told Lucas, "here, I'll show you the guest room"

"Anything will be better than the couch" Lucas chuckled remembering the last few nights he'd had at home, as they walked by the formal dining room Lucas' eyes caught something. He stopped, narrowing his gaze at the fireplace and the stocking strung above, "is that?"

Brooke shrugged "I couldn't resist"

The end stocking was embroidered for him, not with his name, the moniker _Broody_ was proudly displayed, "where's the one with Cheery on it?"

Her only answer was a laugh. Brooke ignored Lucas and continued up the grand staircase, when they reached his room she remained by the door, "here you go. I'll let you get settled".

Alone Lucas dropped his bag, he breathed in the air which was had a scent he could not name clinging to it, and somewhere in the house he could hear Brooke's voice, loud and cheery, and Noah's a softer murmur. It was music to his ears.

Fifteen minutes later Lucas jogged down the stairs following their voices to the family loving area, Noah sat at the kitchen counter with a hot drink, Brooke leaning over from the other side with her own large mug in her hands.

Steam came from the drinks, "that smells good" Lucas licked his lips, "where's mine?"

Noah smirked from his perch, he didn't quite understand it yet he always felt delight when he watched his parents talk and interact.

"You've got hands" Brooke kinked her brow.

Lucas pouted, "Is that how it is?"

"Perhaps if you asked _nicely_ "

Lucas walked behind Brooke, dropping his bottom lip, "pretty please may I have a hot chocolate?"

Brooke rolled her eyes, "I suppose so" she pushed herself away from the oversized kitchen counter, and Lucas stayed close as she quickly made him a drink. Brooke stopped and looked over her shoulder, her brow kinked again "marshmallow?"

"Of course" Lucas folded his arms.

A few seconds later Brooke handed him a steaming mug and they both returned their attention to Noah, side by side.

-x-

Christmas morning had been quiet, Brooke looked back on the day with satisfaction, though Noah didn't wake up early and gleefully run towards his presents, it had been magical in its own way.

They had slept in, waking after ten to have a late breakfast that Brooke cooked while Lucas and Noah played chess. It was pass midday by the time they got to the Christmas tree and Noah opened the presents from his parents.

No gift was extravagant, Brooke had gifted Noah with clothes, a new video game, two board games and an inflatable raft, while Lucas' gifts for Noah included a couple of books and a new clarinet because he had expressed interest in learning the instrument. Noah showed gratitude with each gift and treated them carefully, thanking his parents with a secret smile and a gentle hug each.

Noah gave Lucas a short story he'd written for him and carefully presented with his mother's help, and Lucas was sure he had never received a better present. For his mother Noah had organised a series of photographs he had taken himself and framed them for her.

They didn't eat lunch, spending the time in front of the fireplace sprawled on the floor playing one of Noah's new games.

Brooke left Noah and Lucas to themselves as she got ready, then with her apron in place Brooke started Christmas dinner.

An hour later Lucas joined her while Noah practiced his clarinet upstairs, the kitchen was a mess by the end of it and Lucas shook his head at Brooke amazed she had managed to keep her clothes clean.

"Everybody better like this" she grunted.

Lucas used his finger to try the pumpkin pie filling, "taste gooood"

"Get your dirty hands away from my hard labour"

"Hey I helped"

"Barely" she huffed. Brooke placed the pie in the oven and then checked on the turkey, "next year Haley can do this" she whispered to herself.

The doorbell rang at four and they both looked up, "it's probably your mom" Brooke told him though neither moved.

Lucas lifted a finger in her direction, "or possibly yours" he shook his head, "Victoria hates me"

"She hates everybody"

"It's your house"

Brooke grabbed a nearby bowl, "my hands are full" she scrunched up her face as if she was exhausted, "there's just so much to do, if only someone kind would help me and answer my door"

Lucas threw in the towel. "Fine, you win" he laughed and quickly washed his hands before heading for the front of the house.

On the other side Victoria and Richard Davis waited, they stared at Lucas, Victoria with a cold look and Ted with an enthusiastic fake grin. Victoria eyed Lucas up and down and then threw him her coat, "are you the butler now?" she asked breezing pass him.

"Sorry" Ted whispered yet still handed Lucas his coat and scarf as he joined Victoria.

"Welcome" Lucas deadpanned, "it's nice to see you both again"

"Yes, yes" Ted clapped his hands, "you too… uh…Lew-uh… look how beautiful that tree is, magnificent!" he talked a mile a minute and did his best to cover forgetting Lucas' name. It was obvious to them all and Victoria hid a smile.

Brooke came from the kitchen "Merry Christmas!"

As she hugged her parents, Lucas took care of the coats, listening in as Ted and Victoria vied for Brooke's affection.

Ted quickly wandered off to make a phone call and Victoria went to place the gift bags in her hands under the tree, pulling multiple presents from inside them.

Soon Noah came running down the stairs and Victoria's attitude changed; the older woman warmed to her grandson in an easy genuine way that was so opposite to her usual self. Noah did no wrong in Victoria's eyes, and she gushed over how much he had grown and brushed his hair down without thought as she asked him questions.

The doorbell rang again, and Lucas gratefully went and answered it breathing a sigh of relief when he saw his mother, little sister and stepfather on the other side.

"Merry Christmas!" Lily yelled jumping at Lucas and then she little girl spied Brooke and ran towards the fashion designer, "Brooke, Brooke, look at my bow! I'm wearing the dress you made for me, and look Mama let me wear nail polish!"

Lucas couldn't help but smile, then he turned away from the sight of Brooke picking up his sister and met his mother's blue eyes, he embraced Karen and felt her hug him back, "Merry Christmas, Ma".

-x-

The Christmas feast lasted long into the night; Lily fell asleep in Andy's arms, Jamie on the couch while Noah had been sent to bed when he'd started to yawn.

Mouth and Millie excused themselves after dessert, and surprisingly Ted fit in well with the men, speaking business to Andy and sports with the younger men.

With a glass of wine Victoria was comfortable, bantering with her ex-husband, and discussing travel with Karen and sneaking in some business talk with Brooke, most of her time was preoccupied by Noah.

Haley and Nathan, with Jamie sleeping in his arms, were the next to leave, and when Karen mentioned taking Lily home Ted was quick to suggest calling it a night as well.

They'd cleaned as the night went on, and when the house was silent except for the music playing in the background, Brooke collected the glasses as Lucas checked for missed rubbish, and then he blew out the candles.

The fire still burned and Lucas turned the wood, Brooke reappeared, "you can let that burn out" her husky voice surprised him; she was closer than he had expected. Lucas straightened up, sending her a smile.

"Tonight was great, you did a fantastic job"

"We didn't poison anyone" she shrugged. The song playing stopped, the room was deathly silent for a moment before the next one played, neither spoke, and Brooke looked up from the fire "we should get some sleep"

"And you don't mind I stay again?"

"Of course, you can't drive and my bed is more comfortable than your couch" she winced, "I mean my spare bed" Brooke corrected herself with an awkward smile.

As innocent as the comment was Lucas was distracted, flashes went through his mind, he could picture their bodies collapsing onto a soft mattress, softer than possible, their clothes disappearing in only a way they could in a dream.

Lucas blinked, Brooke was staring up at him, her eyes golden in the light of the fire, "I guess this is goodnight" she whispered.

She went to turn and Lucas grabbed for her hand, his fingers instead wrapping around her wrist stilling her movement. Brooke turned back to Lucas and he licked his lips, "before you go, I have a present for you"

"You already gave me a present" she looked away, "and I told you that you shouldn't have" her mind went to the bracelet he'd handed her when they were swapping gifts after dinner.

Lucas let go of her wrist, "just give me a second" and he jogged away coming back with another wrapped gift. Brooke slowly took the gift and unwrapped it meticulously, taking her time as Lucas watched on.

"It's a book?" Brooke was surprised and slightly let down, "thanks"

Reading her mind Lucas turned the book over, "it's an advance copy of my new book" he told her as her eyes went to his name on the front, "I wanted you to be one of the first to have a copy"

As she opened the book Brooke felt his eyes on her, "thank you" she whispered, her fingers moving over the title, and then Brooke looked up with a wry smile, "I hope it does better than your last"

"I'm going to miss you when I'm on tour" he leant forward and added in a whisper, "and it is better".

Brooke closed the book, holding it to her chest, "I don't have anything else for you"

He shrugged, "you've given me enough"

Their eyes stayed locked until a loud crack from the fire had Brooke jumping back, "Good night, Luke" she quickly said stepping away, Brooke dropped the book in her hurry tripping over it, she swore and kicked off her heels.

A hand came in line with her vision and Brooke looked up at Lucas, running her eyes from his fingers to his face, she gave in, taking his offered hand and balancing her hand with her heels against his chest as she straightened up again.

Lucas laughed and his eyes trailed up to the mistletoe above him, hers followed, and he gave an innocent smile, "its tradition" he told her before leaning down.

Her whole body froze, Brooke felt her whole body heat up, it started at her chest, and the milliseconds it took for Lucas' lips to meet hers felt like hours.

Still, Brooke couldn't move, and his lips brushed hers, once and then twice and then they pressed against her coaxing Brooke and her lips moved, her body melting into him.

The heels fell to the ground unnoticed and Lucas wrapped his hands around Brooke, pulling her closer as the kiss deepened. A moan escaped one of them; neither knew who made the sound, all Lucas knew was he didn't want to stop.

Picking Brooke up Lucas lifted her onto the dining table and her mouth opened as the kiss turned into something more.

Another song begun, it's beat faster, and Brooke ran her hands under Lucas' shirt. In the back of her mind Brooke wanted away from the heat but she moved closer to its source, aching to feel Lucas' skin.

Then Brooke remembered where they were, who she was kissing, and with everything inside her she pushed against his chest, their lips parted, the air coming from their mouths like a released suction cap.

Breath heavy Brooke used her hands to put distance between them, "I should go to bed" she closed her eyes, dropping her hands from Lucas as his grip tightened on her waist, "alone" she clarified.

With a nod Lucas stepped back putting space between them, Brooke hopped down from the dining table and smoothed her outfit, her eyes avoiding his.

"Good night, Brooke" even though Lucas meant it, his voice laced with longing, it sounded mocking to Brooke's ears as her nerves shook inside her. And then he kissed her again, this time so quick she had no time to stop it, the soft touch of his lips almost like a promise.

Brooke did her best not to run to her room, she didn't look back or let out her breath until she was in her bedroom, the door closed. Collapsing against the oak door, Brooke let her breath go, and then she undid her clothes to help cool down her burning body.

Left by the fire Lucas watched the empty space Brooke had vanished into for a long moment, and then he picked up the forgotten book and placed it on the table. Lucas opened it to the third page before he left the room, heading upstairs. Lucas whistled, a skip in his step, and when he went to bed sleep came easy to the author.

 _Someone once advised me to heal my heart with my writing, this is for you. For all the times you were there when I needed you and all the times you knew to give me space. Thank you._

-x-


	29. Chapter 29

**Disclaimer: I don't own OTH or its characters. Or much at all.**

 _A/N: Hey guys, thanks for your reviews and favourites, and to those who are still reading this story. This chapter is a little present for you all. Enjoy :)_

Chapter Twenty Nine

Nervous anticipation filled Brooke as the plane landed in New York, and Noah looked out the window, the boy didn't have to be jumping in his seat for Brooke to know her son was as excited as her to be here. Brooke didn't realise how much she had grown to rely on Lucas, how much she lived for the moments they spent together, until the chance to see him was gone.

When Brooke snatched Noah's hand and held on tight it wasn't for his benefit, and together they left the plane, her heart thumping hard. Noah gave Brooke's hand a squeeze, they kept walking, and then Brooke saw him.

Her breath stopped for a moment, Brooke felt the smile that she couldn't stop steal her lips. She feared she looked like a love struck teenager, she could have stayed standing looking at Lucas for hours and it was Noah stepping forward dragging her with him that had Brooke stumble forward.

Lucas bent down to greet Noah, they shared their handshake and then Lucas stood to meet Brooke's eyes. His smile was too lazy and she thought that look should be outlawed. Still Brooke smiled, "hi"

"Hi" he greeted back and held out the flowers for her to take, "for you"

"They're beautiful, thanks Luke" she sniffed the bouquet. So lost in her thoughts Brooke missed what Lucas had been saying, she nodded and mumbled a random affirmative answer and with a smile lead the way. Lucas and Noah matched her steps quickly.

When they reached the car the driver opened the door, "welcome back, Miss Davis" and she slid in first, Lucas' hand brushing her lower back as he helped her in. A blush caused Brooke's face to grow pink, she buried her nose in the flowers again in an effort to hide her flushed state.

By the time all three of them were heading towards her New York apartment, Noah and Lucas were deep in conversation. Noah asked all the questions Brooke wanted to know, how Lucas' book promotion was going, what had he seen and done, she wanted to know everything.

Lucas smiled at Noah, "but I've missed you buddy." And then Lucas looked over Noah and straight at Brooke, "both of you".

If hearts could melt Brooke felt hers becoming a puddle, he had a way with words, it wasn't always about what he said but how Lucas said it. The slow timber to his voice, the sure confidence and the way he spoke as if he had a secret you wanted to know.

They hadn't had a chance to see each other much since Christmas, since he kissed her, or she kissed him, Brooke wasn't so sure what to call it. It was their secret, she hadn't even told Haley about it, and sometimes she could almost pretend it was a dream. If it wasn't for the way Lucas looked at her, the way his eyes darkened and Brooke realised she was the secret his smile kept.

-x-

It was only three nights, Lucas knew, yet as he followed Brooke and Noah into her New York apartment where he'd spent the last week, it was oddly satisfying for the author to know they were all under the same roof. Lucas could almost say he felt giddy, if the word didn't have his mind conjure up the image of a teenage girl with her first crush, though nothing else seemed to adequately describe his feelings.

Noah calmly left his parents to take his small bag into his New York bedroom, the apartment was stocked enough that Noah and Brooke didn't need to bring anything with them if they didn't want to. Brooke kicked off her flats and sighed heavily with relief, "I am _starving_ " she groaned, and then sent a sweet smile Lucas' way, "so where are you taking us for lunch?"

"You're actually going to let me pick?" he looked at her with amused doubt.

"Well…" her nose crinkled, "I was going to reject whatever you suggested and then pick this place near Clothes over Bros that you're going to _love_ " she kinked her brow and walked by Lucas, knocking his arm as she went.

Lucas shook his head and chuckled, "you drive me crazy sometimes"

"And you love it" Brooke shot back, disappearing in the apartment as she headed to the master room. Lucas licked his lips and looked down, her voice still echoing in his mind.

He whispered with a smile, " _Yes, I do_ ".

Soon Noah reappeared, he kneeled on the couch facing his father, "am I allowed to read your new book?"

"Maybe when you're older" Lucas ruffled his son's hair which earned him a frown, "it's not for young children"

"Then I wouldn't read any of the books I like" his frown deepened.

Lucas thought over his latest novel, he'd returned to elements that had made his first book so successful, it wasn't something he'd like his eight year old to read yet Lucas looked at Noah and was reminded that his son was not like most eight year olds. He nodded, "I'll see what your mother thinks"

"About what?" Brooke walked back in, a new outfit showing off her figure and a pair of heels in her hands, she wore a dress which Lucas had noticed was something that she did a lot more now as an adult compared to back in high school when she was more comfortable in a pair of tight jeans.

He tore his eyes away from her, "Noah would like to read my new book"

For a moment Brooke stood thinking about it and then she gave a nod, "I don't see why not, he's read Hamlet after all"

Noah grinned, his dimples on show, clearly pleased with himself.

Brooke pointed a finger at her son, "just this one, mister".

"Okay" Noah agreed reluctantly.

"You hungry? Your father is taking us out for lunch"

"Right" Lucas grinned, "I know the perfect place" he winked at Brooke and she laughed.

Confused Noah looked between his parents; he had no idea what was so funny.

They returned two hours later, Noah didn't want to miss a documentary on the history channel, and Brooke and Lucas headed straight for the kitchen where she poured them both a glass of wine. She looked from Noah to Lucas, "he's almost as big a nerd as you" she said it with affection and Lucas smiled in return.

"I-" he began but they both stopped and looked towards the door when there was a knock. It was a private apartment building, and the security was strict so few people would be able to make it to the door without prior warning.

A second later the door unlocked and Victoria walked in, a dress bag hanging by her finger, "Mother, what a surprise" Brooke gave a tight smile.

"I thought I would deliver the gown myself. It's one of your better designs" and despite her cool voice Brooke knew that was as close to a compliment as Victoria could give. Almost instantly Victoria searched for Noah, she spied her grandson in front of the television and noticed his rapt expression. Not wanting to disturb him she simply gave a smile before facing her daughter again, she held out the dress bag, "have you organised the limo?"

"Yes" Brooke snatched the dress from her mother.

Victoria made a sound, "did you arrange one of the Nick's?"

The silence that followed was answer enough and Victoria sighed, and then her eyes turned to Lucas and her cold blue stare narrowed in thought as she eyes the toned blonde in front of her. Lucas shifted his feet feeling suddenly uncomfortable, Victoria didn't blink, "and your plans tonight, Mr Scott?"

Brooke quickly opened her mouth, "no, before you get any ideas, Lucas is watching Noah tonight"

"I don't see why my grandson cannot spend one night with me" she shot a look at Brooke and then went back to studying Lucas, "you have some sort of suit I presume?"

"Ah… yes" Lucas swallowed.

"Your book is being released in two days?"

Lucas looked to Brooke and saw her close her eyes, he nodded. Victoria clapped, "perfect. I'll spend some quality time with Noah, Mr Scott gets free publicity and you my dear don't look pathetic showing up alone"

Brooke clenched her jaw, speaking through gritted teeth "thanks, mother"

"You're welcome" Victoria brushed her hair behind her shoulder, "I will return at five" and she left as quickly as she appeared.

Wine glass clenched between her fingers Brooke took a long sip, finishing her wine in three seconds, she smiled at Lucas "ever been to a runway show before"

Lucas couldn't help but grin, "Not since your private shows our senior year" and Brooke reached over and slapped him, " _ow_. Hey, if you want to go alone I will tell your mom where to shove-"

"No, it's fine. I guess you can hold my purse for me" she drawled and tried to take a sip from her empty glass.

-x-

The limos door was opened for him and Lucas slid out, nerves caused his hand to shake as he straightened up and faced the line of paparazzi with a gulp. He froze and then remembered where he was and turned back to lean in to offer a hand to Brooke.

One high heeled foot appeared; the slit in her floor length gown opened showing one bare leg as Brooke took his hand and stepped out, then the dresses black skirt slipped into place taking away the tantalising view.

Lucas hadn't gotten much of a reaction though once Brooke's hand was in his and they stepped forward onto the red carpet the cameras turned their way lighting them up with flash after flash. Brooke smiled effortlessly and Brooke was reminded how he always had a fear Brooke was just destined for a bigger world than he belonged in.

She was stunning, he hadn't been able to speak when he saw her in the gown, her dark hair perched high exposing her slender pale neck. The dress had a plunging neck line that went down to her waist, as she moved her navel came in and out of sight. It was backless too and though the front flowed loosely the dress clenched together at her waist before clinging to Brooke's hips and things and then flowed to the ground. The black material seemed to shimmer and Lucas didn't know what to do, there hadn't been a purse, Brooke had hidden phone and the few items needed to touch up her make up within Lucas' pockets, so he stood awkwardly as photos were snapped of Brooke.

When asked who she was wearing Brooke's eyes twinkled, "me, of course" and she winked.

Brooke kept walking, she looked back at Lucas trailing behind her and quickly reached for his shaking hand, "relax" she mouthed and pulled him to her side.

More flashes hit them and Brooke whispered, "Smile" and Lucas felt her squeeze his hand. He smiled.

When they asked who she was with Brooke leant briefly against him, "a friend, Lucas Scott, he's in town for his book release this weekend" and then answered the questions about what he was wearing.

A reporter laughed at Lucas' confusion and how easily Brooke answered the question, "just a friend? You know a lot about his wardrobe"

"That's my job" Brooke smiled and tugged Lucas further along, her dimpled smile still shining brightly.

This was clearly where Brooke was in her element, Lucas soon realised, and he watched her network the room and then saw the way her eyes lit up and she leaned forward when the show began. .The final dress had Brooke gasping, her hand unconsciously grabbing Lucas' knee.

It felt like hours for Lucas, he had no interest in what he thought were the most bizarre clothes he'd ever seen, though he loved watching Brooke as she saw something he could not see.

"I hope that wasn't too boring for you" Brooke bit her lip as they returned to the limo later in the night.

Lucas shook his head, "no, it was fun"

She kinked her brow, "right, come on Luke, you probably wanted to be anywhere else. I'm surprised you didn't fall asleep"

Still looking at her, Lucas shrugged his shoulders, "there's nowhere else I would have been" and he let his eyes stay locked to her until he could see her breath hitch. Brooke looked away first, she lowered her lashes and grabbed the first thing that she could to change the subject.

"I haven't eaten since lunch, I can't wait to get back to the apartment and order something greasy" she tried to laugh.

Two blocks away, Lucas looked out the window and then asked the driver to pull over. "What are you doing?" Brooke frowned as Lucas opened the door, he held out his hand to her and she looked at him with a strange look.

"You hungry or not?"

Brooke laughed, "sure" and she took his hand.

Once they were on the sidewalk Lucas lifted his hand, "what would m'lady like, hotdogs or tacos?"

"That actually sounds amazing"

"Which one?"

"Both" Brooke smiled and then she walked to the front of the limo and told the driver to head home early. The night had cooled and as they walked down the street Lucas shrugged off his jacket and draped it over her shoulders, she smiled in gratitude and their steps began to slow matching each other.

They ended up with a burrito each, which Lucas carried in a plastic bag, while they walked down the street with a hotdog in their hands. Brooke was grateful she kept flats in the limo, her feet did not ache as they made their way under the night sky.

"Do you get nervous?" Lucas asked.

Brooke gave him a side look and swallowed her last bite; she felt the sauce run down her chin and licked it with her tongue. She laughed, "do you when you speak about your books, I saw you on the late night show the other night"

"Hell yes, I'm nervous. You didn't answer my question either"

She shrugged, "not really. I guess I'm just used to it"

"You're so composed" Lucas looked ahead of them, "I don't know how you do it"

"I just do-"

"You were born for this. You don't even realise how effortlessly you handle it all, how people just gravitate towards you"

Brooke's eyes darkened, handling people had never felt effortless to Brooke, and she didn't feel like people gravitated towards her either in fact Brooke often felt the opposite. Relationships were always so complicated.

As if he could read her mind Lucas added, "For someone who is so confident you never seem to believe it. Don't you know, Brooke Davis, you were always destined for more than just Tree Hill, everyone saw it."

She smiled gently, "it's strange because there's nowhere else I'd rather be than Tree Hill… it's my home. I smile at the cameras, I enjoy the shows and the people but my heart… my heart knows Tree Hill is home"

They stopped and Lucas couldn't resist tucking the stray strand of her hair behind her ear, he smiled at her "I'm glad".

They didn't talk for a long time after that as they walked and ate. Lucas eventually suggested waving down a taxi to take them back to the apartment but Brooke suggested they finish the walk there.

The conversation came easily once again and sooner than either expected they were outside Brooke's apartment. They chatted all the way up to her floor but once inside they turned silent again.

Neither knew what to say, good night or something else, Brooke took of her shoes and slipped off Lucas' jacket to return to him. As he dropped it on the kitchen counter she kept her eyes on him, "thanks, by the way, for coming tonight" she rolled her eyes, "and saving me from looking _pathetic_ "

"You would never look pathetic" he smiled and shrugged a shoulder, "but you're welcome. I actually had a good time"

She straightened his tie to keep her hands busy, "well you cleaned up very nicely tonight. That colour suits you"

"Right" he chuckled.

Brooke patted his chest and looked at him with laughter in her eyes, "I have good taste"

"I won't disagree" and then he looked down at Brooke, approval in his eyes, "and you… you looked- look- amazing tonight. His hands brushed her bare arms and Brooke became acutely aware of her hand over his heart, she went to remove it and found herself spreading her fingers apart instead.

Pupils dilated Brooke looked shocked at her hand, and a shiver ran down her spine when Lucas ran his hands up her upper arms, over her shoulders and then down her naked back.

"We haven't talked about it yet" his voice had turned husky, it was barely above a whisper and Brooke looked up quickly into his eyes. His look was so intense Brooke felt burned; she dropped her hand and involuntarily felt her tongue stick out to lick her dry lips.

Lucas had effectively trapped Brooke in his arms; it was almost but not quite an embrace, "what happened at Christmas" his clarified.

"Mistletoe" Brooke almost choked as she tried to make her answer as flippant as possible yet she knew she had failed.

As if a magnet was bringing them closer together his face slowly lowered as hers lifted. Lucas whispered breathlessly, "there's no mistletoe here" and the words hung between them for a moment.

"Yes" Brooke agreed to his statement, her lashed covered her eyes for a second and she looked down before lifted her chin again "this mi-" whatever she was going to say was lost as Lucas closed the gap between them and kissed Brooke.

Brooke forgot what she was going to say, she forgot where she was and anything else that needed thought. Feelings controlled Brooke as heat took over her body. Brooke could feel Lucas' hands, he must have more than two because to her they felt like they were everywhere, on her back, tangled in her hair, holding her neck, teasing the collar of her dress, cupping her behind, running up and down her dress, and Brooke couldn't keep up.

The room was dark because Brooke's eyes were closed tightly, sounds came from afar, his lips trailed down her neck and then air was touching Brooke's front and her breasts were laid bare for Lucas to finish trailing his kisses lower.

Where she was, what surface she was sitting on, was a mystery to Brooke. It was his mouth on her nipple that Brooke's attention and she moaned, her hands messing his hair tugging on its length for more or less she was not sure.

And then she pulled him up to kiss her again, she took action this time, passionate and hungry, letting all her worries and fears melt away. It had been years since Brooke hadn't felt like she needed to stop a kiss with Lucas, she'd pushed him away, stopped the madness before it took them over, and she knew she'd crossed a line as she let him kiss her, as she not only kissed him back but took control of the kiss.

One minute turned into another, and then another, until Brooke could have been kissing Lucas for an hour, her lips were swollen, her body on fire, begging her for more.

The need was so strong Brooke was unsure if she'd spoken aloud all she knew was Lucas was trailing kisses down her throat again, his hands lost inside her dress, clutching her behind as he lifted her carrying Brooke away from wherever they were.

A sound escaped Brooke as he gently nipped on the side of one of her breasts and buttons ripped as Brooke dragged his shift from his back and they both snapped.

Something soft was under Brooke, the sofa she realised, and Lucas kissed were moving lower and lower until Brooke was gasping as he tugged down her thong and left it to dangle around one ankle and then Lucas' kisses became more intimate.

Brooke gripped the sofa cushions as Lucas' head stayed between her thighs, his tongue sending her closer and closer to the edge until she tipped over exploding into a million pieces before coming back again. Breathing heavy Brooke felt Lucas' breath on her stomach now and her heart pounded inside her chest.

Inside Brooke felt herself laughing, _I definitely crossed that line_. On the outside Brooke could do little as her body was a puddle, and then her hand slowly found Lucas and she lifted him up to join her, their lips meeting again. This kiss was slow and tender, different to the frenzy they'd just experienced.

Tension began to leave Lucas, he melted into the kisses, not even realising as he shifted to allow Brooke free access as her hands wandered over his naked chest, and then she paused at the belt buckle and their kissed paused.

Lucas opened his eyes and stared at Brooke beneath him, and then she opened her eyes and he searched her dark gaze barely able to really see her face in the dim moonlight.

Then slowly Brooke unbuckled his belt, the only noise in the room their shallow breathing. Brooke lowered the zip and found Lucas' already throbbing erecting that quickly sprung free. His eyes closed as her hand gripped him, " _oh god"_ he didn't know how long he'd last but Brooke took her time slowly working her hand up and down his thick length.

Brooke leant up and kissed him again and Lucas kissed her back, his hips started to move with her, thrusting to meet her movements, his pants falling further and further down.

Against her lips he panted, "god Brooke, I don't know-" he ended in another groan, kissing her passionately as their movements quickened and then Brooke lowered herself against the couch, pulling Lucas above her as she spread her legs wide to accommodate him, her hand leading him to her.

Lucas felt the head of his penis touch the waiting wetness of Brooke's opening and he shifted slightly, kissing her deeper, his tongue delving into her mouth mimicking what he wanted to do elsewhere and then her hand was gone from him and Lucas grabbed Brooke's wrist pinning them above her head as he pushed inside her in one quick thrust.

And when he groaned Brooke gave an answering moan, there was no time to pause, Lucas couldn't stop himself, he slipped out almost all the way and slammed in again, and then again, his hips bucking, Brooke lifted her hips to match each thrust.

Faster and faster they came together, until Brooke could no longer keep up and she was pinned top the couch with Lucas atop of her, her nails digging into his buttocks as he continued his pursuit to pleasure. And then he grew taut above her and exploded with a scream, tipping her over the edge all over again.

As they came back to earth their warm breaths mingled together, fast, until their breathing slowed though their hearts still beat hard inside their chests.

No words were said; they shifted slightly on the couch, wrapped in each other's arms, the shadows hiding their smiles. Eventually Lucas stood and picked Brooke up, stopping her protests with a kiss as he carried her to her room and finished undressing her.

Brooke didn't protest as he slipped into bed with her, covering their naked bodies with the sheet, and fifteen minutes later she didn't protest when he started kissing her neck from behind her, she turned into his arms and his kissed, until their kisses turned to more touching, and touching turned to returning desire until he was slipping inside her again and with breathless moans Brooke rocked against Lucas.

Afterwards, tangled together, Brooke thought over the night and smiled. Her mother had manipulated the situation for extra time with Noah, throwing Lucas and Brooke together alone for a night, this wasn't what Victoria would have wanted to happen and Brooke laughed softly against Lucas' chest.

"Are you laughing?"

Her answer was a louder chuckle and Lucas flipped her over, "I may need to work on my skills if you're laughing in bed with me"

Brooke grinned up at Lucas, "you know what they say" she kinked her brow, "practice makes perfect".

"Oh" Lucas leant down and kissed her to the side of her mouth, "I guess I will have to practice" and he kissed her lips, "and practice" he kissed her deeper, and he kept kissing her until laughing was the last thing on her mind.

-x-

When Lucas woke properly in the morning he found Brooke gone from the bed, still he couldn't help but grin, he wanted to sing or whistle but he restrained himself. Naked Lucas left the master suite and went in search for Brooke but she was no longer in the apartment, her phone was still in the jacket abandoned in the kitchen.

Lucas showered, dressed and turned on the coffee machine. It was almost an hour before Brooke returned to the apartment, her face pink, her flesh glistened with sweat, she wore sneakers and jogging gear. Her eyes avoided him but Lucas kept his trained on her, "good run?"

"Yeah" Brooke mumbled, she grabbed a bottle of water and headed for her room, Lucas followed.

She turned "do you mind, I need a shower" Brooke's words were cold, her demeanour closed off, and Lucas frowned at her but left her alone nonetheless.

It was another hour before Lucas went back to the room, he didn't knock, and Lucas found Brooke standing by the window staring out at the city.

"We can't pretend it didn't happen" he knew that's where she was going, Lucas stepped into the room, "and frankly I don't want to".

He waited, Lucas didn't move, Brooke was silent and then she turned her dark scared gaze at him, she was hugging herself and Lucas didn't take his eyes from her.

"Waking up this morning" he lifted his shoulder helplessly, "is the happiest I've been since… I can't even remember when. And I get the feeling you're about to tell me it can't happen again-"

"It shouldn't" Brooke confirmed his worry, there was a quiver of doubt in her voice when she added on "it really shouldn't" and it was that doubt that gave Lucas hope.

-x-

Brooke had listed every reason why they should stop before they go any further, and Lucas counter argued with every reason he believed they should. Then Noah returned with Victoria and the older woman looked between Lucas and Brooke for only a second before she threw her arms in the air with a sigh, her look alone speaking volumes of what she knew and what she thought of it, she kissed her grandsons head and then sent Lucas a scathing look and leaving.

With Noah between them Brooke managed to keep the rest of the day light, they didn't have to worry about what had happened between them instead their day went as planned. A lazy picnic lunch in central park, an afternoon at the museum, then a movie and take out in the comfort of the apartment. They sat on the couch, Brooke keenly aware of what had happened in the same spot the night before, with Noah on the floor with a bowl of popcorn, his presence preventing Brooke from leaving the room.

Noah fell asleep and Lucas carried him to bed, he returned to the living room to find Brooke standing by the couch, the television off. They just looked at each other, and then Brooke held out her hand, a look of defeat on her face, and Lucas took hold of her hand, wrapping his fingers around hers and followed her to her bedroom.

In the morning Brooke made sure they were awake and out of the room by the time Noah awoke, they sat across from each other at the table, Lucas acted like nothing had happened to afraid he'd push Brooke too far, he read the newspaper and drank his coffee.

Brooke eventually put her phone down, her voice hesitant "our photos are all over the internet" she gulped.

Still reading the newspaper Lucas shrugged it off, "your red carpet appearances tend to be" he knew because he'd seen the pictured enough over the years.

"Not me, _us,_ and someone took photos of the three of us together yesterday, their calling it a family day out"

Lucas shrugged, "it was"

"They're calling you my baby daddy"

Lucas dropped the newspaper, he lifted his brows, "I am" he said slowly, "and they say you can't trust the media" and then he stood and walked up behind Brooke, kissing her cheek and wrapping his arms around her, "I don't care if the world knows I'm your baby daddy" he smiled with a slight laugh and kissed her cheek again. Brooke let herself sink into his embrace, resting her head against his chin and she reached up to run a hand down his cheek.

They stayed there until the sound of Noah's door closing cut into the moment, and Lucas pulled away and went to refill Brooke's coffee. Before Noah appeared Brooke followed Lucas across the kitchen, "I just don't know if I am ready to define… this" she motioned between them, "for the world to know"

"I understand that" he looked up at the roof, his eyes squinting and Brooke but her lip with how cute he looked, "and I don't want to scare you off but I thought maybe… just maybe… when I return to Tree Hill I could take you out"

"Like a date?" she queried taking a step back.

"Something _like_ a date" he smiled.

Noah's footsteps grew closer and Brooke lowered her voice, "I suppose something like a date could work, almost like a date but kinda maybe not a date, just _like_ a date"

Lucas rocked on his feet leaning a bit closer, "I would say it's a date but…" he let his sentence run off and snuck a quick kiss before Noah appeared.

Together they both greeted their son in a too cheery tone, _"good morning"_ they grinned widely. Noah froze, his green eyes blinked and then he took a seat and grabbed Lucas' newspaper, his voice calmer than his parents, "good morning".

-x-

 _So….. how does that make you feel?_


End file.
